9 p.m.
• So I had O'Reilly on and he was talking about some hot ghetto mess Web site, and he said that this voyeuristic Web site is exploiting the inner city. He then made a side comment about how the ghetto really isn’t a mess and this is making the people of the inner city look bad. Uh, Bill.
8 p.m.
• Let's complete the humans-are-scum trifectia with this gem.
And what is this "alternative theory"?
Riiiiight. Here's the rest of the story. And LOL at the attorney firings. Just think, the one he kept offers the "alternative theory." Perhaps the other fired legal eagles had souls. Then again, probably not.
7:45 p.m.
• What the fuck is wrong with this world?
Christ only knows what happened to the other kittens. And perhaps those who compain about the teenage death not getting as much "attention" should have shown their outrage when it happened. Sad thing is the cat's probably going to die anyway and those little monsters will get counseling when they should be getting a special delivery from the Cancer Fairy.
4:30 p.m.
• As I'm typing JJ is taking a pee in the computer room litterbox. Sometimes I wonder if cats get annoyed if they're trying to do their business when someone else is in the room. I know I like to use stalls when in a public facility. God is that ever a gamble, hoping to find a toilet that's not clogged up with shit.
You know, as much as I think cigarettes are nothing more than a tax on the stupid, when will it end?
The reason I say this is because once there's not enough smokers to pay out these taxes, Big Government will come after some of the stuff I like, such as burgers, fries and soft drinks. Then again, they're already doing this, but the process will be sped up more.
1:30 p.m.
• So the better half and I had ESPN’s Mike and Mike on this morning, and they were talking about the Michael Vick case and how he’s been indicted for dog fighting. Now Mrs. kkk has a real soft spot for animals (you’d figure that out with the three cats we have), and when she heard that dogs in the Vick Manor were (allegedly) electrocuted, hung and shot, among other things, she turned the radio off. I turned it back on the local RIGHT-WING RADIO guy whose co-hosts she HATES, I then said something to her and turned my head and saw her in pre-cry mode, where her lower lip covers up her upper lip and the chin dimples start to show. Believe me, I know this look, seeing how she’s married to me. Anyway, just to be my usual asshole self, I said to her, “Now dear, this is part of their culture.” She shot back with the following remark, “Well it was part of our society’s culture to hang these niggers from a tree like they did those dogs and beat them to death. Maybe we should do that with these fucking assholes!”
Wow.
I couldn’t think of anything else to say but, “Baby, I love you.”
By the way, couldn’t Vick just own a meat processing plant and get his jollies from livestock getting killed? He could still bet money on how long it would take a cow to bleed to death or something.
As some of y'all know, even though I've left TSM, I'm still semi-active at The Pit. A few random TSM references have come up lately, and thus I meandered over to see how things are here at the infamous forums.thesmartmarks.com.
I even entered the chat room for about 45 seconds & shared a dialog with Amnesia.
I'm not sure if I'll start posting again or not, or even if I'll continue to blog or not. But rest assured, I'll be here silently and anonymously watching you all do what you do so well.
+1
So this is it—the first entry of what is sure to be one of the least-read blogs on TSM.
I’ve had a couple of web adventures like this before.
In college, shortly after I quit writing for the student newspaper, my then-roommate and I collaborated on a little website (hosted on Angelfire) that focused primarily on the sports news around our campus. It was a mild success; we had a small group of dedicated readers and even gained a tiny bit of infamy when my roommate wrote an editorial listing 23 reasons why the football coach shouldn’t have been fired (reason #12: “His wife is hot and we don’t have enough hot women around here”).
That lasted about nine months before we had to shut it down because 1) I had to get another job because I needed cash and we were not earning a dime from the website and 2) it was taking a little too much time to maintain properly.
Fast forward about four years and I opened up my own personal blog. I think all three of my friends read it…once. After a year or so, I lost interest and erased the blog from existence. It wasn’t that good anyway.
So now, I’m giving this whole blogging thing another go. I won’t promise to update on a daily basis, but I do promise to try and make a few posts a week while also making said posts interesting. Given that most of my blogging will be written while I’m “working,” there’s a decent shot of at least the former happening.
If it ends up being neither, well, bite me. It’s not like anyone’s paying me to be entertaining.
9:30 p.m.
• So tonight was Texas Roadhouse night for the kkk household. I can’t remember the last time I went, but damn I love this place. Great food, from the hard-boiled egg bits they put in the salad to that apple-butter stuff for the rolls, to the steak/chicken/pork. And the value is solid, too. Actually, I remember going here after W. got re-elected, and the place was packed with joyous Republicans. Christ only knows what it was like the day after the ’06 elections. I bet Panera Bread, Starbucks and the fag hippie eatery (Amazon café, I think it’s called) by the local mall were filled to the gills with the tofu and kelp flying off the shelves.
• On the way home from work today I saw another bumper sticker worth noting. At first I was going to mention my sight of an Edwards ’08 decal, but then a few miles later my attention turned to this gem. It was a picture of a pistol with that circle/slash symbol with the words “No handguns please.” Oh that’s fucking brilliant. If I was a carjacker I know I’d sure stay away from you. Why don’t you put a sign out on your lawn that reads, “This house is a gun-free zone.” Idiot.
• Man, and I thought those celebrity PSA’s in the States were retarded.
I love that last paragraph. Actually, from what I hear, trafficking is mad crazy down there. Then again, when it’s 11 p.m. and you’re in the mood for some Latina teen poon, Jose is only a phone call away, and the delivery charges are pretty reasonable, especially with the rising gas prices and all.
• But … but… the WWE said there weren’t any roids in Benoit’s body.
• Wow, Smues was right. Alaska sure has its share of fucked up drivers.
kkk's Top 103 Posters
Number 17: Wildbomb 4:20
Some of you may not remember this guy, but I sure do. When Mr. Bomb first came on the scene, he actually tried to make valid, thought-out arguments. Peep this post regarding media bias.
As if that wasn’t bad enough, here’s another post of his in the SAME THREAD talking about the economy.
Please note he’s not copying and pasting material someone else already wrote. This is all original thought. And you expect me to actually read all this? And what was my response to him after skimming through the latter post?
When another poster questioned why I just “refer to the very end of (the post), ignoring the meat of the information,” I had to remind him that I generally don’t read anything longer than two sentences (or three syllables) at this place. Besides, if I spent the time actually reading long, thought-out posts, you wouldn’t get such hilarity like what I posted at thread's end.
Sadly, poor Wildbomb still gave it that old $120,000 college try by attempting to generate serious discussion, but he would usually came up short. However, because we were both in the communications field, we shot the shit quite a bit via PMs, and there were actually a few threads where there was somewhat decent banter. And what did many of these threads have in common? Wildbomb wasn’t going on 500+ word posts about how much he owes in school loans. Let this be a lesson to all aspiring TSM posters – nobody wants to read all that shit. Nobody cares. If you’re going to post something long, make it be from someone else and just bold selected text to make it appear like you actually read the whole thing while hoping there’s nothing contradictory that could shoot your premise down. Wildbomb finally caught on and realized that nobody at this place is going to significantly change his or her opinions because some faceless message board poster said something smart. I have no idea what he’s been up to in the last few years, but for his sake I hope he’s paying down that $60+k in school loans. The fact he doesn’t post much, if at all, anymore is certainly a good sign.
