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HollywoodSpikeJenkins

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Yay for me jobbing to Strangler and such.

 

Oh wells, this is my 100th post under this name. That's kind of a neat thought.

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Guest Aecas

Congratulations to Stranglah, and thank you for introducing Vlad to the world of motorized crime :headbang:

 

And now I've off to start my new job so later all! Have to read the rest of the show tonight.

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Guest Suicide King

Well damnation. My hat is off to you, Toxxic.

 

Now my comments on the matches I marked. First and foremost let me say what a joy it was to mark Ced and Munich's matches. they were truly epic in scale, but personal in reading. I don't know if I have ever enjoyed reading two matches more than I did those two. The rest of the evening, particularly the USJL title match where both competitors actually bothered to send me something, paled in comparison. ;)

 

Anyway, on to the USJL match. They were very close. I know that some other markers would have given it to the other guy. But I thought Manson wrote a better match, and I will say why. His match was shorter, and the ending was rushed, true. Everything else was better though. Max King wrote a longer match, with more action and a better ending. Where did he go wrong? Description. Manson's was spot on, using the correct amount to communicate what was going on in the ring. Max used hardly any, and when he did it was insufficient. He instead moved from spot to spot. The markers cannot be expected to have memorized everyone's named moves on the roster. You can't just tell me that wrestler A hits move B, and expect me to understand the significance of it. And when you are trying to demonstrate that a heel is arrogant, you can't just say he is in fact arrogant. just like real wrestlers, you're telling a story. you need to act arrogant. to be fair, King did a fairly good job of that, but where he didn't it was noticeable. couple that with an awkward flow, and you have a good but disjointed match.

 

This was an instance of quality over quantity, but only just. if either writer did even one or two things differently, I can easily see it going the other way. I do hope King gets a rematch, because he clearly worked hard on his match.

Edited by Suicide King

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Guest Suicide King

I think Z forgot a promo as well. I seem to recall a certain someone telling me he wrote one for the show...

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Guest Ghetto Bird

Well, it stinks to write for nine hours straight in what turns out to be a wasted effort, but 42nd Street wrote a hell of a match, and I take nothing away from them.

 

Uhm... for the benefit of those of us not familiar with the history of NTD, what's the deal with him and pants?

 

 

Oh, and Strangler returns, and returns are always cool!

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The promo that was missed has been added at the end of the excellent #1 Contender's match. I uh... just happened to have a copy.

 

Please read it.

 

Show comments later when I have a chance to review a little closer, but on first glance: Way to go Toxxic!

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Well firstly, I'd like to congratulate "The Superstition"...

 

(Snickers)

 

...I mean, "The Superstation"... On his dominating return and victory in the Mall Brawl. But I have to say one thing:

 

My Indians have a more recent Series crown than yous! Nomah left for the Cubbies! How do ya like them apples... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!

 

But anyway...

 

First card I've really taken a hard, close look at since I've slipped back into the boards, and I'd have to say I'm liking it pretty decently. The matches all seemed to have a lot of promise, and some damn good quality to them despite the enormous word counts.

 

However... And this is a big however...

 

The fact that only two people wrote for the Mall Brawl??? Default wins in a PPV???

 

C'mon, people... I might not have been around for a while, but I was in the league at a time where we had not one, but THREE leagues because we had a shitload of talent! To have a PPV with as little writing done as Z says there was (or wasn't, as the case may be)...

 

It's inexcusable, unconsionable, and it's an insult to the markers and grand-poobahs that toil away in the back-scenes trying to make this E-fed the best damn thing under the sun.

 

Having just read Big J's posting, it's understandable that people have their moments where they just don't "feel" it... Where their real life nabs them away from this little violent respite we have here.

 

Heaven knows, I can relate. And I will relate again, if duty ever sends me away from my happy little niche here in the hole-in-the-wall I call my dorm room.

 

And my comments above are in no means meant to slight, degreade, or insult people (like Janus) that have just gotten a little burned out and tired of the grind. That happens.

 

The comments above ARE for those of you that talk a big game, that want to have the world in the palm of your hand... But seemingly don't put in the effort.

 

The rules are simple, folks:

 

Write your matches, hone your skills, and you'll do well.

 

Slack off, not write... Might as well go home.

 

And yes, I've fallen victim to this in my time here. Such is why I've waited so long to come back, and also why I'm taking my time.

 

So I'll get off my soapbox now. Anyone has a problem with anything I've said... (Shrug) Sorry. But free speech is what I fight for everyday in my job. I'm entitled, just like all you are.

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Short-ass comments from the short-ass Aussie!

 

Not sure if I like TBS winning the Mall Brawl. More people should've written. ;)

 

Manson retains, but we'll see if Davis dethrones him eventually (Y)

 

Waiting on part two of Maddix/Johnny, but I'm crossing my fingers that Maddix won.

 

Dace is the NEXT contender to the World Title! Hoorah Mr Fucking Night! \m/

 

MARK IS ON THE ACTIVE ROSTER!? *has a heart attack* Evil bastard, King. (Y)

 

Was rooting for the Bird and GOdrea, but 42nd Street edged them out and retained.

 

I'm interested to see where this argument with Mike/Todd/TMM regarding who the 'real' champs are will go, how it'll affect matches.

 

Big ups to Toxxic for becoming World Champion. *congratulatory screwdriver*

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Guest Horse hockey!

Wow. Glanced over the show and it looks good.

 

I guess welcome back is in order for both Strangler and Stevens.

 

Nice, improved match from Candace.

 

Wish Hunt had been able to show. The Hardcore match might have had some real action in it. Damn that thing they call the real life. I had so much planned for that match, too.

 

Congrats to winners, but most of all..

 

 

 

 

 

 

WOOOOO!!! TOXXIC! Awesome match, bud!

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Pfft... King you noble bastard... you didn't have to delete my post correcting you. ;)

 

I did make comments in there too!

 

Awesome show dudes. Congrats to Manson on retaining, and Toxxic to winning the big one. Great matches all around.

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Comment time! This is random crap I think of as I read a match, so take it with a grain of salt.

 

MALL BRAWL V!

