The Amazing Rando

I am not schizophrenic. I am not a sufferer of multiple personality disorder. I am not depressed. I am not different from before. I am not guided by voices in my head. I am not taking it anymore. I am not insane. I am REAL. This chicken-scratch is shown on a piece of tattered paper, and in an instant – it is gone. The wind blows it away, and as the camera slowly pans upward, a man’s bare feet come into view, followed by the bottom of jeans, and suddenly it stops, interrupted by a voice from up above. Would you stop being so dramatic… The camera suddenly shoots up, revealing the smirking face of Alan Clark, looking smug standing in the center of the road, and some viewers might wonder whether or not even Alan knows where he is. Alan motions with his hand for the camera to follow him, and he slowly moves past a few busted up cars and stops at a bench, sitting down and pushing his bangs away from his eyes. The cameraman takes a moment to set up, and as it gets into position, Alan begins to speak. This week in Seattle…I became lucky and unlucky in the same night. Lucky, as I was to go into the ring with a former two-time world champion…the greatest world champion the SWF has ever known, and as many guessed – I could not get the job done. But, thanks to Tom’s small weight problem, I was able to hold onto my championship, if just for another week or so. Later that evening, I became quite unlucky…as I was walking backstage and stumbled upon a monitor – only to reveal Landon Maddix standing in the middle of the ring trying in vein to entertain the masses. I’m sure you all saw my reaction to THAT concert. It’s as they always say – eye for an eye, guitar for a guitar. I have heard reports of you claiming that somewhere inside of me happens to be what you have referred to as “The Real Alan Clark”. Well here I am to look right through this camera and right into your eyes and say… Yes, Landon Maddix, Yes. The Real Alan Clark does exist. Somewhere behind this smirk, this fun-loving guy, these scars, and somewhere drowned in all the blood I’ve lost in this business – The Reality is there. Something is telling me that it wants to meet you. It wants to hold you by the throat and tell you how much it loves you. How much it loves the way you moan in pain, or the way you tap out. How much it loves the way your body sounds when it strikes the canvas, or the concrete. But as much as it loves you…it hates you just that much more. Yes, Landon Maddix, Oh Yes. As much as I smile, and as much as I put on a happy face…I will never forget how much you have taken from me. You left me a loser. Now, I have no problem handling a lose…but when my last grand note in the SJL was left sour by YOU…well…those things tend to stick around in my mind. If I was Ghandi…and I gave peace to everyone in the world…I would still punch you in the face every time I saw you. If I was the richest man the world had every known…charitable, loving, caring…and I saw you on the street begging and pleading for food and shelter…you would take my boot into the back of your head. You see yourself as more than everyone else. You see yourself as above the world. Well look at me and understand that the Book of Todd means nothing in the real world. The Book of Todd is nothing but pure fiction in this reality – and like Icarus you float toward the sun, keeping your head high as you look down on the world and think you are free and perfect. But soon the heat becomes too much --- and like a rock you fall, and crash into oblivion. I may not be able to see into the future, Maddix – but I can see your oblivion. Every time I look into the mirror I see your oblivion staring me in the face. I am your oblivion. I am prepared. I am focused. I am guided by a force much greater than Todd. I am REAL. Alan’s eyes slowly close on the last words and his head lowers, a smirk slowly forms on his face…and the scene drops into static…and darkness…where the words “Window Pain – never forget the bloodshed” appear in bright red…and suddenly drip away, as if blood on the black screen.

for Dace and anyone else that cares...my stats got a slight tweaking in regards to "The Real Alan Clark" or whathaveyou... ...also expect a promo tonight or tomorrow morning on this development. EDIT: If Dace has already started writing...then it's not THAT big of a deal to make any huge changes.

*reads* Window Pain!? *reads* Toxxic and IL could be fighting during it!? *salivates* I'm so screwed.

unloco - Healing I bought it after a friend of mine (whose music taste I trusted) said it was good. Now, the two or so tracks he had heard were okay...the rest was pretty blah. I still trust his music taste, but I put it through more endurance tests before buying anything.

Either that or Benoit went on Trading Spaces and got a little over-zealous with the paint.