Ha. I just goofed on Wildbomb for making long posts and I’m already at the 1400+ word mark with this entry. Well, most of this text is from, surprise, other people’s posts. Besides, this is a blog, not some hippie thread. You EXPECT this kind of deep thought in these personal journals. Well, what you expect and what you get are two different things. And I got some bad news…
…HERE COMES THE HIT SQUAD!
It's PMD up in the sector
I wreck the microphonin
I'm quick to pull a Tek
and snap that neck
and leave ya moanin
Kid I'm zoning
it's on
and I'm back up on the block
(Aiyo, we represent the sewer!)
Son, I represent the dock
(dock)
Plus I knock
(what?)
niggas out the box quickly
Kid I'm strictly motherfuckin business
so get wit me
Yo Scratch hit me
so I can do my thing and blow the spot
Here’s some more bad news – this entry ain’t getting much better.
9 p.m.
• So when cats sleep, you can tell if they’re dreaming by their paws twitching. Once in a while one of our three might give a little chirp when snoozing; God knows what they’re thinking about. However, last night when Max was sleeping on the recliner he began meowing – loudly. At first I thought I was on his tail or something, but I wasn’t. He let out a few more meows and continued his slumber. Guess it was a nightmare or something. I know it couldn’t have been an imaginary girlfriend because he’s fixed. Then again, maybe he was pissed that nothing was going on down there in dreamland.
• So I was driving home through the hood today, and what was in front of me? This hippie van-thingy in front of me that was spewing so much exhaust I had to wind up the windows and turn on the air conditioner. And what kind of bumper sticker was on it? The kind that said, “Act Green” then something about how the earth appreciates it. Oh if Mrs. kkk only got me a camera phone. Oh who am I kidding? No way in hell I’d be able to figure it out. Damn kids and their fancy text messages. Actually, I think the whole point of texting is stupid because all people seem to say is…
“how r u”
“good u”
“good lol”
“where r u”
“work ”
" "
“lol”
“lol”
“cu l8r”
“cu”
And there’s $50 right there.
-Well, the TSM chat is alright. Not many people seem to show up. I really love the fact that the Jetson's theme pops up in it. I did chat briefly with Amnesia. To anyone who wants to chat over there, I'm still giving it a shot.
-I hope you folks liked that list of hip hop songs, since it won't continue. Theres more that I do love, but it would be pointless to continue it, as I was starting to get tired of it.
-So, if he doesn't care whether or not Jimmy crack corn, why the hell is he telling us?
-"Captivity" tanked, and I'm glad. I already mentioned that I'm sick of torture flicks, and I've been waiting for more worthwhile looking horror movies. There's a new "Resident Evil" movie coming out, and after the disaster that was the second one, I'm not exactly jumping for joy. Also, I'm not excited over "I Am Legend", since it's basically one of my all time favorite stories becoming a Will Smith vehicle, written by the guy who usually writes writes Will Smith movies.
-I'm growing a goatee and moustache right now. So far, it's turning out alright, though this isn't the first time I've had one. I grew a beard last year, but ended up shaving it as it itched like a mother fucker.
-Finally, the new Interpol album, Our Love To Admire is a good album but I can't help but feel disappointed in it. It just kind of sounds like the band is treading water now.
Next time: More Metal Albums I'm enjoying
Hey its entry #200! Ya I had nothing special thought out. I've tried putting together a list of the Top 50 Oakland A's of All-Time but am never satisfied with the list when I put it together. I also tried putting together a list of the Top 100 baseball players of my baseball lifetime but that became too difficult and eventually too subjective as I made adjustments to it. So as a total cop out I decided to list the Top 50 most replied to threads in the Sports forum here at TSM which is pretty much the only forum I post in for the most part. I'd pull quotes from these threads but not even I'm not Bored enough to go through threads with thousands of posts to find something remotely funny although feel free to do it for me.
1. One & Only MLB playoff discussion thread 3616 replies
Sarted September 27, 2003 by KingPK
Most Posts: Choken One - 612
2. English Football 3483
Started June 22, 2003 by welshjerichomark
Most Posts: TheFranchise - 893
3. The Official MLB Offseason Topic 2396
Started November 9, 2003 by Bored
Most Posts: alkeiper - 448
4. Fantasy NBA League? 2264
Started October 1, 2003 by MarvinisaLunatic
Most Posts: Lightning Flik - 415
5. The OAO NBA Playoffs/Finals Thread 2145
Started April 10, 2004 by Dangerous A
Most Posts: Choken One - 203
6. And So it Begins 2132
Started October 28, 2004 by Bruiser Chong
Most Posts: alkeiper - 238
7. The one and only NHL playoffs thread 1989
Started October 6, 2003 by Urban Warfare
Most Posts: ???
8. The ALCS: New York Yankees vs. Boston Red Sox 1902
Started October 9, 2004 by The Dames
Most Posts: Anglesault - 246
9. NFL Discussion Forumtable 1870
Started November 14, 2006 by Agent of Oblivion
Most Posts: Porter - 144
10. Smartmarks Fake Baseball League 1714
Started October 18, 2003 by Evolution
Most Posts: Evolution - 553
11. Another reason why ESPN sucks 1681
Started April 13, 2006 by KingPK
Mosts Posts: Leena - 156
12. 2006-7 MLB Offseason Thread 1593
Started October 2, 2006 by Mik
Most Posts: cheech13 - 182
13. 2006 NFL Off-Season 1558
Started January 3, 2006 by FFMS
Most Posts: Carlito Brigante - 203
14. The OaO 2003-2004 NBA Thread! 1369
Started October 23, 2003 by Just J
Most Posts: alfdogg - 167
15. The 2004 Stanley Cup Playoffs thread 1317
Started April 4, 2004 by CanadianChris
Most Posts: Lightning Flik - 99
16. The Official 2003 NBA Playoffs Thread 1246
Started April 16, 2003 by Crazy Dan
Mosts Posts: ???
17. Official College Football thread 1229
Started September 2, 2003 by Vern Gagne
Most Posts: Bored - 216
18. The NFL Offseason/Pre-Draft Thread 1177
Started January 22, 2005 by MrRant
Most Posts: Vitamin X - 158
19. TSM Fantasy Baseball 2007 1150
Started January 12, 2007 by MJ Styles
Most Posts: MJ Styles - 179
20. TSM 2006 NBA Playoffs thread 1140
Started April 17, 2006 by Dangerous A
Most Posts: alfdogg - 105
21. The One & Only 2003 NFL Draft Thread 1126
Started April 25, 2003 by Flyboy
Most Posts: ???