 

OMSNAUSAGES IT'S STRANGLER! Frost and Leon Sharpe cameos? Awesome. Dustin tricking everyone with the fake gold balloon is a great twist, and the big brawl over it was a nice spot. NTD HAS PANTS! MIDGETS FIGHTING IN AIR VENTS! MIKE TYSON USING BIG WORDS! The one thing that would've made that better would be Danny Williams (the wrestler!) knocking Tyson out with an elbow. Petey and Dustin fighting in penguin suits is great. Oh my god, Martin Lawrence? Runteldat! I saw the 'survey prize is the balloon' thing coming from the time it was introduced, but it was still pulled off nicely with the Yankee fan winning it. Holy fuck, it's Cutthroat! Oh man, this is nuts. That's the most fun I've had reading a match in a long, long while. Kudos, Strangler. You've still got it, you old bastard.

 

Awesome little John Duran promo, as he wants to get back into the main event and prove himself. Well, it's about time, Duran. Win the title again, or something.

 

CANDACE vs. ...THE SNOW DEMON!

 

Well, your writing has improved, but some of the detail is unneeded. For example, Funyon's attire and how much it costs = unnecessary. Still, the description feels a little polished. Again, it's better, but you need to work on your transitions - it's just the little things to get from spot to spot so it doesn't read so much like "missile dropkick, arm drag, buzzsaw kick". Nice to see you've got a good grasp of the commentators, as well. The interaction between Frisco and Cortez just seems forced and awkward. I'm all for seeing low blows in matches, but it's odd that the referee doesn't notice it. Also, you might want to rethink using a diamond cutter as a finisher - we already have Ace Lezaire and Manson using it as a finisher. The 'top rope to the outside' spot needs some better description, because I can't tell exactly what it was. A superplex? How does she 'dive' out of the ring? Again, it's just a little awkward. The finish...well, the finish was unique, at least. Still, I don't get why the referee didn't disqualify one of the parties for the amount of interference they did. Solid second effort, and as long as you can improve your grammar and transitions, you'll be good to go.

 

OH SHIT, THE THREE MOST CHARISMATIC SUPERSTARS EVER EXPLODE!

 

Great, great interaction between Todd, Mask, and Mike, written superbly by Mike, if I do say so myself. The tag title situation is getting increasingly interesting, and I'm glad to be a part of it.

 

THE BIG CUNT AND THE BIG BLACK GUY DO IT HARDCORE!

 

Well, that certainly is a...long-winded opening to the match. I understand real life got in the way (believe me, it's happened more than once to me), but 1.5k or so for pre-match stuff is kinda nuts. And, hey, for what the match is, it's good. Neat double team by Spike and Sean, and a big bump to cap it off. It's too bad you couldn't flesh out the match more, because I like both characters (Hunt & Davis that is. Spike sucks). I'd like to see a rematch.

 

Cool promo video for the USJL Title match!

 

A VETERAN! A ROOKIE! A PRESTIGIOUS CHAMPIONSHIP! AN UNWITTY TITLE!

 

Again, seeing Manson motivated and writing matches again is so neat. Pretty pedestrian start, but it quickly picks up. The commentary is kinda blah, but it's not a big deal. One thing that struck me as funny: "(Comet) The fans, this crowd coming alive for MANOSN!" You should make Manosn one of your nicknames. It'd be awesome. Anyway, like King mentioned, you have a good amount of description, and you tell a good story in the ring. The finish was kinda out-of-the-blue, but it worked with the context of the match. Again, if you had time, you probably could've fleshed it out a bit more, but it's still a good little match.

 

 

And that's the first half of the show. I don't feel like reading 40-thousand more words right now, so the last three matches will have to wait until later.

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Alright, I've edited in the second part of Maddix's match, and I've given Mark's promo its own post -- it now happens just before the main event. Whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, retcon!

 

I'll make some brief comments myself, too...

 

- Strangler's Mall Brawl is pretty great, all things considered. He actually asked to be edited into the card after I'd already booked the mall brawl, and I figured "eh, what the hell" and let him get his way. I'm glad I did, as it prevented the match from being a default win, as depressing as that is. Anyway, you can see that TBS hasn't written a match for about eight months, but it's still got a ton of high points. My favourite spot was probably the Cutthroat spot, and anything involving the Yankees fan. Golden.

 

And this was essentially a one-night-stand, guys, so don't worry about it.

 

- Obviously, I also think a round of applause is in order for Toxxic, who seemed destined to walk out of this PPV with the belt, and that's pretty much what happened. The match in itself is very, very good, although I honestly felt it was overlong, and was very difficult to read at times. In my mind, the whole match is just a statement of how far Toxxic has come and how fast he's gotten there. It's the MOTN without any question (Right, Dace?), so everyone should read it.

 

- Congrats are further in order for Davis, who impresses me more every day, Manson, who needs to keep this shit up, Landon, who needs to never write a match that long again, and 42nd Street, for being 42nd Street.

 

- And just so everyone is clear on it, No-Show Count: 11. Not cool, guys. Not cool at all. That is embarassing.

 

Card will be up pretty soon.

 

-Z

Edited by realitycheck

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Guest Horse hockey!
THE BIG CUNT AND THE BIG BLACK GUY DO IT HARDCORE!

 

Well, that certainly is a...long-winded opening to the match. I understand real life got in the way (believe me, it's happened more than once to me), but 1.5k or so for pre-match stuff is kinda nuts. And, hey, for what the match is, it's good. Neat double team by Spike and Sean, and a big bump to cap it off. It's too bad you couldn't flesh out the match more, because I like both characters (Hunt & Davis that is. Spike sucks). I'd like to see a rematch.

Yeah, the opening was written before life got in the way. So if I'd gotten a chance to include all the stuff I'd had in mind, I'm sure the 1.5k opening would have seemed miniscule in comparison.

 

I was going to comment that school is starting back up soon, and I think we're going to see some waning content in matches. I thought I was going to be one of them, but it turns out that I'm too good for my job! So I no longer have one. I'll be a writing demon! Watch out, now!

 

Now back to comments.

 

EDIT: I'm all for a rematch when Hunt is ready.

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Toxxic, you son of a bitch! Nice work and congratulations. Get Spike his cruiser belt back and you guys will be Team Dickhead numero uno. Enjoy the prize, it's fun as hell.

 

I love both of the tag teams in the tag match a whole helluva lot. So much so that I'd kill to see an 8-man (and woman) tag sometime in the near future - 42nd Street and Birdrea vs. Van Siclen and RevZero, maybe?

