The OAO Raw thread for 08.01.05

[Ted the Poster 0]

I thought we were talking about Steph, not Terri.

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It's called LFing.

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For years I thought those were her shoulder blades.... but they were really just dents from the application process.

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Fun fact: Terri's implants are actually gerbil exercise balls.

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Fun Fact: Richard Gere will now get implants.

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[Silence 0]

Incidentally, what was with Matt saying all that shit about "Edge took away my chance at a family, to have kids, etc."  Dude, you can't be like Uncle Eddie and knock up some skank or something?  Get over it, holmes.  Get a new chick.

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Matt Hardy has become a fucking psycho this year. That's why we keep hearing the same emotionally-disturbed drivel from his mouth every time he opens it now.

[Exslade ZX 0]

The crowd  going apeshit during the opening tag and the dead crowd in the Venis/Conway match proves that even in this day and age fans will respond to pushed wrestlers more and will shit on wrestlers who have no direction or focus (no matter how talented).  Vince was probably creaming himself at the heat Masters got.

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I don't believe that's true at all. Some fans would just rather cheer someover others..even if it's someone the IWC considers 'good'. Point and case...Hurricane still has the fans going 'apeshit' (which if you consider the reaction tonight that, then that's what Hurricane gets) and he isn't exactly getting a push. Funaki somehow still gets cheers to this day. Val Venis has for years...although on Heat, been getting a bigger push then both of them, and more then a lot of people. (as he appears on almost every heat..)

 

I for one just think Val is boring as hell. And I don't think it's really the gimmicks he's been given either, I just don't see what everyone else sees I guess. that's not to say a few matches of his I haven't found good, as I loved Orton/Venis, and I don't think I'll ever forget Rikishi diving on him >_>. I just don't get what all the fuss about...because when even when he is pushed (because the Chief Morley gimmick wasn't THAT horrible) the fans still dont' respond to him.

[Angle-plex 0]

When the most memorable thing on the show is the one time return on Tatanka - a fucking midcard wrestler from 12 years ago - you know something is seriously wrong with your product.

[Exslade ZX 0]

When the most memorable thing on the show is the one time return on Tatanka - a fucking midcard wrestler from 12 years ago - you know something is seriously wrong with your product.

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I thought the most memorable thing was a match consisting of Big Show/Masters/Snitsky as 75% of the participants being pretty decent to good..

[AlaskanHero 0]

When the most memorable thing on the show is the one time return on Tatanka - a fucking midcard wrestler from 12 years ago - you know something is seriously wrong with your product.

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I was about to disagree with you, but then I realized that I forgot just about everything that happened in the show. I'm feel ashamed.

[Gary Floyd 0]

I was only able to watch about 15 or 20 minutes of Raw. Guess I'm lucky.

[Guest Fook]

Raw Thoughts:

 

- Surprisingly good tag match. And it wasn't a carry job by Shelton either. I could see something in a permanent Snitsky/Masters team. Then we might actually have a feud over the tag titles.

 

- When did Conway become Buff Bagwell - The Next Generation? The match wasn't that bad, although the crowd seemed to disagree. I liked Conway wrestling with his sunglasses, although when they were knocked off I was seriously expecting him to grab a mike and say "Those were $500 sunglasses asshole!"

 

- Holy shit did Tatanka grow a gut. And why was Eugene able to challenge last week despite not being from Cleveland, but Angle is not allowed to this week? Christy as a cheerleader = Yum.

 

- Disappointing promo from Hardy. He went too long and said some absurd things (Edge ruined his dream? Car accident? Kayfabe, what's that?). He should have kept his loose cannon type character at least somewhat by going off on Vince for firing him instead of thanking him. At least now he's back on Rhawl for good. And to think, all this time we've all been mispronouncing Lita's name.

 

- Didn't watch the diva shit. From what I read, Rob Schneider came out to promote his shitty new movie and cop feels of the girls. Meh.

 

- Michaels imitating Hogan was funny, although his accusing Hogan of playing politics is kinda hypocritical. And by "kinda" I mean "extremely".