22. The Rose Bowl Thread 1112
Started December 3, 2005 by Bored
Most Posts: Damaramu - 236
23. NBA Offseason Thread 1109
Started May 8, 2006 by Kingofthe909
Most Posts: alfdogg - 143
24. NBA Offseason News and Moves 1104
Started June 17, 2004 by NaturalBornThriller4:20
Most Posts: alfdogg - 106
25. 2006-07 MLB Offseason Thread (Part II) 1095
Started December 11, 2006 by alkeiper
Most Posts: cheech13 - 154
26. NHL 2006 Playoffs thread... 1087
Started April 17, 2006 by Carlito Brigante
Most Posts: CanadianChris - 165
27. NBA Roundtable Discussion 1056
Started December 7, 2006 by alfdogg
Most Posts: Ripper - 145
28. Head 2 Head Fantasy Baseball 2005 1026
Started February 21, 2005 by Lightning Flik
Most Posts: Lightning Flik - 205
29. NHL 2006 Off-Season... 1012
Started June 19, 2006 by Carlito Brigante
Most Posts: Kingofthe909 - 134
30. NCAA Basketball Tournament Thread 1006
Started March 17, 2005 by Slayer
Mosts Posts: Damaramu - 131
31. The OAO NHL 2003-2004 Season Thread 1003
Started December 2, 2003 by CanadianChris
Most Posts: CanadianChris - 118
32. Super Bowl XL 996
Started January 22, 2006 by CanadianChris
Most Posts: Hawk 34 - 67
33. NBA Offseason Stuff 953
Started May 31, 2005 by alfdogg
Most Posts: alfdogg - 128
34. The One and Only Divisional Playoffs thread 917
Started January 10, 2004 by CanadianChris
Most Posts: FrigidSoul - 102
35. College Hoops: NCAA Tournament Rounds 1 and 2 913
Started March 13, 2006 by SilverPhoenix
Most Posts: Leena - 100
36. 2005-2006 MLB Offseason thread 891
Started October 19, 2005 by Mik
Most Posts: FFMS - 138
37. Fantasy Football 871
Started July 7, 2003 by razazteca
Most Posts: Lightning Flik - 162
38. The Official SmartMarks Fantasy Football Thread 869
Started July 28, 2002 by The Man in Blak
Most Posts: ???
39. NBA Playoffs 2006: Conference Semifinals 867
Started May 6, 2006 by alfdogg
Most Posts: naiwf - 89
40. TSM Head-to-head FantasyBaseball League~! 841
Started February 18, 2004 by Lightning Flik
Most Posts: Lightning Flik - 216
41. TOAO NFL Week 2 Thread 813
Started September 13, 2003 by bps21
Most Post: tpww - 144
42t. Anyone up for Fantasy Football? 808
Started July 3, 2004 by LaParkaMarka
Most Posts: Lightning Flik - 151
42t. 2005-06 MLB Offseason Thread (Part II) 808
Started Decmeber 11, 2005 by alkeiper
Most Posts: alkeiper - 114
44. OAO 2004 MLB Games Thread 800
Started April 4, 2004 by HarleyQuinn
Most Posts: Anglesault - 165
45. Yankees/Twins ALDS Thread 799
Started October 5, 2004 by alkeiper
Most Posts: mike546 - 131
46. The ONE and ONLY World Series Thread 795
Started October 16, 2003 by alkeiper
Most Posts: Mik - 179
47. The 2006 NFL Draft Thread 766
Started April 28, 2006 by Gert T
Most Posts: teke184 - 100
48. World Cup 2006 in Germany 753
Started May 10, 2006 by CurryMan
Most Posts: Kingofthe909 - 75
49. The 2004 NFL Draft 749
Started April 15, 2004 by JackBauer
Most Posts: bps21 - 102
50. NBA Playoffs 722
Started April 17, 2005 by alfdogg
Most Posts: The Electrifyer - 59
5 p.m.
So the better half just called and told me I got a cell phone. Like anyone calls me on the landline. Now she'll be bitching about me never having it on, losing it or having it fall apart. Joy.
4:30 p.m.
• Just a note for all kkk Bowl participants: I should be making an announcement in the Sports thread late this month/early August. If you had a team last year, you’ll get first dibs at it again. I’m about halfway done with the score sheets and I might get motivated enough to finish it off today.
• Pity, really. I wish they would have paid an extra $6 million for covering up the action of perv priests.
Makes me wonder how many of these lawsuits are legit and how many are bullshit. Also makes me wonder why I didn't jump on the cash-wagon when I had the chance. That's right, Mrs. kkk is a Catholic. I'm a confirmed Lutheran. Drat.
• Saw the original Rollerball for the first time last night. Eh. I didn’t really like the whole “corporations take over the world” bit because I think a one-world government would have been a better fit. After all, I thought Big Corporation wanted wars, poverty and all that other good stuff. But despite my nit-pickery, it’s still a better movie than that crap which came out a few years ago under the same name.
4:30 p.m.
• This has been a somewhat-big story in my neck of the woods. This just goes to show that if some drunk driver plows into you, and your car can still run after the collision, run over the sonofabitch and killer the fucker if you have the chance. Taking a wrench to the lush's head a few times will work, too, if your car is unable to drive.
3:30 p.m.
• So the better half was reading her church’s weekly newsletter-thing and said that they’re looking for some guest family (or whatever they’re called) for some South Korean exchange student. (Sorry, Vyce, this one’s 16.) After I got my “Don’t even think about it unless you don’t want to see our cats again” remark out of the way, I had to comment that it’s amazing for someone that young to travel half-way across the world and spend a year with people you don’t know. Shit, I’m lucky to leave the house during the weekend.
• This past week had a date titled 7-11 and Friday the 13th. Weird.
6:30 p.m.
• Ha.
And you’re the one that wants the unFairness Doctrine in place to ban RIGHT-WING RADIO. Get a taste of your own medicine by having someone curtail your speech, you little shit.
• So Sidney Crosby signed a contract extension and didn’t get the biggest payday he could have.
More power to him. I’ve said before, I don’t mind athletes trying to get as much money as they can. If you’re fortunate to have your services in that high of demand, then go for the phat check. However, surely there has to come a time when the money takes a back seat to other things. At the end of his career, Crosby is going to have a shitload of money. If you were in his position, would you rather have $200 million and no Stanley Cup title or $150 million with a much better chance to give that silver trophy a smooch or two?
• David Beckham is in the hizzle.
Whatever. I have nothing against the chap. If he puts a few more butts in the seats, then yay. I doubt soccer will see a boom from this, but I’m sure if ESPN shoves this down our throats, then maybe I’m wrong. Then again, that hippie cell phone they pimped a while back didn’t quite work out for them, and those commercials got on my last nerve. While I’m on the subject of ESPN, this “Who’s Now” thing they’re doing has got to be one of the dumbest things I’ve seen this network do. When I’ve seen Jay Harris (one of the few anchors I don’t mind) talk about this gimmick I swear he’s saying to himself, “Think about the paycheck, Jay, just think about the paycheck.”
