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Great Acts of Stupidity

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I just knocked off my side view mirror while attempting to make my way between a parked truck and a curb while exiting through the back of a supermarket. Fuck. How much will that cost to get replaced?

 

Someone, post something greater or equally stupid to ease my pain.

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Depends on how old your car is and where you go. If you can, go to a junk yard and try to find a car you can take the mirror off and bring it to a cheap garage.

 

Lets see.... two DWI's. Last one was in January 1998. I've learned my friggen lesson after 3 years of probation and two months in jail.

 

Countless times I've left the lights on.

 

I wouldn't say this was too stupid because I was trying to wreck the car, but I brought my old Subaru 4-wheeling with 3 friends and I went off the path and rolled the car sideways into a ditch and destroyed the axle. My friend came down with his truck, towed the car out and I ripped the plates off, took everything I owned out of the car and left it in a Joys department store parking lot with the keys in the ignition and the title on the front seat. Not sure if someone took it or if it was towed by the store because it was gone two days later and I never heard anything from it.

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Driving home from the bar one night, absolutely hammered. One of my buddies asked me to drive on the island (the grassy area between the East-bound traffic and the West-bound traffic) So at the next break in the island I drove on, without slowing down at all. Getting on wasn't a problem, but the big ass crevice that I had to drive through to get off was.

 

Big whole + sharp curb + 45 mph = popped tire and destroyed rim.

 

Obviously can't drive on it, but obviously can't be found with the car either. So, parked the car and started walking home. (Ended up getting a ride from the cute neighbor, but that's a different story) End result was having to go to the junkyard in town to find a rim that would fit onto my jeep.

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Guest Insanityman

Well, I knew this guy who worked on a car and ended up cutting off this thumb. So he came to some dumb ass message board and posted for tips... what a loser.

 

 

Heh, actually, I was driving with my cousin while he was drunk (I figured he wasn't hammered enough to crash and kill us and otherwise I'd be stuck in middle of not-the-best part of Amboy). He played it all safe until he pulled in, smashing his side view mirror and put a minor dent in the back of the car when he pulled back in shock and hit the basketball hoop. It was funny for me.

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Recently, a friend of mine gave me a zippo that he didn't want anymore, which I decided that I could fix. I put in a new wick, new fluid, new flints, everything. And the damned thing wouldn't light.

 

 

...turns out I used Charcoal lighter fluid, which is incredibly poisonous when inhaled.

 

 

Yeah.

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Ummmm....not me but my brother.....the street next to ours dips WAY low...so when it rains and the drains are clogged it can feel up with about 5 feet of water in that dip. Plus the dip is about 15 feet across. So...here goes my dumbass brother in his HONDA ACCORD thinking "I'm going to drive through this LAKE in the road." So the dumbass gets in...starts floating and has to get out and SWIM to the other side while waiting for his car to float over there. Needless to say the car wouldn't start.

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Guest TheZsaszHorsemen
Driving home from the bar one night, absolutely hammered. One of my buddies asked me to drive on the island (the grassy area between the East-bound traffic and the West-bound traffic) So at the next break in the island I drove on, without slowing down at all. Getting on wasn't a problem, but the big ass crevice that I had to drive through to get off was.

 

Big whole + sharp curb + 45 mph = popped tire and destroyed rim.

 

Obviously can't drive on it, but obviously can't be found with the car either. So, parked the car and started walking home. (Ended up getting a ride from the cute neighbor, but that's a different story) End result was having to go to the junkyard in town to find a rim that would fit onto my jeep.

Yeah, drunk driving is COOL, man!

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Applying for a job at Ames a week before the "Going Out Of Business" sales started.

At least you weren't the guy who applied the week AFTER the "Going Out Of Business" sale started.

 

First month I had my current car, I was backing out of my parking spot and turned the wheel the wrong way, scraping my entire left front bumper against a concrete pillar.

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Guest The Real Nosferatu
Buying Shaq's second rap album...

That respect I had for you just plummeted about 100,000,000 pts.

We call that the "Scott Keith Ratio".

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Having sex with this girl Bridget, without a condom.

 

meandbridgit.jpg

 

Hell, look at her? Biggest whore ever, I probably have an STD thanks to her.

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Guest Agent of Oblivion

I watched a demolition derby with a head full of LSD once.

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Guest Random Hero
Having sex with this girl Bridget, without a condom.

 

meandbridgit.jpg

 

Hell, look at her? Biggest whore ever, I probably have an STD thanks to her.

Sure you don't mean wearing them sandals?

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Having sex with this girl Bridget, without a condom.

 

meandbridgit.jpg

 

Hell, look at her? Biggest whore ever, I probably have an STD thanks to her.

Well, you would have earned it. Don't call her a whore because YOU slept with her...what does that make you....? :P

 

 

I broke the handle off my refridgerator, and kneeled down to put it back on and gave it a yank to make sure that every thing was fine. Well, it broke off again and I thumbed my self in the eye with the yank and spent the next 45 minutes rolling around on the floor in pain(while laughing at myself at the same time). I am now have his floting black spot in my eye that makes me blind in my right eye if I look in a certain direction.

 

SO...fuck with my "permanent damage" stupidity.

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Guest Danny Dubya v 2.0
Having sex with this girl Bridget, without a condom.

 

meandbridgit.jpg

 

Hell, look at her? Biggest whore ever, I probably have an STD thanks to her.

Well, you would have earned it. Don't call her a whore because YOU slept with her...what does that make you....? :P

One more tugboat sunk into the big ol' stink bay, with the corpses of dead sailors still piling up on the ocean floor?

 

When I was six and still really really scared of nightmares, my sister promised me she'd kill the nightmare with a ridiculous toy trap system and I actually trusted her. She tried to take my teddy bear from me as part of the trap and I refused to let her take it, so I held onto the bear and she just dragged me on the floor until she bumped my head into the steel bottom part of my bed. Had to go to the hospital too.

 

It wasn't exactly one of her smartest moments either. She got beat so hard her ass fell off, so to speak. That and I got two weeks of school off with no consequences whatsoever and the aches only lasted three days.

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Having sex with this girl Bridget, without a condom.

 

meandbridgit.jpg

 

Hell, look at her? Biggest whore ever, I probably have an STD thanks to her.

Well, you would have earned it. Don't call her a whore because YOU slept with her...what does that make you....? :P

One more tugboat sunk into the big ol' stink bay, with the corpses of dead sailors still piling up on the ocean floor?

:P

 

 

Actually though, I think of when a guys, who are constantly looking for more sex, call women "whores" because they can get all the sex they want...thats just plain jealousy.

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Guest TheLukester

I once had a date with this girl, Zoe. I thought it would be a good idea to watch a movie. But I could not get anyone to take me to the video store and the only video we had in the house was Ernest Goes To Camp. It was the biggest mistake I ever made. She was not a fan of Ernest.

Edited by TheLukester

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