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King Cucaracha

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~Nice, simple promo by Card to start off the show. Short and effective, and I like where he's going with this character.

 

~Double no-show! Awesome! But TNT, come on, everyone knows it's Kombat.

 

~Okay, Toxxic HAS to be rookie of the year or something. It's amazing to see how far he's come in just, what, four months? ...dude, Super Soaker? Now THAT'S how you win a hardcore match. That's up there with 'stuff urinal cake in Ash's mouth' in terms of ideas. *MUTHAFUCKING “CHING”, BITCH!!*? and "Testicles are your friends"? Okay, again with the awesome. The Silent chants were a nice touch.I really like your writing style, Toxxic. You don't just describe the action, you go through the thought process of the participants to explain exactly why they're doing what they're doing. Dangerlust off the LADDER? Egads! Great finish.

 

~LANDON! The man they call Landon! Clark is playing the mindgames, but Landon no-sells them and KNOCKS JAMES OUT! MOMMA SAID KNOCK JAMES OUT! He may be Edward James, bitch, but he's not Landon Maddix!

 

~Speaking of improvement, Zodd Cortebu, you're only getting better. This is really solid for a heel/tweener match, with Duran getting the leg worked over in great fashion, but still falling back on his power to gain an advantage. Ref bump? Eh, I'm not really a big fan of them, but at least it puts over Duran's desperation in doing so. Poor Funyon; first he gets heckled in Toxxic/IL and now he gets harassed by Duran. Can the guy ever get a break? Nice finish sequence, too. Normally, flash pins seem kinda weak, but it works in this case; it'd be tough to think of another way for a lightweight tweener upstart to beat a heavyweight heel veteran, so the small package is a good idea.

 

~Triple threat time! Nice sequence to start, with both heels focusing on Johnny. I like MVS using The Answer on Johnny; nice touch. German Suplex from the RING to the FLOOR? Holy shit! That's a huge spot to put so early in the match. And again with the big bumps! Jesus, Mike falls from the turnbuckle to the floor right on his head? That should've killed him! Wait...he gets RIGHT back up? Umm...is Mike human (no, he's God, but that's beside the point)? Instead of going for the head, Ace works over the leg, which is questionable. Johnny's back after a long pause, big spots galore...and he finishes with an ARMBAR? Mike had his HEAD and his LEGS worked over and Johnny uses an armbar? That's...well, that's bizarre. This match was all over the place.

 

~Munich's back! Nice bit at the beginning as Riley summarizes his career for us newbies. Hilarious bit at the start of the match with Blazenwing's 'knowledge of the female anatomy' bit. Pretty quick start to the match, with some big moves being hit right out of the gate. Working with someone like Blazenwing's moveset is difficult (don't get me started on that, though), but this is a really solid effort. They're on the outside for quite a while, though, and the ref isn't counting! Minor thing, of course. The whip into the steps and the proceeding bump is a nice visual, though. Okay, there's a few break-the-count spots, but it still seems like a lot of time outside of the ring. And, whoa, that was a surprise finish. Really out of nowhere. It looks like you have a bit of ring rust, but this was a fun little match.

 

~It's Britney Spears and she's feeling Toxxic! Nice promo with reprecussions from the Dangerlust...no, nevermind. Man, I love this character so much. And the main event is made for Smarkdown. Nice promo.

 

~The Masked Man? Who the fuck is this guy and why should I care?

 

~Oooh, UWF-i! Like I told Tom earlier, I love the idea for this little pre-match promo. I figure "Rules? Boooooooooooring~" but he makes it EXCITING by showing examples from past matches. Now that's good stuff.

 

~BEST OF FIVE TIME, BABY! The first 2-point segment is a nice exchange, with Tom outsmarting Dace. The Ego Buster spot is a bit confusing though, because Dace isn't even off the ground and Tom "sets him back on his feet". I think it's just a wording issue, though. Dace gets some 'lucky' points and Flesher outsmarts Dace again, which is very cool. CEMENT SERIES! Flesher gets 5 points for an awesome combination. A nice little submission sequence next, which Dace segues into a suplex and another three points. I'm really digging this match so far. Flesher gains more points more on technical skill now, which is smart because he can't outsmart Dace forever. Nice little dramatic spot with the KO-tease, too. WHOA! That's an awesome finish to the match, out of nowhere, but it worked great with Tom's mindet and character. It must've been tough working with a match like this for the first time, but you ran with it. Match of the night. Oh, and Tom, post your match, please.

