T-shirt sayings that you can't stand

[The Czech Republic 0]

List things written on shirts that make you want to beat the crap out of the wearer. Some of mine include the "Hot Topic" kinds of shirts:

 

I HAVE ISSUES

 

I HAVE AN ATTITUDE PROBLEM

 

I DO WHAT THE VOICES IN MY HEAD TELL ME TO DO

 

THE VOICES IN MY HEAD ARE LAUGHING AT YOU

 

IT'S ONLY FUNNY UNTIL SOMEONE GETS HURT...THEN IT'S HILARIOUS!

 

These are generally a great big cavalcade of suck. Every time I go to Woodfield, I walk into Hot Topic, make fun of people, and leave. I'm so cool.

 

These are most often sported by the male population. Females are not exempt with:

 

PRINCESS

 

SPOILED LITTLE PRINCESS

 

DADDY'S LITTLE GIRL

 

EVERYONE LOVES A (insert ethnicity) GIRL

 

Stupid sayings across your shirts makes checking out your breasts not even worth it sometimes. See also: sweatpants. These are all pretty lame, but there's been a lot of these weird shirts with those little bathroom door people providing step-by-step instructions on

 

HOW TO JUMP OUT OF A MOVING CAR

 

HOW TO BREAK UP WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND

 

HOW TO GET INTO A FIGHT

 

I hope you get into a fight, lose, get thrown out of a moving car, and get dumped by your girlfriend. It'll suck but at least your shirts shall guide you through it!

 

Carry on if I had any notable omissions.

[Fuzzy Dunlop 0]

Camouflage shirts that say "Ha... now you can't see me!"

[Mole 0]

I've seen way too many of these.

[Fuzzy Dunlop 0]

How did those become so popular, anyways?

[The Czech Republic 0]

What do you think?

[Lord of The Curry 0]

Any and all t-shirts that the teen slut crowd wears.

 

"Bitch"

 

"Diva"

 

"Rock Star"

 

"Porn Star"

 

"Godess"

 

"Flirt"

 

"Tease"

 

I'd rather they be less subtle and wear shirts that say "Feed it to me"

[Art Sandusky 0]

Camouflage shirts that say "Ha... now you can't see me!"

And fat people wear these, making it even worse.

[Giuseppe Zangara 0]

Any shirt involving a confederate flag and some variation of the saying "it's heritage, not hate."

 

Racist assholes, all of them.

[CanadianChick 0]

The fucking stupid "Hot Stuff" and "Bitch" and the such type of shirts that LOTC pointed out. I just love the "Player" ones the girls wear. Do they think it's empowering? Stupid skank, you're just pretty much telling guys that you're easy. Teenage girls are probably the stupidest people ever. Except for me, of course.

[KanadianKrusty 0]

During school I saw emo kids wearing t-shirts with shit like "I'm a freak" written on it and a bunch of stupid "no one loves me" slogans, pretty much every metalhead wanted to punch them and that more or less started the MAE movement at my school (Metalheads Against Emo).

 

On a side note, there was a guy who wore a "pornstar" t-shirt eho bears a striking ressemblance to Ron Jeremy, quite funny.

[DerangedHermit 0]

I also hate those bootleg shirts at the flea markets (like there's one at a flea market near me that says: "This is your brain (random team's logo), this is your brain on crack (team's rival's logo)"

 

And also those piece of shit shirts that are in forms of a jersey; i.e.

[Guest Anglesault]

 

They're classy AND witty!

 

Just not!

[The Czech Republic 0]

I knew this thread was begging for an Anglesault contribution. Those are pathetic! WHY don't they just spell out "Killing" so they can get they guy's name right? If I wore any Red Sox shirt, I would make my own featuring the Bear-Shark diatribe. I hope Sawx fans have the dignity not to wear such stupid shirts.

 

Oh here's another Yankee-related thing I hate, but not a shirt, per se: "fashion" jerseys and "fashion" caps. Things I've seen at sporting goods stores:

Ghetto-fied Yankees jersey (the script liek on Torre's jacket, with 69 as the number of course, d00d!)

Yankees jersey in POWDER BLUE with white pinstripes

Plain Yankees jersey with the name on the back. Hmm. Interesting.

A light pink Yankees cap. Pale freaking pink. There was also a neon green Tigers and red Dodgers. WTF. Don't screw with established team looks for any reason.

 

I'm glad we've been able to unite in hate for "Princess" shirts.

 

Other things I hate:

Confederacy-supporting apparel in states that border the Great Lakes.

