44.) Pink Floyd-The Final Cut
Technically, it's not really a Pink Floyd album when you think about it. It's really more of a Roger Waters solo album. It still sucks though. I can understand Water's anger and sadness in the album (He did lose his father to WW II) but politically, it's incredibly preachy. Musically, it's adventerous, but doesn't work out in the end, and it covers material he covered in th past-and did a better job of covering.
43.) A Perfect Circle-eMotive
How do you fail to make a political message? Do what APC did, and do a series of dreadful cover songs. Turning What's Goin' On? into a shitty industrial rock song, ruining Black Flag's Gimme Gimmie Gimmie, turning Lennon's Imagine into a dreadful Goth Rock cover that would embaress even Marylin Manson (who's done his share of shitty covers)-the list just goes on. Look, I hate Bush too, but this may be the worst anti-Bush album ever recorded, and that says something. Especially when that album ends up being worse than Limp Bizkit's attempt at Bush bashing. Seriously, fuck you Maynard.
42.) Roger Waters-Radio K.A.O.S.
I don't know what's sadder-that Roger Waters left Pink Floyd, or that David Gilmour has done better solo albums than Waters. This 1987 shitastrophe is a concept album about a wheelchair-bound boy who tries to stop Nuclear War through his handy-dandy HAM radio. At this point, Waters hatred of war has reached levels of self-parody, and the whole album itself is so bad its hilarious-thanks especially in part to the involvement of the Radio DJ. A better title could have been "Hey, Roger Waters is trying to make a statement-again. What else could I listen to..."
A.L. West Finals: (12) 1988 Minnesota Twins vs. (6) 1983 Chicago White Sox
Game 1: Twins 6, White Sox 5
Tim Laudner hit a grand slam in the 6th off LaMarr Hoyt. White Sox had the tying and winning runs on in the 9th but Jeff Reardon held them off.
Game 2: Twins 15, White Sox 4
Every Twins starter scored at least one run as they crushed Floyd Bannister and the White Sox bullpen. Dan Gladden led the way going 3 for 5 with a homerun.
Game 3: White Sox 3, Twins 2
Richard Dotson allowed just one earned run in 7 2/3 innings as the Sox steal a win back in the Metrodome.
Game 4: Twins 7, White Sox 5
Twins escaped to take a 3-1 series lead as the Sox nearly made a miraculous comeback from being down 7-0 in the 9th.
Game 5: Twins 5, White Sox 4 10 innings
Twins wrap up the series on a walk off….ground out. With John Moses on 3rd, Gladden hit a chopper to Scott Fletcher and he was unable to throw Moses out at the plate. Kirby Puckett was 3 for 4 with a homerun.
Twins win series 4 games to 1
A.L. West All-Region Team
C: Tim Laudner, '88 Twins
1B: Kent Hrbek, '88 Twins
2B: Tom Herr, '88 Twins
3B: Gary Gaetti, '88 Twins
SS: Dick Schofield, '86 Angels
LF: Dan Gladden, '88 Twins
CF: Rudy Law, '83 White Sox
RF: Harold Baines, '83 White Sox
SP: Frank Viola, '88 Twins
RP: Jeff Reardon, '88 Twins
Region MVP: Gary Gaetti, .365/.402/.667, 96 AB, 20 R, 35 H, 4 2B, 2 3B, 7 HR, 23 RBI
A.L. East Finals: (13) 1987 Toronto Blue Jays vs. (6) 1980 New York Yankees
Game 1: Yankees 3, Blue Jays 2
An Eric Sodherholm rbi single in the bottom of the 8th broke up a 2-2 tie.
Game 2: Blue Jays 3, Yankees 2
Lloyd Moseby hit a two out, rbi double in the top of the 9th for the winning run. Jim Clancy got the complete game victory.
Game 3: Blue Jays 6, Yankees 2
Jesse Barfield was 2 for 3 with a homerun and Dave Stieb allowed just one earned run on four hits in seven innings. The ’80 Yankees now trail in a series for the first time in the tournament.
Game 4: Blue Jays 3, Yankees 2 11 innings
Willie Randolph booted a groundball with two out in the 11th and then Ron Davis uncorked a wild pitch to score George Bell from third for the winning run.
Game 5: Yankees 7, Blue Jays 6 10 innings
Randolph drew a bases loaded walk from Jeff Musselman in the 10th to force in the eventual winning run and the keep the Yankees alive.
Game 6: Yankees 3, Blue Jays 1
Gaylord Perry and Goose Gossage hold the Jays to five hits to help force a Game 7.
Game 7: Yankees 3, Blue Jays 2
Davis pitched three scoreless innings in relief and Reggie Jackson hit his 12th homerun of the tournament as the Yankees complete the series comeback and now put three teams from 1980 into the Final Four.
Yankees win series 4 games to 3
A.L. East All-Region Team
C: Rick Cerone, '80 Yankees
1B: Don Mattingly, '85 Yankees
2B: Willie Randolph, '80 Yankees
3B: Graig Nettles, '80 Yankees
SS: Tony Fernandez, '87 Blue Jays
LF: George Bell, '87 Blue Jays
CF: Lloyd Moseby, '87 Blue Jays
RF: Reggie Jackson, '80 Yankees
SP: Tommy John, '80 Yankees
RP: Goose Gossage, '80 Yankees
Region MVP: Reggie Jackson, .350/.441/.825, 80 AB, 20 R, 28 H, 2 2B, 12 HR, 19 RBI, 13 BB
So there you have it, three teams from 1980 into the Final Four. The '80 Yankees aren't a huge shock as they won 103 games that year but laid an egg in the ALCS. Didn't see the other three teams getting in though.
Final Four: A.L. Finals
'88 Twins vs. '80 Yankees
Up Next: Final Four: League Finals
7:15 p.m.
• For the last few weeks, I’ve been on a “Cops” kick. I guess because the white-trash tales regarding the crackwhore sister-in-law and her out-of-control daughter have recently come to a halt, I need to go elsewhere for my fix. I remember years ago this comedian had a bit about someone he knew that watched this show and tried to guess the race of the perp before he or she showed up on television. Sadly, that’s what I’m doing now, and I’m pretty good at it. In fact, I now have to add another twist to this game: if the perp is white, will he (or she!) be wearing a shirt? And if the perp is black, I try to understand at least half of what the crack head/car thief/druggie says during his 15 minutes of fame on television. And just why am I watching this show? About 45 minutes ago I got done viewing an episode where two girls in a trailer park got into a fight. According to the witnesses, one parent watched the scuffle. But when the other kid’s parent came out to see what was going on, Parent 1 (allegedly) threw a beer at Parent 2. As the po-pos were trying to figure out what was going on, they spoke with Parent 2, who admitted to letting her kid punch the other kid, saying, “This is a trailer park. It’s what they do.”
Oh, but it got better. The next segment had two cops pull up to a house where a 7-year-old locked his mom out of their residence. To make matters better, this brat was making faces by the window when the officers were telling him to let his mom back in the house. The cops eventually broke the front door and the kid hid under a bed. Once he was dragged out to the living, he began screaming and crying. He was also in nothing but his underwear.
