Chuck Woolery 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 (edited) The Smartmarks Wrestling Federation presents... SWF 13TH HOUR, JUNE 12, 2005, LIVE FROM ST. PETER'S SQUARE IN THE VATICAN CITY! (10:00 PM EST, 7:00 PM PST; check local listings) (send everything to Chuck Woolery) After the strongest Smarkdown in a long time, the SWF travels from Egypt to the Vatican City for the final stop of the world-wide leg of the It's The End Of The World (And We Like It) tour, and the first stop on the European leg! Feuds have been simmering for weeks, Smarkdown brought them to a boil and added some fresh spice into the mix, and this Sunday in the Vatican, dinner is served! MAIN EVENT 30-MINUTE IRON MAN MATCH Wildchild v. "The Critic" Scott Pretzler -> And so, it all comes down to this. The number one contendership to the Cruiserweight championship happens to be on the line as well, but for these two men there is so much more at stake. After years of trying to start, revitalize, and save the Cruiserweight division, Wildchild -- with some help from Scott Pretzler -- has succeeded in bringing cruiserweight wrestling to the main event of an SWF pay-per-view. After their submissions match and their zero-gravity match, both of these men have all right to be exhausted, but they'll gut it out one last time, for one half-hour, to determine who really is the best. Rules: Twenty-count outside the ring. Pinfalls, submissions, count-outs, and disqualifications all count as one point. The person with the most points at the end of the thirty-minute round will be declared the winner. If the two men are tied after thirty minutes, there will be a thirty-second rest period followed by a sudden-death overtime. Marker: Ace309 SWF WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP Ejiro Fasaki (SWF World Heavyweight Champion) v. Lil' Buck -> And from a story of hatred to a story of... lackadaisicalness? Sorry, the word was in my head. Ejiro Fasaki's reign as World champion has been less than stellar, marked most recently by another loss to Johnny Dangerous in tag competition. Remarkably, Dangerous is unbooked tonight, and after a brief meeting, SWFCC decided that Lil' Buck would receive another shot at the champ. Can Buck pull it out this time, or will Ejiro Fasaki finally start to shine again? Rules: Standard. Marker: Chuck Woolery GRUDGE MATCH Danny Williams v. "The Franchise" Mak Francis -> Does this even need an explanation? Francis has debuted a new move. It's deadly and illegal in Utah, Montana, and the island of Puerto Rico -- luckily, none of those are stops on the second leg of our World tour. Danny Williams has called Francis out, saying that he's resorting to dishonest tactics, something like that. Personally, I wouldn't mind if Mak brought a gun to the ring and pistol-whipped people, but I like feeding into stereotypes. Anyway, Danny's going to try to beat some sense and respect into Mak, and Mak's going to make Danny bleed enough to fill the tank on an H2. Rules: Standard, as far as I know. If there's a stip, you should both know it. Marker: janusd LAST MAN STANDING Toxxic v. "Hollywood" Spike Jenkins -> Spiking other people's drinks is not cool, and Toxxic is out for blood. God only knows what Toxxic took (LSD), but whatever it was it was most certainly against the rules of straight-edgedom, and anything that makes Toxxic break his Zen-like control over his body's intake is cause for a beatdown. Jenkins has been itching for his shot at Toxxic since Indonesia, and now he gets it. Careers have been ended in Last Man Standing matches... and with Toxxic's fury, it's more than likely that Spike Jenkins will be the next name on that list. Rules: Disqualifications and count-outs do not apply. A pinfall or submission is cool, but in order to win the match you must render your opponent unable to stand up for ten counts. Marker: chirs3 SWF INTERNATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP LET MY PEOPLE GO! MATCH Arch Griffon (SWF International Champion) v. "The Dean of Professional Wrestling" Jay Hawke -> Griffon and Hawke have issues, all of which revolve around the International Championship. In Jakarta, Hawke retained his belt through rather... nefarious means, and Sean Combs was so outraged that he granted Griffon an immediate rematch. In Seychelles, Griffon made good, walking away with the belt. In the Vatican, somebody's going to walk away with the belt... can Hawke become the first-ever two-time International champion, or will Arch Griffon prove that Hawke just can't win by himself? Rules: Restholds have been outlawed for this match. It will be referee Nick Soapdish's discretion as to what is and what is not a resthold. When he spots a resthold being applied, he will make a certain signal to an organist who has a church organ set up at ringside. The organ will blare. This is the signal to release the hold. If the combatant doesn't do this, the organ will blare a second time about two seconds after the initial sound. This will get rid of annoying five counts. If it blares twice, the attacker is disqualified. Marker: The Superstar SWF TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS Martial Law ("Urban Legend" Todd Cortez and Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix, SWF Tag Team Champions) v. THE MYSTERIOUS ARMY (??? and ???) -> Manson and Arch Griffon are booked. Wildchild is booked. So Joseph Peters and Tom Flesher made some phone calls, and here's THE MYSTERIOUS ARMY to take on Martial Law for the tag belts. It should be fun... and MYSTERIOUS. Rules: Standard tag. Marker: Chuck Woolery SWF HARDCORE CHAMPIONSHIP STAINED GLASS WINDOW PAIN MATCH Insane Luchadore (SWF Hardcore Champion) v. Manson v. "The Maniac" Bryan Rodgers v. Zyon -> Look at all the stained glass windows in the Vatican City. Let's smash them. Rules: A competitor is eliminated when they are thrown through a stained-glass window. The last man remaining in the match wins. Marker: El Luchadore Magnifico Edited June 7, 2005 by Chuck Woolery Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. S£im Citrus 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 ... The Cruiserweight Division main events an SWF Pay-Per-View... I can die happy. