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JHawk

The OAO Wrestling Quotes Game

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Big John Studd was on some show (TNT I think) in the mid-80's, and he was attempting to bench 700 lbs. He had this to say about Andre:

 

"He might come in here and demonstrate a little wine-drinking to you, but he can't do this."

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WWF Superstars (Jan. 1987)

 

Andre the Giant: "I'm here for one reason only. To challenge you for the World Championship at the WrestleMania."

 

Hulk Hogan: "Andre, please, this can't be happening."

 

Bobby Heenan: "You don't believe it? Maybe you'll believe this, Hogan!"

 

[Andre rips the cross and T-shirt off of Hogan's chest.]

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Hogan, challenging the winner of the WM9 title match:

 

"I'm issuing an open challenge to either Bret, or that Jap, brother!"

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Saturday Night's Main Event.

 

Hogan: "The old Mr. Wonderful's back like he got a new paint job or something. Big deal! I'm the old battered-down, broken-down Hulkster that just keeps running better than ever man."

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From SNME:

 

(A teaser for the upcoming match)

 

Jimmy Hart: It's my first time, is it your first time?

Jim Neidhart: It's my first time, is it your first time?

Bret Hart: It's my first time.

All: IT'S OUR FIRST TIME!!!

 

Vince as Narrator: The Hart Foundation's First Tag Team Title Defense is Next!

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Guest Stunt Granny

"You want to remain employed, don't you?"

-William Regal on his knees in front of Vince McMahon as Vince is undoing his pants.

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Jesse Ventura to Tony Schiavone at the 1990 Royal Rumble: "After all the weight you've lost lately, how dare you call anybody a pipsqueak?"

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Saturday Night's Main Event (Nov. 1986):

 

Randy Savage: "I might have to make a pair of boots and belts out of that creature."

 

Gene Okerlund: "Damien? You're going to skin Damien?"

 

Savage: "No, I'm talkin' about, I'm gonna get me a Jake skin belt, yeah."

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Ric Flair (to Gene Okerlund, with Bobby Heenan and Mr. Perfect) following Royal Rumble 92:

 

"It's the greatest moment of my life. I want to jump, I want to party...but I gotta tell you like this: for the Hulk Hogans, for the Macho Mans, and the Pipers, and the Sids, NOW it's Ric Flair! And y'all pay homage to the man! WHOO!!!"

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Saturday Night's Main Event (Jan. 1987)

 

Gene Okerlund: "Come on in, Rowdy Roddy Piper. You've got a big one here tonight. No surprise, the "Adorable" Adrian Adonis.

 

Roddy Piper: "I'm gonna make this real short. I don't have a lot of words to say on this. This guy's (Adrian Adonis) humuliated me. I've made a lot of mistakes in my time. You don't get to where I am without making mistakes. It ain't a shame to get knocked down. The shameful part is not being able to get back up, Adrian. Obviously something you can do too. You're back. The fact that you're prostituting my work just eats me inside. The fact that I've got the chance to get in that ring to go get you just eats me inside. I ain't fighting for money, brother. I'm fightng for pride!"

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That's why this sports coat cost $800, and that cost $200! And I dunno what that cost... I'd be ashamed to wear it!
- Ric Flair to Tony Schiavone during an NWA interview

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Lex Luger vs Masa Chono in WCW

 

Tony Schiavone: "There's the mafia kick!"

 

Dusty: "Where do you get all this? German suplex, Mafia kick...he kicked him with a 12 1/2 boot right in the middle of the mush, that ain't got nothin' to do with the mafia! Hell, what you talkin' bout?"

 

Brain: "TONY! He KICKED THE MAN IN THE HEAD!"

 

Luger catches Chono with an elbow.

 

Tony: "There he goes, a back elbow!"

 

Dusty: "He just caught him with a Sicilian elbow!"

 

Brain: "Right around the Yugoslavian neckbreaker!"

 

Tony (trying to hold back laughter): "Stop it!"

 

Brain: "He kicked the man in the head, Schiavone! He kicked his Bosnian BUTT, how do you like that?"

