TheBostonStrangler

I have bought a few mp3's when the ones floating around aren't of a high quality. Other than that, free for me.

I'd prefer Steve Avery, former MLB pitcher

I'm Boston Strangler. I used to write here. Now I don't. There is nothing wrong with CC. They are perfect. Justice is sexy as hell. Keep writing matches. Keep buying merchandise. Do what we say. Say what we do. Obey.

I think that Zybysko actually has an excellent character, but he's just being used in the wrong role. I like Zybysko as an overmatched middle manager type who gets stuck dealing with the crap day in and day out. What they need to do is have an authority figure directly above Larry on the food chain, someone who actually comes off as something other than a whiny punk. Have Zybysko on every show dealing with day-to-day issues, and have the suit come in when it's important.

Man, I hope Z got me a better Kingmas present than last year. What the hell am I supposed to do with a TNT hummel anyways?

I dig

I watch the replay every week, so it's definitely a good idea.

How about updating the title history?

If this fed is still going in 2010, Ghost Machine better still be a part of it. And I say we give Angel a title shot against ELM.

I went jetskiing this June in Hawaii, wiped out, hurt my knee in the process, and watched the jetski float away. I then spent the next 15 hours floating in the ocean. During that time I sang to myself a lot, freaked out when I thought I saw a fin (I'm still convinced it was a fin - waves don't make 90 degree turns), shivered, and got hauled in by a Coast Guard helicopter the next morning. It got me on the national news, actually. I was on CNN's morning show to do an interview. I also turned down Good Morning America, The Early Show, Inside Edition, Montel, and People Magazine (since telling a story about me being a moron wasn't quite what I was looking to get famous for). http://forums.thesmartmarks.com/index.php?showtopic=71183 - thread talking about it (CNN link is dead, I think) http://the.honoluluadvertiser.com/article/...1/ln/ln16p.html - article talking about it

