And today, we remember.

[Guest Vitamin X]

[UZI Suicide 0]

I FORGOT.

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

 

How many times did I hear this song today? Probably about 10 times easily on the same station over the course of the whole day. I wish I had control of the radio sometimes.

 

 

[At Home 0]

That song is so laden with irony

[Guest Vitamin X]

 

[Cheech Tremendous 0]

I don't know why, but I felt like posting this instead.

 

 

[At Home 0]

[Gary Floyd 0]

[bob_barron 0]

But ah, you know, the good thing is, that it takes my mind off the horrific events that happened the last September the fifteenth when everything went to…

 

Because, this Robert Blake thing, I don't give a fuck one way or the other. I just like watching it. Where as the September fifteenth thing [these are not typos], woah, that- that’s scary. That was when it came- that is when it actually- that’s the first time I watched something and got scared, on the news. You know? Because, ah, it happened right here. You know what I mean? and ah- ah. I- I think we all remember where we were when we first heard about it. We where… watching the TV. … That's not much of a story but that's what we'll be telling our grandkids.

 

You’re sayin’, “I remember, yes, I was watching the TV and then I was switching the channels and it was on all the channels!”

 

But it was scary. You didn’t know what to do. You remember that? You’re just, ah, for four five days you’re just, “What the fuck am I supposed to do? Is it all right to go down to K-Mart? I don’t know.” You didn't know what to do... you go- you're just all in shock and everything.

 

And you go, “What do I? I’m all freaked out.” And then you figure it out. You go, “Hey! I figured it out! I know what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna buy a flag!” You figure it out. You know? “Fuck it. I- Imma get me two, three flags. Put one in my house. Let them try that horseshit again. Let them try that shit now! I got me a flag!”

 

Also it shows which side of the issue you stand on. Yeah. So people know now, where I stand on this whole fucking thing. I am for the building full of people... and I'm against the plane with the insane people on it. This flag will show people that.

 

Well, I tell you man, if any fucking Arab mother fucker ever came at me with a bunch of goddamn dynamite on him, first thing I'd do is throw away the fucking flag. I'd go, “I don't know where the fuck that come from. That's not my flag. I usually tote around a Arab flag, to tell you the truth!”

 

Anything to live, you know? Not dying, that's what I'm going for. I wanna not die. [laughs]

 

That was the scariest part of nine-eleven, ah- ah, because it was you. You're, "Goddamn. I- I- I- What the hell? I could die. ‘Cause, ah. Where did it happen? Here? I live here." You know? Because, in the other, it’s- usually it's another place, you know, and you don't give a fuck. But, you know, like for years I’ve been watching the TV and I'll turn it on and it'll be like, "Today in Rwanda, three hundred thousand people where--" CLICK. ... I'm gonna watch Matlock or something.

 

I miss Matlock man, that guy was... He should defend Robert Blake. Why the hell can't he get back on the TV? I have to watch crazy young people.

 

But that nine-fifteen, man, that was some scary shit. Because, also, I think it scared us because it- it introduced new ways that we could die. You know, and you don’t want to hear that. There's enough ways to die. When, ah, when they come up with new ones, that's a scary fucking thing. You know?

 

You go, “How's that work again? Now, I could be in my office, ah, typing on my typewriter, and an airplane can hit me? I never heard that one.”

 

They go “Yeah, they just came up with that last month. That's a new one, they figured it out.”

 

“Goddamn, I didn't know that one. I got a typewriter there.”

 

And then right after that, all kinds of new ways, they tell you every goddamn day a new way to die. They say like, “Hey, ah, anthrax, you heard about that?”

 

I said, “I don’t know, I thought it was about cows or something.”

 

“No, no anthrax, that- you can die, it's a new way for you to die!”

 

You go, “How's that work?”

 

They go, “Well have you ever, ah, opened an… envelope?”

 

“Yeah, I've been known to open an envelope.”

 

“Well, you're in a high risk group then! You could die from that! They just came out- that's the new thing.”

