WWE General Discussion - September 2007

[jester 0]

Poor Chris Masters.

 

WWE: You have a great physique! We shall push you!

 

Masters: Great!

 

WWE: Wait, steroids are evil! The company is cracking down on steroids!

 

Masters: Ok, I guess I will stop using them.

 

WWE: Look how thin you are! We shall stop pushing you as a threat and have HHH mock you for the way you look!

 

Masters: Uh...okay, I will go back on the juice then.

 

WWE: You are roided up! You are suspended!

 

Masters: [Head explodes]

[LJSexay 0]

poor guy.

[CBright7831 0]

Story about WWE Championship challenger, Mr. Randall Orton:

 

Hey, just got back from Green Bay, WI. today and I just wanted to pass along a note from after the show.

 

We had went to a local bar afterwards, and that seemed the place to be! RIght when we got there we saw Kennedy (who we were THRILLED with seeing as he is suspended). We got our pictures with him as well, awesome guy! Also there were Carlito, Beth Phoenix, Sandman, Tommy Dreamer, Santino Marella, Coach, Kevin Thorn, Cody Rhodes, Shelton Benjamin, and last but not least, Randy Orton. I will get back to him in a minute. Everyone else here was awesome, signing autographs, pictures, whatever fans wanted. I even heard Kennedy say he would see Coach on October 1st. Must be when his suspension is over. Anyway, they eventually moved the party to the upstairs to get some privacy.

 

As they were going up my friend asked Randy Orton if he could have a quick picture. Orton said, "everyone wants a quick picture." Then Orton took the camera upstairs with him and proceeded to throw it off, down to the bar. Luckily enough some other guy caught it and gave it back to my friend. Low and behold he realizes his sim card is gone from his camera. Eventually the police came and he explained he just wanted his card back, it had all our pictures from RAW on it. The officers questioned Orton, asked my friend if $100 would cover it. My friend said that was fine. Well it turns out Orton left right after the cops questioned him and had to pull him over to talk to him again. Turns out he autographed the $100 with his name. He addressed it, "To Dipshit". That pretty much sums up everything I have heard about Orton right there. He is a super ass. Everyone else was cool though.

 

Shaun Poff

 

PS (I will have a scan of the $100 later tonight, let me know if you want me to email you a copy of it)

 

[Atticus Chaos 0]

Meh, one side of the story. For some reason I doubt that guy was as polite as he's claiming. And I don't know if the police answer calls about stolen sim cards either.

[HollywoodSpikeJenkins 0]

Thats still a pretty cool story.

[Atticus Chaos 0]

Source: Wrestling observer newsletter

 

Due to the looming congressional hearings, WWE has offered to pay for any ex wrestler’s rehab if they wanted to seek help. Even though this may seem as a good move from WWE, as it could potentially help a good amount of struggling ex-employee’s lives, it does come across as a personal relations stunt following all the scandal reports that have made the news across the nation.

 

Also, it doesn’t appear as if WWE is promoting this offer so many former employees may not even know how to seek treatment or know anything about this offer.

[Enigma 0]

I'm sure Sherri Martel could have used that.

 

She overdosed on pain killers that she was taking because she had crippling back pain from all her years of bumping. She needed hardcore back surgery which she couldn't afford and WWE wouldn't help her with.

[Atticus Chaos 0]

I know Sherri would have liked WWE to pay for her surgery, and hoped they might offer. But did she ever straight up ask them for the cash and got turned down? It's possible Vince wasn't aware of her situation.

[mysterious_w 0]

Who do you think will take up the offer then? Jannetty is the only name that popped into my head immediately.

[hyperchord24 0]

Poor Chris Masters.

 

WWE: You have a great physique! We shall push you!

 

Masters: Great!

 

WWE: Wait, steroids are evil! The company is cracking down on steroids!

 

Masters: Ok, I guess I will stop using them.

 

WWE: Look how thin you are! We shall stop pushing you as a threat and have HHH mock you for the way you look!

 

Masters: Uh...okay, I will go back on the juice then.

 

WWE: You are roided up! You are suspended!

