Mr. S£im Citrus

To the best of my knowledge, the SCW (Smartmarks Championship Wrestling) is not a real promotion.

Well, you could always have him go to the ring wearing SCW t-shirts...

I'm sure they were all waiting with baited breath, Toxxic... :: exhales baited breath ::

:: adjusts tone :: IS THAT BETTER?

Yeah, if only Munich were around... Oh, wait...

Well, you should have read the newsletter...

Hey, I'm all about helping get you guys and your storylines over... at least, until I make my return... then, I'm going to be all about helping get me over...

Did you just send a "love note" to ten pounds of gold? Wait until they find out what happened to your cell phone...

OOPS! I knew I was supposed to go back and change something!

Eh... :: shrug :: But, have you been writing longer than me? Howboutdat?

SWF Smarkdown HOLT report July 26, 2004 Portland, Maine at Cumberland County Civic Center Report by Ed Burrows of Portland, ME, Smartmarks.com reader Dark Matches: - Lobo pinned Ebony with an avalanche splash at 3:57, after Candace tripped her from outside the ring. - SWF Tag Team Champions 42nd Street beat Déjà Vu at 8:09 in a non-title match, after hitting the Party Crasher on one of the twins (I can never tell which). - Dace Night beat SWF Hardcore Champion Martin Hunt in 7:12 by submission with the Torture Crab in a non-title match. Afterwards, he cut a promo about how he was going to rid the SWF of the monster known as Janus, and that he’d better enjoy his ‘swan song’ at Ground Zero, because after that, he was going to have to duel with the White Night! - Ryan Dustin pinned John Duran in 4:04 with the Real Deal, after countering a spear attempt with the Done Deal. - Austin Sly pinned CIA in 5:37 with the Sky Surfer. CIA hit him with the Via Rail and probably had him beat, but NTD distracted the referee long enough for Sly to get his second wind, and Sly snuck up behind CIA with a nut shot, followed by a DDT before hitting his finisher. - Judge Mental beat Petey the Irish Penguin by submission in 6:20 via Held Without Bail. Afterwards, he got on the microphone and announced that he had accepted Toxxic’s offer to mentor Spike Jenkins and Sean Davis. He spoke about how honored he felt to serve as a role model to aspiring young wrestlers, as all three members of Revolution Zero came down to the ring, and told Toxxic that he would make his two young charges into men that he could be proud of. Toxxic shook hands with Judge, raising his hand in victory, only to turn him around and surprise him with the Straight Edge! He ordered Spike and Sean to bring a table into the ring, and then had them powerbomb him through it! He then had them hold him up while he got on the ring and mocked Judge for his earlier speech. He said that the offer he made to Judge was never a real one, only a joke, and the fact that Hearford thought someone like him would want a washed-up old man as a mentor makes it that much funnier. He then hit Judge with a Caffeine Bomb onto a steel chair, and then spit on him as he and the rest of Revolution Zero walked out, leaving Hearford to be carried out of the ring on a stretcher. - SWF ICTV Champion Johnny Dangerous fought Danny Williams to a fifteen-minute time-limit draw in a non-title match. Deathwish had Johnny trapped in the Buffalo Sleeper, but the Barracuda refused to give up, holding on for over a minute until the time limit expired. Afterwards, Williams praised Johnny on his progress, claiming that he’d made significant improvements as a wrestler since he first came to the SWF, and that he had become someone who did the history of the ICTV Title proud. Smarkdown: - Flesher stopped at the head of the ramp and ordered one of the technicians to bring him a microphone. He said that, while it was always good to have more gold to put on the résumé, the only title that he was really interested in was the World Heavyweight Championship. He did claim to take some satisfaction in the his ability to dominate at every weight class, and even took the time to take a quick jab at Toxxic, saying that what he just did to Spike was only a small taste of what he planned to do to Toxxic at Ground Zero. - 42nd Street ran down to the ring to try and get the drop on Birdman and Drea, but they saw them coming, and kept them from getting into the ring. Cortez and the Masked Man stood their ground for a few minutes, eventually walking back up the ramp without a fight, but not without taking a few verbal jabs at the challengers, who stood defiantly in the center of the ring, pantomiming the Tag Team Titles around their waists. - After the handicapped match, they had a brief intermission. Rob Gilbert came down to the ring with the t-shirt gun, and shot a few into the crowd as part of the ‘Countdown to Genesis’ giveaway. Some guy on the other side of the arena got picked for the Grand Prize drawing. - Maddix got on the microphone during the commercial break and dared Johnny Dangerous to come back out. He challenged him to come into the ring and meet him face-to-face, rather than like a thief in the night. Johnny came back out and started towards the ring, but a bunch of officials came down to separate the two. - After the show went off the air, Toxxic and Tom Flesher took their fight out into the crowd, and the Wayward Sons chased the other two members of Revolution Zero back to the dressing room, leaving Janus alone in the ring with Dace. The two traded bombs for a few minutes before Janus took control, but when he whipped Dace to the ropes, Horrorcore came off with a flying lariat that knocked him silly, and then knocked him over the top rope with a running shot from the Equalizer! Janus retreated back to the back while Dace stood in the ring, holding the Equalizer over his head. Biggest Pops 1) Dace Night 2) Andrea Montgomery & Birdman 3) Wayward Sons 4) Johnny Dangerous 5) Vladimir Everheart Most Heat 1) Toxxic 2) Janus 3) Landon Maddix 4) Max King 5) Sean Davis

God damn it, stop lurking and come back! .... Irony is really ironic sometimes...

That was a decent show, Thoth. Who was supposed to be the interview that you couldn't schedule?

