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the.weej

ASHES TO ASHES CARD, November 7th!

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The Smartmark's Wrestling Federation Presents...

A PPV EXTRAVAGANZA!

 

SWF ASHES TO ASHES 2004, LIVE, SUNDAY NOVEMBER 7TH FROM THE *SOLD OUT* EVENING NEWS ARENA IN MANCHESTER, ENGLAND!

 

FEATURING MUSIC BY FAITH NO MORE, "ASHES TO ASHES"!

(7pm PCT, 10pm EST; check local listings)

 

A LOOK BACK: Ashes to Ashes 2003, Ashes to Ashes 2002, Ashes to Ashes 2000

 

Card:

 

MAIN EVENT

WORLD TITLE BOUT

STREET FIGHT

Toxxic© vs Annie Eclectic

Ann, Annie, Onita, Eclectic, Ichiban, "Number One", Beezel, Mr. B, the Smooth Criminal, the Hardcore Queen, the Angel, Lady Red, one half of "America's Sweethearts," XF9er, Magnificent Seven, Carnie, Clannie, Catch-22, "Blargledyargle," Ash's acquisition, Thoth's disciple, Molly, Sydney and Wilson's love interest, third female bumped, second female Carnie, first female ICTV champion. When one looks back on it, Annie's career is long and distinguished, full of crazy twists in turns as it is. The woman of 1000 names, stables, alignments and comebacks has, despite all odds, seemed better after every one of them, and has at very long last come to what may be the culmination of her career. The man who stands in her way is a phenom, and it doesn't even seem fair that the most obvious advandage she had going into this match has been erased with the location. However, Annie can't let crowd static get in the way of becoming the first female world champion in fed history, and coming to the summit of a three year climb. Annie Eclectic vs The Straight Edge Sensation. It's Time.

Rules: None, essentially.

Send To: Chuck Woolery

 

HELL IN A CELL

"Grand Slam" Mark Stevens vs The Suicide King

In what will truly be the end of an era, "Grand Slam" Mark Stevens, knees nearly done, has stepped up for one last swing of the bat. Against him -- he's always been against him -- is the man he's been competing with for longer than he can remember, and will never live long enough for forget, the Suicide King. However, for a man who has held all the aces, along with every other card in the deck for virtually his whole career, there is little advantage for him with quite possibly the biggest thing he's ever put on the line. There's no shifty conctract clauses or referee saboteurs, secret rule changes or convenient aliances waiting to be debuted. No matter the outcome, this will be Mark Stevens' final contractual act within the SWF. The wager is merely each man's pride, and both have gone all-in.

Rules: The cage is approximately 18ft. high and has a diamiter about five feet wider than the ring around all sides. When both men enter the cell, the door will be closed and locked, theoretically preventing escape. Pinfall and submission rules.

Send To: Chuck Woolery

 

SINGLES MATCH

Manson vs Nathaniel Kibagami

Nathaniel Kibagami has come back, and he has made no secret about where his attention has been focused. Unfortunately, nothing is going to be coming that easy -- but has it ever? Manson has been the everpresent understudy of the SWF, one of the oldest faces on the roster, but a man who has never recieved some well earned veterans respect. When Kibagami used one of his videos to put a scare into Toxxic, it was the straw that broke the camel's back, and Manson has retaliated the best way he knows how: But putting a fist into Kibagami's face! Before Kibagami can get to Toxxic, he must go through Manson; and while many men would write this off, Nathaniel, more than anyone else, is aware of what a desperate man can do...

Rules: Standard singles match

Send To: 5_moves_of_doom

 

TAG TEAM MATCH

Todd Cortez & ??? vs Sean Davis & ???

The ever so ambiguous ???-man interjects himself into this dispute and has made two profound arguments, for both sides, no less. Worth keeping in mind is the particularly interesting meeting Revolution 0 leader Toxxic had with 'a certain someone' in a coffeeshop before the last show, someone who seems almost certain to have interjected themselves somehow... Someone used to enigmas, and someone who should not be taken so lightly...

Rules: Standard tag team match. Remember the tag ropes!

Send To: chirs3

 

ICTV TITLE BOUT

ROYAL BEATING MATCH

"The Icon" Max King© vs Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix

Let's settle this. Maddix and Max have been at each others throats for months now, ever since King's surprising upset of Maddix many moons ago. Not known for letting little indiscressions go easily, as Alan Clark would attest, Maddix and King have let everything come to a boiling point and deigned that it come to a head at Ashes to Ashes! Of course, just facing off would be too easy -- a particularly disturbing stipulation, of King's own design, has been implimented for this match.

Rules: A cage of a special design, different from the one used for the HITC later tonight (no door, no roof) will be lowered onto the ring once both men have entered it. From there, things only get worse, as Max and Landon will be tied together at the wrist with a leather strap. Pinfall/submission rules take affect until a fall is scored, at which point the winner of the fall must touch all four turnbuckles. Consecuitively.