• For as much as I hate mowing the lawn, there is one thing I despise more. Raking leaves. There is a tree in my backyard that dumps its load every November/December and I have to rake this shit up. Last year I was waiting for this annual ritual to begin, and of course the day in which all the leaves end up on the ground the better half and I were in the midst of a flu bout. Once I got over this sickness, I slept on my back in an odd way and woke up one morning with so much pain I couldn’t bend over. After a week or two when this condition went away it began to constantly rain or snow. I figured I’ll just rake this shit up come spring. It couldn’t be that bad, right? Wrong. Over the last last two days I’ve done four full leaf bags of these dried-up pieces of shit and I got a few good bags left scattered on my property. God only knows what the neighbors think because I’m sure some of my mess went onto their yard. Then again, they really don’t do much in the realm of lawn preservation, so I’m sure any “outrage” directed at me would be just for show. However, it’s the principle of it all, and I do feel like a schmuck about this mishap. Let’s just say lesson learned. I could have cancer with tubes sticking out of every body part and I’ll still rake these leaves once they fall from that damn tree.
• The MLB season hasn't even started yet and I have to listen to this shit already.
OK, time to play “Who is more diverse?” Is it the league with
60 percent of one race
29 percent of another race
8.5 percent of another race, and
2.5 percent of another;
Or is it the league with
77 percent of one race
21 percent of another race, and
2 percent of other races;
Or is it the league with
69 percent of one race, and
31 percent of another race, plus probably a percentage or two of other races.
If you guessed the first sport, you would be selecting Major League Baseball. Sport number two is the NBA, and sport number three is the NFL. So while the PC bitches at ESPN and other national sports media figureheads gnaw on their fingernails trying to figure out how to bring more black people into America’s National Pastime, I’m doing my best to get more of “my people” those valued starting NFL cornerback slots. But I’ll throw MLB a bone on this one. You want more blacks in your game? Promote the fact being able to steal in your contests is a good thing.
-Before we get back to the countdown, Here's Karl Rove setting white people back. Word. I never thought I'd say it, but poor Karl Rove...
Now, thw countdown countinues
47.) Neil Young-Landing on Water
I love Neil Young. Hell, who doesn't? That out of the way, nobody loves this album. Here, Neil tries to mix the style of his band Crazy Horse with modern music styles-and it all falls apart. The album is incredibly dated, and I'm sorry Neil, but loud 80's Drums don't fit you. The whole album is hard to listen to (yes, even harder than Eveybody's Rockin', though that ones forgivable for the fact that Young was intentionally trying to piss off Geffen.)
46.) Hammer-The Funky Headhunter
Let's face it, while it's hard to take him seriously, you can't deny that guys like MC Hammer helped Hip-Hop crossover to the pop mainstream. When he tried to reinvent himself as a Gangsta rapper, you can guess how well that turned out. Sure, "Pumps and a Bump" may be one of the great idiotic Rap tunes, but the whole album is laughably bad because he actually tries to pull this off without a single hint of irony. Think about this: the guy who had a Saturday Morning cartoon tried to come off as a hardcore rapper. Cool album title though...
45.) The Rolling Stones-Dirty Work
Just like Neil Young a year earlier, The Rolling Stones try to fit in with the times-and fail. The Rolling Stones with synthesized production? No. Also, the band sounds bored, especially Jagger, who sounds like he doesn't know why he's doing this. Even Tom Waits, or as Incandenza likes to call him, God, can't save the album with his appearence. Oh, and the album cover is one of the worst album covers ever made.
I said I was going to start a countdown of the 50 Worst Albums of all time, so well, lets start
50.) The new Insane Clown Posse Album.
I never liked Insane Clown Posse. I always found them a lame gimmick, and their music never did anything for me. The reason I included this one is because of the comments from Carnival, whi is a fan of there's who I think is a pretty cool guy, and is one of my favorite posters. He says that the new album is "The worst thing he's ever heard" and that "If it was a tumor, it wouldn't grow on him." Wow. Anyways, I'd like to thank him for these comments. I'm not sure if they are the exact words (I deleted them on accident-really sorry, though it is amazingly appreciated. You don't need to send them back though, since your words are appreciated) but still...
49.) Boston-Corporate America
Brad Delp commited suicide recently, and he'll definately be missed. The first Boston album is a classic, and still warrents a listen. Hell, everyone but the biggest indie-rock snob likes that album. Their last album though, is a real suckfactory. Everything in it sounds recycled, and the arena rock riffs sound tired instead of fun, and Delp sounds bored. Also, what the hell is with the song "With You", which doesn't even have Delp? Bullshit. Lamest of all, is one of the best selling arena rock gods of all time bemoaning corporate America. Yes, the same corporate America that helped them turn them into best selling sensations. Oh, and it promotes vegetarianism, rips on modern living, and attacks SUV's and DVD's. I rest my case. Cool album cover though.
48.) Coil-Constant shallowness Leads To Evil
I love Coil. Love's Secret Domain, Horse Rotorvator, and the Musick to Play in the Dark albums are classics in electronic music. This 2000 album though, sees them taking on noise, While I like noise, and I like what they were aiming for here (a tribute to everything from La Monte Young to Krautrock to early Butthole Surfers), the end result falls on it's face. It all sounds dull and pretentious, and actually forgets what made the artists that influenced the album so great in the first place. Saddest of all is frontman John Balance, who's just treading the same water he has in the past. In the end, what we get is the worst album in their discography, and one of the worst electronic albums of the new millenium, or at least so far.
6:45 p.m.
• Oh you got to be kidding me. ESPN has Racist Dusty as a commentator? I just saw him on SportsCenter talking about the NL East. Oddly enough, Racist Dusty didn’t mention which teams will start out the season fast but finish slow in those chilly September nights due to a plethora of black players on their roster.
• I can't wait to hear Circuit City bitch a year from now about how they can't find any good workers.
If you’ve read my blog or posts for any length of time, chances are you know my opinion toward unions, "worker's rights" and all that other hippie shit, but whenever I read stuff like this, I get irked. Then again, in a free market, you always have to be on the go and ready to change jobs; staying at a place for 30 years is a thing of the past. Kind of a shame, really, but it’s a fact of life. Great, now I’m sounding like a commie. I need to change the subject … stat.
• Much better.
9 a.m.
• I'm a cat person, but I got to admit that there's no way any of my three would be able to pull this off.
7 a.m.
• So I just heard on the news that Fast Eddie's attempt to jack up the state cigarette tax an extra dime is approved by voters in a poll by a count of 54 to 46 percent. Now I don’t smoke and I don’t care about those that do. However, I do have a soft spot for smokers if only because I treat them like disposable front-line infantrymen (and women) in the war on the State taxing its constituents. If smoking ever gets banned, or taxed to the point where not enough people won't purchase the product, then Big Brother will go and tax up the wazoo something else – perhaps something I like. Well anyway, I heard in this news blurb that the dime increase will make PA’s tax on a pack of smokes $1.45. And we bitch about BIG OIL for price gouging? Yikes.
• I’ve been rooting for the Penguins and their mid-season surge to the NHL playoffs, if only because I hope it reminds people that Fast Eddie and Shittsburgh did jack shit to keep them here (yet our local leaders bent over backwards for the Pirates when they were in "danger" of leaving town). Last night they clinched a postseason spot. Uh, yay and stuff. I normally don’t watch the Penguins on television for a full game. If I’m putting away groceries or channel surfing and a game is being televised, I’ll keep it on depending on my mood. Well last night I had the start of the game on against the Washington Capitals while I got back from the grocery store. Every time I have a Penguins game on at the start of the contest they stink up the arena, and last night was no exception as Washington got off to a 2-0 lead. I changed channels for a few hours and came back to the game. What was the score when I returned to the game? 4-2 Pens.
