Your stankiest fart ever

[Guest Regina Phelange]

Ahh... Thanksgiving farts. Turnip, beets and turkey make for a great room clearer!

[Guest The Ohtani of Time]

Is "Stankiest" even a word?

[kkktookmybabyaway 0]

Not sure about "ever" but Pizza Hut pan pizzas seem to bring the odor out in me...

[B. Brian Brunzell 0]

Steak and shrimp always seem to get the best of me. Or worst, take your pick.

 

The greatest fart I have ever witnessed came when I was a sophmore in high school. My buddy Chris let one go and it cleared the room, including the NUN. She opened the windows to air it out, but the scent was too overpowering, so the entire class left the room. Oaf became a legend at Joliet Catholic after that one.

[Red Hot Thumbtack In The Eye 0]

'And that is concentrated evil coming out of your behind.."

[Nevermortal 0]

A few weeks back, one of my friends farted in 7-11, and it apparently smelled like cancer.

[Guest Danny Dubya v 2.0]

A few years ago I let one rip in the living room and my mom walked by and thought our dog took a dump somewhere, and did a thorough search of the entire room and had one of those scent-masking spraycans in her hand, before realizing what had happened and then she harped on me for not saying anything and laughing at her.

[1234-5678 0]

Budweiser and Geno's Cheesesteaks.

[razazteca 0]

Shasta strawberry & kiwi soda.

[snuffbox 0]

What a precious thread

[Corey_Lazarus 0]

Large Italian sub, small order of onion rings, and a bowl of chicken alfredo.

 

Constant farting. Constant SBD's.

[B. Brian Brunzell 0]

Shasta strawberry & kiwi soda.

Hmmm, that's an odd combo. Nothing like a fruity concoxtion of methane gas.

[Your Paragon of Virtue 0]

Steak and shrimp always seem to get the best of me. Or worst, take your pick.

 

The greatest fart I have ever witnessed came when I was a sophmore in high school. My buddy Chris let one go and it cleared the room, including the NUN. She opened the windows to air it out, but the scent was too overpowering, so the entire class left the room. Oaf became a legend at Joliet Catholic after that one.

Hey, is that the same Joliet Catholic that Jimmy Chamberlain went to?

 

I think anyway, I vaguely remember this for some reason. Holla back with the answer.

 

As for the actual thread topic, I come up with surprises everytime.

[The Mandarin 0]

A few weeks back, one of my friends farted in 7-11, and it apparently smelled like cancer.

That's funny, one time my uncle ripped one at the bank that apparently smelled like a pregnant lady falling off a bridge.

[The Czech Republic 0]

I had a fart that smelled like the Spanish Inquisition.

[MrRant 0]

I bet no one expected that.

[MrRant 0]

Buffalo chili

[The Czech Republic 0]

I ate a whole bag of Taco Doritos last night, and nothing else that day. The chips were consumed between 1 and 4. I slept from 5 to 8. What came next was something that made me question my belief in God.

[MrRant 0]

The Buffalo Chili made me believe in Satan. The only explanation for that smell is that Satan used my asshole to transfer his being to the land of the living.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

There's a poster here who goes by the handle two_tuff_toddy. He doesn't post a whole lot, to my knowledge, but I'm accquainted with the guy in real life, and his ass is unnatural. He once farted in the back of a moving pickup truck and stunk out the cab.

[kkktookmybabyaway 0]

I remember toddy. That's all...

[Alro 0]

Pizza does it. Beer does it the morning after. The two strangest for me are popcorn and mint chocolate chip ice cream. No other ice cream does it. And it smells terrible, which is the price I have to pay for consuming my favorite flavor.

[The Czech Republic 0]

I remember toddy. That's all...

two_tuff_toddy was the arch-enemy of The Upright Man.

[The Mandarin 0]

He once farted in the back of a moving pickup truck and stunk out the cab.

What was the purpose of noting that it was moving? Would it not have smelled as bad had it been parked?

[Scroby 0]

Whenever I eat bacon. My friends try to make sure I never eat any around them.

[Use Your Illusion 0]

That's not because you stink. It's because they hate you.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

He once farted in the back of a moving pickup truck and stunk out the cab.

What was the purpose of noting that it was moving? Would it not have smelled as bad had it been parked?

I don't think you understand..He was downwind of the cab of the truck. He was sitting in the open BED of a pickup, going quickly down the road, farted, into the open atmosphere, and stunk out the cab.

 

Contemplate the physics of a fart that fought against the wind like a salmon fights the stream.

[The Mandarin 0]

Oh sweet lord.

 

That's awful.

[CanadianChris 0]

Pickled eggs and beer.

 

My dad never tires of telling the story of how he cleared an entire bowling alley the day after eating pickled eggs and beer.

[nl5xsk1 0]

I had a plain ol' chicken sandwich, with mushrooms, at a bar here in suburbia, before going to a Bruins game in the city. I was Ok during the game, but towards the end started to feel the rumble in the jungle.

 

We went to the Harp, right across the street, and due to how packed it was I felt no pressure to hold in the stankers, and just let 'em rip. They got progressively worse, until people were literally covering their nose & mouth with their shirts. One girl actually said it smelled like rotting grass. When we left there we went to the Coyote Ugly, where I continued to let them go. Finally one of the sluts that worked there got on the microphone and shrieked "whoever's blowing ass, put a cork in it. You're ruining my bar!" Needless to say, me and my friends lost our shit, and broke out laughing. The guy working the door actually asked us to leave.

 

So, my gas was bad enough to get me 86ed from a white-trash bar.