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Guest Tzar Lysergic

NFL week twelve: Turkey Day Cliches

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Guest Tzar Lysergic

Thanksgiving Games

GB @ DET

NYJ @ DAL

IND @ ATL

 

NO @ CAR

TEN @ CIN

MIN @ NYG

SEA @ STL

WAS @ TB

OAK @ KC

BUF @ JAC

HOU @ CLE

SF @ ARI

BAL @ SD

DEN @ CHI

PHI @ NE

 

MIA @ PIT

 

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It's nice that I'll be too gone on a post-Thanksgiving dinner high to care too much about the result of the Jets game this week.

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I wonder if Denver's jekyll and hyde season will continue at Chicago. If they play like they did last night, things are looking good. If they play like they did two weeks ago against Detroit...

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Guest Tzar Lysergic

Jacksonville is in on the three way tie for the second best record in the AFC. I think it will stay that way since Buffalo is going to be ashamed of themselves after being impregnated with Tom Brady's icewater demon seed and left by the wayside.

 

Indy's going to steamroll Atlanta since they can only get healthier at this point, and the Falcons have done nothing this year that impressed me.

 

Pittsburgh at home, angry, against the poor Dolphins? Drubbing.

 

Man, I don't care who wins the Miami/New England game this year, but I'm going to love the result no matter what. Either the Fins lash out like an abused child with a pocket knife against a nightmarish bully and pull off the biggest upset in NFL history (which I say without flinching) or else New England rips the heart and soul out of the old farts from the '72 team that have rested on their laurels to a nauseating degree for three and a half decades.

 

Hopefully the Bears can tread water this week, as Denver's run defense might be the only one in the league that First-Contact Cedric can perform against. Worst "power runner" I've ever seen. Lazy and easily confused in protection, and just stretches out and falls whenever someone tags him. When's the last time this guy carried defenders? Hit the line in stride? Didn't care if he was about to pop headfirst into a safety? He's the Rex Grossman of RBs. Mix that with the Rex Grossman of QBs and you have a Very Grossman Offense, with very decent receivers watching the backfield melt down behind an old offensive line. They're two losses away from being totally and completely fucked, and Green Bay, the Giants, @ Washington, and @ Minnesota are in front of them. That's salty. I'm optimistically predicting 7-9, but wouldn't be shocked by 5-11. Fuckin' sad after the year they had last season.

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Guest Pizza Hut's Game Face

I know it's not the appropriate place, but fuck, Mecca, you're so fucking homosexual.

 

th_John-Morrison.gif4zm0sxc.gifJohnMorrison.jpg

 

To get back on topic, the Bears are probably going to lose again because Lovie Smith is their coach. More on this shocking development in a thread I'm about to start.

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how long has it been since a Thanksgiving Detroit game has actually been worth watching?

 

That game against the Packers in 2001 when Mike McMahon led that amazing comeback only to come up just short (by 3 I think it was) was a good one. But as in a game I actually felt like would be enjoyable going into the game? When did Barry Sanders retire?

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The last time the Lions were in a playoff race this late in the year was 2000, a couple years after Barry retired, and ended up missing the playoffs at 9-7.

 

Ironically, they blew out the Patriots that Thanksgiving (the year before New England started the dynasty).

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well I meant more from the standpoint that it's a must win for Detroit rather than "hey it's turkey day so we get yet another shitty Lions game"?

 

Considering when Barry was on the team, the Lions always came into this game either locked dead heat in a wild card race or fighting to remain IN the race, I'd still have to say the Barry years. It was rare they were dead at this point in the season, usually hovering at 500 and desperate to stay afloat.

 

This is the first time in quite some time where I can remember them having a game that matters without him on the team. It's gotta be at least 7 years. And thanks to the resident Lions supporter, I now know it was seven years.

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Here are the Thanksgiving week picks:

 

GB @ DET: What's this? An actually interesting Lions game on Thanksgiving? Are they losing? Of course they are! Packers by 7.

NYJ @ DAL: The Jets might actually make this fairly interesting, but no way are they winning in Dallas. Cowboys by 10.

IND @ ATL: The Colts are supremely struggling at this point, so I don't expect a blowout here. Colts by 6.

 

NO @ CAR: Both of these teams are reeling right now, the Saints are baffling. I think it continues here, so Carolina by 3.

TEN @ CIN: Don't ask me why but I can't believe the Bengals are this bad. I'll take them to win at home here by 4.

MIN @ NYG: Can't see the Giants losing this one at home, the Vikings just aren't that good. NYG by 9.

SEA @ STL: The Seahawks look great one week, then look like crap the next. This IS the Rams we're talking about though. Seattle by 10.

WAS @ TB: The Redskins seem to play most people tough but can't win. It will continue here. Tampa by 1, 21-20.

OAK @ KC: Croyle doesn't really rock my world, but surely he can win his first game against the Raiders. KC by 5.

BUF @ JAC: The Bills flirted with decency for a few weeks but they might be toast after that Pats beatdown. Jags by 12.

HOU @ CLE: The Browns are a good story this year and I think they can keep it going. They'll win another wild 31-28 type shootout.

SF @ ARI: The Niners may well be the worst team in the league. Arizona by 10.

BAL @ SD: The Ravens are weaker than the Chargers this year and it's in SD, thus Chargers by 7.

DEN @ CHI: For some reason I think we'll get good Rex starting here and the Bears will win it by 3.