 

Masters: [Head explodes]

I thought HHH did this to Lashley, not Masters

[Broward83 0]

He did it to Masters as well on RAW one night. Made a joke about the weight he lost and in some "attack", left him lying in a bathroom stall or something like that

[cmpunk04 0]

from wrestling observer site. really funny read

 

 

Times are tough for WWE right now. Several of their top wrestlers and that pleasant Japanese man were suspended for getting caught with banned substances in their body. The end result is a crushing blow to the already anorexic rosters on each show. As such, it should be viewed as a breath of fresh air that two of the youngest and brightest superstars in the company are stepping up and giving us one of the most anticipated, epic battles of the modern era this side of Joe vs. Kobashi, Misawa vs. Kawada, and Roe vs. Wade.

 

Of course, I am referring to Big Daddy V vs. the Boogeyman, scheduled to take place on the 18th of September in the year of our Lord, 2007. Rarely does a battle of two of the greatest in-ring titans of all time occur on free television, so I found it best to preview the bout seeing as how I am the official ECW authority in these parts. Let's start with a little history:

 

On June 11th in the year of our Lord, 2007, a draft occurred on Monday Night Raw. One of the bigger surprises of the evening was a man getting shipped from Smackdown to ECW. It was a man everyone thought was going to end up on Raw. It was a man known for having the technical prowess of the puroresu greats. It was a man known for being more aggressive in the ring than anyone else of his generation. It was a man known for missing a few teeth. I am, of course, referring to the Boogeyman. The mere thought of this man on the ECW roster brought a wide smile to CM Punk's face (who was in the ring when the good news came about) and subsequently, the heart of each parent with young a WWE fan was warmed at the thought of this child-friendly babyface entertaining their children every Tuesday night, teaching them key morals to help them grow into successful adults.

 

The Boogeyman took the world of ECW by storm. Having recovered from the loss of his companion Little Boogeyman earlier in the year at the hands of Mark Henry, Boogey approached his game with a newfound dedication and focus the likes of which had never been seen. However, his winning streak was soon put to a screeching halt at the hands of Matt Striker's new protogé. As with Boogey, this man had a renewed focus, a renewed wardrobe, and a renewed vocabulary. This man was Bid Daddy V. He had shed his delusions of romantic grandeur once he realized that bikini models do not find morbidly obese men whose only flattering clothing is oversized pajamas attractive, and following the tutelage of Striker, destroyed the Boogeyman in his ECW debut, slamming him through a desk and driving him head-first into a chalkboard. In the next few weeks, V steamrolled the competition on ECW, taking down some of the greatest wrestlers around today. V was out to prove that he is indeed a man on a mission.

 

V's dominance was short-lived, as Boogey, being the true ring warrior he is, made his much anticipated comeback to gain some measure of revenge. Since then, the feud has escalated and become more than personal. The two met once more in a fatal four-way match, and once again after that as Boogey was attacked by V after Boogeyman and Striker went to a thirty minute, time limit draw two weeks ago. But now Boogey has had time to rest. He is preparing a strategy to take down his arch-nemesis once and for all. And we should be honored to get the chance to watch it.

 

Here, we have two opponents who are very different from each other, yet share some striking similarities. As such, I feel it is appropriate to profile each wrestler separately, highlighting their stats, strengths, and what their game plans should be heading into their Budokan Hall main even-level match this Tuesday.

 

**Big Daddy V**

 

-Resides in the burrow of Harlem in New York City.

-Stands in at 6-foot-9 and weighs a healthy 485 pounds.

-Known for his strong style technique that hearkens back to the glory days of Stan Hansen and Steve Williams.

-Pre-reinvention, sodomized his opponents into submission during matches.

-Has been kidnapped by the Undertaker.

-Dated Lillian Garcia and Trish Stratus.

-Looks an awful lot like the guy who won King of the Ring twelve years ago.

-Can recite lines from the film No Holds Barred verbatim. Just ask him, what's that smell?

-Enjoys eating at Applebees.

-Attended all three years of Lilith Fair.

 

**Big Daddy V**

 

-Born in Phoenix, Arizona on Halloween in the year of our Lord, 1964.

-Moved to the Bottomless Pit after a day at the Grand Canyon without sunscreen caused an extreme discoloration of his skin, thus deeming him unfit for mainstream society.

-Stands in at 6-foot-2 and weighs in at 265 pounds.

-Wrestles a puroresu style as an homage to his hero and mentor Masanobu Fuchi.

-Appeared as a contestant on Tough Enough before his incident.

