JJ Johnson

I personally want to apologize to anyone who devoted time to reading my match, because reading over it again, I have now resolved to write matches when I have gotten sleep, not as something to do when I can't sleep. I found the Buck/Pretzler match to be quite entertaining, partly due to the neat-ass stipulation, and partly because I chuckle reading the names of Buck's moves. Pump It Up, indeed.

You don't play much Resident Evil, do you?

I'm full of Colorado jokes. SO full of Colorado jokes, that if I learned anymore of them, my head would explode. Random guy: Hey JJ, I've got this great Colorado joke! *head explodes*

I'd count it. Would you count the trailer Kevin Nash lawn-darted Rey into as a weapon?

Two man kayak, ECW. Cactus Jack used it on someone.

Dude, totally. We handheld gamers haven't gotten a Mortal Kombat game in forever.

I thought they were in the Olympics in Mighty Ducks 2? Or was that just the World Championships? I do remember Iceland kicking everyone's ass.

My mistake.

Yeah, well...it's mongeese not mongooses.

*The zeppelin turns into lead and crashes. Led Zeppelin sues me for using zeppelin and lead in the same sentence.*

MAIN EVENT SWF HARDCORE CHAMPIONSHIP The Insane Luchadore (SWF Hardcore Champion) v. JJ Johnson All I'm saying is that being in the forest could make for some ka-razy spots. No Smokey run-in, because he lives in Oregon. Everyone knows that. TWO ON TWO MATCH Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix and "Urban Legend" Todd Cortez v. Johnny Dangerous and "The Dean of Professional Wrestling" Jay Hawke Dangerous and Hawke, because no one else said them. HOUSE RULES MATCH BUTTE DEATH MATCH Lil' Buck v. "The Critic" Scott Pretzler Well...this is certainly an interesting stipulation. I hope it's easy to swim with all that bling on, because Pretzler will win this. HARDCORE OPENER Ejiro Fasaki v. Arch Griffon Fasaki continues his win streak. Griffon continues his lose streak. None of the fans go streaking, because you know what they call good looking people in Montana. Tourists.

That's exactly why I used the term "assumed", despite that naughty little saying they have about assumption.

I too have no plans, although I would like to defend the Hardcore title, assuming I win Friday and retain it until then.

Another innocent child falls victim to the 24/7 rules. When will it end?

Quiet, you wankster you.

NOT SANTA!!! *cries* I'd cheer for him.

So...he's a time travelling gangsta wrestler?

Yay, I found an error. He won on Smarkdown. He has yet to compete on Storm.

Ten times zero is still zero. Say Batista had the slightest inkling of ring ability. That's a stretch, I know. Lesnar was infinity to the infinitieth power as good in the ring as Batista.

London's entrance music bites. In the history of him having entrance music, he has never had good entrance music. From his ROH Kill Bill commercial theme to his current theme (most recently used by Spanky), his theme has always sucked.

Wow, both Pretzler (my fellow heel from Ontario) and Cortez lost. Wild and Dangerous are gold hogs, ain't they.

Can Johnson capture his first piece of SWF gold???????? Yeah, Insanity. That match was brutal. Didn't someone get stabbed with a model of the Space Needle?

Not to mention the theme from Three's Company.

8 months.

Yeah, poor Timmy. Thanks for the feedback Toxxic and, to a lesser extent, Citrus. I'll definitely keep that in my mind writing this next match.