My favorite episode is still "The Chaos Theory" from Episode 2... even though reading the title you could possibly guess the ending, it was so great watching it unravel... I love watching the old seasons on Spike, because I barely catch the new ones. I would love to buy the DVDs if they weren't so damn expensive around here. I didn't get to see the end of the episode tonight that you speak of...or at least, I wasn't paying attention when they revealed the daughter did it, but it was who I was suspecting. One of the curveball type ones was the school bully getting killed, and the episode that had the "rebirth" on it... man...that was just freaky and I had a hard time watching it. Still-- awesome show.

next week...he becomes Johnny Legend...and an insta-feud is born.

Happy Birthday, Mark... invite us all to the party next time. (or maybe you did invite everybody except me and are just keeping it from me...it's okay, i'm used to it)

Oh...I forgot to mention "Cane Dewey" ... having just seen it on Foley's DVD, he mentions there (and in his book) that people thought it was the greatest promo of all time.... ...and if it's not the greatest ... it's pretty damn close. oh...and the Raw where Mick Foley did his "shoot" on the WWE as well as the Rock & Steve Austin singing a duet in the ring. Two priceless moments on one show.

it's hard writing dialogue for characters that aren't your own. I'm sure Landon will say the same thing, because in his 'birthday' promo I didn't think Alan sounded like Alan...but it still got the point across. I also wrote it pretty quickly and was going to have a bit more fan interaction and actual back-and-forth between the two men...but I thought if it went too far that they would actually start to fight out of nature...and I didn't want to take it that far.

Probably cause they wanted to make it "THE WORLD" ...and Japan just happens to be a part of that world.

FUCK! I'm such a bastard... i so knew that. I have NO CLUE why I was thinking X...

Right now i'm currently reading seven books (yeah, I know...silly) ... I scheduled out each book to a certain day of the week...and I read that book on that day for as long as I can, then I stop. I won't bother you all listing them...but when I get finished with them I'm going to go back and read some of my other books.

The end of the TBS/Taylor HIAC match Cyclone Comet's PRIME EVIL promo HVT's return in the wheelchair The final JL show...as bad as it was for me. EDIT: Fixed my fucking mistake. Oh...and i'd like to mention Todd Royal lighting a Mickey Mouse doll on fire.

The Search Is Over - Survivor How can I convince you what you see is real Who am I to blame you for doubting what you feel I was always reachin', you were just a girl I knew I took for granted the friend I have in you I was living for a dream, loving for a moment Taking on the world, that was just my style Now I look into your eyes, I can see forever The search is over, you were with me all the while Can we last forever, will we fall apart At times it's so confusing, the questions of the heart You followed me through changes, and patiently you'd wait Till I came to my senses, through some miracle of fate I was living for a dream, loving for a moment Taking on the world, that was just my style Now I look into your eyes, I can see forever The search is over, you were with me all the while Now the miles stretch out behind me, loves that I have lost Broken hearts lie victims of the game Then good luck, it finally stuck like lightning from the blue Every highway's leading me back to you Now at last I hold you, now all is said and done The search has come full circle, our destinies are one So if you ever loved me, show me that you give a damn You'll know for certain the man I really am I was living for a dream, loving for a moment Taking on the world, that was just my style When I touched your hand, I could hear you whisper The search is over, love was right before my eyes

*marks for Angle having the title under glass in his office*

That's cause RVD likes the minor leagues... mostly because sometHHHing seems missing.

Busting out the RACIAL VIOLENCE~

Big Show should've worn it around his forehead.

that was one WEAK ass "powerbomb" there...and Dupree was seriously blown up, too.

Dupree is DESTINED for the Main Event... he has the BEARHUG~ down.

Dupree learns lessons one and two of Smackdown... 1) Kidman isn't very over. 2) You can't powerbomb Kidman.

Tazz will become the new Jerry Lawler...and speak HIGHLY of Fifi's Puppies.

I think i'll stick with my earlier comments... make him a submissionist. His finisher will be no-selling everything till the opponent gives up.

I'd laugh my ass off if he turned heel and became a submissionist.