 

~MAK! MAK! MAK FUCKING FRANCIS! I've missed the Franchise SO much, man. And he's on hype duty for Clark/Maddix! Sweet promo! I can't wait for this match! Now we want Mak back and we want him wrestling!

 

~Main event time! Nice little opening exchange between Janny and Danus - gives us a good taste of what's to come at 13th Hour. And now we're seeing Landon vs. Clark! Nice way to set up both matches for the PPV by doing this. Only problem I see now is that Clark just took a Rage F'n Unleashed on Storm, and he's bouncing around like nothing's wrong. There's the brief mention of the move in the match, but he doesn't seem to be selling it. If Janus is selling the leg, I think Clark should be selling the neck. Low blow with "Ching" sound effect? I believe you've just saved the match! Good to see Clark's neck is finally worked over as Janus comes in. Seventh Inning Stretch! Nice nod to Grand Slam by Maddix. You know, if those chants for Alan were reversed, you'd get something not fit for television. Just thought I'd point that out. HOT TAG AND HEEEEEEERE'S THE ACTION! DANNY! JANUS! WHO WILL PREVAIL?! The ending sequence is pretty good, the double submission is a nice touch. Although, Janus getting pwn3ed by Clark in the last minutes doesn't look too good when he's going into the main event. Good match, though.

 

Whew! I give Dace a ton of credit for doing this every show. Nice job, everyone. Let's keep the ball rolling up through 13th Hour!

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My fault on the selling of the Rage. I wasn't trying to NO SELL it, but i wasn't trying to make Clark look like the recent Eddy Guerrero. Don't ask me what i was thinking, really.

 

I mean...both me and Maddix are about to go into an Iron Man, where resilency is the key, and I was trying to give Clark at least a HINT of that, I mean... Clark got fucked royally by Thugg and was back in 10 days feeling it a little, but working through it.

 

So to Janus I apoligize. I didn't have a clear understanding of exactly what i needed to do, so I just kinda rolled with the neck pain.

 

 

Oh...and that double no-show was severely lacking in TOASTY~!

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The ending sequence is pretty good, the double submission is a nice touch. Although, Janus getting pwn3ed by Clark in the last minutes doesn't look too good when he's going into the main event. Good match, though.

I don't think Clark attacking Janus's injured leg from behind hurts the Hell Machine's credibility. It makes it look like Clark needed an injury in addition to the element of surprise to get the best of Janus. He also won every fair exchange he had with me, the Champion.

 

edit: Truth be told I probably could have gone out of my way to make Janus look stronger but I had my heart set on the double submission finish.

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Right, Comments time from me:

 

Opening promo: The man is back in town. With a promo dealing with a few real life things like getting in shape and all that. Nice little hype number and we can all only wait until Chris Card is back in action full time.

 

Bah at opening double no show.

 

Hardcore goodness: We still have this twisted thread between IL, Crow and Jessica running, where shall this one lead to I wonder. And IL wastes no time going for the toys because he's a nutting bastard. I mark for the Macho Man joke as Toxxic goes for the bug guns as well. But a waterpistol.... god damn WWE comedy hardcore! All the weapons in the pocket are in interesting idea for Toxxic, but it ignores the fact it would REALLY hurt for him to bump while carrying loads of crap. Toxxic is just kicking the crap out of IL, man he's becoming worrying strong in a hardcore sitution when he's hardly though at all. Even with the hardcore shots though, going straight to close counts sort of kills the build up to the final fall at times. Rickmen gets a breif advantage only to get caught by the Brass Knux again. IL barely fights back before trying to get some wood. Slightly overkill on the finish and all. It was pretty much Toxxic squashing IL. Decent idea as well done, but damn it Toxxic is still getting the Randy Orton push, he's turning into Superman, almost.