 

Welcome back Grand Slam! Having a guy who's out of shape and had no intent of being back in action back in action is a pretty unique angle. Since he's squaring off with Duran on Storm, I'll also mention here how much I liked Duran's promo. He's been quiet, but this was an excellent example of a simple character choice helping push a solo storyline.

 

I've only skimmed things, and honestly probably won't get a chance to make more comments, but congrats to everyone who wrote, and urine to everyone who didn't. Zing!

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Quick comments of doom, with detailed shit to come later of some sort.

 

Congrats to Strangler for putting together a solid Mall Brawl. So many no shows (4 out of the 6, if my memory's right) is not good. Petey probably shouldn't have been on the card anyway, James is unreliable, Dustin hasn't been seen around for ages and I'm assuming it was Vlad who also no-showed as he was having problems. Still, credit to Strangler for putting together a Mall Brawl worthy of my laughter.

 

Duran's comeback = markout~! Seriously.

 

Solid if unspectacular stuff from Candace. Credit still that he showed for the PPV. As long as you stick at it Candy, you'll improve I'm sure. Indeed, this was an improvement from your first match and in all honesty, you're a very good writer. We have high standards and you're meeting them.

 

The MVS/TMM/TD stuff is great. Mucho great. I smell a Todd/TMM face turn which would do the SWF no harm at all, considering the face ranks are pretty weak now.

 

Credit goes to Davis for doing something with the Hunt no-show. Sure, it wasn't a great match. Hell, it wasn't a match at all really. But by continuing your storyline you get plus points. Not sure on Hunt's story for no-showing so I won't comment.

 

Nice hype from Manson and a very solid match. I'll admit, when I came back from my week off I wondered what the hell had happened when you had the belt. But you've proven yourself with the belt and I'm impressed with ya man. Keep this up Manson and you'll go far my friend.

 

Ooh...promo and hype video from me. And my match which is decent enough I guess. Oh...and it is LOOOONG. Seriously...it didn't look that long on WordPad, I swear. Course, I wouldn't have wrote 16k if I'd known the troubles Johnny had. But there ya go.

 

Well...the Tag Title match isn't next. That'll teach me for not reading the card properly... Of course, Dace won by default but from what I've read it's still a very good match as usual. The usual come as you are, no bullshit, no gimmicks match you get out of Dace. And I mean that in the best possible way. Looking forward to Toxx/Dace at Genesis and I'm really torn between who I want to win.

 

Hey, it's the tag match! Close enough. Usual Masked Man mix of complete madness and great action...taken over by Cortez, who did a marvelous job. The OAOAST would be proud. :P Great match and I really look forward to this TMM/MVS/TD love triangle moving into Genesis.

 

What can I say about this. A King appearance and GSMS back on the active roster? That's a mark out folks. And nice to see the legends back for Genesis...

 

Which brings us on to the big one. Kudos to Toxxic for making his match look a more 'normal' length than I did. Oh, and of course for writing one HELL of a match. Major congrats of course on winning the title in such a short time-span. You deserve it man. Now hold onto it and we'll all be happy.

 

 

All in all another very good show with the unfortunate amount of no-shows...even though some were understandable and you can put reasoning to others, 11 is still FAR too many. Congrats to all who won. Credit to those who wrote. Yay Toxxic. And did I REALLY write that much?

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So, yeah. Just things to get off my chest...

 

I was meaning to go much further with the match than 4k when I originally wrote the first 2000 or so, as I've said. Leg work by Icon was to come in at some point around 4k-5k, when Manson's knee started giving out due to the wear and tear of the longer match. Meanwhile I didn't intend to stick the arm work/Rings of Saturn in the match at all. It was a convenient out, basically.

 

About the only thing I had planned was King figuring out the Consequences, with one or two more planned attempts where he counters it, before I have to resort to something else to get the win. If I were able to get 2000 more out of it, I would have. I also feel guilty about kicking out of his finisher, as bad of a botched attempt as it was. This was also a convenient out in the rush to get the match done.

 

Maybe more detailed comments later, but for now congratulations are in order for Davis, Landon, Toxxic and 42nd Street, along with all the other winners. I never expected Strangler, and though I had an idea both King and Grand Slam would show up, I never expected either to be back on the roster.

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So I decide to do full on reviews of the show. Might as well as start with the big one. Just call me “Scott Keith Lite”, even though I’m not a fat Canadian or anything. Though Zed is. Here is Part 1 of My GZ Review~!

 

 

- The Smarky Rant Thingy for SWF Ground Zero 2004!

 

- Your hosts as Cyclone Comet and Bobby Riley.

 

- I wasn’t booked for this show. Want to know why? Z sucks. There, I said it.

 

- Opening Match: Mall Brawl V

Austin Sly vs. "The Corona" Vladimir Everheart vs. Edward James vs. Petey the Irish Penguin vs. Ryan Dustin vs. ???

 

