razazteca 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 Well today in the mail I got a Jury Summons for next month. What should I expect? Should I act like John Cusak, and bring up the John Madden online gaming to get out of it? Or be like Pauly Shore and try to get a date with fellow jurors? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Bottled Black Report post Posted December 18, 2003 Ehh I had to go a few years back. Basically you just sit there all day waiting for them to call your name.. Then just have a good excuse for why you can't serve on a jury for whatever case it is. Or at least that's how it works in NY Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Salacious Crumb Report post Posted December 18, 2003 Remember, the secret is to tell them your prejudice against all races. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CanadianChris 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 Say you're prejudiced against all mankind. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Bottled Black Report post Posted December 18, 2003 Well I dunno how it works where you guys are at, but in NY that goes on your permanent records. If you're OK with that then go for it. If not then, if its a criminal case usually "I believe a cop above all else" works. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HarleyQuinn 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 My dad did one recently. Had to wait until he was called, found out it was a child molestor(said he couldn't do it due to being a father and not being able to be biased) so he had to wait more and ended up doing a quick trial where a guy bought an auctioned item and claimed it wasn't up to the price he paid for it. He of course ended up having to pay the auctioner the legal fees. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Salacious Crumb Report post Posted December 18, 2003 Well I dunno how it works where you guys are at, but in NY that goes on your permanent records. If you're OK with that then go for it. If not then, if its a criminal case usually "I believe a cop above all else" works. Misses the obvious Simpsons reference. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
razazteca 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 Maybe I can escape jury duty with the fact that I do not speak spanish. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest stardust Report post Posted December 18, 2003 Maybe I can escape jury duty with the fact that I do not speak spanish. Sadly, I laughed at that. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ace309 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 When they call your name, instead of saying "Here" or "Present," say "Guilty." According to News of the Weird, they once disqualified an entire jury pool because one guy did that. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NoCalMike 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 I did jury duty a couple of years ago and got on for a week long trial. My work paid me my regular salary, for basically being on a trial for 5 hours a day. Plus I was in the middle of downtown where all the action is during lunch hour(we got 2 hours for lunch). So to me, as long as your employer pays for it, it is damn well worth it to serve. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Man Of 1,004 Modes Report post Posted December 18, 2003 Don't forget the great United States courts pay you $10 a day for jury duty (exagerative, don't know exactly how much). Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
razazteca 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 Double rate of minimal pay? I'm so there, Pauly Shore only receive $5 a day in his classic movie Jury Duty. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Bottled Black Report post Posted December 18, 2003 I believe the going rate is actually $40, but you only get that if you don't get paid by your job. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sfaJack 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 Jurors here for Harris County (Houston) get paid, I believe, $6 a day. If you have to serve at the downtown courthouse and drive your own car, that $6 doesn't even cover your parking cost for the day. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Beeferton Report post Posted December 18, 2003 I've never been called yet and hope I'm not any time soon. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
razazteca 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 The is the 2nd time I had a jury summons, the 1st time I was able to get out of it because I was living in another town. It looks like this time I will have to serve jury duty because I no good excuses. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Beeferton Report post Posted December 18, 2003 The is the 2nd time I had a jury summons, the 1st time I was able to get out of it because I was living in another town. It looks like this time I will have to serve jury duty because I no good excuses. Say that you have many cops in your family and if you are picked up by an officer of the law, then you must be guilty. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
