Mr. S£im Citrus

It was Tully, by the way.

Well, I've never seen the first Clash, so I'll have to take your word for it, but I recall the DDT being his stated finisher for the majority of his singles career (I'm certain that he used the DDT as a finisher at least during the Dangerous Alliance era, since I have most of that stuff on DVD), despite the fact that he was obviously most well known for his signature Spinebuster. On that subject, I always thought it strange that his Spinebuster was seen as a transition for much of his career, despite it being the one move that was clearly identified with him, and looked like a legit finisher for the late 80s/early 90s.

.... That's interesting... was there ever any public/on-air comment about the extent of their post-marriage relationship? Did they actually get along off-camera?

Yeah, that's about right, Landon... it's just a pet peeve of mine, to see two guys kickout out of pin-worthy sig move after pin-worthy sig move, only to win with something as relatively minor as a Rana. Plus, I'm kind of old school (which is probably a by-product of actually being old), and don't really like to see big-time moves, like the Dragon suplex (which, once upon a time, was considered a DEATH~! move) and the DDT, made into transition moves.

What was the story behind Savage and Elizabeth teaming back up in the nWo, and how was it played out on TV?

I couldn't get online much last week; I probably missed a lot of stuff... in that case, huzzah for continuity.... And, of course I'd point out your mistake, seeing as how WC's the guy that got out of the Snowflake...

Nice to see that the friendship between Cortez and Van Siclen is so strong, and equally nice to see him giving his old friend some advice... even if he is a fucking jerk that I wish would die... [/kayfabe]

... And, by “a few hours,” I meant after I got off shift, went to bed, woke back up, went back to work, went to PT, took a nap, ate, and then sat down to read the show… But, at least my internet didn’t go down tonight (for a change)… ========================== SWF Smarkdown! Live from Copenhagen, Denmark! Pretzler watches TV… and says stuff. I’m not sure if I understood how this promo started; am I meant to understand that Ghost Machine works dates for Ring of Respect, or did I totally read that wrong? Anyway, this is a solid promo otherwise; Pretzler bags on Toxxic’s submission holds, while putting over the Snowflake Clutch. There’s only one small problem with it, though: he says that no one to be put in the Snowflake has ever gone on to win the match, which isn’t technically accurate. Aside from that small nit to pick, a solid promo advances a storyline, so huzzah! Manson/Griffon vs. Hawke/Triple-J I see that King and LDP share my taste in women… Doesn’t take Manson and Griffon long to overpower their opponents, seeing as how they’re two of the few legit heavyweights in the fed right now, but the heels take over after JJJ hits the Rude Awakening on Manson… Manson retakes control with a rolling elbow on JJJ… I dig the dynamic where you have both Hawke and Johnson being reluctant to tag in against Griffon… Interesting departure from the norm by having the faces blow a run-in spot… Outstanding reverse rana spot by JJJ; a little out of character for a heel, but I definitely marked for that… The only real nit I have to pick with this match is that Hawke and Johnson don’t really seem to be on the same page, in terms of teamwork; they both seem to be attacking different parts of the body, without any rhyme or reason to it… I really, really like the way that the false tag spot was built up to… JJJ counters a schoolboy attempt right into the Frostbite, and that’s the match. Rolex presents A Moment in Time #1 This was notable for being the first-ever meeting between WC and Ejiro, and that’s all I have to say about that. Zyon vs. Todd Cortez “The fans go rapid?” Not sure what that means, but I guess it doesn’t really take anything away from the match… Action starts nice and fast, but these two are trading heavy bombs a little too casually for my taste… Todd and Zyon take the fight out of the ring, and a SICK guillotine legdrop spot over the barricade, which Zyon recovers remarkably quickly from… Boy, King sure is obsessed with the end of Martial Law… It doesn’t really make sense to me that Cortez should have to put his foot on the ropes to avoid a pinfall, considering the punishment that Zyon had taken to that point of the match, but that’s just more nitpicking… It’s a fun read, but this match reminds me too much of where ECW and WCW went wrong with Cruiserweight wrestling in the late-90’s, where they just had guys dropping their heavy bombs on each other… I do like the counter to the Miracle Ecstasy, although I thought that the Cyclone was something else… Overall a good showing by Zyon, and I hope to see him continue to polish his writing style. Rolex presents A Moment in Time #2 No comment. Johnny Dangerous vs. Mak Francis Johnny tries to get the drop on Mak, going for the MI Slam before the bell, and kicks off a match that moves forward at a frenetic pace all the way through… The flow seemed to fit the new attitudes of both men extremely well, although it rather seems like he made Mak into the de facto face, which I’m not sure I buy, since he’s actually done heelish things in recent weeks, whereas Johnny has just been slightly prickish by comparison… Nice to see Johnny go back to his martial arts background, as that’s an aspect of his character that he’s more or less ignored while tagging with me… The match seemed a little short, but that could have very well been a by-product of the incredible pace, and he even had time to work in some psychology to set up Ground Zero. Rolex presents A Moment in Time #3 Still nothing. Pretzler is “almost certainly” not a Nazi; that’s good to know… Just when things are getting good, a fan runs in and brains both wrestlers with a chair, and… hey, wait a minute… that’s not a fan; that’s Spike F. Jenkins! And he’s pissed! And he came back from his suspension a day early, so Flesher’s pissed, too! Taamo sends rent-a-cops down to the ring, but Diamond Dallas Spike runs back out through the crowd he came in from, and we have a reasonably entertaining no-contest. It seems as if this angle is headed towards a Cruiserweight Title triple-threat, which strikes me as odd, since I seem to recall Spike saying something about never wanting to have anything to do with the Cruiserweight Division again. Rolex presents a Moment in Time #4 + The Main Event that Wasn’t! Aaaaand I still don’t comment on my own stuff. The REAL Main Event: Danny Williams vs. ELM Since the match itself will likely be broken down better than I’m capable of, I’ll just make a few shoot-from-the-hip comments: Danny’s an intense motherfucker, isn’t he? I mean, you can tell that Mags meant to come out of the chute with a little intensity, but Danny snuffed that out almost immediately! ELM seems to be growing progressively more aggressive in each match, and he’s definitely pulling out all the stops in this match, but he can’t get the better of Deathwish tonight… This match looks like it’s on its way to being a glorified squash, until Danny misses the Big Elbow, and the experienced ELM capitalizes… But, even then, it doesn’t last long, as Danny just brutalizes Mags with power moves, and it occurs to me that I would totally buy Danny using elbows as a submission, like that Ultimate Punches submission in WCW vs. nWo Revenge: just back the guy in the corner and elbow him in the face until he tapped out… Danny kicks out of Dia De Los Muertos, and you knew it was over right then… and it was… ELM goes down clean to the Axe Bomber, and Danny wins the Triple Champ Round Robin in a sweep.

