The Czech Republic

...donkey punch?

Chris Berman will rejoice when Bert "Be Home" Blyleven gets in the Hall.

No it wasn't ALF it was Stuart Scott and some other Monday Night Countdown people wetting their pants over Tom Brady walking into the stadium in a suit. Peyton Manning gets quotation marks around great? YOWCH

"OH MY GOD, HE'S WEARING A SUIT!!" Defend that.

Now Doug Christie. Is he black or white? See, I always thought he was white, or half-black. But his children appear to be named Ta'Kari and Chantel.

Enjoying the game I'm watching on Sunday afternoon is important to me. If they're not the Bears, I only care about the entertainment value of the game.

Excellent point. The New England Patriots don't exactly captivate a man's heart, do they. There are never any last-minute touchdown drives where they snatch victory from the jaws of defeat, and there are never any blowouts where the offense is so dazzling that Brady is benched by the 4th. Even the two damn Super Bowls were won on field goals. They just trudge through their schedule and score more points than the other team and it's not entertaining to watch. "BUT THAT'S FOOTBALL!" No it's boring. "Well it's not that they CAN'T, it's just that My Lord And Savior Bill Belichick doesn't let the team play to its full potential so as to hide their weaknesses." Well by the Super Bowl, you shouldn't have to worry about being figured out...you sure aren't dominating then. When will they prove it then if they're just "hiding" it? Pittsburgh had some close calls this year. The Colts have been a blast to watch. I hope either one gets to the Super Bowl before the Patriots.

I'm worried about the big government that will lie to my face and tell me my money is just fine with them, then laugh at me. Good, yes, but let's not kid ourselves into calling it noble.

What just happened?

You prefer winter, eh? Then you get your ass down here and shovel my driveway. I already did once and I have to again. And it's a loooooong driveway.

It's funny that the 500some Patriots fans on TSM just REFUSE to acknowledge that ESPN blows the team, when it's painfully evident to the fans of the other 31 teams. I mean, if they constantly talked up Rex Grossman, I'd be like "hell yeah ESPN loves my quarterback" not "WHAT? They do not! Stop making us look like favorites, you...favorites-looker! In fact, we don't get the credit we OUGHT to for being as awesome as we are, hah."

work?

You know, I saw Orton-HHH on Raw last night and it really didn't feel like a huge confrontation of superstars. It just felt like HHH against a face. I wasn't captivated at all. That's not how anyone should feel for a Wrestlemania match.

Yes, it would, but come on, King Chinlock isn't exactly an epic wrestler.

Holy crap. Those people just don't care. Get over yourself. That shit is funny.

I have emo glasses and I wear sweaters. But they're nice ones. Not shitty emo ones.

It was one o them symbolic bans I guess

Damaramu will be back. Either it's a temporary ban or he gets a new name. Nobody can give up TSM.

Coach should lay out JR and drape a USC flag on him. Coach should seriously show up wearing the Trojan Helmet. He needs to come out to the USC fight song. Just play that obnoxious little riff their band plays after every minor accomplishment, over and over again, on a loop. Are you DUMB?!?

I distinctly remember the Monday Night Countdown crew having an orgasm over Tom Brady in a suit. I'm pretty sure ESPN blows the Pats. The only people who don't agree are Patriots fans who feel guilty about it and don't want to be seen as ever having an advantage, so they proct it onto other teams: "blow the PATRIOTS? Heavens no, they blow the RED SOX!" Ditch the modesty: it's one big hummer for New England and you all know it.

Mia Hamm hates Chicago. She never gave reasoning, but Nomar asked that one of the places he not be traded to was Chicago because Mia hated it. After his tantrum in NY where he refused to start because he made a couple of errors in the previous games they had no problem shipping him there. Mia don't be that way

crumpidity?

Geddy, no, don't buy clothes from Abercrombie, no, please

There's also The Smiths Is Dead where I feel Billy Bragg's "Never Had No One Ever" is actually superior.

So I have two cats, and I was sitting with my cat Peutz-Peutz on the kitchen floor when all of a sudden The Baby jumps off the refrigerator onto her like he's Rocky the flying squirrel or some shit. He just spread his legs out and flattened her. Straight down. It was like she was crushed by the Monty Python foot.