Vomiting for the first time in 17 years.

[Guest Jesus Freaks on Coke]

I'm nearly certain that the culprit was expired roast beef, purchased from a grocery store that was not Jewel-Osco. This was hard and miserable work. Binge drinkers and bulemics, I'll never understand you.

 

If you go back and read my posting history from this evening, you can kind of tell I was in a foul mood from about 11 to 1. Look at me, bitching about 2008 albums and the popularity of golf. This was the work of the intestinally disturbed.

[Jingus 0]

If it helps, I've been sharing your suffering. Woke up early this morning with a harsh stomach ache; tried induced vomiting and pepto, neither seemed to help much. Eventually I just said fuck it and took some knockout pills to go back to sleep. The pain was mostly gone when I woke back up, but I've felt bizarrely weak all day, just walking up the stairs feels like a chore. I think a bunk batch o' bananas was the culprit.

 

...17 years? Really? Who are you, Seinfeld?

[FroGG_NeaL 0]

I woke up with a terrible hangover/migraine yesterday and threw up like 5 times in an hour. It was the first time I'd threw up from anything alchohol related in years. I didn't even drink that much, and I never throw up from drinking, unless it's something retarded like trying to chug a fith of Popov Vodka or somethin' shitty like that... The migraine is what did me in. I always throw up with those mofuckers. I've bled to death once, and I can honestly say that a full-blown migraine is the worst fucking pain I've ever been through.

 

The best thing to do after you throw up, is drink as much water as you can until you eventually throw the water up. It'll clean out all that regurgated shit that's caking your insides and making you sick/weak/tired whatever... then you'll feel better.

[Guest Jesus Freaks on Coke]

Oh, I get migraines as well, at least in the past year or two. My health is rapidly failing me. I might have to retool my stance on nationalized healthcare (I never need to see a doctor and if I die, then so be it).

[Jingus 0]

I've bled to death once

 

. . .

 

 

How did that work?

[Fökai 0]

Food poisoning is absolutely the worst thing I've ever experienced in my life - there are fewer than ten instances in which I can recall vomiting (pretty much all alcohol-related), but at least those headaches subsided. I estimated projectile vomiting TWENTY-FIVE TIMES in a three hour bout with food poisoning, where the subject of said food poisoning (chinese noodles) exited after the second or third time around. That left the remaining instances to consist of blood and some type of clear oil-like fluid that I never knew existed in my body. I had contemplated ending my life bashing my head against the base of my toilet, but I stopped after seeing double. They said a mild concussion. But...at least the burning in my chest subsided.

 

 

[Kristianna 0]

Wow, I think I spent most of my last two years in college throwing up every morning. Especially my senior year... wow. By that time I was pledge-mistress of my sorority house, so I could usually push someone else around into cleaning up after me. I look back and think about that, and its still funny.

[Guest Tzar Lysergic]

I have myself a nice refreshing puke every six months or so. I never get sick, though.

[PILLS! PILLS! PILLS! 0]

I estimated projectile vomiting TWENTY-FIVE TIMES in a three hour bout with food poisoning

 

That's exactly how I spent my Christmas in 1995, and no I'm not joking. Puking sucks, so I make it a point not to fuck around and go over the edge. The last time that I can recall vomiting from substance abuse, four years ago or so. It was Ambien and Southern Comfort. I remember nothing, but I have a good fifteen pages or so of the most incoherent, partially-legible journal entry fun ever. So, nobody ever do that.

[Copper Feel 0]

I apparently have virtually no tolerance for overly sugary food whatsoever, I can't eat a box of donuts without throwing up.

[Guest Jesus Freaks on Coke]

You're not supposed to eat the whole damn box at once. Like one a day at the most. I go months between donuts. They're a bad idea by the time one has been completed.

[Copper Feel 0]

Even so, one box of donuts really shouldn't cause a person to vomit. Oh well, it isn't as if I actually enjoy the taste of donuts enough to justify eating them again anyway.

[Retard Girl 0]

....you keep track of the last time you puked?

[BruteSquad_BRODY 0]

17 years?? Who are you Jerry Seinfeld?

[bob_barron 0]

I haven't puked since September 2001. Before that it was summer of 1997.

 

I pride myself on my vomit streak. I know the day I eventually vomit will be awful. Not because of the vomiting, but b/c the streak itself will be over.

 

I burp vomit a lot though

[Dandy 0]

I can't remember the last time I puked. I know it has been years, and it had been a long time before that instance. I just don't puke a lot.