The game's going on as I write this, so some of my opinions that I type before the end will stay unedited, and be commented on later in the entry.
Kobe's only got 18 points on 6 of 24 shooting, but it's ok because he can't be Superman every night. Kwame got rested because the hamstring was acting up, so Bynum got the start tonight.
Gotta post this now before it changes, as it's the weirdest shit I've ever seen.
The number is minutes played, and honest to God, as a lifelong basketball fan, I have never heard of anyone named Kinsey in my life. What the fuck did this guy do to earn 41 minutes. The fact that he's got 24 points makes it even worse. I just read that he went to South Carolina. Still haven't heard of him. The fact that Junior Harrington's had 45 minutes of run in this game makes me laugh even harder. Shammond Williams is starting to get more minutes, so Smush better take heed and start playing better. Here's a nice statline, Lamar Odom's got 3 points, 16 boards and 11 assists. That's the ugliest double-double I've ever seen. This game's pretty much over.
UGH (w/8 seconds left in the 4th). We lost to the fucking Grizzlies. Yeah, Stu Lantz and James Worthy were right, Kobe's gotta score 40 every game if we're gonna win. At least Turiaf got 25 minutes.
Ooo, the Grizzlies did something that every team should do. Make Kobe shoot 2 free throws rather than give him the open 3 to win the game. Only down by one with Hakim Warrick going to the line, about 6.5 seconds left. I like this situation. MISSED ONE, made the next. Down by 2, Kobe's getting the ball. Let's see if the Grizz foul him so that he doesn't get the open 3, and let the game go to overtime. Should be interesting. Smush got a 3 opportunity to win. He missed. FUCK HIM. Game over.
SMUSH IS A FUCKING FAGGOT AND SHOULD BE SHOT
3 p.m.
• That Karl Rove is a genius. What’s the best way to get your administration’s accusations of firing judges, or whatever that stupid “scandal” is about? Give your press spokesman cancer.
I didn't care too much for Tony when he sub-hosted for Rush all those years ago, but I didn't want him to get cancer for it.
8:15 a.m.
• OK, so I get oodles of male (and female) enhancement ads through my personal and work e-mail, along with letters from exiled African princes who offer me millions of dollars worth of inheritance loot for just a $5,000 loan. Anyway, I got this in my e-mail this morning, and, well …
Eigh teams left, three from 1980 with the possibility of an all 1980 match-up in the N.L. side of the Final Four. Here's a recap of the National League region/division finals.
N.L. East Finals: (14) 1980 Montreal Expos vs. (4) 1985 St. Louis Cardinals
Game 1: Cardinals 8, Expos 4
Cardinals jumped out to a 6-0 lead after three innings and Darrell Porter went 3 for 4 with a homerun (6th out the tournament) and 4 rbi.
Game 2: Cardinals 6, Expos 1
Andy Van Slyke hit a three-run homer in the first and Danny Cox pitched a complete game.
Game 3: Expos 4, Cardinals 1
Bill Gullickson and Woodie Fryman combined to keep the Cardinals bats in check and snap their nine game tournament winning streak.
Game 4: Expos 1, Cardinals 0
Steve Rogers out duels John Tudor as the two staff aces surrender a combined seven hits. The lone run comes in the 2nd on an Ellis Valentine triple.
Game 5: Cardinals 5, Expos 2
Another strong outing by Cox (8 IP, 4 H, 2 ER) and another big game for Porter (4 for 4, HR, 4 RBI) help in handing the Expos their first home loss of the tournament.
Game 6: Expos 6, Cardinals 4
Rodney Scott hit a two out, bases loaded single off of Ricky Horton in the top of the 9th to break 4-4 tie and force a deciding Game 7.
Game 7: Expos 10, Cardinals 2
Expos hammer Tudor for 8 runs in 6 innings and Rogers strikes out 10 in a complete game victory as the 1980 Expos shock the world as a 14 seed to win the N.L. East Region to advance the 80's Final Four.
Expos win series 4 games to 3
N.L. East All-Region Team
C: Darrell Porter, '85 Cardinals
1B: Jack Clark, '85 Cardinals
2B: Tom Herr, '85 Cardinals
3B: Mike Schmidt, '83 Phillies
SS: Chris Speier, '80 Expos
LF: Barry Bonds, '88 Pirates
CF: Andre Dawson, '80 Expos
RF: Ellis Valentine, '80 Expos
SP: Steve Rogers, '80 Expos
RP: Woodie Fryman, '80 Expos
Region MVP: Andre Dawson - .368/.394/.655, 87 AB, 14 R, 32 H, 6 2B, 2 3B, 5 HR, 18 RBI, 3 SB
N.L. West Finals: (9) 1987 San Francisco Giants vs. (7) 1980 Houston Astros
Game 1: Astros 6, Giants 4
A four run 3rd for the Astros off of Dave Dravecky does the damage here.
Game 2: Astros 10, Giants 2
Enos Cabell goes 3-5 with a homerun and Joe Niekro pitches a complete game as the Astros cruise to the 2-0 lead.
Game 3: Astros 7, Giants 5 16 innings
After the Giants blew 4-2 lead in the 9th, in the 12th Jose Cruz hit an rbi double to give the Astros a 5-4 lead. In the bottom of the inning Chili Davis would answer with a solo homerun to tie the game back up. Finally in the 16th the Astros ended it with two runs, the critical blow coming on a Cesar Cedeno triple.
Game 4: Astros 5, Giants 2
Eight strong innings from J.R. Richard wraps up the sweep for the Astros as they go an amazing 16-3 through the N.L. West region.
Astros win series 4 games to 0
N.L. West All-Region Team
C: Alan Ashby, '80 Astros
1B: Will Clark, '89 Giants
2B: Joe Morgan, '80 Astros
3B: Kevin Mitchell, '87 Giants
SS: Jose Uribe, '87 Giants
LF: Kevin Mitchell, '89 Giants
CF: Chili Davis, '87 Giants
RF: Dave Parker, '85 Reds
SP: Vern Ruhle, '80 Astros
RP: Ted Power, '85 Reds
Region MVP: Joe Morgan - .370/.453/.765, 81 AB, 17 R, 30 H, 9 2B, 7 HR, 24 RBI, 13 BB, 4 SB
Soooo, was there something in the water in 1980? I'm going to have to chalk this up to just a bizarre fluke but with the way the Astros dominated and the way the 1980 Yankees have dominated so far I am wondering about the 1980 Strat-O-Matic set.
Final Four: N.L. Finals
'80 Expos vs. '80 Astros
Up Next: A.L. Elite Eight
8:30 p.m.
• Time to see if I’m a true-blue Juggalo or a Poser. Before I begin, I have a funny/sad story related to the Insane Clown Posse that I would like to share. While working as a team leader for a test-scoring facility in Ohio, I came across this essay answer that was nothing more than the lyrics to ICP’s “Under the Moon” (I can’t remember what the test question was). Oddly enough, that wasn’t the only “rap song” answer I encountered while working this job. In an essay question asking the student to tell a story of how he or she overcame a challenge, I got the lyrics to the Notorious B.I.G. “Warning.” However, at the end of the essay, instead of talking about busting a cap in the home invaders, he wrote something like “Hold on, I hear somebody coming. Hey, it’s Bob and Steve. You two want to go and get something to eat?” But now I’m getting off-track. I have to test my Juggalo cred.