• Well no shit.
My one niece-in-law is a really big girl, and now that she’s getting into the double-digits in age, I can see that she’s getting a bit self-conscious of her waistline. Oh well.
Efforts? So calling someone “fatass” would be hate speech? Oh, and this is rich.
Notorious BIG - Suicidal Thoughts
"When I die, fuck it I wanna go to hell"
Dr. Dre/Snoop Dogg - Fuck With Dre Day
I've mentioned this song before. Hip Hop amazes me in it's homophobia: It constantly attacks on homosexuals and the gay lifestyle, yet talks more about gay sex than a gay porn director.
Grand Master Flash and the Furious 5 - The Message
A "favorite hio hop songs" list without this song? Fuck that.
A Tribe Called Quest - Jazz (We've Got)
I really love this song. It's the group in their prime, it's one of the best examples of hip hop and jazz fusing together, and the organ kicks ass. There's some great tour stories involving these guys.
"Strictly hardcore tacks/not a New Jack Swing"
Dr. Octagon - Real Raw
Dr Octagonecologyst is a great album, and this is the best song on it. It's a shame that Keith was never able to live it down (though Sex Style comes awfully close)
Mantronix - Bassline
From the first (and best) Mantronix album, this is a great example of electro hip hop.
Erik B. & Rakim - Paid in Full
The "7 Minutes of Madness" mix by Coldcut is even better.
LL Cool J - Rock the Bells
Sure, "Momma Said" is good, but it doesn't even come close to this one.
Nas - The World is Yours
Um, yeah. The best song he ever did, bar none Tell me otherwise. Come on, I dare ya.
Mobb Deep - Shook Ones Pt. II
Yep, they were good once, believe it or not. I really love the piano loop.
The Roots -Silent Treatment
Whether or not it's their best song is debatable, but it's a great song, and probably my favorite of theirs.
De La Soul - Say No Go
While De La Soul is Dead is their best album, this is their best song.
kkk’s Top 103 Posters
Number 18: Bravesfan
There’s not much to say about Bravesfan. Hell, I didn’t even bother doing some fancy intro or anything. I’ve known him for a while at this place. Years back he had some pick 'em football contest and I think it eventually drove him mad. He’s lived in Hawaii, moved to the Northwest to attend college, and that’s when I stopped keeping score. He still posts under some hippie name, but he’ll always be Bravesfan to me. God, this was a lame entry. Oh well, I still put more effort into it than he did with his most recent foray into the kkk Bowl postseason.
8:30 p.m.
• Well no shit.
Come on, illegals, invade this country. And bring a few towelheads with you. All I ask is that you blow shit up in San Fran, Berkley and Greenwich Village. Oh, and State College, too. Fuck that place.
• And this goddamn chat link at the top of the page is already getting on my nerves. I've mistakenly clicked on in four times today already.
• I might vote for Mike Huckabee in the Republican primary for thisquote alone.
Sadly, with the way Republicans have been acting, voting for someone because they made a Mikey Moore fat joke actually does seem like a good reason.
6 p.m.
• So I just took 20 minutes off of my life by going to Burger King. Hell, it's no worse than the two hours I lost due to some fagtard getting into an accident on the Parkway East this afternoon. Anyway, I tried one of their new Oreo shake things. It was there, but what gave me a hard-on was the straw it came with. Yes, the straw. Seriously, this thing is f'n HUGE. You don't have to worry about sucking on some plastic hole for 20 minutes in the hopes of getting some dairy delight. This bitch will suck up Oreo chunks like it's no problem. That's all I got.
7 a.m.
• A while back I mentioned the 1997 Pirates team that captured the heart of the city by hanging out at the top of the NL Central for most of the summer. Problem was, this was a sub-.500 team that got knocked off by a much better Astros team that decided to show up late in the season. I always found it funny that this "freak show," as it was dubbed by the Shittsburgh faithful was the most exciting time for baseball in the region since 1992. How sad is that?
Well, here's what's even sadder. The local media is doing a four-part series on this magical summer of '97. I linked the last in this series, and I'm not posting any of this shit. Go find it and read it yourself.
• Oh, no. My state's climate could be more like Alabama's if we don't get our emissions under control.
So says the UNION OF CONCERNED SCIENTISTS. Who comes up these names? I want to hear the report from the Right-to-Work State of Don't-Give-a-Fuck Scientists.
• Speaking of commie institutions, here's another one.
Bilked? Here's a wild thought. Maybe if the customers had the money in their accounts they wouldn't be subject to overdraft fees and all that other shit. Jesus Christ, what is so hard about having a little cash cushion in your bank account?
If you don't have enough money to cover a 50-cent candy bar, then you shouldn't be using your debit card in the first place. Actually, I have a funny story regarding this subject. When I was 16, I was at the mall and bought the Geto Boys' "Til' Death Do Us Part." After buying this album, I wanted a Wendy's Jr. Cheeseburger from the food court. I needed to take some money out of the ATM. I couldn't. There wasn't enough in my account to make the minimum $10 cash withdrawl. It was right then that I said to myself, "WTF, I don't even have enough for a 99-cent cheeseburger?!" (Actually, I had $8-9, but you get the point.) From that moment I've been the kkk-stein you've all know and love. Of course, if I had a debit card and used that, my 99-cent cheeseburger could have costed $30 with the draft fees, but let's just say I still would have learned my lesson. And besides, I was 16 at the time, and that is the best time to learn these financial survival skills –– not when you're an adult living on your own or trying to raise a family.
I still have that Geto Boys tape, and "Bring it On" still ownz all ur azzes.
Ice Cube - Today was a Good Day
His jimmy went so deep it put the mammy to sleep. Those are words to love.
Wu Tang Clan - Bring Tha Ruckus
Probably my favorite album opening yet, and an excellent statement of intent song. Ghost Face Killah's verse in the song is sure awesomeness.
Pharcyde - I'm That Type of Nigga
The Pharcyde's first ablum is one of my favorite hip hop albums of all time, and this song is all kinds of awesome.
Notorious B.I.G. - Warning
Let's put it to rest folks: lyrically, Biggie was always better than Tupac, and deserves more accolades than Tupac, who, let's face it, had albums filled with filler.
NWA - Straight out of Compton
I still refuse to believe Ice Cube was in "Are We There Yet?" and it's sequal.
Public Enemy - Rebel Without a Pause
My favorite PE song. Sure, Fear of a Black Planet may have more sonoc innovations, but lyrically, It Takes a Nation is superior.
GZA/Genius - Liquid Swords
It's hard to pick a best song off of the album Liquid Swords, but here's my pick. RZA's stripped sown production is top notch, and GZA is great as always.