That crazy Mall Brawl stipulation. Who doesn’t love it? And our first ??? Man of the night is none other then…Cutthroat! Interesting…wait…no…it’s The Boston Strangler! Well, after the announcement of Cutthroat, it seems like a let down…but Strangler isn’t THAT bad. And Vlad takes the lead! The rest follow with only Sly taking a elbow from TBS. And everybody goes into separate directions. Sly attacks TBS from behind and THE CHASE IS ON~! TBS and Austin brawl for a bit, but Sly ends up face first into some extra cheese pizza’s. Hmmm…pizza…on the third floor, Petey and the Celtic Misfits run into an “As Seen On TV” store. While trying to find the balloon, he runs into the two owners of the store…LEON SHARPE AND FROST! Both are apparently broke, and need to sell their T-Shirts/Frost Brand Products. I could go for a cigar right about now…Anyway, no luck for the Celtic Misfits. But they now own a couple of Frost Brand Honey Hams. Vlad looks for the balloon, but is stopped by some annoying women who want to take a survey. NO THANK YOU! A brawl breaks out between Petey and Dustin on the second floor, which ends with Dustin on his back…after an Artic Atomic Drop. Sly and James continue brawling in the food court, but both men are taking down by a SUICIDE PENGUIN PLANCHA~! Ryan Dustin is back up, and heads into a Sears, where he finds the GOLDEN BALLOON! But it’s not the one with the ticket. Damn. Vlad heads into a Foot Locker to find nothing, but Strangler! A shoe was begins, as Nikes, Reeboks, and everything you can think of get thrown around. Vlad cheats like a mofo, and spikes a pair of cleats into Strangler. Ouch. Before the war can continue, RYAN DUSTIN HAS THE BALLOON! AND EVERYONE IS AFTER HIM! OMGPILEUP2K4INSIDETHESEARS! Everyone fights for the balloon…as Dustin leaves the store. Everyone fights for the balloon, with Sly getting it, popping it…AND NO TICKET. Bitches. Everyone goes after the balloon as Sly runs into NTD. NTD tries to hide his package, but it is revealed. HE LIKES PANTS! NOOOOO! This leads to an emotional breakdown for NTD, and the whole world weeps for the guy. He only wanted to wear pants. WHY CAN’T HE WEAR PANTS? Dustin heads into a sports store, looking after the ticket…only to be KA-PLUKED with a baseball bat from Mini-Edwin! Dustin no-sells it, and chases after the little fucker. But he is stopped by the SAME WOMEN trying to take the survey. Dustin no-sells her, and gives chase to the Mini Man. NO THANK YOU! Dustin chases Mini-Edwin into a vent, only to be attacked by Wallace McHaggins! When the Celtic Misfits attack! Dustin no-sells it though, and goes after Edwin in the vent! Wallace tries to help, but gets stuck in the vent. You fat fuck. Dustin finally catches Edwin, and the vent’s break and they go through a table! They both make it to their feet; only to find out they crashed into a Mike Tyson autograph session. Oh no. Petey runs in to save his Misfit, and Dustin gets the hell out of there before Tyson can do some serious damage. TBS continues his search, with Sly right behind him in a security cart! SLY HITS TBS! But he no-sells it. A car hit him, dude. We’ve all heard the story a million times. Hell, he’s probably telling it to someone right now. TBS tries to attack Sly, but VLAD TRIES TO RUN THEM BOTH OVER WITH A DURANGO! They dodge out of the way, and THE CHASE IS ON~! Sly and TBS make it to the escalators before they get killed though. But Vlad is right behind them. THE CHASE IS ON~! Strangler tries to run away, but is stopped by THE SURVEY WOMEN. BITCH, PLEASE! NO THANK YOU! Strangler gets past her, BUT RUNS INTO A YANKEES FAN. He tries to do the gentlemanly thing, and help Strangler up. But that no manners Boston fan refuses. As Strangler runs away like a little girl from the Yankee’s fan, the Survey women asks the fan if he wants to take the survey. He agrees, like a gentleman, only to be knocked over by Ryan Dustin. Dustin, who is being chased by Mike Tyson, gets the hell out of there. The fan gets back up, but Tyson knocks HIM down. Damn. All this hate because the Yankee’s rule the baseball world. The fan gets up, and is finally aloud to take the survey. Thank you. Still running from Tyson, Dustin charges into a costume shop. With some quick thinking, he throws on a Petey the Irish Penguin costume! But the obvious happens, and he runs into the REAL Petey the Irish Penguin, if a real Petey existed…Anyway…Tyson prepares to kill both of them, but is on the receiving end of a low blow from Mini-Edwin! Petey and Edwin get the hell out of there, as does Dustin after a cheap shot on the former Heavyweight Champion of the World. Edward James searches through the bookstore, but finds nothing. He then destroys some literature, before eyeing Austin Sly who apparently is chasing after something. THE CHASE IS ON~! Sly found a golden balloon, but it is being held in a giant crowd. Sly goes for it, but Eddie J tries to stop it by releasing hundreds of gold balloons into the mall! Doing this comes at a price though, as he pisses off Comedian and Co-Star of “Bad Boys” and “Bad Boys II” and the star of his own comedy show “Martin”, Martin Lawrence. Martin points out white Eddie is, and EDDIE ATTACKS! Backbreaker Crucifix Powerbomb! And Martin is out! The crowd boos Eddie, but cheer when Sly attacks! SLY FACE TURN! SLY FACE TURN! Sly then tries his turn at comedy, which is pretty bad…SLY HEEL TURN! SLY HEEL TURN! Eddie hits a reverse DDT on Sly and heads for the balloons. The rest of the SWF Superstars come in AND IT’S BONZO GONZO! As the fight over balloons go, Strangler runs into the same Yankee’s fan from before…HOLDING A GOLD BALLOON! He apparently got it for doing that survey…man; did they botch that or what? Strangler tries to take the balloon, but gets a kick in the nuts for his trouble. RED SOX SUCK! The fan tries to run away, but ends up being chased by the entire SWF roster (at least those in this match) and ends up letting go of the balloon. After some hijinx, Vlad ends up with the balloon. As he is about to win, Edward James knocks out Matt Kivell! A ref bump in a Mall Brawl? We are all going to hell. This starts a chase for Eddy Long, as TBS grabs the balloon. THE CHASE IS ON~! After a small collision between TBS, Dustin, Vlad, and Eddie James, Austin Sly grabs the balloon. He spots Eddy Long and we are on final rundown. Sly pops the balloon, grabbing the ticket as everybody is chasing him. Just as he is about to make it, Ryan Dustin with THE SPEAR~! Everyone shows up and fights over the ticket, as it is CLUSTERFUCK2K4INTHEMALL! After a Wallace Cannonball and a Mini-Edwin Slip-N-Slide, Petey gets the ticket. He rushes over to Long. WE HAVE A WINNER! NO! WE DON’T! IT’S NOT EDDY LONG! IT’S REALLY…Cutthroat? What the hell? He wants revenge and he is going to win this Mall Brawl! Cutthroat wins a match? Not very likely, as he is stopped by Mike Tyson and Martin Lawrence. And good night, Cutthroat. At least he wasn’t locked in a bathroom this time. Eddie James gets the ticket but is stopped by a Space Flying Tiger Dropkick by Dustin. Petey, TBS, and Sly all battle for the ticket as VLAD RUNS THEM OVER WITH THE DURANGO! Matt Kivell finally wakes up as Vlad grabs for the ticket…BUT TBS IS HOLDING IT! TBS wins Mall Brawl V @ 24:05. I don’t rate Mall Brawls. But this one was crazy fun, even though a little predictable at times. A slow start, but it got going into the middle and end. A fun time had by all, and a nice One Night Only Return for TBS. Too bad the Red Sox suck.

