Things you learn from the movies...

[Guest I Got Banned for Sucking]

79. When a middle-aged woman arrives home to her suburban home from a car trip, the first thing she does is drop her keys on the bench and take a shower.

 

An unwelcome middle-aged man will then often show up.

[Art Sandusky 0]

In space, no one can hear you scream. However, if any other noise is made, you'll hear it.

[Nighthawk 0]

Everyone from England is flamboyantly gay.

[Guest I Got Banned for Sucking]

82. Locks break when shot at, always ricocheting away from the firer.

[Guest Fook]

77. KFC puts an addictive chemical in it's chicken that makes you crave it fort-nightly.

 

How can you hate the Colonel?

[Cran Da Maniac 0]

If you are on a rag-tag team, eventually your team will become good and win the championship

[Exslade ZX 0]

- the last sumarai was an American

I believe he was referring to Tom Cruise.

[Guest netslob]

77. KFC puts an addictive chemical in it's chicken that makes you crave it fort-nightly.

 

How can you hate the Colonel?

aye, i hate the Colonel...with his wee beady eyes...

[Ravenbomb 0]

- the last sumarai was an American

I believe he was referring to Tom Cruise.

Bah, my movie's better

[justsoyouknow 0]

Large weaponry has little to no kick-back.

[Guest Man Of 1,004 Modes]

If you are on a rag-tag team, eventually your team will become good and win the championship

Didn't work for my 7th grade Soccer team...

[River City Rocker 0]

83. When a young couple is being pursued by a killer or any kind of monster through the wilderness, the woman will almost always fall down, suffering an apparently serious injury. She then will tell her companion to "go without her", which the man will almost always disregard.

 

84. A black monolith appearing at the foot of an old man's bed will help evolve the man into a higher form of life.

 

-Ben

[Guest Seven Sins]

85: you can dodge traffic, you can dodge a ball

86: you keep what you kill.

[razazteca 0]

Fat guy and skinny guy comedy team = box office gold.

 

Video games don't translate well into good movies.

 

If it is a cop movie then either it will be a black and white buddy film or somebody is retiring that day.

 

Type casting is a good thing........if you fight it you will regret it i.e. not every comedian can do drama.

[Yuna_Firerose 0]

If it is a cop movie then either it will be a black and white buddy film or somebody is retiring that day.

Or you have the "my father/mother/aunt twice-removed was killed in such-and-such mission, and I shall brood for 90% of the movie" type of deal.

 

87. If there is a black person in the movie, then there will be quite a few corny/repetitive black jokes made or, if it's a drama, corny/repetitive insults. Because, ya know, every black person in the movies are abused and live in bad conditions.

 

88. In every mainstream movie that I've seen that contained a gay character in it, they ALWAYS fit the stereotypes. Either they're outrageously flamboyant and flaming, or they're portrayed as "normal" people...read, dull. Also, they sometimes - not always - go through some kind of torture: beating/insults/whatever.

[DangerousDamon 0]

89.Shooting someone with twin 9mm pistols makes them fly 50 feet in the air.

 

90.Leatherface is fast. VERY VERY Fast.

[Guest Man Of 1,004 Modes]

91. There will be another 10 friday the 13th movies because of the success of F v. J

[JHawk 0]

92. If a woman can play any sport on a comparable level with men, she is either ugly as sin or a lesbian. Possibly both. They are only bisexual in Ben Stiller movies.

[Guest wrestlingbs]

93. In disasters, there will always be the bad guy. He is usually an authority figure, like a captain, police officer, or government official (maybe even president). When the shit hits the fan, he betrays everyone else to save his own skin. And, like an idiot, everybody still tries to save him, even though it's revealed that the disaster was partially/all his fault because of ignorance, greed, or just plain evil.

 

94. Non-suspecting tourists will lways stumble upon a small town's horrible secret, even though it's been going on for years and not one authority figure has suspected something was wrong.

 

95. You can outrun a car, even though it' going 60 mph and the fastest recorded that a human can go is 25 mph.

 

96. Saving people, or the world, is the fastest was to sobierity. Forget AA.

 

97. If you're born rich, you're either an idiot or a snob.

 

98. Even though everybody there is an expert in the field, at least one guy will exclaim: "Are you saying that..." or "So basicly, ...." in order to keep the audience in check with the third-rate plot.

[Ravenbomb 0]

99. Lemmy is God (Airheads)

 

 

100. Takashi Miike is a twisted motherfucker (Visitor Q)

[Guest netslob]

101. women faint very easily.

 

102. every faculty member in a school is either corrupt, racist, or indifferent...except for ONE.

 

103. the principal or dean of a school is always ridiculously uptight and will act overly SHOCKED at even the slightest hint of rebellion.

 

104. if a girl is a tomboy, she is ridiculously hot. and no one will notice.

 

105. the janitor of a school is the smartest person in the building.

 

106. earning a black belt in any martial art takes a matter of weeks.

 

107. Danny Elfman does the music for every movie ever made.

 

108. Clint Eastwood can never stop squinting (even in the dark).

 

109. no matter how much he runs around and uses up energy, Jack Black will always be overweight.

 

110. Tom Cruise is gay.

 

111. unless Kevin Smith is directing, or Matt Damon is co-starring, any Ben Affleck movie is gonna suck.

 

112. Gene Hackman is good in anything.

 

113. same goes for Deniro.

 

114. YOU DO NOT WANT TO FUCK WITH JOE PESCI...i cannot stress this enough.

 

115. if a pop-singer is the star of the movie, it will suck...especially if it's even loosely based on their life.

 

116. if Bruce Willis is in a movie, at least 10 other characters will die, and their will be a minimum of 3 explosions.

 

117. same goes for Schwarzanegger.

 

118. any movie featuring a professional wrestler will suck.

 

118 a. except for "Roadhouse"

 

119. Gary Oldman will always play the most eccentric character in the film.

 

120. same goes for Nicholson.

 

121. every Nicolas Cage movie will have at least one scene where he is whining about something.

 

122. Nick Nolte will always look like he just got out of bed...after a night of heavy drinking.

 

123. if Tim Burton is directing, the movie will be weird...and have LOTS of fog.

 

124. same goes for Kubrick (minus the fog).

 

125. same goes for Ed Wood (minus the quality).

[Guest I Got Banned for Sucking]

134: Whenever someone bends down in a public basin to wash their face, when they lift their head back up, some bad mofo's gonna be in the mirror.

[theintensifier 0]

126. If someone is being chased by someone else in a car they will always run in a straight path and most certanly get hit.

 

127. If the main good guy and the main good woman hate each other when they first meet, they will eventually fall in love, and one of them will die before they can get intimate.

 

128. The hero will find a way to stop the most unstoppable villian known to man.

 

129. The main character will not only stay conscience, but be able to whip the guys ass after he gets beat down to the point where he should have been KO'ed. (FC when Lou meets Tyler in basement)

 

130. When someone is running from someone else, they will trip over something.

[lomasmoney 0]

131. Mega-villians always want to blow up major cities and/or countries. In some cases they want to start an all out nuclear war between many countries that will likely cause all of humanity.

 

Where exactly are they gonna be when the bombs start flying ??

[Guest I Got Banned for Sucking]

141. Australians have an unknown accent.

 

(This is what number we're up to. Count them).

[Yuna_Firerose 0]

Well, since we're discussing actors/actresses...

 

142. Almost any character Johnny Depp plays will have a quirk. Whether it's subtle or outrageous, there will always be at least ONE quirk.

 

Hey...I'm a fangirl, and proud of it ^.^ So there.