Beastie Boys - Shake Your Rump
The best Beastie song off the best Beastie album. Slick sample ridden funk thanks to the Dust Bros., and some of the Beasties best rhymes. It's amazing that they were once good. Now they just kind of suck.
Ghostface Killah - K.I.L.O.
In spite of popular opinion, I still think that Fishscale is the best solo Wu Tang album. I absolutely love this album.
Jay-Z - Nigga What
Still my favorite Jay-Z song, with some awesome production (it's kinda spacey), an awesome beat, great chorus (Jay seems to have a way with choruses), and a great flow.
Snoop Dogg - Serial Killer
This song always gets overlooked, IMO. The beat is incredible (Dre's early production is awesome), as well as Snoop in his prime.
Justin Warfield - B-Boys on Acid
Warfield's album My Field Trip to Planet 9 is one of the most overlooked albums in 90's Hip Hop. It's a psychedelic, drug fueled, jazzy, and all around awesome album. This song captures the tone of the album perfectly.
More to come
I have been watching professional wrestling for 10 years. Yeah, I know it's fake but some of the moves that the wrestlers can perform are amazing. Plus, there is always a lot of drama and comedy, so it's entertaining.
After awhile of watching it, you start to think you know everything about the wrestlers. When the Internet was booming, so was the wrestling scene. A lot of wrestling websites were dedicated to what really happens backstage. Also, because of the Internet, people tend to like and push certain wrestlers on other people. A columnist I used to read kept pushing Chris Benoit.
Chris was a plain looking fellow, once described as a "vanilla midget". He was a really good wrestler but he didn't tall much. He just wrestled and the Internet basically ate it up. Fans in the arenas also started to take notice and he was given several promotions and belts.
After the double-murder suicide he committed, I don't feel like watching wrestling anymore. It's sad that one man's actions can ruin his entire career. Something real happened and the wrestling world continues on like everything thing is okay. It's so boring right now.
He was one of my heroes. Not anymore.
Zapp & Roger - More Bounce to the Ounce
More R&B/Funk than hip hop, but the amount of artists that have sampled it (Coolio, Compton's Most Wanted, Brotha Lynch Hung, Ice Cube, Public Enemy, Insane Clown Posse, EPMD, and many more) makes it impossible to resist, especially the awesome beat. The best use of the song as a sample source goes to EPMD's "You Got's Ta Chill" and Ice Cube'ss "Steady Mobbin'"
Public Enemy - Shut 'em Down
One of their angriest songs, with an incredibly hard hitting beat, vitrolic lyrics, and more, it's one of the groups last hurrah's before they hit mediocrity.
Wu Tang Clan - Grave Pit
Awesome rhymes, a great use of Gap Band samples, excellent chorus (I hum it to myself regularly), and we go back, and forth...
Ice Cube - Ghetto Vet
Carnival mentioned this song in the past, and it's a good one. Probably Cube's most underrated song.
Erik B. & Rakim - I Know You Got Soul
One of the early examples of using James Brown samples, it's also one of the best. Rakim may be the closest thing Hip Hop has ever had to having God on the mic, and the samples and breaks just makes it a great cut.
Man Parrish - Boogie Down Bronx
Though "Hip Hop Be Bop" is more well known (and was used to great effect in "Shaun of the Dead"), "Boogie Down Bronx" is Man Parrish's best song.
Big Daddy Kane - Ain't No Half Steppin'
"I stop and stand strong over MC’s/ And devour with the power of Hercules" That is still one of the best lines in Hip Hop history.
Afrika Bambaataa + Soul Sonic Force - Planet Rock
Yeah, so some old school hip hop has mediocre rhymes, but this is still great. Everything from the Kraftwerk sample, tot he influence the song has on Hip Hop, House, and Electro. It would be a crime not to include it.
Dr. Dre feat. Snoop Doggy Dogg - Deep Cover
While I also love "Nothin' But a G Thang", "Deep Cover" is the best Dre/Snoop collaberation.
Dr. Dre - Lyrical Gangbangs
One of the most underrated Dre songs, with a pounding, metallic snare drum beat, and maybe some of his best wok on the mic.
Don't worry, there's more to come.
10 p.m.
• So lovecraft is talking about hippie songs he likes and shit over at his blog. For some reason this gave me the urge to pop in an oldie but goldie -- Body Count's first album. You know, the one with "Cop Killer." Actually, I never really cared for that song when there's much better content on this album. Take for example the genius of these lyrics.
Not quite the same as listening to the actual album, but it's more than what I was expecting from You Tube. I think. OK, I just heard the break between the first and second verses. Forget what I said in the first sentence. My ears, bitch! Now I'm actually watching the video. The hell?
9:45 p.m.
• Forget declining memory and reasoning abilities -- how about old people just get grumpier as time goes along? I should know.
Say, that reminds me. Why don't blacks want their kids marrying Mexicans? Because they don't want their grandchildren too lazy to steal. Who says I don't understand humor comprehension?
5:15 p.m.
• So I just saw my first movie trailer for that Underdog movie. And the sad thing is this will probably make money.
3 p.m.
• Yeah, I know I’m a loser. I don’t care.
So I made some notable changes to my teams in MVP 2005. Well, I didn’t do much with the Pirates, because, well, how can you tweak utter perfection? My A, AA and AAA teams did get some face-lifts. Single-A position players with much better stats than their AAA counterparts moved up while others moved down, and over the last few days I had some interesting contests.
MLB: Edged the Rockies 1-0 thanks to a solo home run. Thank God Colorado can’t hit left-handers in this game.
AA: Was down 7-0 by the second inning, even though I had one of my best starters pitching. To make matters worse, those bastards then switched from a southpaw to a right-handed pitcher, thus screwing up my lineup, which had a few players who couldn’t hit worth shit against righties. Thanks to a five-run ninth, I rallied and won 9-8. Because I called up several players, I needed a right fielder and signed one via free agency. This guy went 3-4 in this game with 4 RBI.
A: This team was a regular mash-fest, which is why I called up several players to AA and AAA teams. I had some trouble scoring early on, but I managed to tie this contest and we went into extra innings – eight of them to be exact. And the funny thing is, my worst relief pitcher threw five scoreless innings.
I’ll probably play my AAA team sometime this week. God only knows what’s going to happen with this bunch.
• I sure can’t wait to see how I got fucked over with this new budget deal.
Crap. That's never a good sign whenever both sides claim victory.
So Fast Eddie is probably going to spend more on stupid shit, and he’s not raising taxes … yet. That’s not a victory you Republican shitheads. You know what this reminds me of? Years ago a group of us were trick-or-treating, and these kids came up to one in our group and surrounded him demanding candy. Much like animals in the wild, we cut our losses with the weak link and moved on. A few houses later, we were approached by the kid we abandoned, and he said to us, “I showed them. They each wanted five candy from me and I only gave them three.” Yeah, you showed them.
Good job Republicans. You state pols are just as bad as the Democrats. Then again, fuck the constituents. They deserve to get screwed. Oh, and listen to this furloughed worker.