Send To: Thoth

 

WOMEN'S TITLE MATCH

SINGLES MATCH

Kelly Connelly© vs Megan Skye

Created as little more than a vanity belt, the SWF "Women's Title" is actually going to be contested on the PPV, and for the second time in two weeks, no less. Kelly Connelly and Megan Skye will face off right before their men fight in one of the most anticipated matchups of the night. The most fortunate aspect of this match? No eVil black ferret-weasels need apply.

Rules:Standard singles match.

Send To: Chuck Woolery

 

SINGLES MATCH

Andrea Montgomery vs David Cross

One half of the tag team champions takes on another person who's been in limbo for a little while, Andrea Montgomery. After failing twice to cash in on a shot at the SWF world title, Andrea has not seen much of anything consistently for the last couple of shows. Andrea has the skill, and many of the victories, but she simply doesn't seem to have the luck -- there was talk of her impromptu tag partner, the Birdman, returning from his haitus tonight to help her face Cross and Fury for the tag team titles, but Fury's win on Smarkdown scrapped that. Instaed, she takes on Fury's better half in the form of David Cross.

Rules: Standard singles match.

Send To:chirs3

 

CRUSIERWEIGHT TITLE MATCH

"Hollywood" Spike Jenkins© vs Austin Sly

Rematch, take deux! Spike Jenkins continues to befuddle all with his insofar impressive Crusierweight title run, and he takes on former champion Austin Sly for the belt on the big stage! Sly's really been bouncing around lately, unable to get purchase on anything in the fed, but few things can narrow minds like gold... for better or for worse.

Rules: Cruiser rules.

Send To: 5_moves_of_doom

 

HARDCORE TITLE MATCH

Carnage© vs Christian Fury

Rematch time! Ex-hardcore champion Chris Fury tries to win back his belt, as he and Carnage jerk the PPV curtain and try to get things kickstarted!

Rules: None!

Send To: Suicide King

 

(Decorum Notes: The entrance setting is a delapitaed church, complete with an alter and huge effing crucifix to the side of the walkway. Elaborate stained glass windows flank the gothic arch that wrestlers enter through, with a working organ opposite side the alter. There are broken pews and lit candelabras all over the place.)

(Z Note: A2A '01 is conspicuous in its absense because the IGNWF archive project only got about half-done before everyone got sick of it. If anyone wants to go to the effort of retrieving it, or giving me their Insider, I'll host it, 'cause that'd be kinda' nifty. My last card ever, unless I get called for fill-in duty sometime in the future. Write one for the Gipper!)

(Send all shit to Chuck Woolery)

Edited by realitycheck

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hey... good news bookers, you don't have to ignore me anymore... because I'm tired of even trying. Adios.

 

Not like any of you will care anyways.

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hey... good news bookers, you don't have to ignore me anymore... because I'm tired of even trying. Adios.

 

Not like any of you will care anyways.

Everyone look at this as a chance to promo away… because, well, hey, just write. If you don’t promo, don’t expect yourself to get booked in a very good match come Ashes 2 Ashes.

 

I can't remember you promoing, which might have helped your cause.

 

I dunno why you haven't been put on the cards recently while the Evan Wolfe's and Danny Dagda's (well, his lights are on but who knows if there's really anybody home) continue to get booked...but have you PMed any of the bookers about it? That would have been the first thing to do. You may not have been checked into the active list. Plus our bookers are prone to mistakes and some don't have their finger right on the pulse (*cough*MeganvsKellywhichIdidapromofor*cough*) ...cause for the most part, they're busy people.

 

PM 'Van Siclen' and ask to be put on the card against someone who likely won't show. Or, if not, do a promo for the show. Or write a match yourself. Take matters into your own hands.

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No match but that's ok, since i've had an idea that's inspired me with something to do for the PPV and beyond that should help give me some renewed direction, that even i shouldn't be able to screw up and add to my mile long list of failures and missed opportunities.

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Connelly/Skye has been edited in. Sorry, I did read all the promos on the last show, but I guess I skipped over that part. If I didn't have a PM about a match, I didn't book it.

 

Stryke, Kaine, my apoligies; I have an idea to make it up to you on Storm, if you'd like to me to suggest it to Mike.

 

-Z

Edited by realitycheck

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I take it this is a word limit-less card because it's a PPV, right?

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Two points: first, it's the Manchester Evening News Arena. That's why it's so frustrating when JR says 'Fans in Great Britain! The WWE will be coming to the Manchester Evening News Arena in Manchester!'

 

Secondly, as a general note: If you are trying to get face pops, do NOT wear a Manchester United shirt. Anyone wearing a Man U shirt in Manchester gets BOOED. Wear a Manchester City shirt and all will be fine.

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So... on the subject of face pops...

 

does anyone on that side of the pond give a flying fig about baseball, and if so, what cap should Grand Slam wear?