1.) How many members are in ICP?
a) 2
b) 4
c) 1
d) Unknown.
Answer: Two
2.) The members of ICP all have tha same first name , whut is it?
a) Steve
b) Mike
c) illig
d) Joseph
Answer: Fuck, I don’t know. They both look like “Mikes.”
3) Whut are the band-names tha members go by?
a) Violent J, Shaggy 2 Dope
b) AnyBody killa(ABK), Jumpsteady
c) Esham, Jumpsteady
d) Dont hav NE
Answer: Easy. J and Shaggy.
4) Whut waz the previous name used by tha members of ICP?(whut waz there street/gang name?)
a) Hatchet Family
b) Tha Dark Carnival
c) Insane Jester Gang
d) Inner City Posse
Answer: Inner City Posse – how the hell do I know that?
5) Whut was tha Story they were trying to tell through music?
a) Story of tha Dark Carnival
b) Hatchet warrior story
c) Tha story of tha jesters/jokers
d) There isnt a story
e) …
Answer: …
6) Did all tha members hav dreads?
a) No
b)Yes
c) Only one did
d) They didnt evere have dreads, they had braids
e) .....
Answer: I’m going with the “braids” answer because I smell a swerve with this one.
7) Well weather they were dreads or braids, why did one of them have to shave them off?
a) Never did
b) No reason
c) A new look
d) For a Movie
Answer: Got to be a movie. LL Cool J showed us his bald head in "Halloween: H2O." Nothing wrong with holding out for the right price.
8) Well if they made a movie whut waz it called?
a) Never made a movie
b) no names, they were music videos
c) Big money hustlas
d) Tha history of Insane Clown Posse
Answer: OK, well it looks like I got #7 right. I’ll go with Hustlas because I doubt they would have went with “Tha history…” title.
9) There were origanaly thought that there was supossed to be 7 joker cards but in tha end how many are there?
a) 5
b) 6
c) 4
d) 10
Answer: Unless there was some change to the joker cards after the Great Milenko, I'm pretty sure the answer is 6.
10) Whut joker card was tha master of Necromancy?
a) Tha Great Milenko
b) Tha Amazing Jeckle brothers
c) Carnival Carnag
d) Tha Wraith
e) Tha Ring Master
f) Tha Riddlebox
Answer: Oh hell, I think I actually know this one. Milenko.
OK, now time to see if I’m Juggalo-worthy. *Clicks submit.*
Juggalo
Your a True Juggalo, Born With a hatchet and a juggalo face, Cruisin with A trunk full of faygo and a car full of fat chix, and haunted by a Dark Carnival, your hmies are family too, and you believe Santa Clause is a fat bitch. Hallowen is prolly ur favorite Holiday. if this is tru and ur a juggalette you should im me on Aim: IndependentJ0ker (with tha number zero) Much Clown love!
I have no idea how many I got wrong on this quiz, and I don’t want to know. Actually, I'm more afraid of how many I got right. Oh hell, I'll admit it. I own Riddlebox, Tunnel of Love and Milenko (all of them are bought used -- even I have my standards). It's all in good campy fun. Plus they make fun of rednecks. OK, final story for tonight. During the late ‘90s, the better half’s mother watched a bit of pro wrestling, which was odd for me when she’d ask me questions about why the Undertaker wasn’t on television (injury) or why did Bret Hart go from the WWF to the “other place” (OMG VINCE SCREWED BRET). But the strangest encounter came when ICP was with the WWF in that “Oddities” group, and my future mother-in-law said that these two performers were “funny” and that she wanted to know if they were “real” musicians (I’m sure I can put quote marks around the word musicians, too). A short while later I gave her a copy of “Riddlebox” because I knew it would offend her beyond belief (almost as bad as the time I informed her of the “Piss Christ”), and I was right. Why she allowed me to eventually marry her daughter I have no idea.
7 p.m.
• Yesterday I talked about how much I like this time of year. However, there was one little thing I forgot to mention that I absolutely fucking hate. For some reason, when the sun starts shining, and people roll down the windows to their vehicles, many people get the urge to drive like assholes – or at least bigger assholes than they usually drive. I get it. You like to drive fast on a highway. Fine. But then people start weaving in and out of lanes during rush hour traffic just to get an extra car length or two. I witnessed several examples of this today, but the best by far was when one car was on its hood with the wheels still spinning. The funny thing was that there were no other cars hit or property damaged. My guess is that the driver was speeding and took a turn or hit the brakes, resulting in his car taking flight or flipping. Good.
• Whatever.
I really don’t care. Last year’s Monday Night crew was “eh,” and I’m sure this trio won’t be much better, or worse. But if this means more J.A. Adande “Jaws” impressions, then I throw my support behind this move.
9:30 a.m.
• Get the hell out of here.
HOWEVER
If there was "good parenting," the kids wouldn't be in daycare in one of these institutions. Yeah, I know, OMG what should SINGLE MOMS and WORKING FAMILIES do~?! and all that shit. How about this: don't have kids before you can afford them.
8 p.m.
• Looks like the winter season is over in my part of the country. This weekend was the first this year when the windows were opened throughout the house. I like the seasonal transition from winter to spring because it’s not too hot where the AC needs turned on and it’s not too cold so that the better half will bitch about being cold – well at least not bitch all that much. Too bad in a few months it’ll be hotter than shit. Then again, it beats snow so I’m not complaining. However, this weather means that pretty soon I’ll have to start mowing the lawn again. In addition, I’m going to have to rake the leaves in the backyard, too. The last two years I raked the leaves in the autumn right before the snow, but this past season I was sick and didn’t get around to doing so. At least that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
• Payback is a bitch, mother fucker.
Wait a second.
Sonofabitch. It wasn’t Mike Nifong. Wow. Never thought I’d live to see the day where I feel sympathy for a defense lawyer. Then again, if I should ever get dragged into court I’ll probably be showering my Jew lawyer with praise.
• Awesome.
Why do I think this is funny? Because Middletown, Ohio, my former residence, is located in Butler County. Oddly enough, there is a Butler county in the southwestern Pennsylvania area, too. It's the county just above Allegheny county (which is where Shittsburgh is located). For those that don't know by now, my county is to the east of Allegheny. While I’m on the subject of Middletown, I remember this story from two years ago, and I don’t think I've mentioned it here before.
During my limited time living in Middletown, I never had a problem with the local tax people. Actually, I’ve never had a problem with any local tax people anywhere I have lived. Well, last year my local tax man didn’t cash my April check until the end of May, but whatever. It's local government.
The US won 3-1 today against Ecuador. I thought the team looked like crap in the first half, but came out to play in the second half. It was the Landon Donovan show out there, as his hat-trick performance obviously shows. The attendance at the game was in the 31,000 range, and most of the fans were American, so FINALLY the USMNT is starting to drum up some support. The only unfortunate part about this is that support should have been drummed up after we got to the Quarterfinals of the 02 WC, but that's another matter. Anyways, next game's Wednesday at 9:00 EDT on ESPN2 against Guatemala, and the next after that is in June against China. The Guates will get throttled.