Thanks for the feedback, Mags. Yeah, I wanted to give this match a kind of PPV-quality feel to it, while still leaving the audience wanting more (which is kind of the objective of the TV shows), and advance storylines at the same time. I felt that the count-out win would leave things properly inconclusive, and to be perfectly honest, when and if I decide to make a run at the Heavyweight Title, I want my win to come on PPV. Not only that, but seeing as how Goodear was in the hospital with a real-life emergency, I would have felt like a real shitbag if I'd beat him for the belt, anyway. As far as the role reversal, given the fairly extensive history between WC and Ejiro, I felt as though it was the best way for me to handle it; these two know each other so well that it would be impossible to sell a "formula" match between them. Comments on the whole show in a few hours; sorry for not doing Lockdown, but I had extremely limited off-time last week, and just couldn't make the time for it.

Who?

Sorry about some of the strange wording in my match; I didn't realize until after I'd turned my match in that it wasn't the actual main event.

Yeesh! Hope you're doing better, man. If not, get well soon!

Everybody knows that Ejiro writes kick ass matches, but some people who've only been around since Fasaki v. 2.0 may not know that the Rule also rules at writing promos. With WC/Ejiro kicking off one mo' 'gain, I thought I'd post two Ejiro promos that helped to establish the rivalry back in the JL. So, without further ado: =========== Ejiro Fasaki, Why is he mad at WildChild again? Written: November 27, 2002 Ben Hardy sits in a high-backed chair as he sits in front of the camera wearing a red golf shirt and holding a clipboard. The lovable tool looks into the camera and breaks into a big toothy smile before breaking into a prewritten speech. “Welcome everyone to a sit down interview that SJL has been so gracious to allow me to present to you here today. My guest here tonight will be facing The WildChild in just a few days in a scaffold match, is none other than The SJL European Champion, Ejiro Fasaki.” The camera pulls back to reveal Ejiro is sitting next to Hardy in a similar chair, and wearing a Magnificent Seven football jersey and pair of black jeans. Leaning back on the chair, Ejiro folds his legs in front of him as Hardy continues to speak. “Ejiro, my first question has to be... what exactly do you have against WildChild that is so bad that you have to take your issue twenty feet above the ring on a scaffold. What exactly did WildChild ever do to you?” “What did WildChild do to me?” Ejiro shrugs. “Well, I guess it would just be easiest to let you know... that in the simplest terms. I just hate him.” “Hate is a strong word.” “Hate is a strong emotion, Ben. It’s actually a lot like love in a way. It can motivate you to do a whole lot of different things. It can get you up in the morning to train for hours on end. It can motivate you to do things that you didn’t think were possible for you to do. But most of all, it causes you to lose a little bit of control. You see, Ben. Love of wrestling, used to get me going each and every day. When I was cold, wrestling would warm me up. When I was hungry, wrestling would make the pangs disappear. But, after ten years in this business... you get to the point where love just isn’t enough. When you are continually passed over by the larger promotions... When you are put into the opening match over and over again... Eventually, the love fades. And that is when our old buddy hate steps in.” “But why is it centered on WildChild? Why him specifically?” Ejiro chuckles, “You think my hate is exclusive to WildChild? That’s a laugh. I hate Johnny Dangerous too. I hate The Insane Luchador. I hate Matt Myers. I even hate you. And do you know why?” Ben Hardy gulps, “Why is that?” “Because you and people like you treat wrestling in a manner that makes it and me look ridiculous. You prance around playing your little roles, pretending to be spies or punk rockers. Making me, making The Magnificent Seven, look bad. Just by being in the same sport as you.” “So The Magnificent Seven isn’t like that?” “Of course not.” “But I mean, Judge Mental and Fugue aren’t strait laced types either...they have gim...” “Don’t even say that word you worm. See it is comments like that, that make you look like such an idiot. Judge Mental has every right to wear the robes to the ring and call himself a judge, because he is one. Fugue has every right to act like he’s obsessed with music. Because if you spend any time with the man, you find out that is really what he is like. That’s the thing about us, Ben. We are what we say we are. People like WildChild put on an act for the people. Do you realize if WildChild acted like he does in the ring, he wouldn’t even be allowed in a restaurant?” “Because of the shoe thing?” “Yes, Ben, because of the shoe thing. So if you want to know why I hate WildChild... I guess that is it. And I am going to continue to hate him until he learns, once and for all.” “Learns what exactly?” “Learn that wrestling is a serious business. That it isn’t a place for playing games and ‘entertaining.’ It’s man on man combat and should be treated as such. Anything else is a waste of energy and time.” “So if you want to show WildChild how to wrestle, how come you’ve never faced him in a strait wrestling match? Every time you two have faced, it has been under some stipulation. Why is that, if you are trying to show WildChild how to wrestle?” “Let me tell you a story, Ben. Back when I was training in what a local promoter laughingly called a dojo I had a bit of a chip on my shoulder. I went around, mouthing off about how good I was, wrestling on the canvas. When one day, a new face appeared in the training hall. Seamed as though a young wrestler by the name of William Hearford came into the territory for a brief tour. “Hearford? You mean Judge Mental?” “That’s right. And he and I didn’t exactly see eye to eye at the time because I thought I had all the answers. But then, Judge Mental changed the questions. In a little altercation that I’m not even sure Judge remembers anymore, he took me down to the