Dr. Tom

Not really. I had a crew cut when I was younger, but that's about it. If I look like any sports person, it would probably be John Daly, though my hair is a little darker and I'm less pudgy. They all like me way too much to yell at me. This is certainly true, especially of my mother. Not since I quit the retail world years ago. We have lackeys who do that sort of thing. Not anymore, though I do own a pair. I had eye surgery a few years ago, and should probably go back and have it touched up. Indeed. I can point to a lot of things I see and think, "I was raised better than that." This is absolutely 100% true.

Didn't Mrs. Ketchup say something about "un-American" in her speech? How was the reporter putting words in her mouth in that case? (I don't know if she did or not... I actually haven't seen much of the news in the past day or two, but the blurb I caught seemed to indicate that she did.) I didn't watch the convention, and I won't watch the GOP's dog-and-pony show, either. I don't expect the tone to be any different than what I've read of the Dems' so far, though I expect the same amount of bitching in the media, this time from the left.

Hah! That's a good one, Vyce. They'd have to get his balls out of their collective mouth first, and I doubt that will be happening. The Coulter fiasco has been interesting. It's clear their editors had NO IDEA what they were getting when they brought her onboard. It's also clear their grasp of the English language is quite flawed.

No.

What started out as something funny has turned into something else again. Dames has been catching heat for a lot of you using images from paul-london.com, especially after it became "cool" to leech their images and "invade" their board. It needs to stop, and it needs to stop now. So, this is what needs to happen. 1. If you are using an image from paul-london.com in your avatar or sig, either upload it to another web page or stop using it. 2. Stop harassing the staff of paul-london.com and stop trying to crash and invade their boards. Things could have been handled differently on both sides, but just because someone isn't nice-nice when they make their initial request does not give someone else carte blanche to screw them over. We're trying to have a reputable site here, and the conduct of people on the forums is part of that. To get past this, we need you to act like responsible people, not hooligans. The two steps above are not hard to do. I encourage anyone to whom they apply to start making good on them. This will be cross-posted in the Site Feedback folder.

What started out as something funny has turned into something else again. Dames has been catching heat for a lot of you using images from paul-london.com, especially after it became "cool" to leech their images and "invade" their board. It needs to stop, and it needs to stop now. So, this is what needs to happen. 1. If you are using an image from paul-london.com in your avatar or sig, either upload it to another web page or stop using it. 2. Stop harassing the staff of paul-london.com and stop trying to crash and invade their boards. Things could have been handled differently on both sides, but just because someone isn't nice-nice when they make their initial request does not give someone else carte blanche to screw them over. We're trying to have a reputable site here, and the conduct of people on the forums is part of that. To get past this, we need you to act like responsible people, not hooligans. The two steps above are not hard to do. I encourage anyone to whom they apply to start making good on them. This will be cross-posted in the WWE folder.

For some reason, the Orioles have a tendency to hit Pedro pretty hard. I know we drubbed him badly at least once this season. Of course, the O's also used to own Randy Johnson, but that's because then-manager Davey Johnson would put 9 RH in his lineup.

For some reason, I've just never liked David Aldridge. He's always been very annoying to me, and I have no idea why. So I can't really say that I'm sorry he's leaving ESPN. Bob Ryan is a great replacement host. But the next time Wilbon goes somewhere and needs a replacement, they should bring in WOODY PAIGE~!

There is a third book in the series, called The Bourne Ultimatum. Since they're keeping the titles, I'd expect the eventual movie to be called that, also. The movies, however, are almost nothing like the books. I will say that the books are definitely worth reading. I've heard there's a fourth book, not written by Ludlum, but I haven't seen it or read it.

Meh, what the heck. Count me in, too.

Hell no they shouldn't. Whether the woman got the sperm from a clinic or from someone she knows who donated it, the donor should not have to pay one red cent. By going the sperm-donation route, the woman is obviously saying she doesn't want to raise the child as part of a family unit, and wants to do it herself. Let her. And let her twist in the bloody wind if she changes her mind.