El Tri won 2-1 today. Fucking gay. They're our bitches anyway, so I don't care. I hope that they play Bofo next time we face them, because that way they won't get any goals. Lucky ass Mexicans.
Tomorrow I'll talk about something else.
Since I watch a lot of soccer, and there was another round of Euro 2008 qualifiers today, I thought that I should post this, as it will tie in with what I was gonna blog today.
Now, as someone that's followed the beautiful game (fuck you guys that dissent or call that a faggot name, it is) for a while, this came as a shock. Serbia and Montenegro qualified for the World Cup that took place last year in Germany. However, after the World Cup, the football federations peacefully split, just as the countries had months before. Even though the countries split, only one of the players that played for the unified team during the World Cup was of Montenegrin origin, thus the Serbian team was at full strength.
The Borats (it's much easier for me to type this instead of Kazakhs, even though I prefer not to refer to them as Borats) are ranked 143rd in the world, and the likes of Eritrea, Antigua and Barbuda, Palestine, and Equatorial Guinea are ranked ahead of them. The Serbs are ranked 28th, and for comparison, the US is ranked 30th (needless to say, this will change with the Serbian loss). The mere fact that the Borat's were able to hold a 2-0 lead over the Serbs is astounding, and it's even more astounding that they were able to beat the Serbs. They haven't won a competitive game since entering European competition. I figured that they'd pick up their first win against Armenia, but I digress.
MOVING ON
I wish I could find this video of something I saw today. I was watching Norway-Bosnia earlier, and the fans peppered the field with fireworks and flares. The Bosnians were protesting some shit that their FA did, so they decided that they wanted to throw fireworks and flares at their own players. The odd thing was that the game was in Oslo, so the only way the Bosnian fans could get the flares in was by sticking them in their assholes. It didn't even happen in Bosnia. Go figure that one out.
The US plays Ecuador tomorrow, at a comfortable 12:00 EDT start time, on ESPN2. Big transition period for the US, as we're getting guys like McBride, Pope and Reyna out of the picture, and getting some of the youngin's like Jay Demerit, Taylor Twellman (PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD) and after the U-21 World Cup, Freddy Adu into the picture. I'm jazzed, I think we'll handle the Ecuadorians with a score of 1-0. Ecuador struggles when they have to come down out of altitude, so considering that this game's in Tampa, now's the time to get some confidence going into this summer's Gold Cup and Copa America.
That's it for now, I'll talk about how the above game went tomorrow.
So after almost missing my flight (I woke up late), I flew from Portland and returned back to the Oakland airport, then I drove home to wash my Ref gear and try to get the blood out of my Ref shirt. On the way home, I stopped at a big 5 and bought a brand new Ref shirt just in case I didn't get the blood stains out when I got home. I already had 2 ref's shirt as it was, but one is a normal ref shirt while the other has a long zipper on it....and guess which one I prefer wearing, the one that doesn't have a long zipper on it, and that one had the blood stains on it so I bought another one that is the same excat one I perfer to wear. Anyways, around 3, I started making my way to CCW in Newman.
Now Newman is quite a way aways from where I live now. So its a nice long drive down a few freeways/highways...but I have having an issue on the entire trip down there. At the end of year 2005, I got in a car accident that broke the piece of my car that holds my blinkers and my headlights. The piece broke on the passenger side of my car...and I haven't been able to get it repaired yet. I have the parts but its either expensive or I've just been to lazy to try and put the pieces on....and I'm also not to good with cars either, so my answer to my broken headlight and blinker? Duct tape the blinker into my car and since the headlight still works, just the casing is broken, put serriane wrap over the broken casing, so no water gets to the blub and breaks it when its on.
Now the duct tape over the blinker was kinda wearing out a bit due to the odd cold and hot weather we've been having lately, and all the way down there, about ever 15 to 20 minutes my blinker would play peek-a-boo with me by popping up over the hood waving hi to me. So I would have to stop and put somew new duct tape on the blinker and car to hold the blinker in...but the roll of duct tape that I had in the trunk was old as well so the damn thing would keep popping up every 15 to 20 minutes. After about the 3rd time of playing peek-a-boo with my fucking blinker, I stopped at a Shell gas station that sold the small rolls of duct tapes for cars, so I bought the last 3 rolls of duct tape and then preceeded to duct tape the hell of my blinker and car....save to say, it stayed in the rest of the trip there and then the trip to Rocky afterwards.
I got the arena just before 6, I said my hellos and then went back to the locker room to get changed again. The Ref's for the show was me and Guido and a new guy whose name escapes me at the moment...I think it was Casey, though I'm not sure. It was good to work with Guido again, I didn't really like working with the last Ref CCW used at last months show. Something just didn't sit well with him, so yeah working with Guido again was a breathe of freash air. The other Ref, Casey, was really new to the scene, so new infact this was going to be his first time Ref'ing! So before the show started me and Guido went over differant things with Casey to make sure he had an idea on what he would be doing. Then the show started at 7 and on we went.
I had the opening match of the night which was a triple threat. It was Ryan Drago vs El Chupacbabra vs Kenny K with his manager Shawn Stevens. This was also my first time doing a triple threat. Everything went really well as I just stayed out of there way and let them do their thing. Ryan Dragon won the match after Chupi submitted to a figure four leglock. After the match Drago kept attacking Chupiacabra's knee until I backed Drago off Chupi. Afterwards I helped Chuupacabra back to the locker room.
The next match I did was a tag team match. It was The Reno Boys (Luster the Legend and Malachi) w/ Buddy Sotello Esquire vs The Rock Legend Scum Adam Thornstowe and "Showtime" Shane Dynasty who holds the Dead Fed title (Formerly the GZW title....that promotion just died after having..umm issues, yeah I'll just use that word.) The backstory of this match was that Buddy Sotello managed both Adam Thornstowe and Shane Dynasty but couldn't produce what he promised both guys and that would be the CCW Heavyweight title that Vinnie Massaro holds, so both Adam and Shane fired Buddy and now we have this match.
This match was crazy and I had already knew it would have been, when you have bad blood between so many people, its going to be a crazy match....and I was right. The match was your pretty standard tag match as both Malachi and Luster kept Shane Dynasty away from his partner and kept working him over. Adam kept trying to get into the ring to make the save but I had to keep cutting him off as he never made the tag. After a little while, Shane made a clean clear tag to Adam then everything went crazier, as all 4 men had gone to the outside. So now I have to deal with Luster the Legend, Buddy Sotello, Malachi, Adam Thornstowe and Shane Dynasty all fighting outside while I have to keep an eye on Buddy Sotello who just happen to be right next to all 4 men fighting. Then all of a sudden when I thought I was getting all 4 guys back in the ring, Shane and Adam threw Malachi in a bunch of chairs, as I was tending to Malachi I looked up into the ring and Adam was pinning Luster so I slid back in and made the 1...2...3. Annoucing that both Shane Dynasty and Adam Thronstowe as the winners of the tag match. After that took place, for some reason The Reno Boys were about to kick Buddy Sotello's ass and after a few minutes...and Buddy's crying and begging, The Reno Boys let Buddy go and we went back to the locker room. That was my final match for the night so afterwards I went and put my street clothes back on.