 

Time for another promo: Alan Clark delievers a little message to Maddix via proxoy, only for Maddix to lose his temper and lash out...hmmm build.

 

Onto another match: They're still tossing Duran around this mid cards and it's producing interesting stuff I must say. It's slightly odd not having an opening bell FXed in to show the start of the match, but it makes it flow better somewhat. Todd and Duran start of playing games, just feeling each other out, across the styles gap between the two. Todd tries to out speed Duran but the more expereinced mathc just catches him out powers him around. But it's that speed that allows Todd to get out of dodge and onto the offence, even if he does stop stelling Duran's offence as soon as he does. Still, Todd keeps on using his speed to outpace Duran and block is offence as before. It's pretty decent, if a little dry at times, but again, Todd is making flash reversals without really selling anything Duran's dishing out. Playing off a few old Duran matches with the knee strike in the ring steps, nice touch there. Todd starts to work over Duran's right leg, though he's not selling anything himself. And with the chair stuff on the outside, Todd is still countering Duran's stuff without showing to much affect from it. End with a slide off and a small package. All right match, but there's almost no selling in it for some of the things that happen.

 

Triple Threat Time: Johnny's ego is running wild again from all those pops he's getting. Still, everyone manages to get into the ring nicely atleast. And shocking Ace and Mike gang up on Johnny. Dangerous almost fights off two men at once, but he's not Aecas and get gets floored. Seems the bad guys can work together for once in this one. Until Johnny takes a huge f'n' bump to the floor. Then Mike gets sent of the turnbuckle into the floor, head first...ermmm, that's break his neck Johnny. And then he's hardly phased by it, he's still fighting back as Ace goes outside to pick him up! then Ace doesn't even go for Mike's neck to work it over. Johnny's back up from break up the fall from the ACE, rather quickly for such a nasty bump. And then he's not even selling it! And all three guys just end up trading off moves and counters in the ring. Even after his bump, Johnny can still kick Mike's ass and nail him with a Dangerous Drop. And then he clamps on a Jujigatame for then win, rather than going for a leg bar on Mike's worked over leg. Spotty as hell there and some of the bumps where way to big and not even sold. Eh

 

Returee match time: And Crow isn't the only one trying to promote smoking to all the little SWF fans, tsk tsk. It's a rather odd start to things, and a slightly odd writing style as well. Again the problem of launching straight into close falls, sort of killing the build up to later things. And the really long brawl on the outside is odd, even with broken counts, it's still pushing it. An return at least, a little lacking on the description side and logic, but it was ok.

 

More promoness: Toxxic hyping up the match between himself and Kibagami on the PPV, and somehow not getting suspended, even after using the Dangerlust AGAIN. Still, it's good hype and we've got a sweet Six Man Tag Booked for the next show.

 

Endless Multiman action now: Gotta love the actions of TMM, works so well in huge cluster fucks like these matches. The comedy is probably the best thing here, but it's a great little number really, even for the match it is. The situation gets handelled really well adn the writing helps carry it off. Spotty madness but fun none the less. The false ending with brilliant and really put of Ryan Dustin. Great work on that one TMM.

 

Tom's brilliant promo to set up the UWF-I match, great work man, thanks for that.

 

My shocking win, and writing wise that's 2 wins against Tom, I'm surprised.

 

HUGE hype promo, once again from Alan Clark. Just insane, summing up so much history. I just hope it's the final blow off for these two guys.

 

