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*Smackdown Spoilers*

strummer

By strummer
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strummer Newbie

strummer

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SD results from August 9th in Columbus Ohio. Some stuff might be out of order but the match info is all correct -

 

Velocity:

 

Kazarian defeated London by using the ropes, London grabs mic and cuts a 30 second whiny promo that didn't make sense about him always getting screwed.

 

WWE Cruiserweight champ Nunzio defeats ?

 

Ken "Mr." Anderson defeats Funaki

 

Hardcore Holly defeats Steven Richards with an Alabama Slam. No Blue Meanie. No Nova.

 

Smackdown!:

 

Booker T vs. Joey Mercury. Melina, Jillian and Nitro accompany Mercury to the ring, Sharmel accompanies Booker. Jillian distracts the ref while Nitro beats on Booker T, ref sees and throws out Jillian and Nitro. Booker T wins with a really bad scissors kick.

 

Peep Show with Guest WWE champion Batista - Christian complains about not having a match at Summer Slam, challenges Batista for later. Batista accepts.

 

Animal and Heidenreich are shown walking to the ring backstage

 

WWE World Tag Team champions Animal and Heidenreich defeat two jobbers with a Doomsday Device. No shoulder pads for Heidenreich yet.

 

Randy Orton and Teddy Long argue backstage, Teddy says Orton has a match against a Legend who had a legendary feud with the Undertaker

 

Orton comes out to the ring and his opponent is Kamala. Orton hits RKO, poses, Taker's music hits and a RIP Randy video is shown. Match ends in no contest I think.

 

John Cena's new music video plays.

 

The Mexicools come out on their Juan Deeres. Match is Super Crazy and Psicosis vs. Scotty Too Hotty and William Regal Partway through the match Regal decides to leave, and Psicosis did his legdrop and pins Scotty. This was the same deal they taped last week in Bridgeport, CT but didn't air it.

 

Chris Benoit defeats Simon Dean with the Crossface. Crowd went nuts for Benoit.

 

WWE World champion Batista and Christian went for a little while, mainly Batista owning Christian, then Batista hits a spinebuster. He is going for the Batista Bomb when JBL comes out and interferes. Match is over, but it sets up the dark match main event which is a JBL vs. Batista Street fight, lasting about 5 minutes with Batista winning.

 

Somewhere in all the mess was a 20 minute Eddie/Rey segment where Eddie brought a child service worker out to take Dominic and give him to Eddie. After 20 minutes of nonsensical bantering between Eddie and Rey the children's service worker decides to put Dominic in a foster home. The Eddie vs. Rey custody match is set up for Summer Slam.

 

PWI

Open the Muggy Gate Newbie

Open the Muggy Gate

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Random Muggy Thoughts:

 

Good news: They're pushing Kazarian. Bad news: WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY DOING TO LONDON?

 

Mr. Anderson? Anyone wanna guess what the fuck this is about?

 

Can somebody find two actual opponents for Animal and Heidenreich... PLEASE?

 

I will mark out for Kamala. I can't lie.

 

Why o why do they treat Christian like this? I say blame Johnny Ace. That's what all the cool kids are doing these days.

 

This Eddie/Rey stuff... I still say it's the feud of the year... but man they are trying to drag this through the mud. I say the foster parent ends up being the Boogeyman for no goddamn reason... who knows what they're doing these days. Spin the wheel, hey that'll work...

Guest fanofcoils

Guest fanofcoils

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This Smackdown looks horrible as most or all Smackdowns do in terms of drawing ratings. Booker T vs Mercury? Animal and Heidenreich vs two jobbers, etc. The only thing that looks Rawish in ratings is the Peep Show and the main event. The only other interesting thing on this Smackdown in my opinion is the return of Kamala. The problem with this Smackdown and most or all Smackdowns I think is that there is barely anything really interesting up till the main event, and the main event isn't always interesting.

UZI Suicide Newbie

UZI Suicide

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The Mexicools come out on their Juan Deeres. Match is Super Crazy and Psicosis vs. Scotty Too Hotty and William Regal Partway through the match Regal decides to leave, and Psicosis did his legdrop and pins Scotty

 

Hopefully setting up the long awaited William Regal-Scottie 2 Hotty feud?!

Vyce Newbie

Vyce

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Sweet Jesus Christ, they ARE going to do a Rey / Eddie "Custody of Dominic" match at Eddie.

 

Leading to the 395th Guerrero loss, I'm guessing, because how else could it end?

iggymcfly Newbie

iggymcfly

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I already assumed that the custody match would happen, but good god. Even for Smackdown, that looks like an AWFUL show. Like worst Smackdown ever caliber.

 

Do they not realize that they've already main evented three shows with Christian vs. Batista in the last month? And it's a squash every single time. I mean do they really think that JBL/Batista has enough heat that JBL coming out after the match constitutes a main event segment?

 

And the other stuff looks so boring that it's hardly worth mentioning. In addition to the Batista pseudo squash, there are actually three legitimate squash matches on the show. (Animal and Hawk vs. jobbers, Orton vs. Kamala, and Benoit vs. Simon Dean.) Someone needs to tell the booking crew that it's not 1989.

Guest The Minor Threat

Guest The Minor Threat

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The ? that Nunzio beat is apparently Jimmy Jacobs.

 

You'll remember him as the jobber who beat Eddie Guerrero.

Guest JMA

Guest JMA

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Seems like another bland show. I think I'll pass.

 

But there is one thing I have to comment on: Why the hell are Heidenreich and Animal still tag team champions? They're not doing the belts any favors if all they beat are jobbers.

 

And I'm BEGGING WWE to drop the Simon Dean gimmick. No one cares about it.

Guest karlitoapple

Guest karlitoapple

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Mr. Anderson? Anyone wanna guess what the fuck this is about?

 

Obviously Ken Anderson is The One.

 

I hear they're bringing in that TNA chick to be his valet.

 

Who is this TNA chick that you are talking about?

Guest thebooker

Guest thebooker

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just when you thought smackdown couldn't get uglier it does, seriously how long before this show is defunct, I've seen better episodes of wwf superstars back in the 80s than this rubbish.

Guest Ransome

Guest Ransome

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Somewhere in all the mess was a 20 minute Eddie/Rey segment where Eddie brought a child service worker out to take Dominic and give him to Eddie. After 20 minutes of nonsensical bantering between Eddie and Rey the children's service worker decides to put Dominic in a foster home. The Eddie vs. Rey custody match is set up for Summer Slam.

 

PWI

 

Its seeming less and less likely that the reputations of Eddie Guerrero and Rey Mysterio will ever overcome this mess. In terms of feuds that are merely long, protracted suffering for WWE viewers, it's like Torrie vs Dawn Marie over marrying and murdering Al Wilson all over again. It's not like we can even be glad that this feud has given us great matches, since they haven't yet had the spectacular matches we were anticipating. The Summerslam blowoff better be, like, the greatest match in the history of wrestling to justify the turn the feud has taken.

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