 

- The Cena/Carlito match was literally the exact same bad match as last week's, only with the opposite finish. And where the hell did that second referee come from? If I were booking, I'd have Shelton come out to attack Carlito, as he's still pissed about losing the IC title, and help Cena win leading to a Cena/Shelton vs Jericho/Carlito match next week. Good beatdown by Jericho though. And Bischoff too.

 

Bischoff: Hey Cena! What did the five fingers say to the face? SLAP! I'm the GM bitch!

[slimm44 0]

The Hogan skit was the funniest thing I've seen since DX's 'Have a bad day' back in 2000

[notJames 0]

That's not saying much.

 

Man, I can't wait 'til SS is over so I don't have to put up with Jurassic Park 4 ever again. When your PPV is centered around two nostalgia acts, you know you're in trouble.

[The Amazing Rando 0]

That's not saying much.

 

Man, I can't wait 'til SS is over so I don't have to put up with Jurassic Park 4 ever again. When your PPV is centered around two nostalgia acts, you know you're in trouble.

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Oddly enough they actually are MAKING a Jurassic Park IV. Apparently the T-Rexs do legdrops and pose in this one.

[WrestlingFan4Ever 0]

Last time I checked, nostalgia acts don't have MOTYC candidates, aka the two Angle matches and the Raw MOTY so far against Benjamin. Anyway, that Shawn imitation was hilarious. It had me and my friends laughing our asses off.

[CBright7831 0]

I thought we were talking about Steph, not Terri.

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It's called LFing.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

For years I thought those were her shoulder blades.... but they were really just dents from the application process.

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Fun fact: Terri's implants are actually gerbil exercise balls.

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Fun Fact: Richard Gere will now get implants.

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Cute.

[Fökai 0]

Okay - I marked for Randy Newman, the Huckster and Rob Schneider. On an episode of Monday Night Raw.

 

Kill me now.

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

You want it in the back of the head, or do you want to see it coming?

[Downhome 0]

RAW was shit tonight for the most part. It's a sad and pathetic day when I am able to say, with a straight face mind you, that Chris fuckin' Masters and Gene Snitsky were my second favorite part of the entire show (I loved the HBK stuff).

 

I mean, what the hell?

 

I'm just glad I couldn't watch it live tonight, and watched it on DVR.

 

The best part of the night to me was the return of Mike Sanders and his "pony".

[Fökai 0]

You want it in the back of the head, or do you want to see it coming?

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Given how much I loathe Rob Schneider, even when he's parodying himself, he saved the show tonight; then again, it was probably the lesser of two evils with the shit I had to sit through after the tag match.

 

I want to see it coming from a mile away, Rudo -- I'm a WWE fan, so you can't expect anything different.

 

EDIT: I also can't believe how much I hate Snitsky. This is the most contempt I've held for a wrestling personality in my lifetime. I've never wished physical harm before to any wrestler... even Mark Henry. There are no words to describe how much I loathe everything about him, from his character, to his facial expressions, to his selling, to his promo ablility, to his sheer ineptitude in the ring. Snitsky has ceased to be funny in an IWC-"he's so bad, he's good" manner, but has since completed another revolution to become the the biggest waste of wrestling tights on this continent.

[packwingfn 0]

Does anyone know when RVD will be back?

 

IF he was ready to wrestle at Summerslam, I would say he should have saved Cena...say if Carlito and Jericho were double-teaming him. So that way, Carlito has a match for Summerslam for the IC Title.

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Chris Masters will gain a following by Fall. Guaranteed.

[Crimson Platypus 0]

That's about 900 brothers in the span of two minutes. Like Lita at a famly reunion.

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1. Easily the post of the thread.

 

2. I was thinking when Shawn first came out that he should say brutha as often as possible, when he started just saying brutha at random I was cracking up. That promo was solid gold.

 

 

The only real knock I had with the Conway/Val match was that it seemed like a typical Heat fare, whereas on Raw they should step it up a notch.  The sad aspect of it is that I like Conway and heard they want to push him, but after the reception he got tonight....eh.

 

Raw desperately needs someone who can bust some moves out.  I'll be glad when Van Dam gets back, if nothing else he'll actually wrestle matches and do some wild spots....lord knows they won't put him on the mic for 10 mins a la Matt tonight.