razazteca 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 I could say that I am a hippie. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JHawk 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 I got called in once but was excused for being a fulltime college student. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kkktookmybabyaway 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 (edited) Jury duty is a waste of your time -- I bitched about it once here and am too lazy right now to find out where it's posted... From this thread... OK, long story short. I was summoned during my final semester of college and I had a ton or so responsibilities in my everyday life. I went to the Pittsburgh courthouse and sat all day basically doing nothing. Then, with less than 30 minutes to go in the day this scumbag lawyer and prosecutor are looking over us. I pull out my most recent issue of National Review, making sure the scumbag defense lawyer would see it. However, it didn’t help because I was selected. The next three days were spent on a case where some guy with a beard about as long as I am tall fighting a DUI arrest. Well, only about 2 hours were spent actually hearing the case – most of the time we were all in this cramped little room doing jack sh*t. Oh I wish I had a Gameboy back then. Anyway, the highlight of the trial came when the defendant took the stand. When asked why he refused to take a breathalyzer or any other instrument to determine if he was drunk, the guy said all that was against his religion. Turns out he was part of an extreme Lutheran sect (BTW: I’m a confirmed Lutheran) that didn’t believe in breaking the skin (blood test) or doing whatever it is a breathalyzer is supposed to do. He also said his religion forbids getting pictures taken for driver’s licenses and proved it by showing his without a photo. When asked why is all this activity necessary the guy answered that these things are part of some New World Order plot. The Prosecutor then grabbed the guy’s pocket Bible and asked him to look up and justify what he just said. Later on, when the scumbag defense lawyer was questioning his client, the judge turned away to go over some paperwork for some other case and the scumbag lawyer went up to the stand and began whispering stuff into his client’s ear. I will never forget this exchange as long as I live. DA: Objection your honor. Judge: *looks up* On what grounds? DA: He’s talking to the defendant! Well, when we went to deliberate there was one woman that didn’t want to vote guilty because she felt bad for the hippie. Another woman didn’t want to vote guilty because she said all cops lie and didn’t believe the cop that testified against the defendant. Another woman didn’t even care what we did and spent the whole time saying how cute the prosecutor was. A guy that originally was to be our foreman didn’t want to be anymore when he found out that the defendant lived in the same community as him. Being the fearless leader that I am, I took the job because I wanted to get the hell out of there. All in all, jury duty was the biggest waste of time I have ever experienced and the only time I will ever be on a jury again is if it’s a big-name trial and I can get a book deal out of it. So when you get your jury duty summons write on there that you’re a card-carrying member of the ACLU or Fry Mumia fan club... Edited December 18, 2003 by kkktookmybabyaway Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Metal Maniac 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 I've often wondered what would happen if, upon being called for Jurt Duty, you told them that you honestly did not want to do it, and if forced to do so, you would vote the opposite of everyone else, no matter what the evidence said, just to fuck the whole trial over and waste everyone's time. Can you get in trouble for stuff like that? For outright refusing to do it for no valid reason other then "I don't want to"? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Golgo 13 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 I was called in a couple years ago. For the original date, I made up an excuse where I was gonna be out of town, since I just didn't feel like doing it then. A couple months later I went in. I sat there for all of ten minutes before I was selected to be an alternate. After 1 or 2 of the first 12 left, the judge went over the trial for a bit, before we alternates were allowed to leave. So I was back home and asleep by noon. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mystery Eskimo 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 I've done jury duty, and I enjoyed it. I guess if you really like your job you should try and get out of it, but in my case it was a welcome and pretty interesting break Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Giuseppe Zangara 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 I've been summoned five (5) times in the last three years. That I'm a student got me out of it everytime. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Just J Report post Posted December 18, 2003 It really depends what the trial is about and they have to pick you first. But I was on a capitol murder jury about 8 years ago. This guy shot his girlfriends aunt after he and the girl had a fight. It was a very interesting case. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MrRant 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 Why didn't you tell him that the cops were coming? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Just J Report post Posted December 18, 2003 Why didn't you tell him that the cops were coming? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
haVoc 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 I just got the form in the mail two days ago I had to fill out. They won't be needing me though. I have two DWI's on my record. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord of The Curry 0 Report post Posted December 18, 2003 One word that will save your ass from getting on the jury: Lie. Lie like a motherfucker. Lie like you've never lied before. It worked for me when I got summoned back in October. I told them that it would interfere with my work schedule, that I wouldn't get paid for time missed by my work (which is true) that the bus route required a 40 minute walk to the station and that I'd have a difficult time making it down for the trial. Lies, all beautiful lies. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