 

Crazy shit. Smallpox, I said, fuck you can't die- I know you can't die from Smallpox. They eradicated that fifty years ago. No, guy kept a bottle. He kept a bottle and then he- and then he lost it. Goddamn, why would you keep a bottle of fucking smallpox?

 

You go, “All right, we got it eradicated, only this one bottle left. Let’s flush it down the toilet, and then there'll be one less fucking way for us to die… Hey, or I can keep it! Put it on the end table and impress girls with it. Scare people, hey look at that!” And then one day it's like, "Where the fuck's that bottle of smallpox? I misplaced it, goddamn I know I had it. And then I had that party for all them Arabs… and now I can't find it!" [laughs]

 

I went to a fucking airport and they wanted to search me. I said, "I'm not a fucking Arab! What the fuck are you talking about?"

 

So I showed the guy my- my- my pa- my passport. A non-Arab passport. I go, “That’s me. I’m not the Arab. I'm the guy the Arab could kill.” He wanted to search me.

 

--Norm

[CanadianGuitarist 0]

I don't know why, but I felt like posting this instead.

 

 

 

I can't be the only one who thought that about Batman's flowers.

 

Also, John Ritter and Johnny Cash died on 9-11.

[Guest Vitamin X]

Since 9/11 is still going on here for another hour and a half, we must never forget..

 

I never... got to use this coupon... *sob*

[bob_barron 0]

Cash died on 9/12.

Ritter died on 9/11.

[... 0]

Mr. Dressup died 9/18/01.

[Jobber of the Week 0]

This thread was just brought to my attention, so scuze me while I step in here and own the room:

 

[Cheech Tremendous 0]

By the way, what is wrong with us?

[Nighthawk 0]

Yeah man... I mean, what is this even accomplishing? Callousness for the sake of callousness?

[Youth N Asia 0]

I kinda forgot until I saw the news midway and they couldn't wait to remind me

[Guest Vitamin X]

To be fair, I was only using this thread to highlight really bad 9-11 art/kitsch, not to be callous or anything. Everyone just made it that way. Way to go, TSM!

 

o/

[Guest Tzar Lysergic]

I want Yakety Sax played at my funeral.

[Dobbs 3K 0]

I remember a thread where people posted comments from New Yorkers like "I was hoping things would break down into anarchy and street fighting so I could go kick some Muslim ass." Anyone remember that?

[Guest Vitamin X]

Oh, and one more just for the hell of it:

 

Never forget... to eat cake.

[Sideburnious 0]

I bet the towers were the first things to be eaten.

[Nighthawk 0]

I bet those tickets make the chocolate taste terrible.

[Obi Chris Kenobi 0]

hahaha shit, finally Americans who are able to 'joke' about the never ending media plaguing about 9/11.

[Sideburnious 0]

JOKE ABOUT 9/11!!!

 

I froze when I read what Chriswok wrote...

[PUT THAT DICK IN MY MOUTH! 0]

Yeah man... I mean, what is this even accomplishing? Callousness for the sake of callousness?

 

Irony as defense mechanism duh. Hard to contemplate all the awful shit that happens in the world. Peeps can't deal so they mak jokes about it. Hahaha look how funny 9/11 is! (inside I am dying).

[Guest Smues]

Doesn't it have to be 20 years before it's funny, like teh AIDS?

[bob_barron 0]

hahaha shit, finally Americans who are able to 'joke' about the never ending media plaguing about 9/11.

 

I don't really think the media does that anymore in America. Plus, it's the most infamous day of the last 50 years, of course it deserves constant chatter.

 

That said, I did a bunch of bits about 9/11 when I did stand-up. Good times.

[Cheech Tremendous 0]

Doesn't it have to be 20 years before it's funny, like teh AIDS?

 

Seven years, I think. So we just made it. Or was it seven years before you can steal a wrestling angle?

[Nighthawk 0]

I thought that was the statute of limitations. So 13 year old fucking is now going in my stand up act. Just try and prosecute me!