SWF Favorite Writer(s)? - I loved to read King's stuff. The Suicide King is the only character I ever felt legitimate disdain for. Straight off the bat with the King of Hearts betraying the Carnival (I did NOT see that coming at all), I just couldn't stand the man. King was definitely the man. Honorable mention to Wildchild, whose stuff always played out in my head perfectly. Favorite Match(es)? - The Edwin/Stevens retirement match is #1. Goddamn, that one broke my heart. I also loved the eight-man tag match that I was (a very small) part of - Wildchild, Flesher, Strangler, and Dangerous vs. Craven, Taylor, Ejiro, and Judge, if I recall correctly. That match was the perfect capper to all the Ejiro/WC drama. They could not have done it any better. Favorite Promo(s)? - Almost everything that was written during the Kibagami/Edwin feud was excellent work that took a long time to play out. I always enjoyed when another one of those came up. And anyone who has read and didn't laugh at Operation P.O.O.F.N.A.R. can die. Favorite Character(s)? - I'd go with King, Stevens, and Ejiro. King was the ultimate evil heel, Stevens was the ultimate clean-cut face, and Ejiro's dick heel character cannot ever be topped. Favorite Spot(s)? - I am completely drawing a blank on this....I'll say whatever move Frost would hit on Z every time Z lost to him Favorite Move Names? - I always had a soft spot for the Soargasm by Xstasy. Favorite Stipulation(s)? - Street Fights, Mall Brawl, and Lost at Sea (whoo) Least Favorite Stipulation(s)? - Death on Ice. Goddamn that match. Favorite Match(es) and Promo(s) (Written by you)? - Favorite match was a losing effort against Tom Flesher in an I Quit match where he won the World Title from me. I still believe my match was better, which is the only defeat that still sticks with me. Dream Matches? - Until a few months ago, it was ELM vs. Wildchild. I would have loved to see Fallout vs. Danny Williams as well. Dream Angles? - I would have loved to see Grand Slam and Flesher run an angle while they were both active and in their prime. Funny Moment(s)? - P.O.O.F.N.A.R., Chrissy Stardust and the Carnies from Mars, and Outcast's rape storyline Fondest Memories? - Being world champ was fun, but there were three things that really stick with me: Beating Nekura and Thoth in a tag match that got me into the upper midcard, Pt. 1 of my feud with Erek Taylor taking 2nd in Feud of the Year voting, and coming out of retirement to write and win a Mall Brawl match. Any Regrets? - I never feuded with Chris Wilson or Thugg, both of whom I would have loved to run an angle with. I also regret not evolving Strangler as a wrestler to some degree, although he definitely evolved as a character. I've became most friendly with...? - There aren't many people I'm still in regular contact with. I talk to Z a decent amount, I'm in touch with Chris Wilson, GOdrea and I talk a bit....after that, it's sporadic at best. Back in the day, I was pretty friendly with Thugg, but I haven't heard from him in forever. Wrestling Favorite Federation? - TNA Favorite Worker? - Probably Rey Mysterio. Rest of the best are Shelton Benjamin, Samoa Joe, AJ Styles, Chris Benoit, and Monty Brown (I'm a whore for the Pounce) Least Favorite Worker? - Randy Orton Favorite Match(es)? - Tough to choose. I've seen a lot more WWE than TNA/WCW, so my major interests lie there. I'd pick from a few matches depending on my mood: Austin/HHH vs. Benoit/Jericho (the torn quad match with the tag title change), Angle/Benoit at the 2003 Royal Rumble (seen live at my first live event), Benoit/HHH/HBK at WM XX (also seen live at my second and last live event), Styles/Lynn/Psicosis/Low-Ki from the second TNA show, and Styles/Joe from a couple months ago Favorite Stipulation? - I love ladder matches. Total whore. Dream Matches? - I'd love to see Joe vs. Benoit If I worked for a company it'd be... - Probably the WWE, sadly My style of wrestling would be... - Pedestrian and plodding. I'd be champ in a month. Face or heel? - Face. I love the cheers. Dream Matches (that includes you)? - I'd love to team with Mysterio against the late Eddie Guerrero and Kurt Angle Personal Name? - Pat Hannon Age? - 20 Single?- Hells yes Biggest Turn On? - Blondes Biggest Turn Off? - Ego Religious? - Not in the slightest Favorite book(s)? - "In The Lake Of The Woods" by Tim O'Brien Favorite movie(s)? - American Beauty, A History of Violence, Snatch, Rushmore, South Park, Caddyshack Favorite actor/actress? - Kevin Spacey Favorite bands? - Green Day, U2, Dropkick Murphys Favorite song(s)? - U2, "Where The Streets Have No Name" Most Recent Accomplishment? - Kicking some serious ass on my last paper Most Recent Failure? - Not buying beer this weekend My biggest flaw... - Stubbornness I like my... - iPod Future Goal(s)? - Not being poor Do you write outside the SWF (if so, what do you write)? - I write, mainly creative nonfiction. Hit a bit of a drought there, though. Right now, just working on my school paper and such. Heroes? - No one in particular. I would love to meet... - Ralph Nader Hardest moment of my life... - Getting lost in the Pacific Ocean overnight with nothing but a life jacket Greatest moment of my life... - Getting the fuck out of the ocean Would you want to be famous? - I'd like to be recognized, not famous Favorite swear word? - Anyone who says something other than fuck is a fucking pussy. Favorite food? - Cheeseburger What would you want God to say if you want to Heaven? - "Y'know, I was always a Sox fan too...." What would you want the Devil to say if you were in Hell? - "You'll be rooming with Mr. Jeter"

Then consider yourself lucky that you missed Outcast.

Belcourt's always been a fucking whiner.

Blank is absolutely the man. That is all.