-Worked a show-stealing match against Booker T at Wrestlemania 22.

-Favorite film is Howard's End.

-Owns each complete season of the television prison drama Oz on DVD.

-Follows a strict vegan diet.

-Devout Christian.

 

**Tazz's Keys to Victory**

 

This match will be a long, deliberate bout between two smart mat-workers. Though V likes to dominate early, he will know better than to use this tactic against the lightening quick Boogey. V's best bet is go on the defensive and wait for Boogey to make a mistake. Boogey will likely be looking to shoot in on V and wrestle the big man down. This is when V should move in for the kill by doing what he does best: stiff knife-edge chops and forearm blows. Once the mistake is made and the assault can begin, V mustn't allow an inch. He needs to stay on Boogey, keep him grounded and cornered, and simply overpower him. When the time is right, finish him off with strong lariat. Hell, throw him a curveball and nail a deep arm drag or two.

 

Though try as he might, V will not be able to keep up in chain wrestling with Boogey, whose amateur background will surely work to his advantage should the situation arise. Boogey really needs to keep distance between him and V. Like V, he enjoys finishing his opponents off early, but he will be unable to go in for his own kill early on, so his best bet is to wait it out. He is not powerful enough to go punch for punch with V, so short, quick attacks over an extended period of time will not only keep the big man at bay (thus rendering his striking arsenal useless), but it will also wear him down. Boogey is known for his 60-minute classics, so his best bet is to do something he is fully capable of and keep V off balance by trying to go the distance, tire him out, then systematically wear him down before finishing him off for good.

 

**Final Prediction**

 

When all is said and done, I fully expect V to put down his foe once and for all when Boogey makes the mistake of trying to get too flashy with his offense. I cite the ending of Hansen vs. Kobashi at Champion's Carnival in the year of our Lord, 1993, for precedent. Kobashi attempted a top-rope diving maneuver and was met with a nasty lariat from Hansen, which ultimately cost him the match. Expect Boogey to make a similar mistake and when all is said and done, Big Daddy V will emerge victorious.

 

Now it would be callous of me to preview a match of this scale by myself, so I've brought in some other experts for their opinions on the matter.

 

**Dan Wahlers**

 

I was honored to be asked by Ryan to give my thoughts on an upcoming classic match in the making. This match will be the George Hackenschmidt vs. Frank Gotch of our generation. It will make you forget about Flair/Steamboat. Austin/Rock? Please...we're talking a match of epic proportions coming your way on this Tuesday night's "ECW on Sci Fi" program. The Boogeyman vs. Big Daddy V!

 

I can only speak for myself, but I know I've been waiting my entire life to have the opportunity to write about a match this big. I've cleared my entire schedule on Tuesday night. I don't want to miss one minute of this monumental encounter. The Boogeyman and his worms, Big Daddy V and his umm....girth. It's sure to be an instant ***** classic. This is a hard match to call, because what you have are two mat technicans at the top of their game. You'd behard pressed to find someone that does a fireman's carry take over as well as The Boogeyman. Watching this match will be like watching Picasso and Da Vinci painting a wonderous piece of art work. Two of the best wrestlers in the business today showing you what WWE, and more specifically ECW is all about. The "ECW" chantswill be thunderous, as the crowd hangs on every hold, and every near fall. In the end, I think Big Daddy V's enormous size and weight advantage will be too much for The Bottomless Pit's favorite resident to overcome. If The Boogeyman has a chance he has to use his speed and quickness to take the big man off his vertical base. But that's easier said than done, especially when you tip the scales at well over 500lbs, and have heaving breasts that would make Dolly Parton envious. I'd have to go with Big Daddy V in a squeaker. The guidance of Matt Striker, one of the best managers in our industry today, will spell the difference in this one. You can't underestimate the wisdom of a grizzled ring veteran like Matt Striker. Big Daddy V will get the duke after his springboard corkscrew moonsault. The crowd will most definitely be chanting "This is awesome" when all the smoke clears. Whatever you do, make sure you're in front of your TV at 10pm on Tuesday night for this one, or at the very least have your DVR, Tivo, or VCR set to record this masterpiece. You never know when they might need some new torture devices down at Guantanamo Bay.