It was diffently a fun show and I had fun doing both matches. After the show was over, I said my good byes and started making my way to Oakland so I could do the Rocky Horror Picture Show, and that was my wrestling show weekend. I have so much fun working for BAW and CCW but unfortuanily I won't be doing BAW in OR in April as it's getting a bit pricey for me, so I'm going to skip this month's show to save money for the show in May, but of course I'll post a pre-view when BAW puts one out.
I really hope you guys are enjoying my stories about being on the road and working the indy scene....and if your not....to bad. :0)
So we're now down to just eight teams and no World Champions as the '80 Yankees smacked the '83 Orioles around in four games, outscoring the O's 37-15. The '87 Blue Jays blew the division title the last weekend of the 1987 season but they aren't blowing it here as they took care of the '88 Red Sox in five games. In the West both series ended in thrilling Game 6's. The '88 Twins eliminated the '86 Angels on a Kent Hrbek homerun in the top of the 10th off of Doug Corbett. Then in the most improbable moment of the tournament, Jerry Dybzinski (3 homeruns in 909 career at bats) of the '83 White Sox hit a walkoff homerun against Dan Quisenberry in the 13th inning to eliminate the '84 Royals. With the elimination of the '83 Orioles, the '85 Cardinals are now the only World Series team to still be alive in the tournament.
Stats are for all three rounds.
A.L. West Semi-Finals
(12) 1988 Minnesota Twins def. (9) 1986 California Angels 4-2
Game 1: Angels 3, Twins 0
Game 2: Twins 5, Angels 2
Game 3: Angels 14, Twins 3
Game 4: Twins 9, Angels 4
Game 5: Twins 6, Angels 1
Game 6: Twins 5, Angels 2 10 innings
Gary Gaetti: .364/.395/.649, 77 AB, 15 R, 28 H, 2 3B, 5 HR, 19 RBI
Tom Herr: .333/.402/.469, 81 AB, 15 R, 27 H, 5 2B, 10 BB, 4 SB
(6) 1983 Chicago White Sox def. (10) 1984 Kansas City Royals 4-2
Game 1: White Sox 4, Royals 2
Game 2: Royals 6, White Sox 0
Game 3: White Sox 6, Royals 3
Game 4: White Sox 15, Royals 2
Game 5: Royals 4, White Sox 3 10 innings
Game 6: White Sox 5, Royals 4 13 innings
Rudy Law: .361/.411/.542, 83 AB, 20 R, 30 H, 5 2B, 5 3B, 11 RBI, 14 SB
Harold Baines: .363/.386/.550, 80 AB, 12 R, 29 H, 4 HR, 21 RBI
A.L. East Semi-Finals
(13) 1987 Toronto Blue Jays def. (9) 1988 Boston Red Sox 4-1
Game 1: Blue Jays 6, Red Sox 5
Game 2: Blue Jays 3, Red Sox 1
Game 3: Blue Jays 9, Red Sox 1
Game 4: Red Sox 6, Blue Jays 5
Game 5: Blue Jays 5, Red Sox 4
Lloyd Moseby: .270/.353/.514, 74 AB, 14 R, 20 H, 5 HR, 15 RBI
Jimmy Key: 5-1, 2.73 ERA, 3 CG, 56 IP, 50 H, 17 ER, 12 BB, 32 SO
(6) 1980 New York Yankees def. (2) 1983 Baltimore Orioles 4-0
Game 1: Yankees 13, Orioles 10
Game 2: Yankees 10, Orioles 4
Game 3: Yankees 5, Orioles 1
Game 4: Yankees 9, Orioles 0
Reggie Jackson: .339/.413/.857, 56 AB, 15 R, 19 H, 9 HR, 14 RBI
Willie Randolph: .396/.500/.642, 53 AB, 15 R, 21 H, 6 2B, 12 RBI, 11 BB, 4 SB
A.L. West Finals
(12) '88 Twins vs. (6) '83 White Sox
A.L. East Finals
(13) '87 Blue Jays vs. (6) '80 Yankees
Up Next: N.L. Elite Eight
11:45 p.m.
• So I was flipping channels earlier today and came across some hippie Vh1 show that showed mini-videos. Eh. Oh well, this one got a laugh out of me. While I'm sorta on this subject, I actually like that Gene Simmons show on A&E. I don't watch this program on a regular basis, but if there is nothing else playing I'll put the remote down. I'm not a huge fan of Kiss, but the fact Gene is so obsessed with money makes him one of my heroes.
7:30 p.m.
• I’ve bitched about this before, but I don’t care.
Boo-fucking hoo. If you can’t afford a home, then don’t get a subprime loan you stupid fucks. I know owning a home is the “American Dream” and all that shit, but go at it the right way. Make sound choices in your life. Don’t live beyond your means. And for the love of Christ, don’t get an adjustable mortgage rate. Unlike the family mentioned above in this pseudo-sob story, don’t worry about the foosball table and hot tub until after you get financial matters in order. Oh this shit pisses me off. Sometimes life can throw you a curveball, but if you are prepared for it you have a better chance at properly reacting to whatever comes your way. It pays to hold out for the best possible deal rather than instantly gratify yourself and have it come back to bite you in the ass later.
• If we don’t help out citrus farmers, the terrorists win.
Actually, this type of shit goes on all the time in politics – attaching some pork, err, orange, to a bill that has nothing to do with the added spending. But since Democrats are now in charge I’m OUTRAGED!
• I’m sure this guy, if convicted, can get the East Valley Tribune for free in the prison’s library.
I was surfin' the net cause I'm bored, and I came across some dumbass shit that George Karl said. I only take this sports shit so seriously because it's a release from the real world, and honestly, I have enough shit to worry about in real life. I like piling more shit up, and I need something else to worry about. SOOOOO
Hey George, call me when you win something. LOLZ
Seriously though, the guy needs to worry about his own team. If my team was in such a shitty state that the Nuggets are currently in, I know I wouldn't be watching the Lakers play the Blazers. But then again, that's why he's George Karl, and that's why he hasn't won shit. And apparently, never will with that attitude.
And one last thing...
Cool shit. The game was in New Orleans, and I think that was the only time that I haven't seen an arena full when the Lakers take their show on the road. I think the city needs to take care of other business before bringing basketball back. Just my opinion.
Oh yeah, Kobe scored 50 again tonight. He and Wilt stand together as the only players to score 50 in 4 straight games. You can say what you want about Jordan, but I haven't seen a player this dominant in my entire life. Except for Shaq, but his game wasn't perfect. I honestly can't say that there's something basketball related (saving potential rape joke) that Kobe could be better at. His game is perfect. Sadly though, I don't know how much longer he'll be able to go before his knees start giving out on him. It seems like he loses more and more hop as the games go by.
But maybe I'm just so used to watching him that I expect too much. Well, I do, but he hasn't failed to meet my expectations yet.
7:45 p.m.
• What's this?
Please let it be a Jew bitching about the “Passion.”
Oh well. Maybe next time.
Good for Mel. Too bad he wasn’t drunk. It would have been more entertaining.
Oh shut up you fucking bitch. “Your people” did some crazy shit – all cultures do. Deal with it.
Here’s my favorite part.
