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Posted

On the Eddie DVD, he and RVD do alternate commentary for his ladder match.

 

Eddie gets whipped into a ladder set up in the corner, and Eddie rolls off of it, and the ladder starts to tip. In mid-fall, RVD catches it and then on the commentary, you hear "I CAUGHT THE LADDER LIKE A NINJA."

 

The way he says it is hilarious, plus ninjas are effing hysterical. Rob Szatowski has probably made more contributions to this thread than anybody else.

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Posted

"Sid...you big, stupid, dummy..."

I swear, could WCW-era Bret Hart get even lamer?

 

Also, I love Flair's recent "You're a virgin!" schpeel, classic stuff.

 

whenever Bubba Ray Dudley screws up a spot, he never fails to yell "FUCK!" at the top of his lungs. TNN had to bleep him a few times if i remember.

 

-Cheex

Posted
"Sid...you big, stupid, dummy..."

I swear, could WCW-era Bret Hart get even lamer?

(inaccurately quoting)"A fine, upstanding contender who deserves a shot...EL DANDY."

 

Yes...yes I think it CAN get worse.

Guest The Decadent Slacker
Posted

I know Bret said the dummy one in a promo for his SurSeries match with Diesel.

 

"Diesel, you big dummy, i'm coming after you!" or something to that effect. Never liked Bret much on the mic, as a face anyway.

Posted

Bret (on whether he thinks he can beat Disco Inferno)

 

Bret: "Disco always loses, why should facing me be any different?"

Guest bigrockstar
Posted

"Dont be afraid about me stabing you in the back, cause I`m gonna shoot you right between the eyes!"

-Kevin Nash to Hollywood Hogan

Guest The Decadent Slacker
Posted

"You know ladies you might get pricked by my cactus but you will always get to play with my prairie dog."

 

"You know, no matter how many dick jokes you tell, I never get tired of them. Speaking of which, if you take a look over there you will see a lady's chest with our letters on them"

 

"Damn, thats a big chest!"

 

"Now, don’t get me wrong. She's a skank but she's wearing our T-shirt so she gets on TV"- HHH and HBK from Raw ‘98

Guest The Masked Avenger
Posted

Before HBK-Taker HIAC, HBK cuts a (rather uninspired) promo. As he wraps it up, you can see HHH grabbing the mic and drawing breath to say something in support of HBK, but the camera crew no-sell him and go back to the anouncers.

I always found that funny.

 

-TMA

Posted

KOTR 98

HHH is doing guest commentary with JR and King. Chyna's doing commentary at the Spanish announce table.

Lawler: I see Chyna's bilingual. HHH are you bilingual too?

HHH: I'm bi a lot of things but lingual's not one of them.

Posted

Bubba Ray at a Heat Wave

 

referring to the crowd:

 

"We got some faggot in a hawaiin shirt

 

We gotta mother who taught her daughter how to suck dick

 

And some ugly skankasaurus who's gonna take 9" of black dick so far up her ass she won't know what hit her!"

 

(At this point he points to D-Von who does a spastic 'humping' dance.)

 

"And the best part is, none of you have the guts to do anything about it."

 

(Drops mic, gets out of ring starts getting in fans' faces. Aforementioned mother spits in his face, he spits right back. Another guy gets in his face.)

 

Bubba: "Come on you bald, fat, motherfucker!"

 

Cyrus: "How did he know his name?"

 

 

 

Does anyone know the famous New Jack race baiting promo?

Guest The Decadent Slacker
Posted

"Now, Bad Ass, you run your mouth about Summerslam. Well, here's the situation: The Rock says this, if the Rock hits you he'll kill you. If he misses, the wind behind the punch will give you pneumonia and you'll die anyway, so the choice is yours Jabroni."- The Rock

Posted

(Survivor Series 1991 when a miscue from The Rockers cost them the match. What makes it better is that the camera is on Monsoon/Heenan at the time so we can see their expressions)

 

Heenan: Well Monsoon, it's simple. If you'd read the pages of the World Wrestling Federation magazine, you'd know that these guys don't get along.