**Todd Martin**

 

I give Big Daddy V the size advantage, but I think Boogey Man is more crafty and has the endurance. I like Boogey via arm bar in the third round.

 

**Joe Babinsack**

 

My feeling is complete indifference.

 

***************

 

Derek Burgan and the good doctor, Keith Lipinski could not be reached for comment as they were busy investigating the Project 161 mystery. Dave Meltzer has been meditating heavily in preparation for the match since it was announced and as such, has stopped answering his phone. Nevertheless, we have three expert opinions: one who views this as a simple test of endurance, one who believes the teachings of a wise master will make the difference, and one who is so overcome with anticipation of the match that he has gone numb.

 

One thing is for sure: this will be making highlight reels for years to come. Foley diving off of the Cell will seem like nothing compared to the amount of coverage we will be seeing in forthcoming months. Surely, the final thrilling moments of this confrontation will be played out on Sportscenter for hours on end. Expect this to top many Match of the Year lists in December, as well. The winner will undoubtedly go on to be heralded as not only the unequivocal best of his generation, but likely of all time as well. Merchandise sales will sore and his picture will appear on Wheaties boxes and he will get cameos in unnecessary sequels to movies that were only so-so in the first place. The rub from this match will be beyond anything ever seen or even dreamed of.

 

At this point, Tuesday seems so far away, but thankfully, Unforgiven is tonight and will give us our wrestling fix in the meantime. Tune in Tuesday night after ECW to find out who the winner was and hear the reactions of the some of the industry's greats and, of course, of yours truly. This is an exciting time to be a wrestling fan and we have Big Daddy V and the Boogeyman to thank for it. They are the heroes of our generation. May they continue their careers long into their elderly age allowing them to do what they do best: put smiles on our faces. See you Tuesday.

[Steve J. Rogers 0]

Anyone think that they should bring Rock back to promote his next film and do a quick program putting over MVP?

 

Eh, just a thought I guess.

[CBright7831 0]

Anyone think that they should bring Rock back to promote his next film and do a quick program putting over MVP?

 

Eh, just a thought I guess.

The Rock was on Jim Rome is Burning. Nothing earth shattering, went something like this:

 

Says he’s no longer The Rock but became Dywane Johnson, the actor, a few years ago, retired quietly to not make a big production about it. Which is why he keeps getting asked about it, says he’s done.

 

Says he wrestled because he loved it, grew up around it, though he always loved football and Miami. He was always interested in wrestling though, wants to get into Sitcom television

 

Says The Gameplan is a big comedy, had been waiting for the right material, felt this was it. He kinda appreciates the happy ending aspect that Studio Disney always gives you.

 

Ruptured an Achilles tendon on the set. “Most severe injury I’ve ever suffered” got hurt in football and in wrestling, but nothing like that. Delayed production for 2 months

 

Approves of the coach @ Miami and thinks he’s the right guy to turn the program around.

 

On Benoit: Says he was a great guy. The guy he knew was a tremendous guy and he couldn’t figure out why. Hated to see it happen. Felt it was awful when he heard it happened; knew the family, says it was difficult to handle.

 

Misses the crowd interaction most about wrestling. Says you don’t get a live reaction like you do in wrestling. “In Wrestling, if a joke bombs, you know it right away”

[Enigma 0]

Jim Ross said this in his most recent blog on his website:

 

People need to realize that The Rock will never wrestle a match in WWE again. He is a movie star now and has moved on. I don't know how to make it any clearer than that.

[EVIL~! alkeiper 0]

That Wrestling Observer article was abysmal. I couldn't make it through the whole thing.

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

Jim Ross said this in his most recent blog on his website:

 

People need to realize that The Rock will never wrestle a match in WWE again. He is a movie star now and has moved on. I don't know how to make it any clearer than that.

 

I would have said that the WWF would convince him to come back at some point after his acting career bombs out but with all the scandals against WWF lately, unless that miraculously clears up, I doubt he'd want to reassociate himself with wrestling.

 

I just wonder if they'll try and put him in the HOF anytime soon.

[tbondrage99 0]

I'd say that Austin would put Austin in before they put The Rock in. They seem to like to have one huge superstar a year going in so I doubt they would blow both in one year.

[canadafour 0]

Anybody read William Regal's book? And if they did was it any good???