PHI @ NE: You want a beatdown? Here it is! Pats by however much they feel like.

 

MIA @ PIT: THIS is a MNF game? Steelers keep the Dolphins winless but it'll be close. Pittsburgh by 3.

 

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With Sean Taylor out with an injury at least through this game with Tampa Bay, a WR like Joey Galloway scares me a lot. He is not as good as Terrell Owens, but he has the size and speed to break a Cover 2 defense. The Redskins Defense/secondary is different without Sean Taylor in the lineup. For evidence look at the 2005 playoff game against in Tampa Bay. The Bucs did nothing on offense, and then Taylor gets ejected and all of the sudden Galloway is getting open deep.

 

Even though this strategy will likely be used by Gruden this week, I don't feel the Bucs have as many weapons as a team like Dallas did in order to spread the ball and take the multiple coverage away from TO. I think the Redskins Defense will find a way to cover Galloway.

 

Also if the Skins coaching staff let Campbell throw the ball around like they did last week and show that kind of confidence in him for the rest of the season.(Added with some of our O-line starters coming back, Sean Taylor back in another week, and Santana Moss getting healthier) I think our offense can finally live up to the potential we as fans thought it had when we drafted Campbell.

 

Redskins 28

Bucs 17

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well I meant more from the standpoint that it's a must win for Detroit rather than "hey it's turkey day so we get yet another shitty Lions game"?

 

Considering when Barry was on the team, the Lions always came into this game either locked dead heat in a wild card race or fighting to remain IN the race, I'd still have to say the Barry years.

During the Wayne Fontes years this was when the Lions, after getting off to a bad start, would start their late-season surge to edge into the playoffs.

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Guest Pizza Hut's Game Face

4zm0sxc.gif4zm0sxc.gif4zm0sxc.gif

4zm0sxc.gif4zm0sxc.gif4zm0sxc.gif

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I'M THE SHAMAN OF SEXY

COME WITH ME TO THE PALACE OF WISDOM

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BY WHICH I MEAN MY COCK

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I'm not feeling too good about the Lions chances, even with all the emotion that comes with playing at home on Thanksgiving. The Packers are long overdue for an off day though so I'm banking on that. This is pretty close to a must-win situation for Detroit seeing as all these 4 and 5 win teams are nipping at their heels and Detroit has lost the tie-breakers to many of those teams. If they can win this Thursday and win at Minnesota the following week, they'll be in a much better spot.

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Guest Vitamin X
I'm optimistically predicting 7-9, but wouldn't be shocked by 5-11. Fuckin' sad after the year they had last season.

HAHAHA. Fuckin' Bears. But don't worry, Chicago alternates their years of mediocrity. They'll be better next year or the one after that.

 

Yea my wrestling stuff sucks even though this is you know a wrestling board.

No it isn't, and it hasn't been for quite some time.

 

During the Wayne Fontes years this was when the Lions, after getting off to a bad start, would start their late-season surge to edge into the playoffs.

Also, Bobby Ross.

 

I'm really worried about the Thanksgiving game. Hard to say it's a trap game because Detroit looks like they're making the playoffs this year, but it's at home and a tradition for them, and I have a feeling that offense is going to have something up their sleeve for Green Bay's defense, and it worries me some. This week will be the test to see if the Pack's offense has finally balanced itself out, because they're going to need that running game in the second half as much as they're going to need Favre's arm in the first to make Detroit play catch up later. I wouldn't be surprised to see them lose, but either way it should be a hell of a game. Late in the season for a first divisional matchup, too.

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Guest Vitamin X

EDIT: Whoops! Double post. But, since I have this post anyways to fill, I thought it would be a fun time to take a look back at this thread and reminisce. I was way off on most of the NFC, and especially off on Denver, who might not even make the playoffs. I must've been drunk while posting that or something. Damn.

 

Also, Kahran and I were the only ones who predicted Green Bay not only winning their division, but that Chicago wouldn't even make the playoffs. I also predicted the Bucs in first place. But, hindsight being 20/20...

I just have to go into in-Lovie-we-trust mode here and have faith in his ability to rebuild the defense without Briggs, and the offense without Jones. I think there are still a lot of great pieces on the Bears, as well as a great coaching staff/front office that has been streamlined, unified, and locked in long-term. VX, why do you think the Bears aren't hungry to win, in fact, not as hungry as the Niners and Buccaneers? I can't see them being complacent with their status while the fucking Buccaneers play with a purpose.

 

Sure, Chicago wins more games than San Fran, but not more than the fucking Buccaneers, who are playing with a purpose.

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I was off on a lot of my other predictions as well. I'm not surprised about San Diego, but I'm shocked that New Orleans is as crummy as it is with no upheaval or major losses in the off-season. The one I really botched though and feel that I should have known better was in the NFC East. Looking back on it, Dallas was clearly a more talented team than Philadelphia.

 

As for the Rams...umm...whoops! At least I called the Niners being crappy.

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Guest Pizza Hut's Game Face

I usually hate the '72 Dolphins on general principle, but man, Mercury Morris just cut a wrestling promo on the Patriots.

 

haha, the hell's this dude talking about. Bride?

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I usually hate the '72 Dolphins on general principle, but man, Mercury Morris just cut a wrestling promo on the Patriots.

 

haha, the hell's this dude talking about. Bride?

 

I think Mercury wants to BUTT rape Tom Brady... who is dressed in a wedding gown? Hell I watched it twice and didn't get it.

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