 

- In the back, John Duran wants to be put back in the main event scene. Zenon won’t allow it, and tells Duran to beat someone worthwhile. Duran thinks of someone, and what a surprise, we don’t know who.

 

- ??? Vs. Candace

 

Frisco opens the match up with some cheap heel heat against the Texas crowd. Whatever floats your boat, I guess. The second ??? Of the night is…the returning Mike Van Siclen! Returning from his Hawaiian vacation. Is he still one half of the tag team champions or not? His tag partner, and half of the tag team champions, Todd Cortez, accompanies Siclen to the ring. Siclen offers a handshake, but instead slaps the taste out of Candace’s mouth. What a dick. Mike continues to act like a dick, only to receive a dropkick from the Female Fatal Fury. Arm drag and a slap on the returning Siclen. Kick is blocked, but an enziguri and a diving dropkick to the face keep Mike on the mat. Buzz saw kick and rolling thunder get two. Mike fights up, and brings Candace down to the mat. Stalling brainbuster gets a close three on Candace. Sit out jawbreaker gets two. Guillotine Legdrop is stopped by Frisco, but Cortez is here to save. Candace comes back with a dropkick and a low blow, followed by a hurricanrana for two. Small package gets two. Candace works the knee over, locking in a STF. Mike makes the ropes, only to receive a rolling thunder on his leg for a one count. Candace goes for a Diamond Cutter, but Mike counters with a clothesline. Mike bails, only to come back with a DDT. Mike goes up top, but quickly rethinks it. This allows Candace the time for a breather, as she hits a low blow and a Diamond Cutter. She makes the rookie mistake of heading to the top rope instead of going for the cover, and is stopped by Todd. Instead of Mike getting DQed, Todd gets a warning. What is that? Candace recovers and goes back up top, but Mike is waiting for her. Mike heads up top, but Candace counters WITH A SUPLEX TO THE FLOOR! THEY ARE BOTH DEAD! A Pier 7 brawl breaks out between Todd, Frisco, and Lobo. Mike and Candace somehow get to their feet before the ten count, but Candace MISTS~ Mike and he isn’t able to beat the count @ 7:12. Didn’t flow very well, and the lack of selling hurt it. No reason not to end it after the Diamond Cutter, and the top rope suplex to the floor should of killed both of them. Did we really need a count out on a PPV? And why wasn’t Mike or Candace DQed after all the interference? It started telling a good story with the veteran Mike trying to keep the upstart Candace from her speedy offense, but lost it towards the middle. *.

 

- Mike decided to give us some promo time after the match. And about 10 seconds in, takes a quick jab at Revolution Zero. Not smart, Mikey. He calls out Masked Man, who comes out to a pop. They both go at it over whom the true tag team champion is, only to be broken apart by Todd Cortez. Cortez says that he will defend the tag titles with MM tonight. But after the PPV, Mike will get his title back. They all argue, which draws out Zenon…to repeat everything Cortez says. But if Team Flip Flop wins the tag titles, Hollywood Boulevard gets the rematch. Not 42nd Street. I must admit. This intrigues me. Except Masked Man. He sucks.

 

- SWF Hardcore Gamers Title: Martin “Big Country” Hunt © vs. “The Perfect Storm” Sean Davis

 

A hype video for the main event starts us off before the match. Davis is a member of Revolution Zero, the greatest stable in the past 3 months. Interesting line here by Comet, "Maybe there's an intricate plot to hold down Spike. That might explain why he lost the Cruiserweight Title so quickly." I agree. They start the brawl at the top of the stage as Hunt makes his entrance. The challenger wins it and hits a tackle. David begins to drink from Hunt’s bottle of Southern Comfort, enraging the drunk, allowing him to clip the big man. Hunt hits a flurry of punches, but a baseball bat shot is reversed. The show finally picks up as SPIKE~ comes out to a deafening pop. The crowd LOVES Spike. He congratulates Davis on his title victory; even though the match isn’t over…they agree to work as a team again. This allows them to work together and nail Hunt with the Perfect Spike to give Revolution Zero the Hardcore Gamers Title @ 4:47. Not much of a match here as things never really got going. Pretty much a squash for the monster of Rev-0. Does this mean that Toxxic will walk out with the World Heavyweight title? Only time will tell. ½*.

 

- A nice video to set up the lineage of the USJL Title and for the upcoming title match.

 

- SWF United States Junior League Title: Manson © vs. “The Icon” Max King

 

Kelly introduces Max and his entrance takes FOREVER. King goes for the single leg takedown, but Manson stops it with clubbing forearms and a knee to the face. Manson gets two arm drag takeovers and a knuckle lock, but Max fights to his feet and gets a thumb to the eyes. King pounds on Manson, hitting a lariat that sends the champ to the ground. Rolling neck snap that is an ode to Curt Hennig by the challenger. Manson fights back with a couple of elbows and knife-edged chops, and a earth shattering kick to the spine. Manson hits two suplexs for a one count. Manson with a go behind, but King breaks out of it and hits his own suplex. Short arm clothesline gets one. King gets a bear hug, but Manson HULKS UP~ and elbows his way out. King bails, but comes back with a low blow thanks to a little distraction from Kelly. School boy gets two. A Fujiwara arm bar by the champion counters the go behind by King! You mean to tell me, that Manson knows a WRESTLING MOVE? He can do something other than an elbow? King makes it to the ropes, ending the arm bar. King fights to his feet, and hits a backbreaker. King Buster gets two. Both get to their feet, and the challenger blocks a Consequence, but gets locked in the Anathema and Manson retains @ 7:24. A lot of brawling with no real flow. Person A hits Person B with move. Person B fights back to take control. Person B hits Person A with move, etc. The arm work was strong, though a little lacking. A good title defense, nonetheless. **.

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Ok, here we go. Oh jesus this is gonna KILL me (the last PPV took 7 hours straight and over 3 hours was actually writing this lot out)

 

1) Mall Brawl - Lots of Mad People.

 

Little comedy style intro that sets everything up. And shows it's gonna be a nicely writen number.

I do like it starting off almost like a track race then breaking out into Mall Brawl goodness.

Bwahaha @ the classic camemos from Sharpe and Frost, always a good touch in comedy matches like these.

I mark for Petey's balacony dive from the second level onto Sly and Eddy J.

The shoe fight thing is another smooth big of comedy here as well.