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A TSM Favourite, tied in to Luger's match above. I bet I can still do this from memory:

 

Interviewer: Mr. Luger! Mr. Luger! I saw what just happened out there with Ron Killings. I just wanna know what's your plan for him at SuperBrawl Saturday?

 

Luger: What kind of disgusting, depic, despicable...(sighs) lack of respect does that Billy whats-his-name show? Bookin the Total Package in a match at Superbrawl? Super Saturday? What is it? I don't even know what it's called, what is it called?

 

I: Superbrawl Saturday.

 

L: Superbrawl Saturday? Can he even afford to pay me to wrestle Ron? I don't know! Gah! And your t-shirts are too tight too, Billy! And you book a match with me, against Ron Killings? Look at me! I'm the total package! I'm gonna rip him apart! I'm pissed now! (walks off)

 

I: And...

 

L: The door's locked, too!

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Sid : " All the skep....skep......let me do this again"

Jr. " We're live pal"

( Dibiase gets a " This guy is a dumbass look on his face)

Sid-" I'm sorry"

Wow, when was that?

 

Just wanted to clean this one up. It's been a hit with some buddies and I over the last few weeks. But one of them had never seen or heard it until Sunday, at which point he proceeded to watch it about 60 times. It was from the first In Your House, before Sid's match with Diesel:

 

JR: Sid, we all know that you can bring the heavy offence. But there's a lot of skeptics who think that maybe you can't take it. How do you address those skeptics?

Sid: Well, the ske...skep...skep, and all the people...people who...Lemme do this again?

JR: (surprised) This is live, pal!

Sid: Oh, sorry! Anyone has any doubts, will get their answer tonight! (pouts as JR takes over).

JR: There ya have it, Psycho Sid, a man of few words.

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Randy Savage, pre-match against Lex Luger at World War 3 in '95

 

Mean Gene: "You've got a problem with that arm, how is that gonna affect you tonight? You can't do it on guts alone!"

 

Macho: "I say I'm a million percent! That is better than a hundred percent!"

 

Gene: "A...million percent?"

 

Macho: "A million percent! I'm the kind of person that doesn't talk negative, I stay positive! Lex Luger, we've got a date with destiny, YEAH!"

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WM 6 -

 

Mean Gene: "Standing next to me is the Colostopy Connection..."

 

Heenan: "What did you call them?"

 

Mean Gene: "The Colossal Connection"

 

Heenan: "No you didn't"

 

Mean Gene: "What did i say?"

 

Heenan: "Nevermind"

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I'll jump ahead about an hour in the show:

 

Mean Gene: Alright, back with Bobby 'The Brain' Heenan. Family members dropping like the Berlin Wall. Bobby Heenan, I find you're tougher to get along with than my mother-in-law on a weekend visit to my house.

 

Heenan: Don't you concern yourself with getting along with me, I'm the easiest guy in the world to get along with! But when you're 7'4", and 550 pounds, and it takes two-and-a-half-hours for the blood to reach the brain, you don't think real right!

 

MG: Bobby Heenan, where do get the bal...the nerve to hit Andre the Giant in the face?

 

BH: I'll tell ya where I get the ba, the nerve! You take orders from me! I'm the head of the family! Ya listen to me? You go to the top! Don't listen to me, you're never heard from again! You have just committed, pal!

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WM8, during the Michaels-Santana opener (I'm paraphrasing here)

 

 

Gorilla: Big right hand, right in the kisser!

 

Brain: Did Santana punch Sherri?

 

Gorilla: He did not!

 

Brain: You said he got hit in the kisser!

 

Gorilla: Oh, please! Don't start!

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At the 2004 Hall of Fame, after accidentally saying "WWF": "You want wildlife? Share a room at the Howard Johnson's with Afa and Sika, the Samoans. That's wildlife!"

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Bobby Heenan and Lord Alfred Hayes are touring the Royal Albert Hall on some Coliseum tape (I think it's World Tour 92).

 

Brain: C'mon Alfred, I'm going to go use the...I mean, check out, the throne.

 

Alfred: The throne is not here Bobby, it's in the palace.

 

Brain: No, it's here, I saw it! It's porcelain!

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