Best Wrestling Quotes...

[Special K 0]

I loved how heel Jericho would just assume he would be loved by the crowd, no matter what he said.

 

"That's because, Deano, you're just a loser, just like your POOR, DEAD, DADDYYYYY. Thank you!"

[Jericholic82 0]

Nash:  "You guys haven't seen Vinnie Vegas around anywhere, have you?"

When the heck was THAT?

It was on a Nitro (I want to say during Nash's run as commissioner in 2000). The Oz comment a few posts up reminded me of it.

 

Wish I could remember what date it was and who he said it to.

a little off topic, but do you remember during nashs run as commisoner he "went crazy" and thought he was batman or something?

[JoeDirt 0]

More Schiavone, from Havoc 98 when Bret beats Sting. He always made me laugh with his "anger".

 

"You know, I can understand taking advantage when the Stinger Spash misses and he hits the ring post, but to hit a man with a baseball bat three times and then come off the top rope and drive it into his throat...that's just inexcusable!"

[Lil' Bitch 0]

DDP while you're in the hospital screaming in pain, your wife will be on her back screaming my name!

 

-Scott Stiener at Superbrawl IX

 

[Hunter's Torn Quad 0]

"If I gotta go someplace where I can wrestle, then goddamnit you can all kiss my ass"

[JHawk 0]

Eric Bischoff, prior to a meeting with "WCW President" Ric Flair (paraphrased): I remember when Flair and Jim Ross were running this company. Running shows in front of 500 fans in a barn.

[Hunter's Torn Quad 0]

Eric Bischoff, prior to a meeting with "WCW President" Ric Flair (paraphrased): I remember when Flair and Jim Ross were running this company. Running shows in front of 500 fans in a barn.

What makes that funnier, is that at one point during Bischoff's run, in mid-93, SMW was outdrawing WCW in some places. Also, IIRC, it was also in Bischoff's run that they had to cancel a tv taping when the number of wrestlers and production crew outnumbered the fans.

[alfdogg 0]

Mr. Perfect, at Good Friends, Better Enemies

 

"Sunny, there is no question that you have the greatest pair...

 

...of tag team wrestlers that I have seen in a long time here in the World Wrestling Federation."

[Special K 0]

I would welcome any number of cactus Jack quotes. After 15 year of blood, sweat and tears it just isn't worth it anymore.

 

Vinny Macquotemachine: Don't kiss the booboo!

[JHawk 0]

During the 4/12/1980 Spectrum show, Dick Graham is interviewing a young heel Hulk Hogan. Hogan refuses to answer Graham's questions about life on the road for a man his size and basically puts himself over the entire interview, then says out of nowhere as Graham tries to wrap up the interview:

 

Hogan: My arms are almost as big as your head.

Graham: Thank you for that. We'll be right back.

[alfdogg 0]

"You think this is about...COFFEE???"

 

- Kane

[Epic Reine 0]

"Get ready to bow down and toss my salad!" - Konnan on the WCW Mayhem The Music CD right before his song plays.

[The Mandarin 0]

"Get ready to bow down and toss my salad!" - Konnan on the WCW Mayhem The Music CD right before his song plays.

WOAH.

[hbkhhhmark4life 0]

"Get ready to bow down and toss my salad!" - Konnan on the WCW Mayhem The Music CD right before his song plays.

WOAH.

"And peel my potatoes" also from the wcw mayhem cd ha ha ha

[JHawk 0]

Can't remember the show, but here's some vintage Jerry Lawler:

 

"I'm an animal lover, JR. I like puppies. I like chicks. I love beavers."

[Epic Reine 0]

I just remembered a great one, during Austin's heel turn before he joined the Alliance, he and Angle started teaming up. Angle was getting ready for a match and was doing stretches right in front of Austin face.

 

Austin: "Get your ass outta my face!"

 

Austin's facial expression is priceless!

 

"He is currently the reigning and defending US champion, Bret "Hitman" Clark." - Michael Buffer introducing Bret Hart

[Toshiaki Koala 0]

Snitsky: "I like your poetry."

Heidenreich: "I like what you do to babies."

 

Not 'Old School,' but classic nonetheless.

[brighty 0]

i've gotta go with the introductions for the Over The Edge 98 Austin/Dude Love main event:

 

Finkel: Ladies and Gentlemen, at this time it is my privilege and honour to introduce to you a man who for four decades has gained squared circle like no other before him. A man who built a career on pride, honour and integrity. A legend who held over 20 titles throughout his illustrious career. This made made World Wrestling Federation history by becoming the first ever InterContinental Champion by surviving a gruelling tournament in Rio de Janiero. When we speak of this man, we can only compare him to other Canadian legends like Wayne Gretsky, Gordy Howe and the great Ed Murray. A role model for children, a friend to us all, please welcome tonight’s guest ring announcer, Mr. Pat Patterson.

 

Patterson: Well, for the second guest of the evening. This man is like a beating tom-tom head on the reservation in his Native Oklahoma. Inside this man beats the heartbeat of America. Throughout his esteemed career, which began as an amateur champion at Oklahoma State, this gladiator has truly been the foundation on which this industry was built upon. He’s a loving father, a devoted husband. This man is destined to be the only Native American-Indian in the World Wrestling Federation Hall Of Fame – there goes Strongbow – Some call him the re-incarnation of Jim Thorp, we call him a friend, and, ladies and gentlemen, he’s a proud co-owner of the Brisco Brothers Bodyshop, located at 4315 Nort’ Hubert Avenue, Tampa Florida. Yes, that’s right, 813 879 4421, and folks, it’s worth the drive. Your guest timekeeper this evening in tonight’s main event, Jerry Brisco!