Thanks

[Australian Pride 0]

Regal's book is a belter. Unlike some other current WWE stars who have written bios (coughHBKcough) he has an interesting tale to tell and actually takes responsibility for his actions.

[tbondrage99 0]

Anybody read William Regal's book? And if they did was it any good???

Thanks

 

I own it. I liked it alot actually, of the Autobiographies I have read I would probably say its the best one after Foley's. Take note of course that I'm a huge Regal fan as well. A good percentage of it talks about his drug problems but he also takes alot of time on getting into the business working carnivals, getting his big break in WCW and WWE and all of the other stuff you would expect. I thought it was a great read and well worth the money I laid down for it. Of course everyone does have a different opinion someone else might of read it and thought it was shit, so I wouldn't buy it based on my opinion alone.

[luke-o 0]

Interesting fact about Batista:

 

Since August 2006, Batista has been involved in every World Heavyweight Championship match on PPVs featuring SmackDown talent except for two. In the two pay-per-views in which he wasn't involved in a title match, he was in the main event anyway (Armageddon 2006 and No Way Out 2007). Furthermore, his title match at tonight's Unforgiven pay-per-view will be his seventh consecutive title shot at a pay-per-view.

[goldengreek 0]

Ken Anderson taking on Austin Aries, and looking a good 30lbs lighter

 

He's sure bulked up a lot since then.

 

The match itself was pretty good, but the commentary was horrible.

Thats CM Punk on commentary

[humongous2002 0]

According to the Wrestling Observer Newsletter, the confirmed 30-day suspensions include Charlie Haas, Edge, Gregory Helms, John Morrison, William Regal, Mr. Kennedy, Umaga, Funaki, Chavo Guerrero.

 

For most of the list, I could see them being on steroids, but the ones highlighted I'm still going WTF?

 

 

Heres is the thing about steroids. They are not neccesarily just to make you "jacked up". They help your body recover from bumps, bruises and soreness. Some people claim that is the main advantage to use them for weightlifting. You can work out for 4 hours in a day and go to the gym the next day and do it again.

 

I saw a documentary about steroids once. They interviewed a Woman who was about 25 years old, a long distance runner who ran in 10K runs and such. She was about 5' 7" and maybe 110 lbs. She quit using steroids because she felt guilty about going from a good runner to DESTROYING running fields on a regular basis. She was burying the competition so easily she said she felt guilty about cheating to win, so she quit.

 

Its not just about putting on muscle mass.

Or maybe they bought roids so they could sell it to other wrestlers smart enough to do things under the table instead of dealing with having their names on a doctor's list.

 

[Enigma 0]

WWE has released Sonny Siaki from his developmental contract.

[Enigma 0]

A fan who was sitting on floor level at Unforgiven reported to Slam! that his two signs gotten taken away by WWE agents. The signs were "Beth Phoenix's Jaw Does HGH" and "WWE: Signature Pharmacy All-Stars!"

[Scroby 0]

A fan who was sitting on floor level at Unforgiven reported to Slam! that his two signs gotten taken away by WWE agents. The signs were "Beth Phoenix's Jaw Does HGH" and "WWE: Signature Pharmacy All-Stars!"

.....and he didn't expect his signs to be taken away?

[Vampiro69 0]

I would be amazed if they didn't take his signs away.

[mysterious_w 0]

You know ECW's sign guy trick of putting a stop sign between two bits of card and making a sign on one of them? Has no one thought of that for some slightly risque signs?

[LivingLegendGaryColeman 0]

You know ECW's sign guy trick of putting a stop sign between two bits of card and making a sign on one of them? Has no one thought of that for some slightly risque signs?

 

That may not always work depending on if it is live or a taping.

 

Last time I went, I had a sign confiscated off of me after it was on TV. I went to an ECW/Smackdown taping and from the TitanTron view, it was on during ECW and I even saw it on the airing of Smackdown before it got taken away a few matches in. If anyone goes to ytmnd.com, I made a Brian Peppers sign. It had a picture of him and said "Brian Peppers, Google It".

 

Also, I made a sign that said "I Miss Kaite Vick" and it was totally on camera during the taping, but edited out of TV. I was sitting pretty close, so as Kane was climbing the turnbuckle, right above him, it said "I MISS KATIE VICK" and people in my section laughed. When I watched the show on TV, they edited it to a tight shot of his head.