mat. Where I thought, I was king. And he showed me something. He pinned me the canvas in such a position that I would never have escaped at the time unless he allowed me. He took a young bronco like me and broke me. By beating me at my own game... Judge Mental had shown me a little glimpse of what it was really like to be a real wrestler.” “And what does that have to do with WildChild?” “See, WildChild doesn’t think he’s a mat wrestler. He thinks he can just fly around and brawl and not have care in the world. What I am doing, what I am trying to do. Is to beat WildChild at his own, sick, twisted game until he sees the light like I did all those years ago. Because there is nothing like the discovery that there is someone out there better than you at what you do best. And when I find out what WildChild holds most dear about himself... and destroy it. Then he will be free. Free to rebuild him self into something more, something greater. To the point where I can look him right in the eyes and tell him. I am not better than you, we are equals and we can BOTH prove it ===================== Ejiro's Last Word Written: January 21, 2003 You know, every once in I while, even I like to poke around the internet wrestling community and take a look about what people are saying about me and about my title reign at the top of the Smarks Junior League. It's a failing of mine I realize, but there is just a little piece of me that wants recognition from people who follow the business like a religion. I feel as though the amount of work and dedication I have put into my career entitles me to that little conceit. So I think you'll understand why, when I look at the net and to the hardcore fans I expect that little bit of respect. And so, when I look at my computer screen and see people claiming that I'm "nothing special and a little dull" I get just a little bit angry. So let me tell everyone a little story that I like to share with my closest friends every so often just to remind them exactly what is so very special... about me. See, a long time ago as I was coming up in this sport, I happened to have a match in my hometown of Sarasota. Florida. Taking advantage of the situation, I called up a person whom I trust and admire, and asked him to come down to the matches and take a look at what I had accomplished as far as my skills were concerned. He accepted the offer and watched from the crowd as I had one of the better matches of my career against a local wrestler by the name of Billy Roderick. After going back and forth for several minutes on the mat, I finally managed to snare Mr. Roderick in a Peterson Roll and held him down for that elusive three count. And man did that feel good. I had wrestled smart and well and got what would be considered a mild upset by the people that followed that territory. Walking backstage with my hands in the air, I just knew that my guest would be pleased as hell with my performance. So after the matches were done and we were heading towards the house, I turned to my guest and asked, "So what did you think, dad?" Turning to me slightly as he drove, my father said to me without a trace of malice or of hate, "Son, I don't think you can make it in wrestling." Looking at this man who had supported my wrestling career since the very beginning, I thought to myself that I must have made some sort of glaring error in the match that I had simply missed. Maybe my elbows weren't as snug as I had thought as they rattled Billy's teeth. Maybe I didn't snap Roderick over with the best snap suplex I could have. Maybe ... maybe I just stunk. I asked my father the natural question of what I did wrong and he told me. He told me that while my match had been going on, his eyes were not on the ring... but on the people that surrounded it. On the fans that had come to sit in a little sweatbox of a gym to see wrestling action. He looked at me again out of the corner of his eye and said, "I just don't think the fans cared that much about your match. And considering how much of your job entails entertaining them... I don't think you can ever accomplish what you want to." I sat in silence the rest of the road home where my mother was preparing some chicken salad and thought about what my father had said to me. And that is when I realized just how right he was. I came to the conclusion that night, that fans really just aren't all that interested in me or how I wrestle. Because unlike some people, I do what I need to do to win each and everytime I go to the ring. If that means I have to take a chinlock for fifteen minutes, that is what I will do. But the fans aren't there to see who wins and who loses. Oh no. They want a show. They want to see people like Johnny Dangerous dress up like a spy. They want to see Dace Night chasing other wrestlers around with a weed wacker. They want to see high flying clowns like WildChild flit about the ring and hope to land on top of something. But that is not what they see out of Ejiro Fasaki. Oh no. What they see with me is a wrestler who is actually out there competing. A wrestler that cares about winning championships and holding them. A wrestler that knows that a cross armbreaker is more effective than hitting someone with a chair! But the fans don't want to see that. They want the gimmicks... the violence... and the high flying garbage that WildChild breaks out every night of the year. It's people like WildChild that have kept me from getting the true respect I deserve. It's people like WildChild that fail to live up to the expectations of what real wrestling should be. It's people like WildChild that caused my own father to tell me I cannot make it in the wrestling business. So what am I to do? Quit? Oh no... I'll never quit. What I will do is simply destroy. Destroy those who make a mockery out of me, by entertaining those unwashed masses better than I ever could. Because no through it all, all I really want is to be recognized as the very best this industry has to offer. I just cannot do that with men like WildChild in my way... and so... on January 26th... at Malice in Wonderland.... I will remove WildChild from my path the only way I know how. To be better than him and to prove it.