You were off for a DAY! And I read in the local paper about someone bitching about this because many state workers live paycheck to paycheck. Well whose fucking fault is that?
It's the All-Star Break so might as well give out some mideason awards. I honestly haven't paid much attention to the Cy Young or Rookie of the Year races this year and when I did I realized I made a mistake on my last MVP Watch.
National League Midseason Awards
Starting of course with the MVP, since my last MVP Watch was just 10 days there isn't going to be much change. But there was a major change on the N.L. side as after dropping out of the Top 10 last time in this short span Hanley Ramirez has been on fire and makes a huge jump back into the race which also goes to show you how wide open the N.L. race is. To go along with Miguel Cabrera it is amazing that a team that his five games under .500 has two legit MVP candidates going into the break but neither has prayer for the writer's award if the Marlins don't make a second half run. The other major change was after looking at the Cy Young race I decided I overrated Brad Penny last time around so he's out of the Top 10. Other than that very little change, Chase Utley holds the top spot going into the break, Barry Bonds is slowly moving back up the rankings, and Prince Fielder continues to slowly move down the rankings. I'm going to start losing faith in Win Shares though if it continues to think Eric Byrnes has been the MVP on the N.L.
10. Edgar Renteria, Braves
.319/.384/.481, 63 RC, 130 OPS+, .304 EQA, 32.7 VORP, 15.6 Win Shares
9. Albert Pujols, Cardinals
.310/.411/.516, 61 RC, 146 OPS+, .319 EQA, 28.6 VORP, 16.3 Win Shares
8. Eric Byrnes, Diamondbacks
.306/.363/.496, 60 RC, 119 OPS+, .288 EQA, 25.4 VORP, 17.8 Win Shares
7. Russell Martin, Dodgers
.306/.374/.492, 60 RC, 125 OPS+, .300 EQA, 32.1 VORP, 17.0 Win Shares
6. Prince Fielder, Brewers
.284/.376/.620, 64 RC, 158 OPS+, .321 EQA, 35.5 VORP, 14.8 Win Shares
5. Jose Reyes, Mets
.307/.387/.439, 65 RC, 123 OPS+, .299 EQA, 35.2 VORP, 16.8 Win Shares
4. Barry Bonds, Giants
.295/.512/.589, 64 RC, 191 OPS+, .379 EQA, 41.6 VORP, 15.7 Win Shares
3. Hanley Ramirez, Marlins
.331/.388/.538, 68 RC, 148 OPS+, .318 EQA, 45.1 VORP, 16.0 Win Shares
2. Miguel Cabrera, Marlins
.324/.393/.576, 70 RC, 158 OPS+, .327 EQA, 39.5 VORP, 16.9 Win Shares
1. Chase Utley, Phillies
.325/.401/.571, 69 RC, 151 OPS+, .322 EQA, 42.7 VORP, 17.4 Win Shares
On to N.L. Cy Young, even though it is a close race it is hard to go against Jake Peavy at the moment. This was a really easy list to come up with as there's big drop off after the Top 3. Note Win Shares listed are pitching only.
3. Chris Young, Padres
202 ERA+, 2.75 K/BB, 1.06 WHIP, 35.6 VORP, 11.1 Win Shares
2. Brad Penny, Dodgers
183 ERA+, 2.42 K/BB, 1.19 WHIP, 41.7 VORP, 14.2 Win Shares
1. Jake Peavy, Padres
184 ERA+, 3.68 K/BB, 1.06 WHIP, 42.7 VORP, 12.6 Win Shares
N.L. Rookie of the Year is probably the easiest race to pick a winner at the moment as Hunter Pence is dusting the field. The question right now is if Ryan Braun got too late of the start to make a serious run but he takes the #2 spot despite having only 179 plate appearances. I went with Troy Tulowitzki over Josh Hamilton for the last spot simply due to Tulowitzki being really the only every day rookie in the N.L. since Opening Day and playing a pretty good shortstop for the Rockies.
3. Troy Tulowitzki, Rockies
.286/.358/.432, 40 RC, 103 OPS+, .268 EQA, 14.3 VORP, 10.1 Win Shares
2. Ryan Braun, Brewers
.350/.391/.663, 39 RC, 173 OPS+, .341 EQA, 27.2 VORP, 10.4 Win Shares
1. Hunter Pence, Astros
.342/.367/.589, 49 RC, 146 OPS+, .313 EQA, 30.7 VORP, 11.7 Win Shares
AMERICAN LEAGUE MIDSEASON AWARDS
Hardly any change at all from 10 days ago beyond dropping Dan Haren out of the Top 10. It continues to very much be a four player race but I still think there's little chance Magglio Ordonez holds down the top spot at the end of the year but I've yet not have him at #1.
10. Orlando Cabrera, Angels
.328/.366/.444, 58 RC, 118 OPS+, .282 EQA, 29.0 VORP, 18.4 Win Shares
9. Derek Jeter, Yankees
.336/.408/.463, 71 RC, 136 OPS+, .294 EQA, 33.4 VORP, 15.5 Win Shares
8. Gary Sheffield, Tigers
.303/.410/.560, 74 RC, 155 OPS+, .320 EQA, 38.2 VORP, 15.3 Win Shares
7. David Ortiz, Red Sox
.314/.434/.556, 65 RC, 159 OPS+, .323 EQA, 38.5 VORP, 13.9 Win Shares
6. Grady Sizemore, Indians
.280/.393/.471, 72 RC, 131 OPS+, .301 EQA, 35.8 VORP, 18.6 Win Shares
5. Victor Martinez, Indians
.324/.382/.553, 68 RC, 148 OPS+, .309 EQA, 38.7 VORP, 19.9 Win Shares
4. Ichiro Suzuki, Mariners
.359/.410/.459, 77 RC, 137 OPS+, .311 EQA, 44.0 VORP, 21.1 Win Shares
3. Vladmir Guerrero, Angels
.325/.416/.547, 75 RC, 158 OPS+, .321 EQA, 39.6 VORP, 21.6 Win Shares
2. Alex Rodriguez, Yankees
.317/.413/.665, 86 RC, 186 OPS+, .341 EQA, 54.5 VORP, 18.8 Win Shares
1. Magglio Ordonez, Tigers
.367/.446/.604, 84 RC, 177 OPS+, .346 EQA, 52.6 VORP, 20.0 Win Shares
For A.L. Cy Young Dan Haren is the easy choice for now but he's starting to comeback down to earth and in the end it will probably be once again Johan Santana's award to lose. One thing of note for both leagues with the whining by the media last year with their being no 20 game winners the writers will be falling over themselves to give the award to a 20 game winner this time around even if there are clearly better pitchers out there (C.C. Sabathia I'm looking at you).
