NYU

The six combatants in the Round Robin Tournament have been signed - and they may not necessarily be who you would think. Anyway, to cut it short.....those SIX MEN ARE.... .......going to be announced on Thursday night. SWERVE~!~!

Whoa. How the hell did you come up with that number? There's no way Bush is going to win New York. Hopefully, you just made an incredibly inaccurate typo here.

At least you stuck to your morals.

DREK STONE..... ......will continue to be confused with what exactly is going on this week! Must See TV, folks.

The Saviors of the WWE Folder strike again! This has always been one of my favorite WWE-related threads. Trish as a 50-year-old black woman is ingenious, and some of the ideas in that thread were just awesome! Even though it did get a little off-topic at the end with that oh-so-thrilling "serious discussion".... If it weren't for the brilliant contributions of RRR, Czech, Zsasz, FrigidSoul (R.I.P.) and myself....I shudder to think what the WWE Folder would be like today.

Good call man, good call. I tried to save this but to no avail. What do you say the good OAO posters all go in exile at Graphics & Testing Grounds where we can get away with more. .....great idea. Next week. Monday, September 6th, 2004. The One and Only Unofficial Raw Thread - for the first time EVER - in the Graphics & Testing Grounds. Let them have their fun in the WWE folder. We'll show them how to do a REAL Raw thread. I'm really serious. This should SO happen....

This sure was one successful, unhumorous OAO Raw thread. From this point, I think I'm protesting the Raw threads after the bullshit that has occured today. As for Raw: solid, but majorly uneventful. And The Kane segment with The Hardy Family wasted SO, SO much potential.

.....and that's about it, folks. Either follow the dress code, or be prepared to be fined like a government mule! Very good plan, Mr. Ross. Have a nice day. JR leaves the room... Dress code?! This is ridiculous! Excuse me Tajiri, but on our fine WWE programming, you hardly speak any English. To speak perfectly fine here just wouldn't be sensible. Vince wouldn't like that. Ress crode?! Ris is ridicurous! Better. Wearing a suit and tie is just the perfect decision to really make this company look better in the media eye. Look....we're getting more public attention already. Burt: "No, no. No attention. Just here to watch the show!" Bob: "Say Randy, an oddly unbent baseball cap would be the perfect thing to spruce up that suit...."

Randy, I think I'm in some serious trouble. Now, hold on. Calm down and tell me what the trouble is. No reason to go all quacky-wacky on me. I have a problem. I have a hot drink... .....but no ice for it. No ice? Good god, this must be the work of.... KJ BRACKISH! LOLZ~! Dam straight, muddafuckers~! I gots all the ice, so...if you want ICE.....I GOTS ICE, MOTHAFUCKA~! BUT IT'S ALL 4 ME~! w00t! w00t! Oh, heavens no! To be continued...

This makes me so mad! Perhaps, for once in my life, it's time to leave behind the sensibility and become Reckless Randy Orton - a force to be reckoned with, no doubt! Yes folks, it's time. ...... Now, where's my pen and paper? I have a TSM petition to prepare! Ah yes, in my top, right dresser drawer, like they always are! The first step of being reckless is to be sensibly prepared!

Oh, this sucks. I saw the Czech Republic OAO Raw Thread this morning, and spent the entire hour in my Modern American Civilization class thinking of ways I can improve upon the "Sensible Randy Orton" saga. I then come back from my class and see that the thread has been closed. What an absolute travesty! I don't know if I've ever seen a better, more creative thread in the WWE Folder - and it gets locked?! This board gets more humorless by the day....

SURVIVE OR SURRENDER OAOAST CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Crystal vs. Zack Malibu © WINNER: It's finally time for Crystal to win The Big One, which might set Zack off the edge in the next few weeks. TLC TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Black T vs. GPX vs. NNMX © WINNERS: Looking for Black T to win back the Tag Titles BARBED WIRE PERGATORY Sly Sommers vs. Calvin Szechstein WINNER: Sly Sommers. Calvin has just pulled so much sadistic stuff on Sly in the past month that it's time for Sly to get his revenge. TEN THOUSAND DOLLAR FOUR WAY TAG CHALLENGE MATCH (The winner gets Ten grand.) Bryants vs. The Tethers vs. Frankensteiners vs. Skull Kid & Skull Mask WINNERS: The Bryants. They've already quickly become a respectable force in the Tag Division. 24/7 TITLE MATCH Hoff © vs. Gunner WINNER: Hoff. He's the Emperor - he can do anything! ALMOST FAMOUS MATCH Chicks Over Dicks vs. The Saints WINNERS: Chicks over Dicks. I think we all deserve to know just what the hell a 'muse' is. CAGE MATCH Panther vs Chris Bryte WINNER: Panther. I don't know if anyone or anything would be able to stop him from killing Bryte here. X-TITLE MATCH Rick Edwards vs. J. Arthur Edwards WINNER: Rick Edwards. But that still doesn't necessarily mean he'll get 5 minutes with Father...some shady stuff might be going on here. Judas vs. Christopher Cain WINNER: Christopher Cain, so The Machine won't completely fail tonight. Drek Stone vs. Leon Rodez WINNER: OMG~! DREK IS AN ASSHOLE~! AND RODEZ JUST WANTS TO HAVE FUN~! WHAT WILL HAPPEN HERE~?! FEEL FREE TO ADD MORE "~" FOR EXTRA EMPHASIS~!~! The Mad Cappa vs. Stephen Joseph WINNER: The Mad Cappa. He just beat Drek Stone last month - the man is UNSTOPPABLE~!~!