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So... on the subject of face pops...

 

does anyone on that side of the pond give a flying fig about baseball, and if so, what cap should Grand Slam wear?

No and no idea. To steal a phrase, 'it's just not cricket, is it'. I seemed to remember Manchester United having a working deal with the Yankees of some sort at some time, but that's about as far as interest in American sport goes since they stopped showing the NBA on terrestrial T.V.

 

Secondly, as a general note: If you are trying to get face pops, do NOT wear a Manchester United shirt. Anyone wearing a Man U shirt in Manchester gets BOOED. Wear a Manchester City shirt and all will be fine.

 

As a United fan I entirely disagree. It should read 'anyone wearing a Man U shirt in ENGLAND gets booed'. Besides, I might want to steal the 'who the hell are the Vodafones' line I saw in the OAO Raw Thread a while back.

 

On the arena subject, if you're looking to save time then it can be called just the MEN Arena. On the music...I'm appalled you didn't use "Ashes To Ashes" by Tears For Fears.

 

Anyway, cheers to the Z for putting in the women's match.

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No match but that's ok, since i've had an idea that's inspired me with something to do for the PPV and beyond that should help give me some renewed direction, that even i shouldn't be able to screw up and add to my mile long list of failures and missed opportunities.

You should job to me in a dark match. Just like at the last three PPV's. :)

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As a United fan I entirely disagree.

Yeah, but as a United fan your opinion hardly counts. But then again you lost 2-0 to PORTSMOUTH, so maybe I should go easy.

 

...naaaaah.

 

 

Oh, and Grand Slam - absolutely no-one gives a shit about baseball over here. Just an SWF cap will probably do it.

 

 

Edit to add: Note for Americans and other aliens - Manchester United are similar to what I understand the New York Yankees to be. Annoyingly good at what they do, stinking rich, loved by loads of people who aren't from Manchester (or even Britain), and hated by everyone else in the country. There's no middle ground with Man U - you either love 'em or hate 'em

Edited by MikeofEvil

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A few notes:

 

One, markers, I hate to put pressure on you guys but I'd greatly appreciate it if all matches were marked and in to me by midnight EST.

 

Two, writers, I know there's been difficulties with some of you guys writing lately, but I'm going to emphasize this: I really, really don't want to see any double no-shows. If you think you're going to no-show, PM the other guy in your match and make sure that they're showing, and if they're having trouble too then put together a collab match. I don't want to see a PPV that's marred by no-shows.

 

And finally... I'm still looking for three or four more guys for the angle I mentioned in Sarah's hijacked thread. If you have any interest, or are lacking plans from A2A to Twas the Fight, PM me and I can give you some instant direction.

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Guest carnage

So my match with Christian Fury is in a church?

Just want to make sure so I don't write something wildly different that what i'm suppossed to.

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So my match with Christian Fury is in a church?

Just want to make sure so I don't write something wildly different that what i'm suppossed to.

No... It's still in an arena with bunches of people and the same set up as a normal arena (unless MEN is totally different than what I'm thinking... Toxx? A little help here?).

 

The props are set up like a church... But they're just that. Props.

 

Cleared up for ya now? :)

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So my match with Christian Fury is in a church?

Just want to make sure so I don't write something wildly different that what i'm suppossed to.

No... It's still in an arena with bunches of people and the same set up as a normal arena (unless MEN is totally different than what I'm thinking... Toxx? A little help here?).

 

The props are set up like a church... But they're just that. Props.

 

Cleared up for ya now? :)

Yes.

 

To clarify, the MEN is a regular indoor arena. Carnage, the bit about the church relates to the way the entrance way and stage is set-up for the entire show rather than being specific to your match...in the WWE uses different stages for Pay Per Views, we do too.

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Hmmmmmmmm, so tempting to have a little cameo in this one.

Manchester is close enough to Birmingham and all.

 

Anyone need to get their ass kicked on this ppv?

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Anyone need to get their ass kicked on this ppv?

Heh... I'm sure a lot of people do...

 

But, picking one without a match might be beneficial. ;)

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I nominate Xero.

 

Oh and Dace - I'm going to print out my match 1,000 time, drive down to Reading, find where you live and paste it all over the walls of your halls. Just to make you SUFFER~!

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Whoa, wait a minute.

 

Toxxic, your record is 32-7? Holy snap.

 

-Z

Uh-huh.

 

One pinfall loss to Alan Clark

 

One tag loss (w/ Jimmy Liston) vs Flesher and Grand Slam (FLesher pinned Liston)

 

One strap match loss to Janus

 

One pinfall loss to Kibagami

 

One ladder match loss to Janus

 

One tag loss (w/Jamie Drazon) vs Flesher and Landon (Flesher pinned me. With my own fucking move, the bastard :))

 

One pinfall loss to Jonny Dangerous

 

And a WHOLE LOT of wins via no-show.

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