For the last fucking time – THIS PART OF THE WORLD WAS FUCKED UP BEFORE WHITEY CAME ALONG AND TOOK ALL YOUR GOLD! Say, this reminds me of my Quickie Mart days. There was this hippie chick that I used to work with. Well, actually, “hippie,” doesn’t do her justice. She was one of those wiccan moonbats who really believed all that shit, and this was before “Charmed” made wicca cool: or at least showed some practitioners with nice tits. Our magic moment came when I told her Indians weren’t these holier-than-thou pacifists and that they could tear shit up with the best of them. I also mentioned the Aztecs would sacrifice and eat their babies to appease the Sun God, or one of those things they worshipped. Did the Aztecs actually do this? I don’t remember, but I probably heard that they did, so it must be true. This chick then said that she followed this one tribe which roamed the Great Plains and lived off what the land provided for them. She then commented that one day they mysteriously disappeared, to which I replied, “That’s because the baby-eating Indians came up and kicked their asses.”
Boy did that sure piss her off. Hey, a quick Google search shows that my baby-eating remark may have legs (and arms, too, depending on Chief I-Sold-New-York-For-A-Bag-Of-Beads-From-The-Dollar-Store's appetite).
And this is from Informationliberation.com – THE NEWS YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO KNOW! :o :o :o
• So Eminem, who has bitched in the past about CENSORSHIP, is trying to silence his ex-wife. (They're now divorced? That's right. Today's Friday.)
Oh you got to be shitting me. This can’t be serious.
Hey, what is this? Why, it’s the lyrics to one of Eminem’s songs.
How DARE that bitch say Em is "slacking very much when it comes to the kids." That would make any baby daddy mad enough to kill ... or at least write a song about it.
The '88 Pirates magical run that has captured the nation is finally over as they ran into buzzsaw in the '85 Cardinals. The series did have marathon 15 inning Game 1 that ended on a Jeff Robinson wild pitch to score Jack Clark from 3rd. The Expos may no longer exist but their 1980 team is still alive as they tossed aside the '88 Mets in five games. In the West the the the '80 Astros acutally had to sweat for once in this tournament after falling behind 2-1 to the '89 Giants but they won three straight to win the series. Unfortunately the Giants reign of terror is not quite over as the '87 Giants beat the '85 Reds in a seven game thriller in which five of the seven games were decided by one run.
Stat lines are for all three rounds.
N.L. East Semi-Finals
(4) 1985 St. Louis Cardinals def. (16) 1988 Pittsburgh Pirates 4-0
Game 1: Cardinals 1, Pirates 0 15 innings
Game 2: Cardinals 12, Pirates 3
Game 3: Cardinals 7, Pirates 1
Game 4: Cardinals 3, Pirates 2
Willie McGee: .368/.392/.559, 68 AB, 9 R, 25 H, 3 3B, 2 HR, 11 RBI, 7 SB
John Tudor: 2-0, 1.05 ERA, 42 1/3 IP, 23 H, 5 ER, 10 BB, 30 SO
(14) 1980 Montreal Expos def. (7) 1988 New York Mets 4-1
Game 1: Expos 4, Mets 3
Game 2: Mets 7, Expos 2
Game 3: Expos 7, Mets 3
Game 4: Expos 7, Mets 4
Game 5: Expos 9, Mets 5
Andre Dawson: .387/.400/.710, 62 AB, 12 R, 24 H, 4 2B, 2 3B, 4 HR, 15 RBI
Rodney Scott: .412/.446/.549, 51 AB, 7 R, 21 H, 3 2B, 2 3B, 12 RBI, 8 SB
-Rodney Scott hit .224 in 1980, odds are this won't keep up.
N.L. West Semi-Finals
(9) 1987 San Francisco Giants def. (13) 1985 Cincinnati Reds 4-3
Game 1: Reds 4, Giants 3
Game 2: Reds 5, Giants 4
Game 3: Giants 6, Reds 4
Game 4: Giants 6, Reds 3
Game 5: Giants 5, Reds 4
Game 6: Reds 5, Giants 4
Game 7: Giants 1, Reds 0
Candy Maldonado: .338/.353/.554, 65 AB, 10 R, 22 H, 2 3B, 3 HR, 11 RBI
Rick Reuschel: 4-0, 0.96 ERA, 47 IP, 43 H, 5 ER, 10 BB, 27 SO
(7) 1980 Houston Astros def. (3) 1989 San Francisco Giants 4-2
Game 1: Astros 5, Giants 3 11 innings
Game 2: Giants 6, Astros 5
Game 3: Giants 2, Astros 1
Game 4: Astros 6, Giants 5
Game 5: Astros 10, Giants 1
Game 6: Astros 3, Giants 2
Joe Morgan: .410/.486/.869, 61 AB, 13 R, 25 H, 8 2B, 6 HR, 19 RBI
Vern Ruhle: 5-0, 2.91 ERA, 43 1/3 IP, 45 HR, 14 ER, 4 BB, 18 SO
N.L. East Finals
(14) '80 Expos vs. (4) '85 Cardinals
N.L. West Finals
(9) '87 Giants vs. (7) '80 Astros
Up Next: A.L. Sweet 16
THURSDAY
Southern Illinois vs. Kansas, 7:10/4:10 PM. Not too sure about this one, considering that Kansas hasn't been challenged so far this tournament. The Salukis looked good against Va. Tech, but I thought that a lot of teams would look good against the Hokies, so it's sorta misleading. I GUESS I'll pick the Jayhawks by eh, 10.
Texas A&M vs. Memphis, 7:27/4:27 PM. No Chris Douglas-Roberts makes this pick really, really easy. And even if CDR does play, he won't be the same player that he was before he got hurt. Aggies, easy.
Pittsburgh vs. UCLA, 9:40/6:40 PM. FUCLA finds ways to win games. They could blow dick all game, and they'd still win. Based on that, I'll pick them in a close, boring game. UCLA 40, PITT 35. And I get to watch all of it. yay.
Tennessee vs. Ohio State, 9:57/6:47 PM. Ugh. Two teams I totally dislike and don't want to talk about, and I still have to pick one. Ohio State.
FRIDAY
Butler vs. Florida, 7:10/4:10 PM. I think Billy Donovan's going to have the right gameplan for this game. If the Gators come out bombing 3-pointers, they're going to be in for a close one. If they get the ball on the blocks to Horford, Noah and sometimes Richard, Butler's going to have no chance. I don't think Butler's going to win anyway, and I think that Florida will keep the game in the post. Florida by 20.
Vanderbilt vs. Georgetown, 7:27/4:27 PM. I had Georgetown winning it all, but I've gotta say, this looks like a good upset pick. The Hoyas have struggled all tournament, but they haven't played a team with enough athleticism to take advantage of it. I think that Vanderbilt's got that athleticism. So, Vanderbilt in OT.
UNLV vs. Oregon, 9:40/6:40 PM. I like UNLV a lot. Oregon can beat them, but for some reason I feel that UNLV's gonna pull it out. They're nearly identical teams. So, UNLV by 6.
USC vs. North Carolina, 9:57/6:47 PM. We will win. That's it.