 

Monsoon: (With headset nearly falling off his head in disgust) THAT'S NOT IN THE MAGAZINE!!! Why don't you get SMART?!?!?

 

Heenan: What? Do you just look at girly magazines all day? You have to read the World Wrestling Federation magazine.

 

Monsoon: Gimme a break!

Posted

When HBK was a short lived member of the nWo in 2002, he was giving a long and boring promo on Raw. During a pause for breath, someone in the front row shouted out, "Get to the point!". It was hysterical, made more so by the fact that the arena was totally silent. They couldn't have cared less about HBK's speech.

Posted
(Survivor Series 1991 when a miscue from The Rockers cost them the match. What makes it better is that the camera is on Monsoon/Heenan at the time so we can see their expressions)

 

Heenan: Well Monsoon, it's simple. If you'd read the pages of the World Wrestling Federation magazine, you'd know that these guys don't get along.

 

Monsoon: (With headset nearly falling off his head in disgust) THAT'S NOT IN THE MAGAZINE!!! Why don't you get SMART?!?!?

 

Heenan: What? Do you just look at girly magazines all day? You have to read the World Wrestling Federation magazine.

 

Monsoon: Gimme a break!

I also remember Gorilla saying "all you do is look at the pictures, I don't think you CAN read!"

Posted
KOTR 98

HHH is doing guest commentary with JR and King. Chyna's doing commentary at the Spanish announce table.

Lawler: I see Chyna's bilingual. HHH are you bilingual too?

HHH: I'm bi a lot of things but lingual's not one of them.

then he followed that up with "Wait did I just mean to say that?" and Jr answered I dont think so but well were live"

 

also from that match

 

"Jr :Remember Survivor Series in Montreal, Shamrock was a one man band and made two members of the nation tap out including The Rock

 

HHH: Now when you say he's a one man band, do you mean he plays his own instrument?"

 

"JR or King: whatd she say (about chyna)

 

HHH: Sometyhing about Taco Bell I dont know they want to go to taco bell and get a burrito supreme"

 

 

WM 13 during the opener feat the headbangers

 

"King: Have you heard of White Zombie Vince?

Vince: WHite zombie? did they play with Tony Bennet?

 

 

King: Your favorite rock group is Mount Rushmore

 

 

King: You still think Fleetwood mac is a new hamburger at Mcdonalds

 

Vince: Theres no telling what Phineas has been doing with those farm animals

Posted

Bobby Heenan at Halloween Havoc 1997, after Eddy Guerrero's errant baseball slide sends him crotchfirst into the ringpost: "It's not the slide that hurts you, it's that sudden stop."

Posted

Kidman at the Russo-returns Nitro in April of 2000, talking to Hulk Hogan:

 

"You say I can't draw flies, but who would know better about drawing flies, than a pile of shit? So Hulk, that leaves on thing, I'm calling your ass out! It's time to see if your balls are as big as your bald-spot!".

Posted

At this year's IWA-Mid South Ted Petty Invitational tournament, when Nate Webb enters and gets the crowd to do the wave:

 

Samoa Joe: Hey look, it's like a WWE pay per view!

Guest GreatOne
Posted

Whoever was looking for the exact (close) RAW bowl quote, here ya go:

 

'I wanna congratulate Tennessee, Colorado, Clemson, USC (all the bowl winners) and a special one goes out to the Smoking Gunns who won the Raw Bowl or Toilet Bowl or whatever.....It was a waste of time, don't bother.'

  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

:headbang:

 

D-Lo Brown and someone I can't remember in a hardcore match, right after D-Lo and Austin were in a 1-800-Collect Commercial.

 

Dlo hits his opponent with the phone and yells at him

 

"Save a bundle by using 1-800 Colllect, fool!"

 

:cheers:

Guest Evolution
Posted
Kidman at the Russo-returns Nitro in April of 2000, talking to Hulk Hogan:

 

"You say I can't draw flies, but who would know better about drawing flies, than a pile of shit? So Hulk, that leaves on thing, I'm calling your ass out! It's time to see if your balls are as big as your bald-spot!".

Man, I don't remember that. I wish I could find the Russo/Bischoff debut Nitro. Such a promising show.

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