And finally upto the main event: Two of the big matches for the 13th Hour collide in the main event and it's sure to be nasty. The line about Janus leaving the Trinity I assume was Rando's as Janus left and split the Trinity when Dace was running the show, but anyway. Janus pulls out an old weapon and uses the Big Boot to block the Rolling Eblow like so many people before him, clearly he's boning up on the champ before he takes him on for the World Title. For a man that took a Rage Unleashes on the last show, Clark is ok. Still, Clark capitalises on Danny's opening and shows he can still take it to Maddix straight on. Clark is almost doing on to completely out to Maddix and counter his every move. But a little underhand tactics that Maddix uses so well gets him back incontrol, even if it does make it look like the only way Maddix can fight, it's what Clark has been building to in promos. Still, Janus comes in and goes straight after Clark's neck, trying to take advantage of the Rage Unleashed from the last show. And a huge chokeslam takes Danny out, doing the classic spot of leaving the weaker parnter without anyone to tag to. After getting his ass kicked from pillar to post, it's only a lucky German Suplex that gives Alan even a hope. Danny tries Dace's MAD move of Powerbombing Janus only to get Gored. And Janus goes straight into the Hell Crush to work the ribs, for Clark to break it up in the nick of time. And then Clark gets taken out with a Crash Landon. A Double Submission combo finally ends Danny's usual huge race to the finish in another top form SWF Tag Main event. Good fun match and it sets up both the Iron Man and World Title match.

 

Hmmm, probably the first show in a while I haven't massively enjoyed reading that much, still had it good points though. Might just be my mood. Still people, we've got the stuff going into the PPV so let's keep it rolling!

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Dace, thanks for the comments... but why do you continue to blast everything I do week in and out? It is starting to become seriously annoying. The shots to MVS' head are there to weaken him, same thing for the leg spots. I did the armbar finish because it was YOU and Tom who suggested it as instant tap with no work to that body part.

 

By the time the end came; Mike took a ton of abuse to his head and leg, that was the entire point. He was physicially weakened and continuing was not an option. Also a release suplex out of the ring is not all that deadly... I have referances from matches. Like Y2J vs Christian WM20 which is where I stole that spot from if you don't think so.

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Ok Johnny, I didn't like your match. But I'm ONE sodding person. My opinion in this is hardly the most valid or correct. It my well be that what I think is a load of crap, oh well.

 

Yes, the sudden tap out was suggest by me and Flesher, but maybe we just misunderstood what you where looking for, or you carried it out in a way that we didnt expect. I just thought you where going to just clamp on a submission for a win without anything being built, but you had already used leg work on Mike so it didnt seem it fit.

But hell man, I've said you've done good stuff. I said once there was a lack of selling in your match, so you pick it up slowly, started to work on, starting working a build up to your tap out finishes and stuff. Maybe I'm not the biggest fan of your work, but you've taken my offten full of crap talk and tried to do better from it. You've been taking note of someone, who's opinion matters fuck all to you and trying to do something about it. Hey, fucking better than I've done.

 

I give me time to read everyones match and at least say a little bit about them every show. Maybe I'm always spaeking a load of crap, but I just speak about what I read, maybe I do miss things in people's matches but I do try. So you had a match, I didnt like, I dont know what everyone else thatn read it thought. It might just have been an off match, I will admit I havent had a truely good match to me in quite sometime, but hey.

 

If I was to harsh, at the end of the day, I'm some 18 year old kid on the other side of the ocean. Sorry for pissing you off, now that's all.

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And finally upto the main event: Two of the big matches for the 13th Hour collide in the main event and it's sure to be nasty. The line about Janus leaving the Trinity I assume was Rando's as Janus left and split the Trinity when Dace was running the show, but anyway.

 

No that's mine. Brainfart I suppose.

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I'd like to mention I thought the main event was a pretty good example of how to do pre-PPV build with more than two people, and I figured it was an above-average tag match on the whole. I enjoyed it, even if it wasn't incredible. Landon's match was alright, although I was surprised that he got anything in (Janus didn't think he would, being unable to write), but it felt rushed on the whole, and just didn't excite me in a lot of places. It was formulamatic, and even then, the formula wasn't applied as well as it could've been.

 

And Johnny, Dace has every right to say so if he thinks your matches aren't any good. We don't live surrounded by shiny happy people where every bit of effort is rewarded with a rousing chorus of 'good job!' and a gold star, so that way, all can be happy and free in a My Little Pony world of rainbows and cotton candy for everybody! Christ. He doesn't like your stuff -- deal with it. He's doing the gesture of pointing out why politely instead of screaming about how asinine it is to ignore neckwork and then further legwork you establish in a match to go for a shock finish that makes absolutely no sense. Sure, the armbar can work that way, provided you haven't built to fucking anything ELSE that would be more logical. Instead of complaining about the fact he's commenting, unlike just about anyone else, maybe you could use the oh-so harsh criticism for bettering any further matches? Just an idea.