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HollywoodSpikeJenkins 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 It also opens the show. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. S£im Citrus 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 No, the Hardcore division opens the show; Manson + Rodgers = heavyweights. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Secret Agent 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 What; no Johnny versus Tom Flesher? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 13th Hour...Ironman Match... *starts shivering uncontrollably* ...too many...bad...memories. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Secret Agent 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 Bad memories? You didn't even bother to show up, Tard! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 Exactly! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HollywoodSpikeJenkins 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 No, the Hardcore division opens the show; Manson + Rodgers = heavyweights. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> But IL is the CW champ... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
muzz 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 What the hell is that match doing in the Main Event? And by that, I mean why isn't the World Title match last since it (almost) always is? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
janusd 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 Oooh, Mak and Danny. Should be nice and technical... with a side plate of elbows. Lots of elbows. Marking ahoy! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Secret Agent 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 What the hell is that match doing in the Main Event? And by that, I mean why isn't the World Title match last since it (almost) always is? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Ejiro's getting the Benoit treatment. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Above Average 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 I forgot to send my opening promo for the show, which would answer Mike's questions. Yes it's straight singles, my finisher is not illegal in Philly (since I stole it from a CZW alumn) and I could pistol whip him if you want... I'll post it when I get off work at some point. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ace309 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 What the hell is that match doing in the Main Event? And by that, I mean why isn't the World Title match last since it (almost) always is? We're doing one of those weird "angle" things. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zack Malibu 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 So is the Mysterious Army going to be somebody that we should know about, or is it "feeding random jobbers to the tag champs on PPV" kinda deal? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ace309 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 I've been informed of their identity. I'm excited. So, not the jobbers. Mike will tell you. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
devo 0 Report post Posted June 7, 2005 Cool, I wasn't sure if I was gonna get a match to mark or not. And damn if I didn't get a fun one. =) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JHawk 0 Report post Posted June 8, 2005 Just a note Arch, check the stats thread as I'm about to add a couple of moves to the permanent moveset. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sly 0 Report post Posted June 8, 2005 Interesting to see Wildchild headlining a PPV... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. S£im Citrus 0 Report post Posted June 8, 2005 Ol' Crash sure has come a long way, hasn't he? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Toxxic 0 Report post Posted June 8, 2005 I know I'd mark out if you won with the Dreaded Hop Splash. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ace309 0 Report post Posted June 8, 2005 Crash Holly is dead. ::cocks gun:: Sorry, WC, but you know the rules. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheBostonStrangler 0 Report post Posted June 9, 2005 *jumps in front of bullet* I WC! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ace309 0 Report post Posted June 13, 2005 MARKERS: Don't send things to Chuck Woolery! Ace309's the wave of the future! ... seriously, I've got what he's got for now, but send the rest of it my way. Promos included. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted June 13, 2005 So what the fuck am I supposed to do, considering he's finishing off the Tag Title Match? Leave it out if you want, I'm not really bothered. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ace309 0 Report post Posted June 13, 2005 I have a complete tag match that was properly marked. I unfortunately had some tech difficulties that are delaying the show, but it'll be up soon. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted June 13, 2005 Well, that's cool then. I was just saying, if it's my match you were waiting on, it'd be best to put the show up without it because of...reasons. Yeah, reasons. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chuck Woolery 0 Report post Posted June 13, 2005 You are such a bastard, Landon. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JJ Johnson 0 Report post Posted June 13, 2005 I'm still laughing about the word "traveshamockery". That was awesomely lame, just like "The jerk store called. They're running out of YOU!" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
janusd 0 Report post Posted June 13, 2005 Total Matches Marked To Date: 2 Total Number Of Matches Where One Side Couldn't Show: 2 I hope this doesn't become a common occurence. And sorry for sending things off late. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