:: shrugs :: I'm not criticizing anyone's opinions, it just surprises me; anyone who knows me will tell you that I'm a huge tag team mark, and while I've seen most of the teams mentioned in this thread (except for the puro), the Hart Foundation stands alone as my personal favorite. I didn't expect anybody else to rank them as their favorite, but it shocks me how many people didn't rank them at all.

Oy vey.

I can't believe that there are so many people here who think that there have been ten teams better than the Hart Foundation...

CIA! :: marks ::

Zyon, First, thanks for your feedback; I appreciate it. Now, for your remarks: - I can see your argument on where I used the Snap spot. My rationale for using it was that there was a considerable time lapse between when Zyon ate that bulldog and when he hit that Snap. I have an odd habit of "putting myself" in the matches I write, where I pantomime all the moves in order to get a sense of time; by my estimation, Zyon would have been out for nearly three minutes, which I figured would have enabled him to recuperate enough for one nip-up. - Regarding the submission, WC's pedigree as a submission wrestler has been established, ever since the Five Wounds match in the JL. Every several matches I like to have WC bust out a submission of some kind, just to remind people that he's not incapable of wrestling; it's just counterintuitive to what he prefers to do. WC's not going to out-wrestle a mat tactician for any significant portion of any match, but he's more than capable than using the occasional submission, and he knows that he can get them off most of the time because his opponents aren't going to be expecting them. Besides which, I didn't consider it necessarily to be a "conscious" decision; I wrote it that way because 1) I've always considered the Boston Crab to be a more fluid counter to a hurricanrana than a powerbomb, and WC wasn't in any position to hit a powerbomb anyway, and 2) because I wanted to do a spot that illustrated the difference in speed between WC and Zyon. WC's instincts would be to get out of the Cyclone and it just so happens that, from that position, the most natural way to get out would be to roll into the Liontamer. Again, thanks for the feedback; I'll try to do a better job of expressing my thought process in my matches in the future. - Dub Cee

