Ever got so drunk that you...

[CBright7831 0]

So I decided to get drunk last night and the lovable drunk in me came out and I apparently called people whom I havent talked to in at least six months to wish them a Merry Christmas. Only thing is, I dont remember it...at all.

 

I really need to quit drinking.

 

Post your drunk stories.

 

EDIT - Oh and Merry Christmas

[AntiLeaf33 0]

I remember in college that I decided I wanted to make snow angels after stumbling out of the bar. Problem was that I gave some chick my coat because she was cold and it was about 40 below. Safe to say I was a bit cold when I woke up the next morning.

[Black Lushus 0]

eh drunk dialing is a common occurence.

[CBright7831 0]

I remember talking to two people but the other four I called...not so much.

 

I also cooked some pasta and I dont remember eating.

[Nighthawk 0]

I used to think I did stupid stuff while drunk, but honestly, not so much. I do enough stupid stuff sober that it balances out. People have told me that if I drunk dial them, I sound pretty much the same as I always do. I've done stupid stuff on drugs, plenty of it, but drinking just turns me from Dave into Milky, like the Incredible Hulk, and I'm like that half the time anyway.

 

I did get that DUI, but I really wasn't that drunk that time. I could have driven home no problem. But the law is the law.

[Retard Girl 0]

i've never gotten drunk to the point of doing something stupid. i don't need any help making an ass out of myself.

 

 

 

[Scroby 0]

No.

[HollywoodSpikeJenkins 0]

I made out with a 50 year old women (MILF) at my company's christmas party last week while drunk. It was funny at the time.

[Red Baron 0]

Me and CanadianGuitarist did the bagpipe solo from It's A Long Way To The Top by AC/DC leaving the bar to head to another. The whole night was a blur, but I don't remember if we did anythign stupid.

 

 

[CanadianGuitarist 0]

I've had to put "NO" next to every person on my phone to avoid drunk dialing.

[The Metal Maniac 0]

I've never drunk dialed, but I'll never forget the night that I walked into my friends house, took three steps, and collapsed.

 

About 10 minutes later, I puked. Didn't actually stand up though...just turned my head to the side and watched it spread across the carpet.

 

So nasty.

[Ripper 0]

I have texted drunk. That was impressive. I didn't have any spelling errors or anything either.

 

At the time it wasn't a highpoint for me, but it all worked out in the end.

[Guest Vitamin X]

I have texted drunk. That was impressive. I didn't have any spelling errors or anything either.

 

That's a surprise!

 

Also,

Ever got so drunk that you..., Did stupid things?

NAW NEVER

 

There's been at least a hundred threads posted here that were probably related to something stupid done while drunk, or are themselves a stupid thing someone did while being too drunk.

[Ripper 0]

Actually, your stories are usually about you being really high, so that doesn't count in this thread.

[Cowboy Battlenuts 0]

I've hooked up with a girl that looks like Rachel Dratch, and mounted a fat chick's face like a monkey. One time I knocked over all those blue mail boxes on the main street near my house just to see if I could. Another time I painted my face blue and somehow got in trouble when my friends dog showed up with blue paint on his ass.

 

Nothing really stupid tho.

[Guest Vitamin X]

Actually, your stories are usually about you being really high, so that doesn't count in this thread.

Not true!

 

And that's just two examples!

[Slayer 0]

Let's not forget this dandy

 

Which ultimately led to Leo's Walk of Shame

[Ripper 0]

I've hooked up with a girl that looks like Rachel Dratch

 

 

I would probably fuck Rachel Dratch sober.

 

I don't know why...I just probably would.

[King Kamala 0]

I've hooked up with a girl that looks like Rachel Dratch

 

 

I would probably fuck Rachel Dratch sober.

 

I don't know why...I just probably would.

 

Same here. I don't know why either.

[Cowboy Battlenuts 0]

Well if you guys are into it sober, trust me it's much better after a couple gallons of bud. It was bad though, she was full on pregnant, just without a baby in her stomach. She said she had a beer-belly, I just didn't know it was a 50 year old mans.

[DrVenkman PhD 0]

I didn't inform one of my bosses that part of a building at a work site fell because I didn't deem it important at 11pm. Then I came online and randomly said "What's causing all this?" in some thread.

[Guest Vitamin X]

Let's not forget this dandy

 

Oh god. Hey, you know, funny enough the link under 'true' in my post is actually referencing that night that I drunk-posted.

 

Fucking white kids in Portland tsalking shit.

A couple months ago, I got way too hammered off a bottle of Captain Morgan's and choked this one guy who was being an asshole- sure I was chastised later for choking him, but a. I was drunk and b. he was being a drunk asshole. You gotta neutralize, see.

 

I've actually resolved not to do that again. One of my worst substance use moments, TSM-wise, if not the worst. Although the worst repercussion from all that was having my warning level increased to 8% for barging into the sports folder and calling some brit posters limeys. Which, I don't even think is all that offensive.

[Copper Feel 0]

Limey is an old American and Canadian slang nickname for the British, originally referring to British sailors. The term is believed to derive from lime-juicer, referring to the Royal Navy and Merchant Navy practice of supplying lime juice to British sailors to improve the flavor of grog, which inadvertantly also prevented scurvy in the 19th century. The term is derogatory in the sense that the British would be allegedly more preoccupied with the savings of limes over lemons which were traditionally used to prevent scurvy. The term is thought to have originated in the Caribbean in the 1880s. A false etymology is that it is a derivative of "Corr-blimey" ("God blind me!").

 

The term Limey evolved into a verb "to lime" which means to hang out. The British sailors "Limeys" would hang out in the urban areas when off-duty and patronise the local prostitutes. This has been immortalized in the old calypso "Jean and Dinah" by the Mighty Sparrow in 1956.

 

Are you implying that my people value limes more than lemons?

[Take it 0]

Without lemons, no tequila, no threads like this

 

Ever got so drunk that you thought something was a toilet that wasn't?

[snuffbox 0]

I accidentally pissed on at least one person from a parking garage. I did realize it wasn't an actual toilet, though.

[Lt. Al Giardello 0]

I do stupid things while sober... Being drunk doesn't make any difference.

[Kinetic 0]

I had two interesting things happen to me while drunk this last Thursday. For only the second time ever, I went to a strip club. I ended up having the most awkward, tongue-tied conversation with a stripper. I felt like I was 14 again. Then I came home, started farting around on the board, and, for the first time ever, had a telephone conversation with a board member. It was Incandenza. I don't remember a single thing that was said on either end.

[Nighthawk 0]

I would have called you, but you honestly intimidate me. That is high praise.

[Kinetic 0]

Get outta here! You intimidate me!

[Giuseppe Zangara 0]

Kinetic, you don't have a lisp. Gene was projecting.