Iron Mike Tyson as well? Someone's breaking out all the stops here. And hey, it's a comedy match, it should be funny and all that.

The little paraody with the secuirty cart that plays of Janus' Mall Brawl and Strangler no selling a car before is a great little one to bring chuckles. Best psych you'll find here.

The Mike Tyson runnign joke rocks as well.

The mass of golden ballons is a niffty little thing to add some tension to this match and make the outcome hard to see.

Brining back the survey as the source of the ballon as well is another good running gag.

And the ref getting laid out just stretches out the finisn even more. It's almost working on the same story base as a real wrestling match, with false finishes during the race to the finish.

And bwahahahahaha @ finally bringing in Cutthroat like that....what a twist.

Good comedy match withing being an OTT cluster fuck.

 

Rating: C+ for all the gags and funny goodness.

 

2) First Promo - Duran and Zenon

 

John Duran wants back into the ME.

And he's going to be someone to prove he can still hang with it.

 

3) Singlse Match - Candace vs MVS

 

Description's picked up a little this time around but still needs more work on the detail and all to make it feel better.

The pollitcal way of getting heat is a nice slighty different touch though.

Slightly fair comment about AJW but there was Aja Kong...and Candace sure doesnt feel like a Joshi.

Action still feels a little thin and jerky, lacking description of the finer details.

A lack of selling from one section of the match to another as well. The damange gets done then just seems to fall away.

Some of the adjectives really over do it at times. Convaying damage is one thing, but it's a balance to strike.

Todd knocking Candace off the ropes should have been a DQ.

As should have the outside brawl.

Improvement yes, but probably still needs more work. Mainly just in picking up the style and all that.

 

Rating: D

 

4) Promo Time - MVS and crew

 

MVS finally having to address the issue of the tag titles and him just running off.

TMM gets called out and claims the Tag Belt should be his and it brings out Todd as well.

They argue about the belts intil Zenon comes out to lay down the LAW folks.

Hmmm, this angle is 3 way goodness folks.

 

5) Hardcore Title Match - Sean Davis vs Martin Hunt.

 

Maybe a little overkill on the intros, might have been covered in a promo. But this is PPV so what the heck. Not like you're filling up words now.

Just kicking the champ down, stealing his belt and his booze is a good little heel touch. Nothing majorly flash or wrestling based, but it makes for good heat. It's the sort of little idea the greats like Flesher use to big effect.

Spike pops here and we've got a good old run in folks.

Double team blow, it's over folks, new champ.

A PPV rush job...bah, but at least the writing's good.

 

Rating: F+

 

6) Promo - Video Package

 

Little hype number for the USJL Title match. Past champs and all that.

Hyping the recent events of King and Manson to get to this place.

Can never have enough hype now can you.

 

7) USJL Title Match - Manson vs King

 

King's ego trip character is kept up and it's all good. I can see a lot of good fued things being done with King and Kelly.

Very smoothly worked opening set piece, standard but effective and showing Manson has a more than fine grasp of the basics when he's on a roll.

The description's been worked on as well. There's a soild base to it, nothing overly flashy or flower but there's just enough here and there as the match goes on.

A nice slow build as well, with first cover not even getting a count, giving a lot of room to work with.

Also, while Manson's incontrol here, it means it does look like King is getting plasterd to much either.

It seems a pretty paced match centered around the strike exchanges that carry everything along between the bigger spots while still having some meaning.

I like how the Fujiwara gets to be a nice focus from the selling point of view, with King trying to shake it off, but not being able to hit his finisher full on so Manson can kick out.

And the arm leads into the finish, from the less than full on King Buster meaning Manson doesn't that long to recover.

A passible afair overall that I know Manson dragged out but seemed to have a good plan set around for it.

 

Rating: C

 

8) Promo - Maddix Hype Package

 

Maddix covers the backstory for this one just to get all the hype fresh in our minds. And shows his complete hate for Johnny Dangerous.

Touching on the whole thing of is Johnny really doing things in WC's name and etc.

Vowing to send Johnny to the scrap head and such.

And then some TV recaps of the events Maddix has been talking about that's lead upto here.

 

9) ICTV Title Match - Maddix vs Dangerous

 

Cowboy Riley.....dear god save us all please. It just shouldn't be thought of.

More of the history thing coming up, which always helps give a better feeling for a lot of matches.

And with such a heated build, things rightly start off with a brawl because straight up wrestling just wouldnt be right.

Having Maddix just "pop back up" from the opening shots might be a big much. Sounds more like no selling that he just rolling straight back up because it doesnt hurt enough yet to keep him down.

Angle-itis with the missed clothesline transistions, but with these guys styles, what you gonna do eh?

Switching into wrestling so soon is...eh, it'd have worked better with more prolonged firey stuff to start with due to the hyped heated nature of this match.

Dangerous just letting out of the Ankle Lock is badly cover and just doesn't fit.

Still, at least he then goes back to the knee when Maddix gets back into the ring.

Chokes on the ropes are good standard heel stuff and give Maddix time to recover from some of the knee work done.

Johhny keeps working over the knee, breaking on a few normally heels spots to do so, but it all works here.

It all leads up to Johnny going for a Figure Four which Maddix would definatly now to counter so it's a good spot there.

A lot of the history points are being brought up here just to spell things out which is a nice touch at times, but could turn to be too heavy handed.

And then Johnny finally goes to the well one to many times, but the this one is starting off, Johnny is actually the heel in terms lf usual match layout and tactics.

Maddix shifts his style to low end and effective, even if it makes him look like he has very little ways of beating Johnny now.

Johnny just bursting out of the corners again makes no sense without some build up to a fight back. Just felt like a spot in there to lead upto the DDT.

Johnny getting floored on the outside finally has some sort of normal heel/face balance going on. Nothing wrong with moving away from that, but it is a hard thing to do.

The leg work is being treated as slowly wearing off, but it's not forgotten. Could use a little more desc on it during lifting moves, to show Maddix struggling.

Nice, if ripped off, false finish with the Superkick/Ankle Lock/Roll Up.

Three Elbow Drop scoring jsut about works. Maddix is still looking fast enough to hit both, and hey, Johhny has to sell the first two.

And it just makes the kick out huge...and it only passes because it's a PPV title match.

Maddix straight for another big move makes sense, trying to win while the opp is weakend.

End starts to break down a bit, with the leaping of the kick into the Dragon Clutch, even with teh bad need, but it's nothing major breaking.

