Gary Floyd

17.) The Dead Hate The Living! (2000) Plot: A band of would be filmmakers go to an abandoned hospital, and find a real dead body-which they use for the movie. It ends up opening a portal to hell-and unleashing some zombies. Review: I make no apologies whatsoever when I say that I like the movie Scream. Sure, I may lose cred to some horror nerds, but I answer only to myself, thank you. I don't like though, what came after "Scream": A series of annoying, self aware horror movies that thought they were clever, but weren't. Case in point: "The Dead Hate The Living", released by the one interesting Full Moon Studios, is proof that a love for zombie movies does not make a good zombie movie. The movie is full of references to other, better horror movies: Return of the Living Dead, The Beyond, Cannibal Ferox, to name a few-and while it's heart seems to be in the right place, it all comes off as fanboyish nonsense, which is essentially what it is. Not only that, it's bad fanboyish nonsense. The acting is non-existence, the references to Bruce Campbell and Fangoria are annoying, the soundtrack-filled with bad horror punk, psychobilly, and horrorcore rap-is grating, and the mugging for the camera hurts as well. To be fair, the zombie and gore FX are decent, but they aren't enough to save this dreck from being any good. Writer/Director David Parker would go on to write the notoriously bad House of the Dead (no, he's not happy with the way it turned out-can't say I blame him), and was originally attached to direct a Michael vs. Pinhead movie, though that movie never came to pass thank God. He also acted in the movie Free Enterprise, which is actually a pretty damn good comedy. Amazingly, when "Dead Hate The Living!" came out, some were praising Parker as one of horror's next big things, which shows how bad the shape of the genre was in at the time. After HOTD, his career never took off or fully recovered. Rating: 2/10 Proof that while anyone can make a zombie movie, not everyone can make a good one. Next Review: Let's Scare Jessica To Death

Eh, not terrible, but not great either. Way too much slow motion. Dr. Manhatten and Mars look good though.

I'm starting to think he'll be dead before then. It's only a matter of time really.

The only OTP (God, I hate terms like that) that I generally like on a TV show is Dean Venture and Triana Orpheus. It's so awkward, it's hilarious (and yes, even a little cute.) I just hope it all ends with Dean finally getting laid...then becoming a total dick. Come on, the thought of that is funny.

Huh huh, you said "hardball"

I've seen it before. To say it's nothing special is an understatement.

Andy Dick Arrested for Groping 17 year old girl Also, holy shit his mugshot

16.) Night of the Sorcerers (1973) Plot: A team of researchers go to Africa end up running into Leopard Vampire Goddesses and their zombie minions. Review: From the man who gave us the "Blind Dead" series comes "Night of the Sorcerers", a wonderfully tacky exploitation mini-masterpiece. First things first: this movie will offend some people. The African natives are portrayed stereotypically (you expect somebody to say "where all the white women at?" at any point"), with grass skirts, masks, voodoo rituals, and kidnapping white women, among other things. Those sensitive to such things should avoid this. Those who fully embrace exploitation movies though, may have a blast. Yes, it's gleefully politically incorrect, but it's an exploitation movie. What do you expect? While there may not be a huge amount of zombie action, the movie fulfills it's exploitation elements: whippings, rape, zombies, vampirism, orgiastic voodoo ceremonies, gory beheadings, a face melted by acid, gratuitous nudity, melodramatic overacting, a fun score, hot chicks in leopard skin bikinis-what's not to love? "Night of the Sorcerers" is not for everyone, but those who love exploitation at it's cheesiest will be in heaven. Rating: 8/10 A real blast for fans of Eurotrash cinema. Come back tomorrow for: The Dead Hate The Living.

Way to report on a story that's 22 years old Seriously, Huffington Post is full of pussies. This is coming from a fellow liberal/Obama supporter.

Metalocalypse slash makes no sense to me, considering that everyone in the band essentially hates each other. Hell, Slash in itself makes no sense. "Hey, here's two guys who hate each other and have no interest in each other sexually. Let's read/write about them fucking."

Yes.

Jonathan the Impaler is going to win. Well, I wish that was the case.

Frank Zappa-"Your Mouth"

15.) Sole Survivor (1983) Plot: The only survivor of a plane crash finds herself being followed by the dead-to finish the job death planned for her. Review: The plot may sound a lot like that of Final Destination, but that's where the similarities end. What we end up getting is an original, relatively gore free horror flick, and anunderrated zombie movie that owes more to Carnival of Souls than Zombi 2. The most intriguing aspect of the movie is it's treatment of the zombies. These are not mindless, flesh eating hordes, or corpses brought back by a chemical leak or voodoo. These are a cruel parody of death, working for the reaper, and working with a serious purpose. They are quite creepy too, and bring forth an aura of serious dread and menace reminiscent of the dead found in underrated fare like Dead & Buried and Messiah of Evil. The acting is also strong, with Anita Skinner playing a convincing lead character. Director Thom Eberhardt would go on to direct the more tongue and cheek apocalyptic zombie movie Night of the Comet, as well as Gross Anatomy and to a lesser extent, Captain Ron. As it stands though, this is his best movie. It's now out on DVD thanks to Code Red (complete with linear notes by genre authority Stephen Thrower), and is worth your money. I recommend it. Rating: 9/10 One of the best 80's horror movies you haven't seen, "Sole Survivor" is an underrated gem. Check it out. Next Time: Night of the Sorcerers

Speaking of Wal-Mart, the place (and other public stores) in 2-3:00 in the morning amuse me, since they have all manner of people you don't see too mcuh during the day. It's great really.

