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MrRant

What was the very last thing you purchased?

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Factory Reconditioned Cuisinart DGB-500BKFR Grind & Brew 12 Cup Automatic Coffeemaker, Black

 

Cuisinart GTF-B Gold Tone Coffee Filter

 

Shadow of the Hegemon (Ender, Book 6)

 

Back to Basics TEM500 Egg-and-Muffin 2-Slice Toaster and Egg Poacher

 

Croscill Fabric Shower Curtain Liner, White

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Aqua Teen Hunger Force season 5, a little gel typing rest pad, a carabiner, and a pedalboard. I gotta go do some shopping today for, like, groceries and shit.

 

Speaking of which, my neighbors haven't taken their trash cans out to the street for months. We have 5 and they are all full.

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- Iced cap from work. Goodness.

 

- Guitar Hero: On Tour for DS. Youth Gone Wild~!

 

- Definitive Ric Flair Collection.

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A Reese's Fast Break, a 100-Grand bar, a Vanilla Bean Java Monster, and one of those Arizona Black & White Teas.

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Guest Smues

Some snacks from a gas station, including 2 bottles of Gatorade, because they were sitting on the counter and the lady charged me for them. Despite having been standing at the counter the whole time and she should have noticed that I didn't bring them up to the counter with me. Oh well, Gatorade is good.

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-Richard Laymon's book "The Woods Are Dark"

-New garbage cans (old ones are filled with holes, and no matter how much I try, they refuse to be clean)

-A few DVD's

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The very last thing I purchased was 16 electrical outlet covers, 8 lightswitch covers and a set of 5 silver drawer handles.

 

Being a homeowner makes you boring. I used to want to claw my eyes out every time I had to go to the Home Depot for something or other... now I find myself wandering the aisles going "oooh." It's a bit unsettling.

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Bud Light is even worse, Budweiser gives me a bad aftertaste, I hate the "full" beers like Guinness and Sam Adams and the like, never cared for LaBatt, the aftertaste of IPA's makes me want to puke, and they don't sell Yeungling up here. I didn't want to get drop-down hammered, so I chose beer over my preferred Jagermeister, though my girl did get a nice fifth of the Doctor menthol mint that we all (me, her, my band) demolished in the span of a couple hours, and I had one of her Sparks.

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Dude.

 

Coors?

 

Conversation with a college kid Walmart co-worker last January.

 

Rob: What kinda beer you drinkin nowadays, Collins?

CG: I don't normally buy it, but my dad and bro both drink Coors Light. They were over earlier in the week, so I have a dozen or so left.

Rob: What? Coors Light!? The worst beer ever!

CG: What? It's pretty well water!

Rob: It's disgusting!

CG: What do you know? You're in college! I was getting kicked out of bars before you hit puberty!

Rob: Shut up.

CG: Do you have any idea how much malt liquor I drank in college? And you're telling me an unbelievably easy drinking beer is disgusting?

 

At this point, a customer who'd been progressively enjoying our argument came and shook my hand. That is all.

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Guardian's Crusade. The very first PS1 game I ever played. Much better than the second PS1 game I ever played...WCW Nitro.

At least it wasn't WCW Thunder.

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2 boxes of match books, a thing of latex gloves, some cooking oil, a length of packing twine, and a cheap plastic costume derby hat.

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Porno magazine, large box of condoms, bottle of Old Harper, a couple panty shields, some illegal fireworks and two disposable enemas.

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Porno magazine, large box of condoms, bottle of Old Harper, a couple panty shields, some illegal fireworks and two disposable enemas.

 

In the long run only the condoms can be good for our environment.

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