The call of both guys being phsyically spent cames some out of the final race to the finish as things finally pick up into high gear.

Again the art of a long string of false finishes which just about hang onto the story of the match and such.

I dont know what the hell is up with Johnny going for the Sharpshooter rather than the Baracuda which would work much better.

And Landon breaks the laws off physics with the Dangerousn Driver countered into a Victory Roll.

Again the problem of Johnny bursting into life and then flopping dead, rather than something slower and more measured.

Johnny kicks out of a finisher and is some how able to move on his own still, which really doesnt work.

And Maddix and Card just laughin in Johnny's face just caps it all off.

Good match, but it suffers from Landon stretching it out way to much and having to keep is ideas and sell together and justifying the action still going on. It can be done, yes, but it's not always that easy. Dangerous' character just about fits that mold against cruiser but Maddix isn't played as the type to take some much and keep ticking.

 

Rating: B-

 

10) Triple Threat Submission - My Match

 

I do some crap here and there and I come out with this. Yay, go me for the default win and crap like that.

 

11) Tag Team Title Match - 42nd Street vs Team Flip Flop

 

LMAO @ Team Flip Flop's entrance, that one's just golden people.

And the riding surfboards down the ring on blue smoke is just as golden. It's brilliant.

Ok, this is comedy but TMM hitting on Andrea by pulling a Flair is really funny and adds a nice light touch to things on this PPV.

Simple little start off to show set up the first balance between the two teams.

It's an ever walked fine line between being comedy and just being silly all the time, but as ever this match works out well, which makes both the wrestling and comedy moments all the better.

Gotta love the Mark Knixx gag as well while the sheer speed vs power and skill balance carries on.

42nd Street have no problem working against Team Flip Flop and it still makes for a good tag match.

More speed playing out against skill before TMM gets disturbing and starts spanking Andrea.

And the basic tag team balance cries on, with Team Flop Flip working just like in other matches to get their advantage back with the speed surprise.

More twisted jokes as the action hots up and Team Flip Flop have to keep up with the antics of the more experienced tag team.

Nice false finisher with Andrea making a blind tag as TMM hits his finisher and the match keeps going.

And again with an nice finisher spot, the tag team finisher being countered but being turned into a doublet team move anyway.

Heat section looks like it's going to end, but Birdman not holding the tag rope is a nice little spot to keep it going.

Another big spot with the Bird Buster for more heat as Team Flip Flop is just trying to race their way to a victory before 42nd Street run them down.

42nd Street finally score the double team..and Birdman tries to break it up, but this time Todd is waiting for him.

Good tag match with comedy mostly in the writing and not the in ring action. Pretty smooth and well writen thoughout and playing off earlier matches.

 

Rating: B

 

12) Promo - Zenon, Grand Slam and Suicide King

 

Grand Slam just turns up out of nowhere. Sell for it bitches.

Stuffs been happening with GS, good for him. And he calls out Zenon and the bitch session starts up.

And the Suicide King is showing up, you REALLY better mark for that one.

And in the age old twist of Contract Loop Holes, Stevens in back on the roster.

Ahhh, nothing like a spot on the PPV where the top brass fight it out with pulling in us lowely wrestlers.

 

13) Far To Bloody Long World Title Triple Threat Match - Toxxic vs Flesher vs Janus

 

Between this match and Maddix's we have an average TV show you know.

Mini tale of the tape style number with the intro graphics because this show's been all about hype.

Boo and f'n' hiss at Toxxic wearing a LP tshirt with an Autobot logo on. Damn fuckers crapping on the memory more than Armarda.

The escourt jokes was a good bit of comedy though. Lifting off some of the mood before the match gets too heavy.

Lovely opening gamebet by Flesher just makes him look that damn good, which he is.

It's an interestling match plan forming from the get go. Point though that Flesher would just about be able to German Janus...but only just.

The character tight roped being walked in very fine. Flesher has the chance to win fasts, but he knows Toxxic is just sitting out, and it's a question of if he would go after him or not.

But the problem of starting off so high impact so soon, as close fall so soon means it's all the harder to stretch the match out into a long one.

But then things settle down and it looks much more pased. Toxxic's certainly got to the point where there's not much to say about his writing. He's definatly not Flesher but it's still good.

And now Janus called Toxxic in, so the worry about Toxxic just sitting out there without anyone noticing for ages in gone.

I'm almost started to feel like Janus is getting bitch out here as Toxxic comes in and picks straight up from Flesher in working Janus over.

One thing that is coming up is the lack of mention of what the third man is doing. Because now there's no rush to break up the fall yes, but it leaves you thinking he's still down and selling, even from a simple move.

Then it turns into everyone all to smoothly getting up just as the other person goes down.

But at least Toxxic and Flesher are playing off their singles match against each other.

Toxxic and Flesher are working well picking their spots against Janus, and some slight double teaming to score the first fall. Which is all well and good, but sheer rated between them isnt showing up at all really, ontop of the fact that it's always Janus being worked over and it never feels like it's the other way around for the moment.

The first tap out irks me as Janus just doesnt reach back and rip Flesher off as he very well could. The same with the over leg holds as he would have the reach just to Knuckle Bomb Flesher while he went for the holds. These is the pain yes, but he doesnt really try to.

And you'd think Toxxic should shot to roll up Janus and get the thee count before Flesher realised. As know the match would just be, race to pin Janus first.

And now we have the race to finish Janus off first along with Toxxic and Flesher hatred playing off, but it leaves Janus as a Jericho style third wheel.

Few shoot gags never hurt giving a counter point to the action going on in the match.

Janus comes out of nowhere and flattens the two men as their little fued goes on and it feels a bit to sudden, lacking that talk of Janus struggling back into action.

Finally Janus gets an offensive run into the match and actually looks like HE's the Champ, as he batters Flesher around and spikes him for a pin.

And now things get interesting with a two horse race to lose the fastest. But having more falls sooner in the match and longer stretches to later falls might have help the tension and build, as well as allowing for Janus not to look like a chump.

Janus launching Toxxic through the SAT is a nice one, but was done for story and I have to feel he as was in possistion for a Screwdriver he might of tired that, even with a bad leg.

But Toxxic now getting counted out as the action goes on was set up with the stuff from the start of the match so that one works out nicely and fits to the matches logic plan which is a nice plus.

