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Posted

http://tolerance.org/parents/kidsarticle.jsp?p=0&ar=36

 

A few years ago, at the end of an unusually hot spring break, my 10-year-old daughter and her 13-year-old friend were playing at the neighborhood community center.

 

After a little while, a group of neighborhood kids of varying ages, from third-grade elementary students to middle-school kids, began to taunt them and call them names.

 

The kids, who were black, called my daughter and her friend "white bitches" and other slurs. When my daughter and her friend tried to leave, the kids encircled them and started throwing rocks.

 

A younger girl — a neighbor of ours — picked up a large rock and threw it at my daughter's back, leaving a fist-sized bruise. My daughter picked up a large stick to defend herself, yelled at the girl to stop and broke free. The girls ran home as fast as they could, breaking down and crying once they reached the house.

 

My immediate reaction was to offer ice for their injuries, and then to stop and think. But the other girl's mother flew into a rage and immediately made a call to police, during which she mentioned "reverse racism." My gut clenched up tight.

 

Although the children had hurled racial slurs, I did not feel the incident had much to do with racism at all.

 

*slap*

Although I did not believe the incident stemmed from racism, it did provide a meaningful opportunity to discuss both bullying and racism with my daughter.

 

I explained to her that racism involves power. White-on-black racial slurs, as well as racial violence, have historically been used to dehumanize blacks, to "put them in their place," allowing whites to maintain power.

 

Black-on-white racial slurs, on the other hand, are more of a reaction — not a means for maintaining power. The kids were no doubt dehumanizing my daughter and her friend, but that's what kids do when they bully other kids.

 

*slap slap slap*

 

I explained to my daughter that bullies act out because they are afraid.

 

*slap slap slap slap slap slap slap slap slap slap slap slap slap slap slap slap slap slap slap slap*

Elizabeth Bauchner lives in Ithaca, New York with her three children. Her work has appeared in Brain, Child Magazine, Women's eNews, and on this Web site.

 

If you need me, I have to go push someone out of a window.

Posted
I explained to her that racism involves power. White-on-black racial slurs, as well as racial violence, have historically been used to dehumanize blacks, to "put them in their place," allowing whites to maintain power.

 

Black-on-white racial slurs, on the other hand, are more of a reaction — not a means for maintaining power. The kids were no doubt dehumanizing my daughter and her friend, but that's what kids do when they bully other kids.

 

Although the mom erred for saying racism involves power (its a common misconception amongst social scientists that racism must involve power to exist), her explanation of why the children were attacking makes perfect sense.

 

 

MrRant also left out this important piece of the story:

 

My daughter's teacher talked to both my daughter and the girl who threw the rock at her. The girl admitted that she had nothing against whites; she just said something stupid and mean, as kids sometimes do.

 

which validates the writer's point.

 

Good job.

Posted

Racism is racism...I don't care if it comes from blacks, whites, Martians...doesn't matter. And racism stems really from ignorance and either not knowing (or wanting to know) any better. If you're ignorant enough to call someone a racial slur regardless of the color of your own skin then I have no sympathy for you. And no...just because you're of a minority (although in the States it won't matter soon as whites will become the minority) doesn't give you a free pass to be ignorant. It's enough for me to live up to the standard I set...I don't feel the need to live up to another person's standard.

 

Bullying is about power...kids holding power over someone else. Perhaps these kids don't have that power at home or whatever...so they take it out on other kids and get that power. There are plenty of other reasons for bullying I know...the key is to stand up to the bully and in most cases the bully leaves you alone when they see you aren't being controlled by their actions.

Posted
Racism is racism...I don't care if it comes from blacks, whites, Martians...doesn't matter.  And racism stems really from ignorance and either not knowing (or wanting to know) any better.  If you're ignorant enough to call someone a racial slur regardless of the color of your own skin then I have no sympathy for you.  And no...just because you're of a minority (although in the States it won't matter soon as whites will become the minority)  doesn't give you a free pass to be ignorant.  It's enough for me to live up to the standard I set...I don't feel the need to live up to another person's standard.

 

Bullying is about power...kids holding power over someone else.  Perhaps these kids don't have that power at home or whatever...so they take it out on other kids and get that power.  There are plenty of other reasons for bullying I know...the key is to stand up to the bully and in most cases the bully leaves you alone when they see you aren't being controlled by their actions.

 

By population, aye. However, non-whites still have a long road of trying to achieve equal opportunity ahead of them.

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