 

Maybe you could not bitch about getting title shots you don't want and then winning them, too.

 

-Z

 

EDIT: Spelling, punctuation.

Edited by realitycheck

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To quote him more or less directly, i believe Jonny's exact comment was not that he didn't want the title shot (because he was angling for an ICTV shot at me which I was going to take him up on before I ended up gunning for Kibs and jobbing to Janus), but that he didn't think they MEANT anything since he won a USJL Title shot back in March (no-show vs Spike Jenkins, if I recall) and never got it. I'm not trying to argue with you Z, but I THINK that's what he actually meant. Even if he might have been a little grumpy in stating it.

 

Dace - I apologise for the WWE comedy hardcore, but since Toxxic isn't meant to actually LIKE hardcore I try and do weird things that still work rather than the same old lightube fests. And yeah, I did squash IL a bit - but then again if I'd been less than 99% sure he wouldn't show maybe I'd have tried to write a more balanced match. As it was I was virtually sure he wouldn't, so could afford to do a rush job and get myself some free time.

 

Sorry, IL. But you laughed after a chairshot, so I didn't bury you.

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Sly, if you sent me a match, I never got it.

I sent it to chirs3... like it said on the card to send it to. Where it went from there, I have no idea.

 

Not that it's that big of a deal I guess... it's not a spectacular match or even any more than a squash... but I just don't want another no show on my record.

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SS, if I were to come back, The_Mak would have to kill all competition and once again be the dominate force in the SWF barr-none... in other words stay the supreme JTTF. Internet cookie to whoever gets that one. Besides, it'd only give Zed a reason to say the Flyers are choke artists. But who's laughing now. I don't see many people watching the Tampa/Calagry cup series. The Flyers would have been big market ratings.

 

 

 

And on a wholly seperate note, I hate all of you equally.

 

M. "been hatin' ya'll since the '02" Francis

 

 

 

P.S. Somebodies clearly been watching CZW. Best respect the Joker Driver, bitches.

Edited by Above Average

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So to Janus I apoligize. I didn't have a clear understanding of exactly what i needed to do, so I just kinda rolled with the neck pain.

The Rage Unleashed is to Janus what the Demonstar Driver is to Kibagami, sans the awesome history the Demonstar has. You -shouldn't- be bouncing around like your neck is fine, you should be worried about keeping your head on straight. That's all, really.

 

I was specifically referring to this ongoing Dace/Janus/Zed vs. Johnny (and, occasionally me) rift...

 

Don't involve someone who hasn't said anything, thanks.

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I'll be polite. Z, my reply is in your PM box.

 

Toxxic, yes that was what I meant. Though I have no desire to regain the US belt, so I guess it doesn't matter.

 

Dace, thanks.

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Landon's match was alright, although I was surprised that he got anything in (Janus didn't think he would, being unable to write), but it felt rushed on the whole, and just didn't excite me in a lot of places. It was formulamatic, and even then, the formula wasn't applied as well as it could've been.

Lol...totally. I just wanted to show to be honest. But, yeah.

 

Sly, if you've still got your match I'd suggest you send it to someone ASAP and maybe they'll edit it in. That way you've proof of your showing and such.

 

Rando...I too was a little bothered about the lack of neck selling slightly. I totally understand why you did (build Alan's resiliance), but I felt the Rage should'a fucked up your neck, resiliance or not. Just my opinion though.

 

 

Ok...best leave before things get HOSTILE~ up in here again. :P

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Crap. Sorry about that Sly. For some reason, everytime I looked at that card I thought I was marking that match as well. Sorry for the confusion.

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Crap. Sorry about that Sly. For some reason, everytime I looked at that card I thought I was marking that match as well. Sorry for the confusion.

No worries man, mistakes happen.

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SS, if I were to come back, The_Mak would have to kill all competition and once again be the dominate force in the SWF barr-none... in other words stay the supreme JTTF. Internet cookie to whoever gets that one.

Jobber to the Flesher, clearly.

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