3. Mark Buehrle, White Sox
149 ERA+, 3.18 K/BB, 1.10 WHIP, 34.7 VORP, 12.6 Win Shares
2. Johan Santana, Twins
161 ERA+, 4.17 K/BB, 1.03 WHIP, 38.0 VORP, 11.8 Win Shares
1. Dan Haren, A's
191 ERA+, 3.16 K/BB, 1.00 WHIP, 43.2 VORP, 14.1 Win Shares
Now for some CONTROVERSY~! Well not for the top spot as I think Jeremy Guthrie is clear choice for Rookie of the Year in the A.L. at the moment. But as you'll see there is no Daisuke Matsuzaka or Hideki Okajima on the list. I've said it before and I'll say it again, veteran players from Japan are not true rookies and should not be eligible for the ROY. That's just my opinion and right or wrong it isn't going to change.
3. Reggie Willits, Angels
.312/.408/.368, 40 RC, 113 OPS+, .288 EQA, 15.8 VORP, 9.8 Win Shares
2. Dustin Pedroia, Red Sox
.318/.400/.450, 43 RC, 124 OPS+, .287 EQA, 19.9 VORP, 11.4 Win Shares
1. Jeremy Guthrie, Orioles
159 ERA+, 4.00 K/BB, 0.91 WHIP, 32.5 VORP, 9.8 Win Shares
8 p.m.
• LOL Mikey Moore.
That joke writes itself. And he wants media outlets to tell the truth? While we’re on this subject, how exactly is universal health care “free”?
Wait a second, Mikey just said at the end that he doesn’t do taped interviews that can be edited. Oh that’s funny.
• So today I heard on several ESPN shows that one of the big stories of this All-Star Weekend, err, day or two, is Barry Bonds not participating in tonight’s home-run contest. “OMG he owes it to the people in San Francisco fans for their years of blind loyalty,” “OMG he is finally getting into the good graces of the world and he’s ruining it,” “OMG he’s turned his back on the fans yet again.”
Look, I can’t stand Bonds, but he can do whatever the hell he wants – and many times he does just that. Besides, I thought Major League Baseball wanted to distance itself from the roid age? Wouldn’t have The Forehead taking his cuts at Pac Bell Whatever it’s Called Ball Park do just that. Listening to the national sports media tell Bonds what he should do to enhance his image is like having a N.Y. Times columnist give advice to the GOP on what Republicans should do in order to win the next election.
• While on the subject of baseball, for those that like this sort of thing:
• OMG FAUX NEWS LOL20… uh, ah screw it. I’m too lazy right now to think up a nickname for the BBC.
• Damn you global warming.
Of course, this is now why we’re referring to this as “climate change.” That way, they don’t have to worry about the earth getting hot or cold.
• N*gga plz.
If they really wanted to make an impact, they would have hung this mean word from a tree or put it on a burning, wodden, lower-case "t" indicating that it's time for this word to leave.
-Live Earth sucked. Aside from a few good performances (Roger Waters, Metallica, Crowded Houses, & Duran Duran), it was largely dull. The Police were horrible, Yellow Magic Orchestra (think Kraftwerk, only Japanese and a bit more lighthearted) were dull and their set was too short, Al Gore looked more like Darrell Hammond playing Al Gore than the actual thing, and well, it sucked.
-If you haven't seen "Children of Men" yet, go rent it. It's one of the best movies of last year, and it has an awesome soundtrack. That out of the way, avoid "The Fountain", which aside from an excellent score, is really boring and pretentious.
-Transformers is the top movie in America (bet yer suprised), and as I already mentioned, is a blast. It's amazing that out of all the huge budget blockbusters, this one is the best. "Spider Man 3" was a dissapointment, "POTC 3' is pretty much milking the franchise for all it's worth, and I'd rather stuck my nuts in a vice than watch "Shrek 3" again. Besides, "28 Weeks Later" was the best sequal of the summer so far.
-Finally, how stupid can hippies be?
In the following days, look for:
A sequal to the Metal albums thread
Some of my favorite hip hop songs
7 p.m.
• Poor Katie.
Ha, that "free speech" thing they started out with died. That's funny. Wait, dressing down for less criticism? Wouldn't it be the other way? Oh well. I'm glad the whole thing is going to shit.
• Well at least we know this wasn't a lover's quarrell.
9:30 a.m.
• Christ, the house was just cleaned on Friday and now Max, who is a longhair, is starting to leave his signature card all over the floor. Oh well, nothing he can do about it; cat’s gotta shed. Besides, he’s so darn adorable.
Of course, the clumps of fur could also be spots where he wrestled with JJ while I was sleeping. It’s actually quite amusing to see. As I have said before, JJ is actually a rather powerful cat, but this strength is wrapped up in a package of cowardice. He’ll run up to Max and made this gesture that he wants to wrestle and they’ll go at it for about five seconds until JJ jumps up and runs away. And JJ always likes to be the one on the bottom. Go figure.
11 p.m.
• Haven’t paid attention to the hippie Save-the-Planet concerts, but I figured someone would bring this up:
But that’s OK. Because it’s all for a good cause.
You know, Al, instead of holding hippie concerts to tell us all how to live our lives, I think your time would be better served answering your critics.
• This was also on Drudge, but what's better than the actual article...
...was the in the comment section after the article. El Duderino, my n*gga.
No, they don't have anything better to do. Dealing with domestic Islamic terrorists is one of the worst things you can do to a Muslim male.
2:30 p.m.
• So I went to bed at 3 a.m. after watching that Insomniac special hosted by David Attell. Wasn’t too bad, actually. I’d rank the performances as Giraldo, Attell, Rouse and … ugh … Cook. What is the big deal behind this guy? I’ve seen two performances from him and I think I’ve only chuckled once, maybe twice – but that was because two of my cats were wrestling in front of the television at the time. Anyway, I went to bed and woke up at 1:30 p.m. today: a ten-and-a-half hour nap. Haven’t had one of those in a while. It brought back memories when I was living in Sappy Valley.
I lived at that shithole from January ’99 through August of ’00, and for my last several months I had an apartment to myself. The future Mrs. kkk went back home after she graduated from Penn State to work for a few months, and I stayed because I had steady work and it was easier to do that than go back to the Shittsburgh region, look for work for three months, and them move again to Ohio, which is where we were headed for that August. I worked 60+ hours/7 days per week, and there were several days when I put in 12+ hour shifts. There were some days when I got in and slept for 17 hours straight. And it was great. Christ, when you awaken from one of those slumbers you feel like you’re ready to take on the world.
Oh, yeah. Here was my Friday night. The test-tube welfare family I have talked about in the past stopped over for the first time to get our old screen door for their casa. And they brought their two test-tube kids. Gag. I’m sorry. I do not like these people. It mostly stems from the fact they purposely had two kids via artificial insemination when they do not have the money for this. Many people would feel bad for a family of four if they collected welfare because the dad and mom got laid off from their job, or an accident/illness befell one of them. However, these two people were on the public dole BEFORE heading off to the sperm clinic. (Note: Due to the seach function seemingly being out of order, I can't link up previous entries talking about these people to give some background info to any n00bs reading.)