Hell, Bradshaw's been bustin' his ass in WWE for eight years. RVD has yet to put together one--solid anyway. Not to get off-topic here, but: Just how the hell has Bradshaw busted his ass for 8 years? Up until the John Bradshaw Leyfield character created in April, the guy has pretty much done jack shit in his matches. Whether it be when he was a member of the New Blackjacks, the Acolytes, the A.P.A......just when the hell has he "busted his ass"? For eight years, it's always been the same garbage with Bradshaw's matches. Power moves galore, without any shred of psychology to them. Subpar brawling that could be seen in independent federations all over the country. And, in many of these matches, an overall lethargic attitude. During these EIGHT years before he became JBL, give me one memorable match he has had. One match - whether it be singles OR tag - where you could point to it and say "Now THAT proved this guy should be a Main-Eventer." The only time Bradshaw has shown any type of actual fire was when he was pushed on Raw in 2002 alongside Steve Austin and Ric Flair. And even then, his work was pure trash. To the point where WWE had to depush him, even against their high wishes to turn him into an actual somebody. By my count, he's had THREE good matches. All of which were against Eddie Guerrero. His match against the Undertaker at SummerSlam was blah. Not awful, but certainly not too good. Whether you like Rob Van Dam or hate him, I certainly think you could find more than THREE good matches in the last eight years of his career. Both Bradshaw and RVD have gone against the same caliber of opponents in WWE - from Chris Benoit to Chris Jericho to Eddie Guerrero to The Undertaker to everyone in between. And I certainly find the RVD matches with these guys to be more memorable - and just overall better - than the ones Bradshaw has had with them. Why is this even being argued?

Either way, you have to admire the fact that Chris Candido has stayed with her throughout the past few years.

That first post-honeymoon fight is going to be a bitch.... Kane: You're trying to kill me. Why now? Lita: Because two years ago, I slept eight hours. A year ago, it was twelve. Now, it's fifteen. Pretty soon, it's going to be twenty-four. Kane: What are you trying to do? Scare me? Lita: I need a life. Kane: GET A JOB! Lita : I don't want a job. I want you. Kane : I'm taken, by me. Get out of the house, do something useful, Goddammit. Lita: You wouldn't let me work when I wanted to. Kane: That was a year ago. Lita: You throw a tantrum every time I'm not home. Kane: Look, sister. I'm out there in the jungle. Eight hours a day. Lita: You wouldn't even let me canvas for Kennedy! Kane: YOU WANT A JOB?! I got a job for you. Fix up this pigsty! You get a pretty Goddammed good salary for testing out this bed all day! You want an extra fifty dollars a week, try vacuuming! You want an extra hundred, make this Goddammed bed! Try opening some Goddammed windows! That's why you can't stand up in here - THE GOD DAMN PLACE SMELLS LIKE A CLOSET!

HHH: Make a choice, Orton. MAKE A CHOICE! JR: WHAT'S ORTON GONNA DO, BAH GAWD?! *The lights slowly turn out* I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love Love's going to leave me I'm too sexy for my shirt too sexy for my shirt So sexy it hurts And I'm too sexy for Milan too sexy for Milan New York and Japan And I'm too sexy for your party Too sexy for your party No way I'm disco dancing I'm a model you know what I mean And I do my little turn on the catwalk Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah I do my little turn on the catwalk I'm too sexy for my car too sexy for my car Too sexy by far And I'm too sexy for my hat Too sexy for my hat what do you think about that I'm a model you know what I mean And I do my little turn on the catwalk Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah I shake my little touche on the catwalk I'm too sexy for my too sexy for my too sexy for my 'Cos I'm a model you know what I mean And I do my little turn on the catwalk Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah I shake my little touche on the catwalk I'm too sexy for my cat too sexy for my cat Poor pussy poor pussy cat I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love Love's going to leave me And I'm too sexy for this song TSM: OHMYGOD!! DAT IZ DE PERFECT SONG!! *Splooge*

At least Vince knows he'll have the cellulite-fetish audience to give some decent Raw ratings tonight. I'm not feeling this Raw at all. This OAO Raw Thread was doomed to fail from the beginning....

Batista's so lucky. He had his face in Orton's wang, not once....but twice! I think TSM just had a collective orgasm.

*GASP* RANDY ORTON!! EASY THERE, BIG FELLA!!

We need the Planet of the Apes monkeys to bring out pies. Just to - you know - completely raise the shittiness of this segment.

The posters here on TSM are such traitors, it's disgusting. Last week, it was the chiseled abs of Randy Orton! This week, it's the ripped body of The Rock! So fickle....

OAOAST NO FEEDBACK! Coming to you in September....

Drek Stone vs. Leon Rodez

He had his chance? Like in 2001, when he was REALLY getting hot - and they just cut him off at the knees? Or, in September 2002, when his popularity was surging once again.....when he was actually next-in-line to become the World Heavyweight Champion - and they blocked him yet again? Van Dam has NEVER had a fair chance to succeed in WWE. Every time he came close, they always found a reason to stop him. He at least deserves a fair chance. One that he hasn't gotten yet, mind you.

That's terrible news! Fire Art Howe!