[Guest Jesus Freaks on Coke]

I haven't puked since September 2001.

[Guest Smues]

I had my first non alcohol related vomit in 8 years earlier this year, and of course it happened the night before I had a plane to catch for an out of town job, so not only was I sick but I didn't get any sleep. Vomiting is pretty awful, but at least when it's caused by alcohol you get the benefit of it usually preventing a hang over the next morning.

[luke-o 0]

Man, I puked on a bus a couple of weeks ago. And a couple of times the night before.

 

Apperantly, red wine doesn't agree with me.

[Copper Feel 0]

Now that I come to consider it, my only vomit-inducing alcohol related experience was also suffered at the hands of red wine.

[Sideburnious 0]

I'm pretty sure I've vomited more through illness than alcohol in the last few years. In fact I'm pretty sure I can count the amount of times I've gotten sick due to alcohol on one hand.

[BUTT 0]

I got terribly sick a couple of years ago, likely due to some sort of food poisoning. I was just lying a bed about to go to sleep, and then I started to feel a little sick, then it was like "FUCK I'M GONNA PUKE" and then BLAHHHHHHHHHH. Vomit all over my bedroom floor. I spent the next few days doing nothing but sleeping, puking and shitting. It was non-stop diarrhea, the kind where your stomach doesn't really feel the urge to shit but you sit on that toilet and just let it go and you don't stop, just keep on releasing that disgusting putrid liquid feces as long as you can and you never reach the point of feeling satisfied. I could have released the entire contents of my intestines that weekend. It was undoubtedly the worst I had ever felt. But by the end of the week, I was 12 pounds lighter. Go Kreese!

[Copper Feel 0]

I'm going to present that as an advisable course of dieting to all of my overweight friends.

[Bored 0]

I haven't puked in 11 years and only once in the last 19 years. Last time was due to pain killers after having my wisdom teeth removed and not eating anything all day. I'm thin as a rail so I'm deathly afraid of getting a stomach virus as I don't need any illness where I can't eat.

[CanadianGuitarist 0]

I think Puking Guy is enough of a meme to warrant a Smarkipedia entry, but it has to be noted that the guy was wearing a Hartford Whalers shirt.

 

 

 

For how often I drink, I throw up pretty rarely, at least by proportion. When my buddy was dating an ex that I hated, I was drunk for our first four outings. I threw up each time. I like that coincidence; she did not.

[Guest Vitamin X]

Just drink water or some sort of sugary water drink and you'll be fine. Especially when drinking.

 

SOME fruit juices work, although only sometimes. I don't throw up from non-alcohol related instances much and even then it's been a little while since I've thrown up from alcohol as well. Bad idea? Binge drinking after just recovering from a day or so of food poisoning. Totally ruined the first half of my trip to California last summer.

[At Home 0]

I had several slices of roundtable pepperoni pizza today, then spent a good 3 minutes on the shitter firing it back out again.

[Jingus 0]

I've bled to death once

 

. . .

 

 

How did that work?

still wondering about this little detail

[Maztinho 0]

I got terribly sick a couple of years ago, likely due to some sort of food poisoning. I was just lying a bed about to go to sleep, and then I started to feel a little sick, then it was like "FUCK I'M GONNA PUKE" and then BLAHHHHHHHHHH. Vomit all over my bedroom floor. I spent the next few days doing nothing but sleeping, puking and shitting. It was non-stop diarrhea, the kind where your stomach doesn't really feel the urge to shit but you sit on that toilet and just let it go and you don't stop, just keep on releasing that disgusting putrid liquid feces as long as you can and you never reach the point of feeling satisfied. I could have released the entire contents of my intestines that weekend. It was undoubtedly the worst I had ever felt. But by the end of the week, I was 12 pounds lighter. Go Kreese!

 

I had that once.

 

Turned out my appendix had burst and my body was trying to clear out the toxins from my body. Although since I'd just been drinking water to keep from dehydrating my stomach never hurt and I even got to the point where I felt good enough to go into work again, when a co-worker took one look at me and took me to the ER where they observed me for two days then figured out after giving me solid food and the stomach pain kicking in that it was in fact my appendix that burst.

 

I dropped 35 pounds in two weeks.

[MFer 0]

I haven't puked in 11 years and only once in the last 19 years. Last time was due to pain killers after having my wisdom teeth removed and not eating anything all day. I'm thin as a rail so I'm deathly afraid of getting a stomach virus as I don't need any illness where I can't eat.

This and a couple drinking episodes are the only times I've puked in the last 5 years.