Of course. Only the best pr0n for the kids. THINK OF THE CHILDREN~! I'm all about payment for services rendered.

Shamelessly stolen from the "3 Untouchables" thread. So which three players on your favorite team would you like to see tarred, feathered, and sent packing? Orioles: David Segui BJ Surhoff Sidney Ponson Segui was a horrible free-agent pickup. Surhoff is just old and taking up a roster spot that could go to Jack Cust. Ponson is a big piece of shit who never should have been signed to a rich contract. Honorable mention to Jason Grimsley, for the dumbfuck trade that brought him to town.

Saves are an inherently worthless stat, though. Most relievers come into a game in the 9th inning, no one on base, and a two or three-run lead. Even a chap with a 4.50 ERA will hold that lead more often than not. There are good closers out there (like Rivera and Gagne), and there have been others in the past, but 300 saves or 400 saves can't hold a candle to 300 wins, or any of the other "magic numbers." As for DH'es, if the stats are there, they shouldn't be penalized for being a DH. The DH is part of the game now.

I saw it earlier this afternoon. This one was probably even with the first one. I liked how the suspense was created early and maintained throughout the entire movie. The fight scenes were done differently, and were a little too kinetic and hard to follow as a result. But definitely good stuff. Review coming in a day or two.

I've pretty much always been a NL player. My old roommate says the money's easier to make in Limit, but I've only tried it a couple times. The problem I have with it is that you can't protect your good hands nearly as well. I know people who prefer it because you can't take big losses at once like you can in NL, but to me, that's part of gambling. Tonight, I won a $10 sit-and-go on UB. I had 10's under and faced an all-in with 3 low cards on the flop, and decided to call, gussing the other player had A-K. He actually had A-Q, and that gave me the early chip lead, which I'd keep until trading it back and forth with the guy I ended up heads-up against at the end. I raised with Q-9 suited, bet big when a Q flopped, and then turned a 9. I bet 1000 chips at the pot to keep him in, he went all-in, and I called. Turns out he had 2 Pair also, but his were Q-3. w00t~!

Dear Diary, Some people just never learn that their presence is not wanted. It doesn't amaze me anymore (and it really never did), but I do notice how much better I am than these poor, misguided souls who can never confront reality. Awash in awesome, Dr. Tom

Nah, I'd tell him to get the sand out of his vagina and stop being so thin-skinned. Then, when he would inevitably ask, "What's a vagina," I could enact my Pr0n In The Classrooms Plan. It would be... at least for me. Maybe I can have both Cabinet posts? I'm good at time management...

Early next month, you can pick up the first season of KNIGHT RIDER~! on DVD.

This thread gets a big thumbs-up. Really, some of you people suck at the internet.

Your standards for heroism are appallingly low.

The reality is that this happens no more often than anyone else gets a boob job, relative to the population as a whole. While breast enlargment might not be the best way for Army doctors to practice their craft, any experience they gain is important when a dozen wounded men are wheeled in needing cosmetic surgery to look normal again.

Can I be your Secretary of State, Mike? I'd love to give the middle finger to every leader in the Middle East. The day before we bomb the shit out of them, of course.

I think there's little doubt Pedro should have come out of the game. Of course he's going to say he can still get it done, and only a fool would listen to him in that situation. I remember seeing an article about how Pedro's numbers like ERA and WHIP shoot into the stratosphere after he hits 100 pitches. Joe Torre clearly outmanaged Grady Little in that game, despite the fact that Little had the advantage on the field for most of the 9 innings.

True. But it's hard to change him without betraying the character and selling out to the more cynical, jaded audiences of today. Superman's "the big blue boy scout," and his moral code is straight out of the 40s and 50s, but that's a part of him that can't really be taken away. If Superman went on a killing spree against the criminal underworld of Metropolis, the movie would suck. Considering that pretty much everyone knows who Superman is and what he stands for, you have to leave the core of the character intact.