Toxxic and Pretzler say stuff I’m afraid that I don’t have a great deal to say about this promo, aside from it being well written from a technical standpoint. There’s one thing that kind of rubs me the wrong way, though: as Toxxic begins this slow transformation back to a face, it seems as though he is becoming progressively more gullible, in the sense that, for someone who was so highly manipulative for over a year, he seems very willing to trust an old stablemate. It’s like he’s not only abandoning his old personality, but his whole character, and I don’t know whether that’s Toxxic’s own personal indictment of face characters (i.e. face = gullible), or if that’s just incidental, but I hope that it becomes clearer over time. Todd Cortez vs. JJ Johnson Well, you lost me for a second with that whole “nth degree” stuff (that sentence just reads weird to me), but a solid opening notwithstanding… Random thought: I just realized that Todd Cortez is the Arn Anderson of the SWF: he’s now held and/or defended the Tag Team Titles three different times, with four different partners; now that’s something… A springboard into a testes stomp? That’s just uncouth, man… Being recorded overseas must = no censorship? Isn’t Storm still supposed to be broadcast in the US? Anyway, nice teaser for the Riot Act Plus… Cortez channels Brian Pillman for a minute, which makes me smile… I like the use of the table shrapnel; it establishes Cortez as a guy who’ll make use of whatever, whenever he has to, and it’s an aspect of his personality that’s really been neglected throughout his run with Martial Law… Good job of actually putting over the blade job; far too often, I think I see people getting busted open and then going on as if nothing happened. Pretzler interview Pretzler speaks ill of the dead, because he’s EVIL~! Indeed… Good job in having Ben put Pretzler on the spot… Pretzler comparing himself to the Vice President is hilarious… Very good promo, overall; a perfect example of why every division needs a strong heel to help it get over. ELM and Toxxic say stuff Not much here; a quick, well done promo to establish that ELM wants a piece of the “3-time former Champion” action… Should be one hell of a match! ELM vs. Austin Sly I love witty banter between King and LDP… It occurs to me that a “House Rules” match really works against the heels… Sly works ELM over early, which would seem to put over the ring rust, except he’s been back for almost a month now, so I’m not really following that… Nice little comic relief bit with Sly digging under the ring; funny, but not overdone, which has been a problem with some in the past… Well, if Cortez is the AA of the fed, Mags is our Mick Foley; that was a cheap pop if I’ve ever seen one… I have to say, I’m glad that Sly came back with the chairshot, though; you can’t give somebody nearly two minutes to recover, and then don’t let something like that happen… Nice spot with Sly trying and failing to use Mags’ sign, and it has the added effect of setting up the psychology for the last four minutes of the match… I can’t help but notice that gaff with the squares, though; if sixty thousand raised red squares, that should have been a win for Sly, shouldn’t it? Zyon says stuff There’s something unusual about this promo that I just can’t put my finger on… it’s the kind of promo that could have been written almost exactly the same regardless of whether Zyon is a face or a heel, and I can’t help but wonder if he deliberately wrote it to be ambiguous as a means of keeping his options open for the future of his character… Ejiro vs. Ghost Machine King’s commentary in this match makes me think that he should have called the Balboa/Drago fight… King rips some of the goofier gimmicks in the fed’s “recent” past, and I’m surprised that Chance Silver gets no love; you know, the guy from “the Edge of Reality,” who claimed that his eyes CHANGED COLOR when he got mad… I have it on good authority that robots don’t have