The Main Event - SWF World Heavyweight Championship Match El Luchadore Magnifico © vs. JJ Johnson ->ELM just keeps winning. Until he loses the belt, you basically have to pick him. -=-=-THE CLUSTERFUCK-=-=- 1. "Hollywood" Spike Jenkins 2. Laberinto 3. "The Rage" Jason von Dierch 4. Stryke 5. Manson 6. Christian Fury 7. Ghost Machine V. 2.0 8. The 70's Dude 9. Wes Davenport 10. Todd Cortez 11. Matt Myers 12. Candace "The Joshi Dragon" Okimura 13. Kevin Coyote 14. The Crimson Skull 15. Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix 16. Bruce Blank 17. "The Icon" Max King 18. Zyon 19. TORU 20. Tim Dillon I have no frame of reference on this whatsoever - let's say Davenport. The five people I'd put money on in no particular order: Davenport, TORU, Maddix, Stryke (because I know he'll write it), and Zyon. SWF International Championship Match Jay Hawke © vs. Wildchild -> Just like ELM, Jay gets picked until he loses that damn belt. WC's as good a bet as anyone in the fed to take it off him, though SWF Ultraviolent Championship Match - Japanese Deathmatch - Best of Five Bruce Blank © vs. "The Divine Wind" Akira Kaibatsu - I concur with Z. If everyone besides Thoth doesn't die, there will be major problems. However, on the topic of the actual match: Assuming Blank wrote for this one (which I'd guess he did), he'll pick up the win. SWF FROST Pre-PPV Extravaganza Blowout Extreme to the MAX! Singles Match Michael Cross vs. Ced Ordonez ->Can I write a match as Ced? And yay for more n00bs. Additional Clusterfuck Match Predictions: How many will actually turn in a match? 4 legitimate matches, two halfhearted entries, 1 haiku Who will be the MVP of the Clusterfuck? (You know, the guy that lasts almost the whole match but doesn't end up winning.) I like Coyote - I hope he lasts a long time.

Five point questions: 1) The winner of the 2006 Royal Rumble will be: Rey Mysterio 2) Who will be the "Ironman" of the 2006 Royal Rumble?: Kane 3) Who will last the shortest amount of time in the ring?: Brian Kendrick 4) Who will get the most eliminations? (If there is a tie, you get your points): Kane 5) Who will be the last man eliminated?: Shawn Michaels 6) Will the winner be from Smackdown or Raw?: Smackdown Three point questions...pick the man who will be in the Royal Rumble the LATEST (not who lasts the longest) out of the two choices below: 7) Gregory Helms or Orlando Jordan: Gregory Helms 8) JBL or Shawn Michaels: Shawn Michaels 9) Matt Hardy or Shelton Benjamin: Shelton Benjamin 10) Bobby Lashley or Kane: Kane 11) Chris Benoit or HHH: HHH 12) Chavo Guerrero or Rey Mysterio: Rey Mysterio 13) Rob Van Dam or The Boogeyman: RVD 14) Randy Orton or Booker T: Randy Orton 15) Chris Masters or Carlito: Chris Masters 16) Johnny Nitro or Joey Mercury: Nitro One point questions: 17) Who will draw #'s 1-4? (One point for each correct person): RVD, Matt Hardy, Carlito, Val Venis 18) Who will be the last four men in the ring? (One point for each correct person): Rey Mysterio, Shawn Michaels, Kane, HHH 19) Who will be the last RAW superstar eliminated?: Shawn Michaels 20) Who will be the last Smackdown superstar eliminated?: The Undertaker 21) Who will draw #'s 27-30 (One point for each correct person): The Undertaker, HHH, Chris Masters, Ric Flair 22) True or False: We will see a Boogeyman/Undertaker showdown: True 23) True or False: We will see a surprise return sometime during the Rumble: False 24) True or False: Somebody in the Rumble match will blade: False 25) True or False: Vince McMahon will interfere in the Rumble: False TIEBREAKER QUESTION: Give the exact time this year's Rumble match will last: 57:52

I dig, I dig. Nothing like a few weeks of build for a surprise, as well as built-in motivation to write (and win) Clusterfuck.

The fact that Ash won the JL World Title on that show is far more disturbing than nutshots, the Elk, and Cutthroat put together. And my favorite match stip of all-time (to write) was a Street Fight. I had two really good ones: One with Erek Taylor for the ICTV title, which he won, and one with Thoth for the World Title, which I won (although it might have been by default - I dunno). But I really liked the stip; it played to my character strengths and let you take the match a lot of different directions. As for my favorite stips to read: I was always a sucker for the gimmicky ones, like Mall Brawl and Hide 'n' Seek matches. I also really dug cage matches, which I thought read really well. Ladder matches, on the other hand, were never my favorite to read, despite them being my favorite gimmick match in real life.