Anyway, it was funny to see their reaction to our house because they were AMAZED at how nice it was. Yes, these people own a HOUSE. A house, which I learned last night, needs ductwork because the previous owner built new shitty walls to cover up the shittier walls from prospective buyers. Oh, yeah. The previous buyer didn’t install any new ventilation ducts to allow the hot air from circulating throughout the house; basically, the hot air just stayed in-between the two walls. The test-tube family didn’t realize this and just kept turning up the heat this past winter, resulting one month in a $700 bill, which I’m sure the taxpayers footed the bill for. Their house also has, according to the better half, uneven floors that allow someone to roll objects from tables and countertops with no effort. There were a few other fix-em-ups that this piece of property needs, but I can’t remember what they were. I guess those $300 mortgage payments (which they are several months behind on) proves the adage, “you get what you pay for.”
So as I sat there listening to them talking about how the matriarch of this family can’t work more than two days per week or else they wouldn’t be able to get welfare, I was doing everything I can to not include any commentary of my own. What job does this person work? She cleans her aunt’s house (the aunt whose house I attend every Memorial Day for that annual family cookout), and by “cleans” I mean “sits down all day and watches television with the rest of the public assistance leeches.” Then I heard that they were thinking about bringing a THIRD human being into this world. Oh hell no. Keep watching the Braves game, which was on to keep their kids somewhat distracted, and this will be all over with soon enough. WTF? The White Sox game was 20-14? Back to reality, the younger of the two kids says, something that struck fear into me.
“Daddy, I went poopie.”
OH HELL NO! With as droopy as that diaper of hers is, you get that brat out of this house. Sure my three cats will launch the occasional turd from one of their litter boxes and bat it around on the floor, and Dessa will infrequently pee on the carpet sometimes just to be a bitch, but they're cats. And, more importantly, they're my cats and are much less maintenance overall than a fledging human being. When these people finally left, with the screen door tied down to the top of their car and the glass part placed in the back seat (which is where their two kids were also sitting), I grabbed the can of Oust from the bathroom and started spraying the living room. Mrs. kkk and I then exchanged the following words. Figure out who said what yourself.
“What are you doing?”
“Getting the ‘poor people’ smell out of our house.”
“That is so not right.”
“Then why are you laughing?”
I attended the Mariners/A's game last night. On paper it seemed like a very favorable match-up with Dan Haren pitching for the A's against Jeff Weaver of the Mariners. Haren didn't have it last night, and he really hasn't had it for the last few weeks, but through six innings he had only given up one run mainly due to the Mariners over agressive hitting. He'd thrown 99 pitches to that point and I thought it'd be a good idea to get the hook instead of pressing their luck especially with scored tied 1-1. But manager Bob Geren did press his luck and got the whammy as Jose Vidro would hit a two run double to give the Mariners a 3-1 lead to finally knock Haren out of the game, the Mariners eventually going on to win 7-1. Now this was not the worst game I've ever been to from the standpoint of a heartbreaking loss (that would be this game) but it was one of the worst games I've ever been to from the quality of play by the A's. The A's committed five errors with Marco Scutaro tying an American League record with four errors in one game by a third baseman. Hey I saw history! So for this brief entry I give a brief list of some of the worst performances by the A's that I've seen live in person. The list is brief is I'm doing this off the top of my head and my memories of individual games as a kid aren't particularly good which I'll chalk up to having a short attention span.
June 21, 1987 vs. Texas. Now see talking of not having a good memory, I can't 100% vouch for that I went to this game but it was the second game of a double header and I have an early baseball memory of being at a double header against the Rangers with the A's getting blown out so odds are it was this game. A's lost 13-3 and some guy named Bob Brower for the Rangers hit two homeruns. Ron Cey DH'd for the A's that day. God I feel old.
June 30, 1997 vs. San Diego. The A's hit rock bottom as a franchise in 1997 and this game was pretty much how the season went. The Padres scored seven runs in the 2nd inning, featuring two three-run homeruns by Wally Joyner and Tony Gwynn off starter Don Wengert. He was replaced by Dan Johnson who I thought was good at the time because he had a 2.08 ERA. Not really grasping the idea of sample sizes at that point, he'd only pitched 13 innings so far that season, I would be very dissapointed as he would give up six runs of his own including a two run homerun to Greg Vaughn in the 4th. It was 11-3 at the end of the 4th, 15-5 at the end of the 6th, with the Padres clinging to a 15-6 win.
October 1, 2004 vs. Anaheim. This was an awful game and it was a heartbreaker. It was the first game of the final series of the year and the A's were one game out of first place behind the Angels. Mark Mulder made the start despite having a horrific last two months of the season and clearly needed to be skipped in the rotation for rookie Joe Blanton. Mulder would get hooked after surrendering four runs in the 2nd. Blanton would shadow him and kept the A's in it until the 6th when the Angels figured him out and Alfredo Amezaga (who hit .161/.212/.247 in 93 at bats that year) hit a grand slam to make it 8-0, eventually skunking the A's 10-0. And it was my birthday. Angels clinched the division the next day.
5:15 p.m.
• So let me get this right. I drive home from work. Now garbage pick up for me is Friday. Today is Friday. However, there are several holidays that, if they fall on a weekday, pushes back garbage collection back a day. One of these holidays is Independence Day. This means my garbage pick up is Saturday. This morning when driving to work, I noticed several houses on my street with their trash out. When I got back from work, the cans were there, but the garbage wasn’t. Hmmm. To solve this groovy mystery I called up the garbage company.
Me: Good afternoon, I was calling because I was wondering if there was a trash collection along 666 kkk Street?
Them: What day is your pick up?
Me: Today, but with this week featuring Independence Day, and this holiday listed on your card saying which holidays move back collection, I was double-checking.
Them: You collection will be tomorrow, that’s right.
Me: OK. The reason I called was that when I left for work several houses along my street had their trash out, and when I returned home the cans were still there but the trash was gone.
Them: That’s right. They left their garbage up to be collected.
Me: But you just said collection will be tomorrow.
Them: That’s right.
Me: Huh?
Them: We collect it both days. It’s easier that way.
Me: Uh, OK.
So in order to make it easier for the trash collectors, they have to drive two routes for two days to collect garbage from neighborhoods that are told not to put out their trash until a day later than normal? Well if it works for Waste Management, then it works for me. I always wondered how they dealt with holidays.
12:45 p.m.
• Whew. I'm glad Burger King is getting rid of those dangerous trans-fats. Now I can eat my triple whopper with cheese value meal without fear of it being bad for me.
• Remember yesterday's entry when I said my trip to the zoo was blocked off by a parade? It wasn't.
I guess I should feel bad and ponder my own existence in this crazy world, but I don't. Hey, you didn't have to hear the better half bitch about not being able to see the tiger cubs on the drive home.
• I wonder if you get an STD from this if you can claim workman's comp, or whatever they do over there.
