Nevermortal

Here's some of mine: During the last few months, in my circle of friends, we've had a "let's see who can fuck up the other guy's car the best" Car #1) Passenger, Driver's Side, and windshield covered in honey and adorned with copious amounts of teabags. Car #2) Bisquick, eggs, and milk on the windshield, piss on the doors, and marshemellow fluff in the doorlocks. Car #3) Baby powder on the windshield, roof, and rear window Car #4) Removal of license plates Car #5) Two "eyebrows" consisting of human hair and honey Car #6) Shit on the tires, body, and window So, there you go.

yellowhatandpostofficejacket Aside from being the KING FUCKING HECKLER of Ring of Honor, he's also saved babies from burning buildings and assaulted stupid fucking stupid fucking stupid fucking vegans.

See, this ruled.

My heel turn was funnier.

But that brought the "He's like Harvard in the summer: no class." line from Nowinski though. I forget, what did he say to Nowinski? Jeff hasn't had good times with the mic. Remember when he tried to cut the promo after wrestling Taker? His voice was all fucky and crackly. "YEWWW CAN'T BREAK ME TAY-KUR!"

MIDGETS DO NOT EQUAL FUNNY

Venom - Black Metal At about 1:50...after the chorus: "Lay down your soul to the gods Rock 'n Roll, Metal tenfold through the deadly black hole, Riding hell's stallions bareback and free, Taking our chances with raw energy" I love it.

Sarcasm? No, none at all. I swear. I'm laying it on thicker than frozen molasses here.

JeffFact: Jeff somehow got released by a company that keeps the Cat, Mark Henry, and Orlando Jordan employed.

Timmy's back! WHERE THE FUCK IS CHRISTIAN GOD DAMMIT!?!?!?!

He should go back to Ring of Honor, where he'll be accepted for who he is.

Meh. I'd rather see London in it than Malenko.

Huzzah.

It was completely in Norwegian. That shit's kvlt.

Christian ruled, he was a fucking viking. Remember on the RW/RR Challenge when he and LT (?) were bullshitting and so Christian said "Whassup my nigga?" and then that black chick got pissed off and started to beat him up? Great TV.

What's the proof on moonshine? I don't drink anything less than 80.

Yeah, I can support that statement. i will go ahead and third that. I'd fourth it, if I didn't see Rob with his hot-ass asian girlfriend in Philly. She was a piece of ass sent from the Gods.

Well if you guys were trve and kvlt black metal, you'd know that you're never supposed to perform live.

I hope some mofo gets the shank.

Any tips on how to kill someone quietly and bury their body?

With the way Tank fares in the UFC, I think I'd bet on Holly.

Good god.

Didn't he do it to HHH @ No Mercy 2000? Man that match was weird. They busted out so much new shit.

So fucking weird... Last night I asked everyone in the room who was watching the Rumble where Jack Tunney was, and my friend said that he thought Jack was dead. WHY AM I THE HARBINGER OF SORROW?

Boo-urns. Well, at least I have Puritannical Euphoric Misanthropia to cherish forever.