KKK's Top 103 Posters
Number 33: Hawk 34
Even though we have never met, Hawk and I have an unbreakable bond that can never be broken, much like the one I have with fellow poster Gert T. What's that bond? We have all lived in or near the Middletown, Ohio, region. With its unique mix of white and ghetto trash, Middletown has this charm that other, more developed communities lack. Oh there were many a night when I saw the flashing lights of a police car racing down by my townhouse along Clark Street off to catch some hooligans. Speaking of racing, Hawk likes that NASCAR stuff. I don’t know how that’s a redeeming quality to me, seeing I don’t really care about this sport (yes, I call it a sport), but whatever. And you know what, even though he’s been suspected of being the previously banned poster Choken One, I really don’t care. I had no qualms with Choken, so even if Hawk is the “One,” thus swerving nobody on this board but me, big deal. I do have several reasons to believe Hawk isn’t Choken, and one of them is that Hawk has shown me a picture of his squeeze. Even though she is hot, I don’t believe they are cousins. Now if Hawk would have only sent me a picture of her without all those pesky clothes, he might have cracked the Top 20.
And now a word or three from the expert panel I've assembled to comment on the people I've listed.
From Black Lushus:
From SFA Jack:
From Cancer Marney:
5:45 p.m.
• So I stayed 15 minutes past my normal workday and decided to let the better half, who was home sick, know that I was going to be late. As I told her this over the phone, she then said, “Can you stop and get me a Happy Meal?” (I can already hear the “Vyce” jokes being typed.)
FUCK.
No, it’s not that I hate spending money – well, OK, it’s partly that – but it’s more that Happy Meal = McDonald’s, and the only Golden Arches that’s on the way home from work is a shithole. Well, the store itself isn’t too bad, but all their employees are ghetto trash and the service is awful. Every time I have stopped there, I swear to Christ that it takes at least 10 minutes for them to get an order done. But oh well, I’m a great good average at least I don’t cheat husband, so I went.
I pulled in and the first thing I do is make that all-important decision: Drive-thru or in-store? Generally, my rule is if the drive-thru line is a few cars deep I’ll brave this route; otherwise, just go inside. Because there were no cars in plain sight in the drive-thru I figured what the heck and made my choice. Besides, at this store it really doesn’t matter because no matter where you go – you’re going to be waiting regardless. As I pulled to the speaker and delivered my order I looked at my dashboard clock – 3:52 p.m. I had the “Who Made Who” soundtrack playing and skipped to “Chase the Ace,” my favorite track on the album. I love how that shit picks up as the song continues. As much as I like the first track, the self-titled “Who Made Who,” I can only listen to the first two verses before getting bored, and “For Those About to Rock” has the opposite effect for me; I usually fast-forward to around the 4-minute mark when the cannons start firing. “You Shook Me All Night Long” is another solid offering, but, like “Who Made Who,” I start zoning out after the first verse or two. “Sink the Pink” and “Shake Your Foundations” are good tracks to have on as background noise. I generally don’t pay attention to “Hells Bells.” Those other two tracks – eh. Have I mentioned how awful the movie to this soundtrack is?
3:55 p.m. OK, when I placed my order there were only two vehicles in front of me. And the first automobile hasn’t budged. “Chase The Ace” is over and I want more AC/DC, but no more “Maximum Overdrive” memories. I reach into my portfolio bag and pull out “Highway to Hell.” Good enough, I’ll play “Girls Got Rhythm,” which is, at the moment, my favorite track of the album. Still no movement in the drive-thru line.
3:59 p.m. Oh you got to be fucking kidding me. I waited all this time and the motorist two cars down from me got a tiny bag of food? If there were several drink carriers being handed to him I could understand for the delay, but damn. Maybe a new batch of fries needed greased up or a Fillet o’ Fish had to be made from scratch. “Girls Got Rhythm” is over – maybe there’s enough time to hear some local RIGHT-WING RADIO and listen to the idiotic callers bitch about how Pennsylvania has these gay-ass state liquor stores? Seriously, these things are so fucking retarded. No, we can’t buy booze at a grocery store or a Quickie Mart. Why, that would make all of our kids alcoholics because what if they reach for a gallon of milk and accidentally pick up a six-pack of Bud? Then again, because I’m too lazy to head off to one of these government adult beverage centers I don’t buy alcohol, which saves me a few dollars. That’s one of the things I missed about Ohio – being able to buy alcohol any time, any place (well, almost any place). Jesus Christ this line isn’t moving, and there’s only one car in front of me.
4:02 p.m. Well, the top-of-the-hour newscast is beginning, so it’s time to put in another CD. Let’s see, how about “History of the Clash: Volume I”? I’m in the mood for “The Magnificent Seven” – Ring, ring it’s 7 a.m. There we go. And there goes the motorist. Well, this person actually left during “Wave bye-bye to the boss, it’s our profit it’s his loss,” but that wouldn't have sounded as clever. Now it’s my turn to wait. You know what annoys me? When you are waiting in line for other customers that take forever and a day to get their order, and then when it’s your turn the wait is virtually nil and the cashier gets impatient because you have the nerve to double-check your order. And by double-check I mean look into the bag to make sure a burger and fries are in there. Well, that sorta happened when my order was completed, but drive-thru cashiers are more accustomed to customers doing a quick once-over. Hey, my order is here, and it’s 4:07 p.m. Just in time for “Rock the Casbah.” You know, I often defend rappers for sampling music, but what Will Smith did with that “Will 2K” abortion was too much even for me to handle. Let my memories of this song be of that cute armadillo scampering about.
Fifteen minutes, one Happy Meal, three songs and some RIGHT-WING RADIO banter. And the sad thing is, I thought I'd be waiting longer. Nevertheless, Sharif don't like it. But what am I going to do – declare a jihad? I have no children to strap with explosives, and there's no way I'd turn my kitties into martyrs. Considering they are all fixed, I doubt they would be able to do much with their 40 virgins and all.
8 a.m.
• Whenever you think you suck at your job, just read this.
• Al Gore says that the planet has a "fever."
So where do we stick the thermometer for a temperature reading?
This is how we do it.
Its friday night, and I feel all right
The party is here on the west side
So I reach for my 40 and I turn it up
Designated driver take the keys to my truck
Hit the shore cause Im faded
Honeys in the street say, monty, yo we made it!
It feels so good in my hood tonight
The summertime skirts and the guys in kani
All the gang bangers forgot about the drive-by
You gotta get your groove on, before you go get paid
So tip up your cup and throw your hands up
And let me hear the party say
1- Im kinda buzzed and its all because
(this is how we do it)
South central does it like nobody does
(this is how we do it)
To all my neighbors you got much flavor
(this is how we do it)
Lets flip the track, bring the old school back
(this is how we do it)
This is how we do it, all hands are in the air
And wave them from here to there
If youre an o.g. mack or a wanna-be player
You see the hoods been good to me
Ever since I was a lower-case g
But now Im a big g. the girls see I got the money
A hundred-dollar bills yall
If you were from where Im from then you would know
That I gotta get mine in a big black truck
You can get yours in a 64
Whatever it is, the partys underway
So tip up your cup and throw your hands up
And let me hear the party say
(repeat 1...)
Im kinda buzzed and its all because
(this is how we do it)
South central does it like nobody does
(this is how we do it)
Ynv, scc, all my homies
(this is how we do it)
Ill never come wack on an old school track
Rap:
Check it out!
Once upon a time in 94
Montell made no money and life sure was slow
All they said was 68 he stood
And people thought the music that he made was good
There lived a d.j. and paul was his name
He came up to monty, this is what he said
You and og are gonna make some cash
Sell a million records and well make in a dash