 

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Dude they won't let people "bust some moves out" anymore. It's the WWE "Main Event Style". It's boring and unentertaining. I was just wishing for a suplex, or a bodyslam, or ANYTHING from Conway and Venis, thinking that it would be a good match. Instead we got a lolbrawlomg. How utterly boring.

[The Mandarin 0]

This RAW completely lacked originality, memorability, entertainment, feud developments, in-ring work, out-of-ring work, atmosphere, logic and meaning.

 

Plus it had the SAME FUCKING MAIN EVENT as last week. I know it's summer but a LIVE SHOW should not put on repeats.

 

-***/*****

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You can all stop typing up recaps of the show. This pretty much summed up the evening.

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I thought it was better than last week's, which was approx. -****1/2, but his star rating is still accurate.

[Guest Biggles]

My only real thought that, while it might be nice to see Matt Hardy back, he didn't have to kill Kane. Jesus. Kane's whole character is about that angle, and Matt Hardy just shot him. That's been his whole story for what, a year now? Won't be seeing him for a while, I imagine.

[Dr. Zaius 0]

I have absolutely no problem with them aborting the Kane/Edge feud.

[Team Angle Pusher 0]

I know everybody will shit on me after I say this but I think Chris Masters isn't as bad as everyone thinks he is. He has potential to be a pretty decent big guy.

[Guest JMA]

I have absolutely no problem with them aborting the Kane/Edge feud.

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Neither do I. That feud pretty much hurt both Kane AND Edge with its incredible lack of heat.

 

I suspect Kane's character will be revamped when he returns--which might be a good thing for him.

[Angle-plex 0]

Msters is surprisingly decent. Nothing special, but they're making him look strong. Although not as strong as BIG SHOW, who can't be effected by any move ever. Snitsky is blah, and Shelton "All the potential in the world" Benjamin did his usual spots and nothing else.

 

Angle had NO heat last night when he came out, so you know all the momentum he got from going to RAW is gone. He wants to make Eugene "more special". Ooooooooo. I want to see this match now.

 

The HBK thing was funny at first, but it went on too long and at the end it seemed like he was desperate for a laugh. He looked like an asshole at the end trying to convert to being serious while still having the fake mustache on.

 

Conway looked cool, but having him fight a jobber and struggle to beat said jobber wasn't exactly a great way to debut him.

 

Diva search was eh. Elizabeth is going to go with Coach...hahahahaha! Of course she's not. He's black. She'd rather go with the short, rich white guy that just threw her down in the ring thirty seconds before.

 

Jericho/Cena is really bad. Cena can beat Carlito, Bish and Jericho at the same time, so why would Jericho have a chance one on one?

[Silence 0]

Diva search was eh. Elizabeth is going to go with Coach...hahahahaha! Of course she's not. He's black. She'd rather go with the short, rich white guy that just threw her down in the ring thirty seconds before.

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Another good message sent by WWE. That's right up there with Stacy Keibler not getting a Stunner two years ago after Stone Cold had her to drink beer for the second time and she accepted.

[Guest JMA]

Angle had NO heat last night when he came out, so you know all the momentum he got from going to RAW is gone. He wants to make Eugene "more special". Ooooooooo. I want to see this match now.

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To be fair to Angle, the crowd last night was pretty bad. But yes, this feud doesn't look interesting at all.

[JoeDirt 0]

I loved the HBK promo and the beatdown on Cena. The rest of the show was just there.

[cabbageboy 0]

Well what I mean by busting stuff out is doing ANY sort of notable moves. As in something besides the neverending headlock fest that Raw has become.

 

The problem I think they have is that they are pushing the wrong people. Eugene right now has no business wrestling Kurt Angle, it's a total mismatch. Also, what is Shelton doing dicking around with Chris Masters and Snitsky?

 

Also, why does it seem like no one has a fucking finisher? Carlito has been around since October or so and I still don't know what this guy is supposed to do to put an opponent down for 3. If nothing else Chris Masters is being built around having an invincible finisher that no one can get out of.

 

What is Gene Snitsky's finisher? Carlito? Orlando Jordan? To me the coolest thing about a wrestler has always been the finisher. When I think Jake Roberts I think DDT, etc.