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Maztinho

Things that Amuse or Please You

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A new Eminem CD

 

 

Mark Hoppus telling me one-on-one on AIM that Blink 182 will indeed be touring this summer

 

I don't know if anyone told you this, but it's not 1999 anymore.

 

 

My MSN contact said Blink died.

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I had my interview with the Chicago Cubs yesterday. I got to go into the Cubs clubhouse first, where about seven supervisors were just hanging out watching TV, then they had me fill out some more paperwork, before two of them took me into the Cubs weight room and interviewed me. At the end of the interview, they said they had to step out and confer, but then they told me they still had a lot of applications to get through, but if I don't hear anything by Friday, to call this number, and they handed me a card. I think it actually went pretty well.

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Two things:

 

1. A couple vending machines, one dispensing soda and other drinks/juice, and another dispensing candy and chips were installed in my apartment building a week or two ago. Lucky for me, they're like a few steps from my front door, too.

2. Tonight I was going to get some really overpriced Twix from the candy one when I noticed that the drinks one had a lot of drinks that were stuck between dispensed and in their slots. I pounded the glass to see if I could score a free one, but nothing happened. I really wanted one of the Propels in there that was stuck, so I actually grabbed the machine and shook it fairly hard and I hit the fucking jackpot. I scored not only the Propel I was going for, but another one that was a different flavor, 4 dr. peppers (on regular, one diet, two diet cherry which is my favorite dr. pepper), 2 chocolate milks, and 2 cokes (one diet, one cherry). I remember a lot of people complaining that the machine got stuck fairly often and thus getting ripped off, but I think it's a fair trade-off if it's that easy to collect drinks on it.

 

The vendor will probably be pissed, though.

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There was a vending machine in high school that everyone could "Fonzie" and get a random soda from, you just had to hit it on the side with a solid hipcheck. This of course was ruined with the one of the skaters running full on and attempting some sort of dropkick to the machine and breaking the side and them installing a new dispenser without the flaw of the old one.

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The other day, while I was working at Wal-Mart, a customer came up to me. He was foreign, but I wasn't sure exactly from where. Anyway, he asks me where he might be able to find the CAVIAR.

 

Totally serious.

 

This guy came to WAL-MART looking for CAVIAR.

 

He somehow interpreted the look of utter confusion on my face to mean "I don't know what caviar is", and not, what I intended it to mean, "Why the fucking hell do you think you could find CAVIAR in WAL-MART???"

 

I couldn't really be mad though, it was just too goddamned funny. I went through the whole "well, if we have it, it's over here routine, but look, it's not here, SURPRISE" because I probably woulda gotten in trouble if I told him that he was an idiot for looking for caviar at a FUCKING WAL-MART.

 

I'm really curious where he was from now; they must not have Wal-Marts or something.

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Man, the Sam's Club pop machine at the pre-"Super" Wal-Mart was awesome. Put in $.25, hold down the button, and the cans just kept on coming. My friends and I would get two for each person, then take a couple of them back to customer service for refunds.

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