This is the part of your soliloquy that keeps tripping me up: If you don't do it intentionally, then what exactly do you do it for? Perhaps not "justify," but you certainly seem to be looking for an affirmation of some kind; I haven't been to chat in a long time, but you've been posting many of the same type of things on the boards in recent weeks as what I read in that transcript.

And that wouldn't start to get... you know... boring?

After reading that whole thing, I have only three comments: 1- Zed is a drop-out? No offense, Zed, but I didn't think you were even old enough to drop out of something; I had you figured for not much older than Grappler. 2 - You kids spend entirely too much time in that fucking chatroom... and, 3 - HOORAY SANDWICHES~!

Forty hours? Is that it? Pffft! You civilians have it sooo easy...

That's not really what I meant; in most cases, a woman who could press 200 pounds would be considered "strong." A woman who was "really strong" would probably be able to push 350. There aren't many men that can only push 350 who would be referred to as "really strong." And a professional wrestler who could only push 200 would be considered below average. That's basically what I'm saying; Chyna can probably push around 350 which, using our "sliding scale," would probably work out to a strength rating of about 4. The only difference is that a strength rating of 4 is not as conspicuous for a male character as it is for a female character. The main reason why I would consider a differing scale is for the lower strength levels, say, three and below, and my thinking is that 3 is generally accepted as "average" for middleweights and such (say, 230-250). Or a man who works out very little. But "average" for men isn't the same as "average" for women, and a 120 pound woman of "average" strength would not be able to lift the same as a 220 pound man who was also of "average" strength, but our system implies that a 3 is a 3 across the board. That really only applies to the lower levels, though (3 and below, as previously mentioned). At the point in which a character has a strength rating as high as 5, which Annie has, the difference begins to cease to be relevant. I always presumed that Annie was equal in strength to, say, Jay Dawg, but Annie was not supposed to be considered to have "normal" strength, anyway.

And, before anyone's tempted to turn some of the comments into a flame war, I would like to ask you to please don't; I made an error in judgment, with regards to Toxxic's character, I apologized for it, and I presumed that the apology was accepted. Whatever else was said by third parties, I would like to ask you to please squash it, and not take it personally. - Dub "now, let's all hold hands and sing Kumbayah" Cee

Technically, Zed, it's been relevant to the storylines twice... but, to be fair, both of the storylines were mine...

No, a strength quotient of "1" would be about equivalent to Michael Cole. A strength quotient of "2" means that you can lift your own body weight, but very little more than that. It's completely common for cruiserweight characters, such as my own, to have a strength quotient of "2," and the template even says so. Personally, I don't think that female characters and male characters should have the same strength values. Take Chyna, for example: against other Divas, Chyna might as well be Kane, but if she were actually wrestling against Kane, she might as well be X-pac. It's just my opinion, but I don't think that a "5" for women should be the same as a "5," for men, but that could just be me being chauvinistic. Besides which, you only get twenty points total, and I'd much rather have max speed than sacrifice either speed or durability for a little more strength. I tried having a strength value of "3" and a vitality value of "2" before, but I found that it was actually quite handicapping to have to write.

Fair enough. As I said, though, it's not like Judge would have been interfering on Toxxic's behalf, anyway, as my intent for his association with R-0 was him to work almost exclusively with Davis and Jenkins. You don't want Toxxic to respect anyone, and that's your business; he's your character, and you have the right to not have your character misrepresented. I'll remember next time. - Dub Cee

Toxxic, - When you sent me a PM authorizing me to use Jet in dark matches, it contained the following: "Unlike her boyfriend, she'll cheat, but he won't cheat for her." Forgive me for making what you may interpret as a logical reach, but I took that to mean that, while Toxxic may not cheat himself, he will implicitly condone it from his "lessers." - I fail to see how Toxxic being straight-edge would have any bearing on any relationship that he might have with Judge William Hearford. Or his being British, for that matter. - How was I to know that the Toxxic character would consider Judge to be "washed up?" I was looking at it from the same perspective as the way Triple H basically gave Flair a handout when he formed Evolution. After all, at some point in their lives, even people who don't respect anybody looked up to somebody. At any rate, it was a misunderstanding. Sorry for taking too many liberties with your character. - Dub Cee

Hey, if Annie can be stronger than men bigger than her, why not Candace? She's stronger than WC, too, but seeing as how he outweighs her by almost a hundred pounds, and he relies more on momentum than strength, anyway, I know I'm not worried about it... pending my eventual comeback, of course...

I'm disappointed that you don't appreciate the concept behind this, but I'll respect your choice, and will not include it in the future. For the record, this was the concept: I had gotten the inspiration to do a "negative push" with Judge, wherein he received a lot of attention by going on a surprising losing streak. Toxxic, a much higher profile wrestler at this point in his career, more or less volunteers himself to team with Judge Mental, because he used to admire him, or something (who knows?), and leads him to his first victory in months. He then offers him the chance to salvage his career by becoming Toxxic's lackey. I considered it to be generally understood that, even though Judge had been in a serious slump, that even the fast-rising Toxxic recognized that someone with the talent and wisdom of William Hearford could be instrumental in the development of his acolytes (Sean Davis and Spike Jenkins); in SWF continuity, most people recognize (and, in theory, most fans would as well) that even though he's no longer in his prime, Judge Mental is still a dangerous opponent and a skilled wrestler, and up-and-coming wrestlers like Davis and Jenkins could prosper under his guidance. Besides which, it's not like I had ever intended for Judge to be directly associated with Toxxic himself, or that this mini-story would even leave the confines of the HOLT, unless you wished; my intent was to kind of put Judge into a role similar to that which Arn Anderson occupied in the latter-day Four Horseman, where his primary duty was as a mentor to the junior Horsemen. I figured that, in the long run, it would be good for Judge's character, and couldn't possibly hurt R-0. But, like I said, if you don't like it, it won't go any further. - Dub "shrug" Cee