 

Our second guest this evening, there is no word to describe what this next American icon has meant to all of us. We’ve laughed with him, we’ve cried with him, but through it all he made all of our lives worth living. He’s given us hope, love, understanding and the will to say ‘YES I CAN!’ Ladies and Gentlemen, and children of all ages, please stand in honour of our special guest referee, and owner of the World Wrestling Federation, Vince McMahon!

 

And now, the challenger for tonight’s main event, perhaps no greater success stories have been written in the history of the World Wrestling Federation. This rags-to-riches story shows what can happen by following Vince McMahon’s example. He’s an inspiration to us all, and one of the most popular and respected athletes of his generation. Adored by millions as the cat who makes the kittens purr, ladies and gentlemen, your number 1 contender, please give it up for DUUUUUDE LOVE!

 

And now his opponent (crowd is rabid by this point): Just sit back and relax for a minute, just sit down for a minute and be quiet. First of all, he is a beer swilling fool. He is a foul-mouthed punk (Lawler: finally a real ring announcer!); he’s a disgrace to every human being today. Well I got news for you, I am not going to introduce a bum.

 

Lawler: I don’t blame him

Ross: This man needs no introduction!

*glass breaks, arena goes fucking mad*

[alfdogg 0]

I'll never forget Big Show being arrested at WM15.

 

"Sir, you need to put your hands behind your back."

 

"Yeah, and you need a new haircut, Bob Newhart!"

[CanadianGuitarist 0]

 

New favourite:

 

Hospital Worker: Here's your juice Mr. McMahon.

Vince:(takes a sip) I WANTED APPLE JUICE!!!!!!

Lawler: Make it fresh squeezed, too!

[Austin3164life 0]

From Harley Race's book: "Pain is temporary. Pride is forever."

[alfdogg 0]

I finally saw the infamous "Tony calls a table a chair" moment the other night. Heenan runs with it the whole match ("Have you ever been to the Schiavone house for dinner? They eat off chairs!"), and even Tenay has to contain laughter.

[Guest Askewniverse]

The British Bulldog: "I don't give a frog's fat ass what Shawn Michaels thinks."

[Special K 0]

Have been in this thread for a while, and this may have been quoted alreaty, if so, I apologize.

 

Nash, the crowning moments of the nWo invasion: So this is where the big boys play? Look at like the ADJECTIVE. Play. Even as a 14-15 year old mark, I doh'ed at that.

[Star Ocean 3 0]

Tonight on the King's Court, I will be talking to Bret "The Hitman Hart. You know, the guy with those Jurassic Park parents. You know Stu Hart is so old, I told him to act his age, so he dropped dead and Helen Hart, well, she was just born old. When she was a teenager, her acne had liver spots.

(This is when Bret Hart enters the ring in the King's court)

Jerry: Before I talk to you about your upcoming match with Big Daddy Cool Diesel, I want to talk about something that took place a year ago at the upcoming event (King of the Ring '94). Do you remember when I crowned you? Ha!Ha!Ha! Do you remember, or do you have so much oil on your head that it slipped your mind? - Jerry Lawler

 

What the heck...this is great stuff. What happened to Lawler? Did he run out of material?

[JHawk 0]

I don't remember if anybody's mentioned this one or not:

 

Jim Cornette: "Paul E., I understand that you spent $500 having your family tree researched and found out you were the sap."

[Guest Professor X]

Dusty :"For eight or nine months, you've been grabbin' all your friends and your bosom buddies - you been holding back other athletes. I been settin - whatchoo gonna do, fire me, hell I don't even work here! Hey hey hey don't, don't go out, don't go out, don't go out. Most of all, you been sidesteppin' Dustin Rhodes, MOST OF ALL you been coming out here wishin' that you gonna be in charge - lemme tell you something, this people's butts that you been kissin', there's new owners, they ain't gonna be here no more, you know what I'm talkin' about? They ain't gonna be here! And lemme tell you something else, Nature Boy, when you talk about this building - when you talk about this ring, you're talkin' 'bout hollowed (hallowed?) ground. You're talkin' 'bout ground that I kicked your ass night after night after night after night. You talkin' about a new era - you're talkin' about young studs! You talkin' about dealing with the dealer, and lemme tell you why - lemme tell you and you listen to this, and tell your family this - from now on, from now on, hell's coming, and I'm coming with him, brother - you know what I'm talking about? Hey hey, whoa, lemme tell you, last but not least, Animal....all puffy...Animal's all puffed up. Animal's got all that ol' puffed up muscle - well, you come back in here, you gonna find out that this ol' fat boy from Austin, Texas will kick a little bit of YOUR booty, too - so you wanna fight? Hey, you guys wanna fight - well, you got one comin' and it's comin' tonight."

[CBright7831 0]

Jerry Lawler (on Tazz): "He looked alot bigger on the Lucky Charms box, McMahon."

 

Jerry Lawler (walking around an ECW ring): "HEY! THEY SHOULD BUILD THIS BUILDING OUT OF TOILET PAPER BECAUSE IT'S FULL OF SHIT!"

[CBright7831 0]

Heres a link to diarrhea load of Bobby Heenan quotes:

 

http://www.cagematch.de/_/features/archive...ny/heenan.shtml

[Guest Professor X]

Lex Lugar:"The moment of truth, the crossing roads in WCW has finally arrived. The true superstars of our sport are ready to regain centre stage, as it has been, as it always should be. So what Ric Flair meant to say was, the deal the new CEO of WCW did, was he promised me if I looked after his boy, that the Total Package, all six-foot-four, 280 pounds and 5% body fat is, as of now, reinstated fully in WCW. Multi-time World champion, multi-time US Champion, multi-time world tag team champion, and a multi-millionaire - that's me, the Total Package, the one and only!