But Flesher just being down only adds to the whole, people are just down and out selling inbetween spots rather than anthing more complex.

Still, Flesher keeps up his role of outsmart Janus deep into the match.

And with the count out which worked very well, the final race is on. But another point is missed, when Janus scores one KB, why not just combo them for a submission on Flesher?

But Flesher trying to drag Janus to the ropes and play both races at the same time is an interesting spot and with Toxxic being counted out again, the race has been made very interesting.

But then Flesher just takes Toxxic back in and even with the advantage of Janus being down, DOESNT take advantage of Toxxic, who then makes the shocking comeback of doom.

A big race to the finisher with finisher being countered off again and again, looking to be the one that gets lucky. Which leaves a few gaps.

The whole race the finish ends up being pretty interesting and Toxxic breaks out some nice ideas for winning and why the holds have to be broken up (eg the Chokehold and DQ, etc)

Ends up making the best of a horrible stituion and booking through exictuion suffers from lack of knowledge and ideas (less so than before as Toxxic's getting better but some bases still arent covered)

 

Rating: B+ grudgingly due to not being a clusterfuck at this huge lenght.

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And Landon breaks the laws off physics with the Dangerousn Driver countered into a Victory Roll.

Yeah...that should have been a normal roll through pin, but for some reason I called it a victory roll anyway. Bleh.

 

And yes, selling ain't my strong point. Still...kudos for reading it and typing all that out man. You're a real service to the fed man. [/end suck-up]

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Mark the fuck out!!

 

Grand Slam is back!! Strangler is back!! Dear Lord...GODrea is back! What the hell is going on??

 

Contemplates.....

 

 

 

Considers....

 

 

 

Nah.

 

Read the main event...

 

HOLY SHIT! I have no idea what's going on around here, but when in the hell did Toxxic get that good?!? My hat's off to you...very well done...very well done indeed.

 

Didn't read the rest cause I have no time...but it seems that the roster is rather full these days. The show looked very full as well. I hope this keeps up into the fall.

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Ok, Dace reviewed everyone else’s match so the least I can do is review his.

 

A good bit of scene-setting from the commentators although the dialogue seems a little stilted in parts. What I DON’T like is the excessive use of the lyrics to the entrance music, as I’m fairly sure that the wrestlers would already be out and in the ring by the time it’s done, but this is more an issue of presentation than actual wrestling so I’ll shut my hole.

 

Good opening spot of Lezaire paying for his cockiness by having the two faces - well, one face and one crowd-pleasing psycho - annihilate him before turning on each other. The counter wrestling is good as well as you’d expect from Dace. I can’t decide whether I like Dace blocking two of Drazon’s finishers in quick succession or not - on one hand it makes it obvious that Drazon needs to soften people up before using them, on the other it makes Dace look superior right from the start. Then again Dace does win, so maybe that’s the point. I’m also not sure why Drazon’s Shoteis are so much more effective on Dace than Flesher’s, when Dace was basically no-selling them during their five-mtchn series, but maybe Drazon’s martial arts background counts there.

 

Love the “Ace Sucks Steve!” chant. Our crowd are never short of some good abuse for the heels.

 

Can you bridge up from a prone position through a double chickenwing? I don’t know, so I guess I won’t doubt the Move Guru. However, where this match is really hurt for me is in the language and grammar - simple things like Ace ‘spots himself short’ instead of ‘stops himself’, and Dace’s peculiar choices on where to stop and start sentences. His wrestling knowledge comes to the rescue once more though, and little things like air for Ace being likened to sex for a teenager - important, but not really available - make me laugh.

 

I’m surprised that even a man as tough as Drazon won’t tap out to a cross-legged STF after being kicked in the nuts TWICE, but he is Hardcore after all, and this of course allows Dace to recover from the Ace Crusher and run into break it up - ‘canoeing’ into Ace’s legs, whatever that is. And WHY does Drazon head over the top onto Steve and Ace? If Dace AND Ace had been out there I can see it happening, but the Drazon I know would have low-blowed Dace from behind and locked on his hiza-jujigatame to make him tap before Ace could get back into the ring, but hey. And why would the cowardly Lezaire attack Dace when Dace was weakening Drazon? The back work would help the Vanity or Perfection as well as the Torture Crab, there was no danger of a tap-out since they weren’t in the ring and Ace surely isn’t kindly disposed towards the man who just took him out with a suicide dive.

 

Nevertheless the sequence where Dace puts a Stretch Plum on Ace to counter Ace’s Inverted Surfboard Dragon Sleeper is good, as is Drazon’s modified Shining Black. But let me get this straight - Drazon takes a THIRD nutshot and still has enough left to shrug it off and kick Ace around the ring? I’m surprised, to say the least. Ooh, and interference from Steve to distract the referee, how very WWE ;) I’m not sure about Drazon leaving his man, I get a similar vibe from his as I do from Dace - basically, if the referee’s distracted he’ll just hold on and break Ace’s leg. But then again I haven’t been around as long, I could well be wrong.

 

Dace goes from half-clear head to full speed to hit a rolling elbow... EXCELLENT counter-wrestling sequence into the Torture Crab on Drazon, but why does Lezaire go for Dace after breaking the hold? He kicks him in the back of the head (not that it matters much, as Dace no-sells it and starts firing off back elbows) when I’d have thought that since Drazon just tapped out it would make more sense to put the Perfection or Vanity on Drazon and watch him tap in under a second before Dace could interfere. But finally Dace make Drazon tap for the second time and become the new #1 contender.

 

Overall, Dace has a major advantage in the fact that he actually showed, unlike the competition. I can’t fault the wrestling (except maybe that bridged-out Chickenwing, but I’m sure he’s right) but, dare I say it, I’m a little unsure about some of the psychology. I know, I know, pot and kettle, but I’ve got to say what I think. I’m sure everyone will argue with me but I can’t help feeling that some of the actions taken don’t really fit with the characters or common sense. It’s the language that really bugs me as it prevents a match from flowing when I have to read a sentence twice or more, not to figure out what’s going on but to figure out what words Dace intended to use. Nevertheless, I know from recent experience how hard it is to write a non-clusterfucky triple threat match, especially one with a confining stip like this one, and I salute Dace for pulling it off.

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Guest Beingz0wningj00

It was stated in the very early times of the SWF, that Drazon wears a titanium jock to the ring.

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