testicles, so that seems to be that, but I hope that it doesn’t kill Ghost Machine’s character… And then Zangeif gets the spinning piledriver off for good measure! The Young and Restless… I mean, Martial Law says stuff… So… as it turns out, Megan and Landon never happened, because her heart belongs to Todd… Cortez? Landon does a good job playing the jilted lover, and it doesn’t hurt that his ego is so big that he can’t fathom Megan not being attracted to him… I was a little irked by the inconsistent selling of the language barrier; if there are only pockets of fans who can even understand English, why is the cheering so loud? Interesting way to go about the promo, with Landon appearing to react to his own behavior as if he’s watching himself from outside his own body, but I would have liked to see a little more monologue to flesh this aspect out. Very good promo, overall; I wouldn’t go so far as to say that it establishes Landon as the #1 heel, which Toxxic was trying to argue (personally, I think that Pretzler’s probably the #1 heel by default at the moment), but some definite angle progression; almost looked for a second like Landon was going to be portrayed as a quasi-sympathetic character until that cheap shot. Promo/Toxxic vs. Pretzler I still don’t comment on my own stuff (although, I’d like to credit Ejiro for the co-write), so I’ll move on to the match… Interesting dynamic to start off, with two guys who consider themselves “above” hardcore wrestling that have a kind of gentleman’s agreement not to take advantage of the hardcore stip; reminds me of Summer Slam ’92 where Shawn Michaels and Rick Martel agreed not to hit each other in the face… At least I’m not the only person who forgot to use Viktor as a referee… Apparently, Nottingham-tanned = pasty white, so I guess Toxxic bruises easily; must not ever let Jet be on top… I’m hoping that “cissy” is a British spelling, but that’s just me nitpicking… Toxxic channels Muta with a Deathlock/chinlock submission… not surprisingly, Pretzler breaks the agreement first because, let’s face it, he’s a dickhead… Toxxic doesn’t appreciate getting played, and shows Fighting Spirit~! Pretzler isn’t really “lucha” enough for a bow-and-arrow, but that’s just more nitpicking… Interesting inner conflict with Toxxic resisting the urge to rake the eyes, and I wish we would have seen a little more of that from Toxxic the heel; a dickhead who’s too proud to cheat is a lot more compelling than a dickhead who thinks he’s too good to cheat… Toxxic takes a MAN-SIZED bump when Pretzler counters the Intoxxication… and then pays him back by beating him with a rollup… outside the ring… Toxxic takes umbrage, but Pretzler seems mostly unconcerned by it. WC vs. Hawke vs. Zyon No comments from me, but I’d be happy to reply to any feedback on what I wrote.

Does your version of Word have a spell/grammar check? I know that helped alleviate a lot of my run-on problems.

Hey, Drea said something funny, and I actually got it! :: wonders if this is the first stage of Alzheimer's :: Anyway, tight show; real comments after I've had a night's sleep. Or day's sleep, in my case.

Hey Tom, did those charlatans ever give you any feedback?

I don't like the fact that we already drafted him last year, when his name was Kevin Martin; why didn't Petrie try to get somebody that addresses a fucking need, instead of continuing this fascination with acquiring guys that can play in our "system?" There is no "system" anymore; when we got rid of Webber, Divac and Christie, our "system" failed to exist. How about getting somebody who's best skills aren't exactly the same as what we already have, for a change? EDIT - Looks like Chad Ford agrees with me; well, I guess he can't be wrong about everything...

I resent that! I'm not from Texas!

We used to put people like that away in my youth... and then, when people asked what happened to them, we'd lie through our teeth: "Where's Drea?" "She's... uhm... she's down south..."