 

Green Bay Packers camouflage. Yes. I've seen it. This makes perfect sense if you think about it though, because A) Wisconsinites are always out shooting things, and B) they better hide from pissed off Bears fans. But seriously, Packers wear in everyday situations defines you as a hick, and camouflage in everyday situations defines you as a hick...so do these come together with a synergistic effect to dress some sort of uber-hick, one previously thought to exist only in theory?

 

Old, worn out, hole-ridden Dale Earnhardt shirts. Enough of those. You'd think with his death + the gredy whorism of NASCAR, there'd be a deluge of new #3 crap y'all can buy.

 

The Pink Floyd Dark Side Of The Moon t-shirt. Enough. If you wear that shirt, you better be prepared to tell me your favorite track off DSOTM, give an explanation of what YOU think "Any Colour You Like" is supposed to represent in the grand scheme of things on there, and to tell me if you care for the earlier and later stuff. Gotta eradicate the posers.

[the max 0]

Because with a Bostonian accent, the 'G' at the end of 'Schilling' doesn't get pronounced.

 

As in: "Curt Schillin's pitchin' today." It's the way the accent works. Almost all 'G's get dropped at the end of 'ing' words.

[The Czech Republic 0]

I did not know that. Thanks.

The shirts are still laughable.

[the max 0]

Oh, no doubt they're laughable, but I think we're all laughing for different reasons.

 

I'm mostly laughing because I actually know people who would wear one in public.

[The Czech Republic 0]

The Test shirt:

GUNS DON'T KILL PEOPLE. I KILL PEOPLE

[Guest Anglesault]

Because with a Bostonian accent, the 'G' at the end of 'Schilling' doesn't get pronounced.

 

As in: "Curt Schillin's pitchin' today." It's the way the accent works. Almost all 'G's get dropped at the end of 'ing' words.

Sort of like how Javy Vazquez will spend the rest of his time in NY without anyone correctly pronouncing his name.

[Kardo 0]

"You laugh at me because I'm different. I laugh at you because you're all the same"

 

I laugh because those t-shirts are mass produced.

[NoCalMike 0]

I pretty much concur with everything already said. Basically those shirts were probably acceptable for the first 10 or so folks wearing them, but there are just too many out there now.

[Rob E Dangerously 0]

Camoflague in like orange makes no sense, where the fuck will you hide, a fucking leafpile?

 

I've seen Confederate flag t-shirts with "These colors don't run".. I never did tell that person "You know you guys lost, right?"

[NoCalMike 0]

I always found it hilarious that when the Porn Star shirts first started getting big when I was a Senior in highschool(at least in my area), half the girls didn't realize the "Porn Star" was just a company logo/name, and though they were actually coming off hip and trendy by wearing a shirt with "Porn Star" on it.........fucking bimbos.

[Guest croweater]

Not quite a t-shirt slogan, but I once saw an extremely obese girl walking down the street with "Juicy" and "Girl" embroided on each cheek of her ass cheeks. The jiggling ass only added to the effect

[1234-5678 0]

What about "Lifeguard"?

 

Man I fucking hate that shirt..........

[The Czech Republic 0]

15 miles away from the nearest swimming pool, I'm glad I know you're a lifeguard.

[Der Kommissar 0]

I always found it hilarious that when the Porn Star shirts first started getting big when I was a Senior in highschool(at least in my area), half the girls didn't realize the "Porn Star" was just a company logo/name, and though they were actually coming off hip and trendy by wearing a shirt with "Porn Star" on it.........fucking bimbos.

 

Could be worse. I once saw a girl, who looked like she was about 12, wearing a shirt that said that. That was just screwed up.

 

I pretty much second most of what was said in this thread, though I'd like to add any saying put on the ass of pants. There is nothing like seeing a girl walking around with 'Princess" or "Bootylicious" on their ass. I just don't get that fashion statement at all.

[1234-5678 0]

15 miles away from the nearest swimming pool, I'm glad I know you're a lifeguard.

The shirt is still hideous walking on the beach.

[kkktookmybabyaway 0]

Was at the grocery store this weekend and some middle-age wrinkled skank had some shirt on that read "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful." I laughed...

[Zorin Industries 0]

The amount of trendies wearing t-shirts with Soviet emblems on them is REALLY pissing me off, especially when the majority of them are completly clueless of what any of it means

[1234-5678 0]

I have a problem with white kids wearing yellow or baby blue "FUBU" or "Rocawear" shirts.