14.) Swamp Of The Ravens (1974) Plot: Dr. Frosta preys on Beggars and Gypsies so he can continue his work on the dead. When his girlfriend leaves him, things get pretty bad. Review: A Spanish/American co-production, "Swamp Of the Ravens" is a good example of a meat and potatoes exploitation movie: it might not meet all the requirements, but it still has enough to count some. The movie itself isn't that much of a zombie movie, as the doctor's failed experiments float and hang around the swamp. It's really more of a Mad Scientist movie, with plenty of evil doings and little if any zombie action. Also, there aren't many ravens in this swamp-there's a lot of buzzards though. Still, the movie has enough sleaze and weirdness to make it watchable. This includes a little gore (including real life autopsy footage), nudity (including necrophilia-not that graphic though), a score that sounds like outtakes from a Yes album, and a weird lounge act with a ventriloquist.They sure don't make 'em like this anymore. "Swamp Of The Ravens" is a decent time waster: it might not meet all of your hopes, but it's watchable, and has it's moments nonetheless. Rating: As a zombie movie, 2/10, but as an old school exploitation movie, it gets 6/10. Tomorrow: Sole Survivor.

TDK will make a certain amount of money.

This really made me laugh.

Hotel for 4 nights = $350 (And thats probably a mid range 2 to 3 star hotel at $75 a night plus taxes booked online) Food for 4 days = $100 ($25 a day which isn't much these days) Admission to Cedar Point for 2 days, parking = $85 Souvenirs and food at Cedar Point = $75 (I always buy a TShirt for a Coaster I've ridden and Im probably gonna eat/drinlk another $40 worth in 2 days easy ) Orioles game ticket/food/parking = $75 Gas for the trip = $150?? (probably at least 3 fillups @ $50 each by this time next year, but who knows) total = $835 (and this is just for me, no one else lol) Id rather set aside $25 a week into a savings account for 48 weeks (11 months) to pay for it then to try and budget it out of my money in my checking account next summer. It should give me about $1200 which should be enough. That's a lot of time, money and effort wasted on a amusement park that is hardly worth any of it. You're joking..right? Cedar Point is the Roller Coaster Capital of the World and 2nd oldest park in North America. They have 17 total roller coasters with the most in the world that top 200 feet. It takes at least 2 days to ride every coaster, something Ive managed to do in 1 day at every other park Ive been to (Kings Dominion in VA and Carrowinds in NC, Busch Gardens in VA, Six Flags in MD/NJ* and Hershey Park) Not to mention this trip also has an Orioles game planned into it as well. * with the exception of Kingda Ka which wasnt open the day I went Marvin's Top 5 Roller Coasters 1. El Toro - 6 Flags Great Adventure (Im not a huge fan of "woodies" but this was the best coaster Ive ever riden, didnt really feel like a wooden coaster) 2. Volcano: Blast Coaster - Kings Dominion VA (the 4 hour long wait for a 45 second ride was worth it) 3. Superman: Ride of Steel - 6 Flags America (Nice long, fast steel coaster) 4. Nitro - 6 Flags Great Adventure/ Apollo's Chariot - Busch Gardens VA (TIE) (basically the same coaster IIRC, real fast and long) 5. Batwing - 6 Flags America (the feeling of flying was nice and riding it in the pouring rain enhanced the experience) with Honorable Mention to Curse of Dar Kastle (Busch Gardens) even though it was a simulator ride. Worst 5 Rollercoasters 1. Loch Ness Monster - Busch Gardens VA (my shoulders were purple and black for 2 weeks after going to Busch Gardens and this ride was responsible) 2. Great American Scream Machine - 6 Flags Great Adventure (serious bruising on my shoulders and a really rough ride) 3. The Joker's Jinx - 6 Flags America (beats your head back and forth to the side on the head restraints..headache inducing) 4. Anaconda - Kings Dominion (I barely fit into the seat and this was 10 years ago) 5. Stormrunner - Hershey Park (I rode this a couple weeks ago, they should sell the ride to the WWF Niagra thing and call it Carlito's Back Cracker, I litterally heard my back crack when the thing went from 0-70 mph in 2 seconds..) With honorable mention to the Spongebob Squarepants "4-D ride" at 6 Flags Great Adventure (My GF is big Spongebob fan..ugh) but I heard they took it down. This is the most depressing post I've read in a good while.

"Don't Go in the House"-not exactly a feel good movie. That blowtorch scene , oh man...

That's awesome. The director said if this one was a hit, then he'd try to get Bruce Campbell in the 3rd one. Guess this bodes well.