Oh goodie, the Clan is back. Maybe I can become the first three-time member.

I was so out of my league there.

I spent New Year's doing a lot of things that I don't remember. I know that I called 13 people drunkenly during the night, I made nine straight shots in beer pong, and I drank a bottle of wine that apparently tasted like blackberry (all of these according to friends). And as the capper, I didn't know it was 2006 until 12:25 or so. Go me. And happy new year to all.

Best Wrestler in the last five years: 1. Chris Benoit 2. Kurt Angle 3. Rey Mysterio Best feud in the last five years: 1. HHH vs. Mick Foley, 2000 2. Batista vs. HHH, 2004-5 3. Kurt Angle vs. Edge, 2002 Best match in the last five years: 1. HHH vs. HBK vs. Benoit, WM XX (there live) 2. Angle vs. Benoit, RR 2003 (there live) 3. Jericho/Benoit vs. HHH/Austin, Raw May '01 Best brawler in the last five years: 1. Triple H 2. Mick Foley 3. JBL Best High Flyer in the last five years: 1. Rey Mysterio 2. Paul London 3. Um...Eddie? I dunno. Best Tag Team in the last five years: 1. Edge & Christian 2. The World's Greatest Tag Team 3. Los Guerrero's Most Underrated performer in the last five years: 1. Big Show 2. Kane 3. Chavo Guerrero Most Overrated performer in the last five years: 1. Chris Jericho 2. Edge 3. Booker T Best promo guy in the last five years: 1. The Rock 2. Christian 3. Kurt Angle Best PPV in the last five years: 1. Wrestlemania X7 2. Summerslam 2000 3. Wrestlemania XX Worst PPV in the last five years: 1. Taboo Tuesday 2005 2. Vengeance 2005 3. King of the Ring 2002 Most disgusting promotional tactic in the last five years: - Kiss My Ass Club Best promotional tactic in the last five years: - Eddie Guerrero and Chris Benoit, world champions

1. Do you think AJ Styles is a good worker? Yes. He's in constantly entertaining matches, which is the most important thing. a. Does he have good psychology? Short-term yes, long-term isn't as good b. Good selling? Same as above. Great at selling moves and intensity, but he has to ignore it later on to keep the match entertaining. c. Do you think he blows a lot of spots? He doesn't seem to blow many, and he definitely blows less than most people with a moveset as spotty as his. 2. Do you think AJ Styles is the ideal poster child for TNA, excluding his devotion to the company? a. Is there anyone better? If so, who? There are only two better choices to be the face of the company as of now: Ron Killings and Samoa Joe. Joe would be my personal choice. One of my friends, who thinks wrestling is downright retarded, knows who Samoa Joe is after seeing that six-man tag at the primetime Impact. Joe is the best choice, with AJ and Truth after him. 3. Do you think AJ Styles is charismatic? a. In ring charisma, crowd involvement Definitely, as other have said, Benoit-style charisma. You care about him based on nothing but his ringwork. b. Out of ring charisma, promos. He could use some work promo-wise, but that can be improved upon. Either give him a mouthpiece or some speaking lessons. 4. What's the best AJ Styles match you've seen, not just limited to TNA? The one I enjoyed the most was the 4-way match for the X Division belt at the very beginning of TNA. I loved that freaking match. The Ironman match at Bound For Glory was a lot of fun too. Haven't seen nearly enough of AJ to make a real definitive pick, though. 5. Do you think that AJ Styles has the "tools" to be a top-drawing money maker? At the level TNA is at right now, yes. But if it becomes legit WWE competition, he'd probably have to become a mid-level superstar, at that Benoit level or so. He'd always be a threat, and could be a perfectly good World Champ or X Champ, but not THE guy who becomes the face of the promotion. Joe could do this, however.

U2, The Joshua Tree, "Where The Streets Have No Name", "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For", "With Or Without You" (followed by "Bullet The Blue Sky") Awesomeness.

STTTUUUUUPPPPPPPPPPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDDDDDDDDD FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNN GGGGGGGGGGGGGGG BBBBBBBBBBBBBIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRRRRDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!